GUESS WHAT I'M BACK BEACHES for anyone who will read this lol. Yeah, it's...VERY very late. I had a bunch of guard stuff to do, homework, exam studying, other mandatory projects, and personal shiz. To make it up to y'all, (cuz I do feel really REALLY bad for making you wait so long ;-;) I'm gonna upload the rest of the story in one day. :D Once I finish it all...I figured that making you guys wait for one chapter and then wait for the rest after like twenty years was kinda stupid. It's better to wait a while to get everything at once than to wait a while and get poops, right?

Soooo please enjoy, and I hope it was worth the wait! [I may start a new fic, cuz I still feel SOUPS bad and want to produce something worth the wait ;-;]

Chapter 5: The Panic

The salty sea breeze rustled my hair and my gaze remained on the waves. I felt the ship beneath me slowly rise and fall as I curled up behind the mane of the sunny lion. My hands were pressed to my pounding chest, my heated face lying with comfort on my knees. There was one thing-or person-on my mind, and it made the summer heat unbearable.

"Hey, Luffy," Nami's gentle voice reached my ears over the sound of ocean water smashing against the ship below. I raised my head to let her know I was listening. "We're almost to the next island. It's an archipelago with very tall trees, bubbles, many places to go. Just be careful because there are a lot of other pirates and marine groups, so…" I barely noticed her voice drift off to concerned silence.

"Luffy, I think you need to relax." I unfurled slightly and peeked from where I hid myself. Robin stood next to Nami, arms folded nonchalantly. I looked around quietly, searching for Zoro unadmittedly, and slid off the head sheepishly.

"I...you don't know if that's what I was thinking of…" My fingers twisted at the hem and buttons of my vest, and my eyes were determined to drill holes into the deck.

"It's not as if it's unnoticeable." Nami huffed. I felt a hand take the hat off of my head and gently shift my hair. This was something Robin started doing some time ago to calm me down, and I openly accepted the action.

"Are you afraid of being rejected? Is that why you won't say anything?" I visibly flinched and went still. Nami and Robin went silent, and the hand on my head drew more soothing patterns.

"Luffy, you know Zoro better than all of us," Robin said with a smile. "I am very certain he wouldn't leave your side for any reason, no matter how drastic."

Something in her eyes made me think that she knew something I didn't. Sanji and Brook had acted the same way since I randomly got better at Thriller Bark, but no one will tell me what happened.

"But even...even if he doesn't mind that I…" I coughed forcefully and continued later in the thought. "Isn't it...awkward? To be liked by someone that you...don't?"

"Yes, it can be," Nami grumbled and Robin giggled. I heard Sanji sneeze violently and Chopper rushing to assist as if he had pneumonia. "But it's not worth breaking their heart and leaving. And it's kind of flattering in a way, so I don't mind."

"But what if-"

"Luffy, if I'm to be honest," Robin interrupted. "I think Zoro might feel similarly to you as you do to him."

My face and ears exploded in embarrassed heat. I took my hat from my shoulders and shoved it over my face to hide what I knew had to be blushing and maybe even the soft squeaking leaving my open mouth.

Robin laughed and patted my shoulder. In a few moments, the Sunny Go hit the bay of Sabaody Archipelago. I gratefully forgot about my feelings and jumped to the head, eagerly scanning the scenery. Nami was right; there were a lot of trees with numbers and huge bubbles everywhere. I couldn't see any towns or buildings from where we were, but I was excited to get going.

I was vaguely paying attention to the groups Nami assigned for us to stay together. I stood tall and stretched in hopes of seeing something cool. What I got, however, was my sandal slipping off the wet surface, sending me tumbling into the ocean below. Everything was disoriented; I couldn't save myself or move in the slightest. As water filled my lungs, salty and musky, my vision began to go black.

I opened my eyes weakly and closed them instantly when I felt drips of water slip through my eyelids. A hand wiped the water from my face after I violently coughed up gallons of ocean water from my lungs, and I heard distant voices slowly becoming clear.

"I'm glad he's alright."

"He's an idiot, falling in like that. He needs to be more careful!"

"Yeah, he could've died! A doctor can only do so much."

"That's right, Usopp! Wait...Hey! I'm a great doctor!"

My senses came back in time for me to notice my position. I felt myself being held by a pair of strong arms, one under the crook of my legs and the other supporting my back. I put my head on the chest beside me while I got my bearings, and I recognized a familiar smell that caused my eyes to shoot open in fear.

"Oh, you're awake."

My eyes locked with Zoro's, and I felt like I was going to die. He wore my hat and no shirt, showing his wet, muscular torso. He removed his arm beneath my legs to pass the hat onto me.

"You need to be more careful when you're up there. You know you can't swim, so just…" He kept talking, but my head started pounding unbearably and my ears started ringing. My mind was loosely connected with my body, so I barely noticed when I jumped up from Zoro's lap and tumbled backward onto the deck.

"Woah, Luffy! Are you okay?" Usopp walked up to me and put a hand on my shoulder, but my eyes stayed focused on Zoro's confused face. Everyone was circled around me, looking down at me. It really didn't help the embarrassed heat spreading throughout my entire body.

"Luffy, what's wrong-"

Nami's question didn't register. I shot to my feet and dashed for the island, thinking of running as far away as I could. Everyone called out to me, but I kept running. I, of course, didn't know where I was going, but I had to go somewhere. Anywhere else.

I eventually reached a town bustling with people, laughing and enjoying themselves. I stopped running to breathe for a moment before going into a narrow alleyway. Once I felt hidden enough, I curled into a ball and choked back tears. I was so mad at myself for running away because of a stupid crush. I hugged my knees tightly and inhaled sharply to exhale shaky breaths.

I didn't know how much time had passed, but I finally got to the point where I had calmed down slightly. I hadn't moved from my spot, though, and I doubt I was planning on it. I may have sat there forever if a voice hadn't called me from my daze.

"Luffy…"

I slowly looked up to see Zoro sitting beside me, a bottle of booze in his hand and his eyes glaring at the sky. His chest was still slightly wet, so his red and white striped vest stuck to him slightly. I kept looking at him silently until he looked back at me.

"You feeling better?" I nodded wordlessly and tried my hardest not to break eye contact. "That's good."

We sat in silence, just looking at each other. I felt he was trying to read my thoughts and feelings, but I didn't look away.

"Did I do something? You kind of just ran away, and you looked scared." He took a swig from the bottle, and I unfurled from my ball. "I didn't join your crew to get in your way, so you could just tell me if I-"

"No!" I sat up on my knees to face him. I could feel tears pricking the sides of my eyes, but I held them back. "It's not your fault! I'm just going through some weird stuff or whatever. I don't want to lose you! You're my friend!"

I threw on that last part in hopes of sounding a lot less obvious, but I really did want him to stay. The thought of him leaving was incredibly terrifying, and I couldn't handle that pain.

He seemed slightly taken back by my outburst, but he also looked a lot less tense. He chuckled and took another gulp from his bottle.

"Well, let me help or do something. I don't want to be a useless first mate after what I promised."

I nodded violently. I felt a lot better on the inside, a lot more at peace. I didn't expect Zoro to pull me into an one armed hug, pressing my ear to his chest. Unlike before, I didn't feel panicked or the need to run as far as possible. Instead, I wrapped my arms around him and smiled. At that time, I thought everything was perfect. I didn't need to tell him my feelings, especially if he started acting distant and uncomfortable. If everything stayed the way it was, I would be okay.

As long as Zoro was with me.

Zoro was gone.

My mind couldn't handle that possibility, even though I saw the travesty happen right before my eyes. One second he was there, injured and limping, and the next he was gone. By one touch of Kuma's paw, he was gone. He. Was. Gone.

One by one, all the others vanished as well. Were they dead? Were my friends dead? Was Zoro dead?

Even though I decided not to tell him my feelings in fear of him leaving, my heart tore when I saw he was gone regardless. Why didn't I tell him, I screamed at myself mentally. When everyone else was gone and Kuma was inches from my face, I felt I was already dead. All my friends died, and I was close behind. But the only thing on my mind was a single, haunting question.

Why didn't I tell him I loved him?

Alright alright alright, that's it for this chapter! I'm going to write the next three immediately (that's how many are left, so we're almost there!) so I can post all four at once. I feel so bad, like soups bad. If my feelings were made into soup, it would be so bad it'd be molding. I don't know if that makes sense, but I'm still sad.