I did not see Edward for the rest of the night.
Alec had told me he had retired to his room with the two women for the night.
I tried to play it off as if I did not care.
But I did. I cared and wondered why he acted so cold around me when I was his guest. Yet, he would look at me sincerely as if he could really see me.
He was giving me whiplash.
So at the end of the night we were back at the Masen Manor and I had finally peeled out of my dress and got into my pajamas. Alec came in, opening the covers for me as he talked about one of his trips to Iceland a years before I came into his life.
"Alec?" I said softly under the covers, my fingers fidgeting against each other as my eyes casted down.
"What is it little doe?" He asked, running his fingers through my hair.
"At the party…" I stopped, second guessing myself as I inhaled a deep breath. "Your kind… They were… Doing things to the humans…"
Alec nodded his head.
He knew exactly what I was talking about.
"I'm not sure you want to know, innocent one." He smiled wirily but I did not reflect it. He exhaled loudly and sat down at the edge of my bed, reaching forward to tap my chin gently. "I've been hiding things from you, Bella."
"What things?"
"Things humans are not supposed to know. But because my kind is wretched creatures, some humans know." He trailed off, his red eyes glancing up at me. "Do you know what a donor is, Bella?" He asked softly as I shook my head. "I'm not sure if you want to."
"I do." I said eagerly.
Alec pressed his lips together and nodded.
"A human donor is the other half of a vampire. It's what keeps them alive. It is kind of an unwritten rule to have one. Too many people were dying, too many innocent people. So they picked humans from off the street and the humans become their… Slaves. They need their blood. They drink enough to be satisfied, but stopping just before the humans die. After that they don't need to drink until a week later and by that time, the humans have created more blood."
"Do these humans…" I began, my voice trembling. "Do they… agree with it?"
"Some do. Some like the feeling of being bitten. There is a fine line between pleasure and pain, Bella. And some humans enjoy the mixture of both." He shrugged, rubbing my knee gently.
"And the people who don't like it?" I whispered.
"There are some humans who have no choice. They are chosen at random. But they can not do a thing about it. If they are chosen… they are chosen."
"And then they suffer being sucked on for the rest of their lives?"
"Either that, or die." He answered simply.
"I'd rather die."
Alec watched me, most likely judging my reaction to this news. His lips pursed together as he then looked away, as if he had something to say but couldn't.
"Do you ever wonder why I take blood from you?" I shook my head.
And now that I thought of it… I didn't know.
He had been doing it twice a week since as long as I can remember.
I never asked him why.
I thought it was normal.
"I drink it, my doe." He said softly, bowing his head. I gasped under my breath, feeling my body went cold. "You are my donor."
I didn't say anything.
I couldn't.
Maybe I should have paid attention more. Maybe I should have asked. But it was so normal that he took blood that I didn't think anything of it. I should have asked. I should have at least said something about it.
"I know you're probably scared. You have every right to be. But you know I wouldn't hurt you, right?" Alec asked, watching as I slowly nodded my head. "All I want is to protect you."
"You don't bite me." I said quickly.
"No." He answered.
"Why not?"
"Because that is barbaric, Bella. Biting is someone's way of saying that they own you. I do not own you. You are your own person." He told me honestly, easing my anxiety. "I would never take away your freedom." He said tightly.
"You would take away someone else's?"
"I do what I can to survive. I've been doing well for the past eleven years." He smiled.
"Does a vampire keep the same donor?" I asked.
"No. They change usually every other year." He said.
"Always?"
"Not always. Some have kept the same donor until they died from old age. And of course, you have been with me since you were six." He said. "It depends on their preference."
"Did you ever want to leave me?" I choked.
"Never, ma biche. You were all I needed." He smiled, leaning down to kiss my forehead. "I know this is a lot for you to take in. I didn't want to tell you until I knew you could handle it."
"Victoria… Is she Edward's donor?" I asked.
"Yes."
"And what about the blonde woman who is always with him? The vampire?"
"That's Irina. She is kind of a… Bed warmer." Alec grinned and I flushed with white, regretting I had asked. "I know he has been meaning to change is donor, though."
"Oh."
"You are welcome to question me about anything else, Bella. But you must sleep first." He told me, grabbing my hand in his cold one and bringing it up to his lips. "We have a big day tomorrow before we leave."
"What are we doing?"
"More sight-seeing, little one."
"Okay." I yawned. Alec leaned down to kiss my forehead. I may have been tired but I could not sleep. My mind rattled with different thoughts.
Donors.
Vampires.
Blood.
Edward.
It wasn't until much later that I was able to sleep peacefully.