I hope you guys enjoy the new chapter! :)
I still couldn't understand it myself, but I had agreed. Maybe it was because of fear that Sebastian may kill me if I didn't agree to the offer or out of simple desperation, but I decided that I would take on this job at the Phantomhive Estate. Late that night,I agreed to let Sebastian escort me to the manor. We had waited out the rain at my request, as I was not quite comfortable having Sebastian escort me in the horrible downpour and this gave me time to process everything that had just happened. The scene replayed over and over in my head. The way I could pinpoint the moment the man had suffered a fatal blow. When I saw the light leave his eyes.
Unfortunately, the rain did not let up for long, as a few moments into the trip the rain started again.
Upon our arrival, I was surprisingly overwhelmed by the appearance of the home, despite having seen it before. I suppose knowing this was my permanent one for the time being had become such an extremely incredible reality. This was...nice.
But, I still couldn't erase the image of Sebastian so ruthlessly killing the man earlier, who had been close to defiling me. Sure, I had questions before about Sebastian. Like, how could he move steel bars without breaking a sweat and paralyze a crowd of people? But..how could he kill without a second thought? I had thought about it many times over in my head and ultimately I came to the same conclusion. If Sebastian hadn't come for me, who knew what that brute may have done to me. Would he have killed me after he'd had his way with me? Kidnapped me? Tortured me? I was thankful that it hadn't taken any of those paths. But I felt guilty for not being as grateful as I could've been. But the way that Sebastian had referred to the man as a foul dog and stepped over his body as if it were apart of the clutter on the floor haunted me. Processing all that had happened had proved to be a difficult task.
The carriage door came flying open, Sebastian awaiting outside with an intense look. Annoyed almost. I stiffened immediately, heart racing in my chest. Even a gasp had escaped me.
"The rain is quite heavy still Miss Haruka. We should make haste."
...Right. I had left the man standing in the rain a good minute I'm sure. So petrified and wrapped up in my own thoughts, I had barely noticed the carriage had come to a stop.
"I'm so sorry!" I exclaimed, stumbling up from my seat. I scrambled to my feet, bumbling out of the carriage disgracefully like some silly fool.
"Allow me to shield you from the elements, Miss Haruka." I barely had enough time to react before Sebastian was taking off his coat, wrapping it around my form. "I apologize for these poor accommodations," He spoke. "I didn't expect such a downpour this evening."
His coat was large and long in size. It was..far too big. Sebastian had practically cocooned the jet black coat around me and I found that I was completely buried in it, my face the only thing visible in this jacket, that really felt more of a coat the way he had fitted it around me. His eyes were wide for just a moment before his lips twitched at the sides, curling up into an obviously crooked smile.
"My, you are quite a bit smaller than I had imagined," He chuckled, eyes glinting playfully. "This will do however." He said this as he circled behind me, his chest at my back. Gloved hands held the jacket tightly around me.
"Quickly now, Miss Haruka." He urged.
"Ah! But Sebastian you're going to get incredibly wet." I exclaimed. I was completely flustered.
"This is why I said quickly," He repeated. "Besides, I would hate to embarrass you in your current state." I hesitated, tossing over the statement in my head. He had a valid point. My dress was in shambles and I looked disorderly as ever. At his now second request I made hace inside of the house, wet turf sploshing beneath our feet. Sebastian held tightly to the jacket all the way inside, pulling it away from me as soon as he was able to lead me to the front door.
"Why go to so much trouble?" I asked quietly, eyes averting from him.
"Why not?" Sebastian countered, his back to me now as the door clicked closed. "You are the Lady Whiston, even in spite of his absence, are you not?"
Not anymore. But I said nothing in response.
"I am more than happy to extend my service to a friend of the Young Master's," He went on, shooting me a warm smile. The butler had turned to face me now, and I could see he was completely soaked.
"S-Sebastian!" I exclaimed. "Please, you should take these off. You'll get sick. Aren't you cold?" I rose my hands up as if to start helping him undress, but the butler quickly grabbed a firm hold
of my hands, pulling me gently towards him.
"You needn't worry, Miss Haruka. Why not go up to your room whilst I take care of this?" I retracted from him, visibly embarrassed. Why had I just prepared to do that? He wasn't Charles.
"S-Sorry. Of course. Um. I will make my way upstairs then."
There was a room readied for me. A different one from when I had been here the first time. I noticed this one was much more posh, apparently by request of Ciel. He wanted for me to be accommodated comfortably despite my newfound stature as a pastry cook.I really couldn't understand how these two were willing to go for such lengths for me - a complete stranger - but I was nothing short of thankful.
"Is this room suitable, Miss Haruka?" Sebastian spoke, picking idly at the fire place.
"More than suitable," I spoke, looking around the room eagerly. "But, do the other servants have accommodations like these?"
"Similar. But not quite. The Young Master would like that you be comfortable."
My eyes dropped to the ground, trained on a point far from Sebastian.
"I couldn't possibly accept this sort of treatment...I can never repay him."
"Ah, of course you can." Sebastian spoke. "Very simply in fact. Please always serve the Young Master earnestly and full heartedly."
Earnestly and full heartedly. Was that how he described killing a man?
"Outwardly," He continued, "My Lord has still requested your services as the Lady Whiston in underworldly cases. He believes that you have a natural curiosity and investigative skills that make you befitting."
Normally I would have said something in protest, but I found myself unable to. I'm not sure. I felt..numb. I felt strange.
"I prefer that you would not refer to me as a Whiston," I spoke. "That name has been long been ripped away from me."
"Yes m'am," He spoke. "Would you prefer that I remain addressing you as Miss Haruka?" I nodded simply in response.
"Very well," He spoke. "In a matter of days, a tailor will come to fit you for a proper working outfit, as well as outerwear. But in the meantime, I have taken a gown from Maylene to accommodate you for the night." I could tell Sebastian was going over a list in his mind.
"I will leave you to rest for the evening, but I will come fetch you in the morning for training."
"Ah, none needed," I finally said. "I have baked many times in the past."
"This was not was I was referring to." Sebastian reached into his coat pocket, pulling out the gun from earlier. "Do you know how to shoot a weapon, Miss Haruka?"
For a good moment there, I was frozen, my eyes locked onto the hand gun he had just pulled nonchalantly out of his pocket. I was stiff, silent. It was the hand gun from earlier that night. The one from Charles's desk.
"The idea of using a weapon like that…" I murmured. "How can you talk so lightly?"
"A gun does not always have to be a deadly weapon. It would be good to know how to protect yourself in the event we become separated."
I felt something I could only describe as sparks chase up my spine at the sound of that. A gun was almost always deadly. He was very kindly trying to tell me, I'm sure, that I needed to be prepared to kill.
If I could recall correctly, Charles had said something to the same effect just before he went missing.
My stomach flopped. I felt sick to my stomach almost instantaneously with the realization. Charles..Did he know he was going to go missing? That we would be separated? We had the same conversation, I remembered it so suddenly and so clearly. And Charles had said the same words so plainly, in the same way Sebastian had. Over tea I think? That was Charles's way; he was so casual about matters such as these and fascinated with the smaller things in life.
The memory was distinct.I was surprised at myself for forgetting it in fact. I remembered the way the revolver Sebastian held felt in my hand. A nervous finger on the trigger, petite smallish hands afraid to even grip it tight in fear of a misfire.
Sebastian had gone on talking, listing some other things I had to train for, but I was barely listening. In fact, I interrupted him.
"Perhaps I should retire for the night if we're to do all that much." I spoke with difficulty. "I need...time. To think about all this." Sebastian paused briefly. I couldn't see his expression but I'm sure he was shocked. Or maybe annoyed since I had interjected. I had seen the way he reacted at Madame Red just last night.
"Ah, of course. I did not mean to bombard you with so much information," Sebastian apologized, bowing deeply. "But, you must allow me to help you out of that dress. It's completely tarnished."
"N-No," I stammered. "That's okay..I'll be fine. Really. After all," I laughed nervously, "You didn't allow me to take yours off earlier."
There was a pause for a moment as I processed what I had said. He said nothing at first, just looked down at me and seemed..mildly amused?
A feeling of dread washed over me as I realized what I had said. Why did I word it that way? Embarrassing. It's not as if I wanted to undress him. Or maybe I did? Sebastian was pretty attractive, but I had done well in not alerting him to this...right? Or maybe I hadn't. I was only trying to be helpful earlier! Just like he was. So why did that sentence sound so wrong aloud? As soon as the words escaped my lips, I clasped a hand over them trying to stifle a gasp. And of course Sebastian had picked up on this compromising wording, a brow raising and those lips of his twitching at the corners. I was mortified.
"Ah. What I meant to say was that I-"
"No need to explain," Sebastian spoke. "It has been quite a long night hasn't it?" He let the words linger in the air as we met eyes for a treacherously long second. The butler purposefully stepped forward to get into my personal space, but just far enough that we weren't touching at all. This did nothing but heighten my anxiety.
"We should both get rest; Wouldn't you agree?" He paused, his arm raising. "My, you're as red as a ripe tomato." Smirking lightly, his hand rose to my face, moving my blunt messy bangs aside to rest the back of his hand against my hot forehead. His knuckles dusted over my forehead, soft fabric on my skin. Only for a moment, he allowed this touch. Quickly drawing back from me, he had straightened again, an easy smile on his face.
"I hope that you haven't caught a fever from being out in the rain tonight," He chirped. All of a sudden that flirty, breathy demeanor had vanished. "You should sleep with two blankets tonight, just in case."
I hesitated at first, trying to process what he had just done there.
"R-Right!" I chirped back, taking a step away from him. No. I was determined to not fall into this trap. Embarrassment? Fear? I felt a bit of both, knowing that the other was simply teasing me and enjoying every second of my awkward reactions. It felt almost cruel. Like a spider teasing the prey in its web.
"Goodnight, Sebastian." I watched his expression carefully now. I don't think the butler had anticipated me to step away from him. To almost cooly shrug off his flirtatious gesture. I felt powerful for it when I saw the stunned look on his face. The way he hesitated for the slightest second…
"Sleep well, Miss Haruka." Were the last words he uttered to me that night.
Dreams. Dreams. Dreams. Some say they say they're the windows to our souls. Others say they can be premonitions and warnings from your subconscious. So, you can naturally imagine my surprise and discomfort when I found myself dancing about in a boneyard, cold and desolate.
It had been any old dream at first. In fact, it had been a memory of dancing with Charles in a meadow, giggling and flirting like we had when he had first met. I had this dream a few times before. The banter was always the same, until suddenly tonight..it wasn't.
A dip and a spin. Done carefully so that he had pulled me into his chest. I hadn't expected anything different but to continue dancing in the open meadow, but when Charles spun me back out to face him, he wasn't Charles at all. Pale. Red eyes and dark hair. Somehow Charles had turned into Sebastian. And the meadow we danced in was no longer green and lush but dead and decaying. Bones beneath our feet.
Instantly, I had felt myself getting nervous. Sebastian looked wild, even in spite of the suit he wore. I could see it in his eyes. He really looked like a wolf in sheep's clothing. And the way we danced was fast and quick paced; I could barely keep in step with him. But I suppose what really turned it into more of a nightmare than anything was his peculiarly vibrant red eyes. They were definitely inhuman. I'm not sure why I had never realized this before. Why I had brushed off the vermilion eyes as if they were normal.
"Can you keep up with me?" He laughed. His tone of voice was far different. Not the velvety one I recognized and something that sounded raspy. Devilish.
I hesitated to answer him. His steps were quick. I was really just barely keeping up with him, and I was asking myself the same question internally.
"Of course I can," I answered back. "What fun would it be if we stopped now?" The words had poured from me before I knew it, and they sounded oddly familiar. Had I said something like that before?
"Good," He chuckled. "It would be a shame, really, if the mouse was caught so quickly by the cat."
The sentence seemed out of context. Out of place in our brief conversation. Of course, in my dream I hadn't the time to analyze this.
"Let us see what tricks this meek little mouse has up its sleeve."
And then that was it. I woke with start, drenched in sweat and my heart racing in my chest. I took a moment to gather myself, my eyes unfocused as I stared up at the ceiling practically panting. It really did feel as if I had just been dancing. Ragged breath and sweat dripping down my face, I decided. Before I could embark on this journey to seek out Charles and the perpetrators of that crime, I needed to know who Sebastian and Ciel really were. Who were these people and what was the nature of my husband's relationship with them?
Soon after this chapter, you'll start learning more about Midori Haruka!