He woke up in the healer's tent, flat on his back with the ache of fatigue in every cubic centimeter of his body. Even breathing was slightly more painful than he thought was worth it. A soft groan escaped him as he tried to turn his head. Even grimacing hurt. Why? He wondered. Why do I always end up in here like this? I'm not even injured, really.
"But you are an idiot." Star said, stepping up next to his bed to stare down at him. She looked disappointed. Ackala stepped up next to her, glaring.
"What she said." He agreed.
T'reth would have laughed that this was what they finally decided to agree on, but he was sure that wouldn't be worth the pain and he wasn't in the laughing mood, anyway. The same went for talking.
Go away, he thought. I'm tired. I hurt. You're not helping.
Star snorted and walked away, and Ackala glared down at him for a moment longer before following her. T'reth closed his eyes and went back to sleep.
~0~
The fatigue hadn't gone away at all the next time he woke up, but some of the aching had. He focused hard on the cup of water in his hands, trying to hold it steady.
"Sir, you are very weak, there's no need to rush yourself." Middan cautioned gently.
T'reth sighed, putting the cup down and frowning at the roof of the tent. "What happened while I was asleep?" He asked whoever was listening.
"You mean in the week you've been asleep?" Star clarified, melting out of the shadows in the corner. Middan smirked and walked away to check on his other patients.
"Week?!" T'reth exclaimed, trying to sit up. He flopped back down, shaking, before he got more than halfway up.
"Week!" The goddess repeated, enunciating sharply. She peered down at him, still visibly disappointed, though the silvery sheen to her eyes made it a little hard to read her. "What have I told you about attempting attacks I haven't taught you properly?"
"Not to." He muttered, eyeing his cup of water, wishing he could get it to his mouth to drink more of it.
"Exactly." She snapped, flicking her hand. The water sprang out of his cup, but kept the shape, and moved toward his face as if he were lifting the cup himself. He cautiously drank when it reached his lips, and felt slightly ridiculous and a little bit bizarre to be drinking water suspended in midair. "Light shards are a highly advanced technique. The amount of energy you are required to channel takes years to learn to use safely, and your concentration must be far sharper than yours is currently. You're lucky you didn't hurt yourself. I'm frankly shocked you managed to kill anyone." Star went on while he drank. "You've delayed the entire war with this little stunt, T'reth." She flicked her hand again and the water sloshed back into his cup, some splattering on his blanket. He frowned slightly, and then looked up at his Guardian.
"Why didn't you heal me, then?" he asked.
Star's eyes narrowed, starting to glow slightly, and the mortal understood that she was displeased. "I am not here to save you from your own stupid choices. Every student of magic must learn this lesson at some point. You will learn it now, and we will not delay this campaign any longer."
T'reth sighed as she turned away. "That's fair. May I at least be included in the planning?" He asked.
"Fine." Star said, and swept through the tent door.
~0~
T'reth limped through the city, smiling at everyone he recognized as one of his people. Ackala hovered at his elbow, ready to catch him when he inevitably stumbled. T'reth sighed as his brother pulled him back into a standing position and glanced around, pointing out some crates nearby that they could sit on for a moment. He needed a quick break.
"We should head back to the healer's tent." Ackala said, eying his brother. "You still haven't regained your strength, T'reth."
The general sighed, slumping down in defeat. He didn't reply for a long time. Ackala sat down next to him, watching the men and women they had gathered from all quarters of the land bustle about making preparations for their most enterprising attack.
"We march for the capitol tomorrow." T'reth said quietly. "This is everything we've been working towards for decades, Ackala." He looked up at his brother, disappointment in his eyes. "But I can't be there to see it, because I wouldn't survive on the front lines without restricting someone else's ability to fight."
"Yup." Ackala slapped the smaller man on the back. "That's what you get for being stupid."
T'reth smiled halfheartedly and ran a hand through his hair with another sigh. "I guess it is."
Ackala put an arm around his shoulders, comforting him gruffly. "Hey, you might not be there to see the walls come down, but you'll get to set up a new form of government. You'll get to tell everyone that they're free to go where they want and be what they want. You'll get to see what we've been working for. You just don't get to storm the castle with us. And who's to say this is even the last battle? It probably won't be, let's be honest."
T'reth sat up a bit, smiling a little more honestly. "Yes. I suppose this battle isn't really what we've been fighting for—it's what comes after, isn't it."
Ackala patted his shoulder. "That's the spirit. Now let's get back. I've got to go check on the catapult construction."
T'reth frowned as his brother and second in command helped him to his feet. "But I wanted to see the catapults." He complained.
Ackala groaned. "It'll take half an hour to get over there at this rate."
"Fine." T'reth sighed. "I guess I'll see them tomorrow."
"I'll make sure you're on a wagon at the front, just so you can see them."
T'reth laughed a bit. "Alright, deal."
~0~
He had seen catapults before. The castle had catapults. But those catapults were mostly hidden, tucked away in towers and protected. Theirs were smaller, and made entirely of wood, but they seemed large compared to the people and animals hauling them. T'reth was impressed they'd managed to make ten in the week he'd been out of the action. Of course, as Star had pointed out, getting the wood was the hardest part and—being the logging capitol of the country—Woodworm had been well equipped to supply them.
The general leaned back, enjoying his ride. He spotted Star leading a band of men and women toward the nearest catapult and watched as they climbed on and cast several protective charms over the structure. He tracked the gentle shimmer of power as they moved on to the other catapults.
His people were happy in their march, excited for this monumental battle they would participate in tomorrow. Their freedom, the freedom of their families and their descendants was finally at hand! And surely, surely they could not lose.
Not when they had a goddess on their side.
They knew all too well by now, of course, that not all of them would survive. T'reth smiled softly at the menfolk walking with their families, carrying their children in their arms and on their shoulders. It was a long walk. It was good that so many of them were taking the time to enjoy what they had while they still had it. He turned to the woman sitting next to him on the back of the wagon, tending to her infant son.
T'reth had no blood family that still considered him family. But he had spirit family, and he was all too happy to spend time with them.
"May I hold him?" he asked. Lalita looked up and smiled, carefully passing the tiny human over to him. T'reth studied his nine-day old nephew for a long time, and when he looked back Lalita was asleep. He smiled, happy to hold the child while she rested. At least until he started crying. T'reth couldn't really do anything about the little guy being hungry; he really did need his mother for that.
But until then, T'Hallan could stay with him.
~0~
They set up camp just outside Havenfield. The city looked dark as night fell. When they sent scouts in, they discovered that the city surrounding the palace was virtually empty. That was a relief for T'reth. There would be fewer civilians caught in the crossfire, this way.
He observed the palace lights from his seat on one of the catapults, thinking over their battle plans, searching for flaws. The Royalists hadn't noticed them yet, and they wouldn't until the attack began tomorrow morning. Star had assured them of that. The castle walls should have been the hardest to get through; between Star and the catapults, though, they wouldn't be much of a problem. Their true struggle would be finishing the fight once they got into the palace.
T'reth wished he could be there, fighting with his men. But he still couldn't even walk for very long without becoming exhausted. Fighting was out of the question. He sighed to himself.
"Are you ready to be done with the fighting?" Star asked softly from above him.
He looked up with a smile as the creature slid down the catapult post to join him. "Of course."
"And looking forward to the politics that come after." She might have been teasing him, but it was with a perfectly straight face, so it was hard to tell.
T'reth laughed anyway. "Not necessarily. It's not going to be easy, you know. None of the Royalists are going to want to agree with anything we have to say."
"Oh, no, that's a given. But eventually they will concede." Star assured him, turning her gaze on the palace walls.
"What about you?" T'reth asked, ignoring the heaviness in his heart for the answer. "Think you'll be around much longer?"
Star tilted her head, ruffling her feathers. They almost seemed to glow in the moonlight. "My Oath is not fulfilled until your cause is successful, T'reth." She looked down at him, her gaze gentle. "I will stand with you in the political field as I have stood with you on the battlefield."
He smiled, his dread for the coming upheaval lessening. "I am grateful, Great One." He murmured. They watched the palace for a long moment in silence before T'reth spoke again. "What of our Oath-Bond, Star?" he asked quietly.
Star didn't answer for an even longer moment. Then she sat down, folding her wings close to her back. "When you stopped me, when we formed that bond." She started quietly. "You told me I didn't have to make myself be alone like I was."
"And you don't." he confirmed.
A smile twitched across her face before fading again. "I do not. And I wasn't always." She was quiet for a while before glancing over at him. "Do you understand why I was?"
T'reth looked at her. "If I understand correctly, you outlive everyone you know. Except the Gods, of course."
"Even them, T'reth." She corrected in a murmur. "Even your gods will pass into a whisper of once was, and their lifespan will have only brushed against mine. Mortals are even shorter lived. Less than a blink." She looked up at the glittering sky, her eyes clouded over with silver. "Why would I waste my time getting to know anyone who passes in less than a blink?" she whispered.
"I don't know." He replied. "When you put it in perspective, you're right. It doesn't make sense, on your end. But I'm glad I know you. I'm glad I had that opportunity, even if you don't feel the same way."
She looked at him again, the silvery sheen leaving her blue eyes. She started to smile. "Thank you. I am… I am glad that I know you, too, T'reth. I think I shall remember you, when you are gone."
He smiled back. "Thank you. I think that's the most a lot of us can hope for—to be remembered, after we're gone."
They turned back to watching the palace, comfortable in each other's presence. T'reth was starting to get tired, but he knew there was one other thing he wanted to ask while they were on this topic; something he had noticed a long time ago, but had never been brave enough or found the right time to bring up.
"That isn't it, though, is it." He murmured. "That's not the only reason you pushed everyone away."
The goddess went perfectly still beside him, a chill coming to the air around her. He glanced over, a smirk tugging at his lips.
"You're not as different from us as you seem, Great One." He told her. "I know emotional damage when I see it. Someone hurt you, didn't they?"
The shadows swallowed her before the words left his lips. T'reth shrugged to himself, sliding to the ground to head back to his tent. In this case, no answer was the same as a confirmation. And that was enough to sate his curiosity, at least for now. She might come around and talk to him later—after everything she had done for them, he'd be happy to try and do something for her.
But for now… he would let it lie.