Chapter 27: still boundaries?
[Ryan's pov…]
Kathrin gave me a confused look, which I returned, as she got dragged towards my bedroom… what's happening?
I looked over at Felix when I couldn't see Kathrin and Amelia anymore, and I didn't get too much out of his look…
"So… what's up?" I asked…
"Nothing…" Felix replied suspisuosly… okay…
Felix then started walking over to me and when he was close enough to reach out and touch me, he did… he put his hands on my shoulders…
"Don't even try… I know something's up and I want to know what…" I said… he just looked at me for a while and laughed a little… why?
"Nothing's up, but something will be soon!" Felix said before he kissed me… pfft, something will be up…
"Switch…" Amelia said and the kiss broke… damn… it was starting to get really…
"Yeah I wondered why you went up…" Felix said, successfully snapping me out of my thoughts, as I looked at him… I like what I see…
He gave me a small push signalizing that he wanted me to follow him… and I did… and just… right now everything about him just makes me want to… do stuff…
As we walked up towards my bedroom I couldn't help watching his tail as it swung back and forth when he walked…
"So let's continue where we left off?" Felix asked when we had gotten to my bedroom…
"Fuck yeah" I replied before walking over to him and placed my hands on his head to pull him in for another kiss…
His hands rested on my hips, pulling me closer to him… heavy panting as our lips parted and just… hot damn…
"So… does the whole testing your boundaries still count?" Felix asked… hadn't really thought about that…
"I… I guess… I'm still not too sure how far I want to take this…" I answered… what am I even saying? Is that really how I… am I really sure? Is there any doubt in my mind? I guess thinking like this makes that a yes… most likely because of that goddamn person of interest… damn it Felix! Why did you have to have another person!? Fuck…
"Well then… tell me to stop when we've gone far enough…" Felix said… naaaw, he thinks about me… he's so cute… I'm really starting to sound like a girl aren't I? Damn it Ryan! You're a manly man aren't you!?
"I will…" I replied, and both of us kinda just stood there and looked into each other's eyes for a while…
"Well I'm a manly man so I'll make the first move!" were my last thoughts before Felix made the first move… damn it Felix… and in case you were wondering, he kissed me… that was his move…
"Damn it Felix I was going to make the first move!" I said after the kiss ended…
"Sorry, but you were too slow…" Felix replied…
"I'll show you too slow!" I said, and I was about to pull him in for another kiss, but he was faster… he kissed my neck, and damn do you even know how good that feels? Nibbling and just… wow… that made me forget the whole "manly men makes the first move" thing…
"Still too slow" Felix then whispered into my neck… fuck, that's hot…
"Doesn't matter just… damn…" I said… feeling quite needy at the moment…
Felix just chuckled a bit into my neck and damn it he should stop doing that because I can't even… fuck this!
Counter attack time!
I let my hands travel across his back as I nibbled on his earlobe, and I chuckled slightly in triumph at the groan I got out of him as my hands got a hold of his hips and pulled him close enough for our hips to touch.
Yeah, that's right! Two can play that game Felix!
"Ryan…" damn… hearing him say my name like that… wow… and all the kisses being placed on my neck and just… fuck…
I have a feeling that I'll have to decide on how far I'm willing to take this right now, or else there won't be any boundaries…
His hands got more daring as they started exploring underneath my clothes… this is going way too fast for me to be able to figure out my boundaries…
But damn… I know one thing for sure… I REALLY want this…
"Felix… I guess… I guess anything except going all the way would… I…" I started, but the rest of the sentence was lost when I looked into his lust filled eyes…
"So… only touching?" Felix asked… yeah that's pretty much it… I need to figure out stuff like this as fast as possible… I'm probably just thinking too much about the whole person of interest and how does he really feel about me stuff… but will I be able to go further even though I know all of that?
I guess I need to just sit down and get to know myself better sometime…
"I… guess…" I said…
Felix stared into my eyes for a while… looking for something I guess? That's the feeling I got at least… what could he possibly look for?
I gave him a questioning look in return…
"What?" I asked, not too sure what he was looking for… by the looks of it he wanted the answer to something… but what?
"Nothing…" he replied before he gave me a hug… hugs are nice too…
"If you say so…" I said, returning the hug…
It's weird how much I've changed… I used to care about so many things… well… I still do care about all those things… but… but now… as long as Felix… I couldn't care less about all those things… as long as I have Felix…
Fuck…
This is getting dangerous Ryan…
What if he decides to leave you? Or worse…
What if he decides that he wants to be "just friends"?
What are you going to do with your life then?
Fuck… there's no turning back now is it? And to think that Felix was the one that asked ME out…
Felix, you goddamn jerk… I love you…
The hug is still going on? I thought it would be over before I could realize it… things usually work like that for me recently… whenever I start thinking about stuff something happens and I get surprised by the fact that time doesn't wait for me to finish thinking…
Damn… he's so warm…
I couldn't help letting my hands slide underneath his t-shirt, feeling his bare skin against the palm of my hands…
He's not reacting though… maybe he's thinking too? Maybe it's my turn to snap HIM out of it?
"Felix…" I said, but it came out as more of a whisper… a horny whisper… Ryan you have to learn how to control your own body…
"Wha- oh… right… sorry Ryan… I kinda got lost in my thoughts there…" Felix said as he pulled back a little, successfully ending the hug… he's blushing…
"Don't worry about it… I get lost in my own thoughts all the time…" I replied, and I couldn't have held back the smile that appeared on my face even if I wanted to…
He chuckled slightly before he kissed me… and it was one of the sweetest kisses you could ever imagine…
We ended up ending the "sexy time" there… mostly because I didn't want to go any further right now…
After the whole him looking for something in my eyes and then hugging me episode he had gotten so distant… and I KNOW I don't want to go further when he's like that… why did he get so distant though? Was it something I did? No… can't be right? What were his thoughts during the hug? What was he looking for in my eyes? Maybe he was trying to figure out something within himself? Like... Wait! Maybe he was thinking about the whole person of interest thing!?
Felix goddamn it! What made you so distant!?
You've completely conquered my heart haven't you?
Damn…
The thought of my heart belonging to him was so intense that I nearly felt like crying…
"Hey let's go down to the others…" I said…
"Huh, oh yeah, sure…" Felix replied…
"What's on your mind?" I asked, not able to hold myself back anymore…
"Umm… nothing I guess… just… umm… the party." Felix answered, and I could tell he was lying… well if he's that much against telling me, then I guess I'll just leave it at that…
"Hmm… I wonder if we'll have to tell them that we're dating…" I said in an attempt to make a conversation out of this so that he can stop being so distant…
"Don't worry about it… it'll probably be alright!" Felix replied, a little more cheerful now… but the fact that he said "don't worry about it" actually made me worry about it… nothing good ever happens when he utters those words… I wasn't really worried, but now I am…
"Yeah… you're right…"
-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o -o-
I'm so sorry! the reason I haven't made any new chapters is, as I stated on my tumblr, that every time I try to write anything on this fic I get a headache... and after about 3 sentences I feel like I've written an entire chapter...
during this chapter I had a small period where I wrote a lot, well I thought it was a lot at least... and I was like, YES NOW I CAN FINALLY CONTINUE AGAIN... and I thought I had written more than a chapter, but as it turned out I had only written 126 words... and my chapters are 1500 words minimum... (although I've broken that rule on some of the chapters...)
and I bring you more sad news...
I don't have internet... but I will have it when I come back to Norway... which is on the 2nd... but I won't be active until the 3rd... so... yeah...
how can you say that you don't have internet when you're posting this chapter? well that's because I'm sitting at a restaurant, and I'm suspicious as fuck...
damn... I feel like everyone is watching... QAQ
guys, guys... I also wrote a different thing... by different thing I mean a different ending or something like that... well... I find it hard to write when the characters (in this case pewds and cry) have so much sexual tension between them and all I want to do is make them take eachother already! damn... but then I know I can't do that yet and I have to write some sort of believable end to sexy times... those are the times I change the color and write the end I want them to have... like sexy times... most of the time those ends up being only like 1 to 4 lines, and they're usually really exaggerating like "He ripped off my shirt and touched everywhere and we went at it like bunnies the whole night!"...
I use these to be able to continue the story... but this time it was a little different... I wrote it like it could have been a part of the story...
so question: would you like me to post this? (I had originally planned to post all these things when I had finished the story... but seeing as I haven't posted anything in a while... and wont continue it before the 3rd...)