A/N: Sorry for the delay. This chapter is based on Babes in Toyland. Hope you enjoy.
Roxas grinned across the table at the red-head. He wasn't sure why the writer had insisted they go out to a fancy restaurant but he had dutifully dug out his suit and had spent a good fifteen minutes fighting to knot his tie. The restaurant itself wasn't busy – nothing in Traverse Town was – but the food was delicious. So was the wine. Roxas was more than a little tipsy by the time they headed back to the hotel. The blond normally stuck to a "one glass of alcohol" rule when he drank but Axel was being particularly sneaky that night and kept topping off his glass when the blond wasn't looking. Why, he would never know, especially as it seemed that Axel was the more nervous of the two of them. As it was, dinner ended with Axel supporting Roxas out of the restaurant, keeping one arm tight around the smaller man's waist as he hailed a cab.
"In you go, darling," Axel stated, helping the intoxicated man into the car. Roxas plastered himself along the taller man's side as the writer slid into the car next to him. "I'm sorry; I wasn't actually trying to get you drunk. I was just nervous and forgot you were such a fucking light-weight," Axel explained.
"Your apology sucks and it is no way, shape or form accepted," Roxas groused. "If I get sick you can bet your ass that I'll be throwing up on you."
"You do that and I'll sock you in the face," Axel promised, running a hand through the blond's tangled curls.
"As always, your bedside manner leaves something to be desired," Roxas shot back, rubbing his face against the soft cloth of Axel's dress shirt.
"I fear I'm more suited to inflicting injuries than treating them," Axel stated, paying for their cab ride before assisting the intoxicated man into the hotel.
"Hey... Hey, Axel?" Roxas asked, sliding down the wall the writer had propped him against.
"What is it, love?" Axel asked as he dug out his hotel room key.
"I hate whoever broke your heart." The red-head paused before he continued unlocking the door and picking the smaller man up.
"Who said my heart was broken?" he asked, setting the blond on the bed.
"Your book," Roxas explained. "Your first one. It made me want to cry," he confessed. "And I hate whoever made you feel that way."
"You are aware that I write fiction, correct? Yes, there was a break-up but nowhere near as bad as all that." Axel admitted as he prepared the blond for bed. "And as for my heart, it has been abundantly healed by a sarcastic blond editor – one I fully intend on marrying someday when he's not completely wasted." Axel confessed as he brushed Roxas' bangs out of his face and placed a soft kiss to the smaller man's forehead.
"Mm, good thing the editor is completely in love with the impossible, language-mangling writer," Roxas stated as he drifted off to sleep. Axel grinned, shaking his head before sitting down to type.
"Down in the square, in the Mother Goose Village square," voices sang. Roxas jerked awake at the noise. "The people gather when there's some excitement in the air!" The blond groaned and began following the gaggle of dancing people.
"Axel, what land did you get us stuck in this time?" he asked irritably. There was no response and the smaller man turned to locate his companion. "Axel? Hey, let me go!" he cried as the dancers grabbed the blond and tugged him along.
"Come join the crowd, you'll be happy and mighty proud!" The group sang as Roxas' dancing partner spun him around.
"I think I'm gonna be sick!" Roxas cried as his hangover finally registered.
"Here comes Bo-Peep, who is never without her sheep," they continued, creating a path and shoving the blond out of the way.
"Hey!" Roxas cried as someone pushed the blond against a stone wall. Several different colored sheep trailed after a little blonde girl in a pink dress to the center of the square as the company continued singing. Roxas decided it was safest to just wait until the musical number was over before trying to ask any questions. "Why the hell is everybody singing?" he muttered crossly as he rubbed his temples. He zoned out as the crowd sang about Jack and Jill and others but his attention caught when the group sang about a wedding in the Garden Glade. "Hey! Where are you taking me?!" Roxas demanded as he was led to a small blue house.
"Tom!" the crowd sang out, and suddenly there was Axel. "Mary!" the crowd sang again and Roxas was pushed onto the porch of the house. Axel grabbed his hand and led him down the heart-shaped steps to the center of the square.
"Axel, what the hell is going on?" Roxas whispered as the red-head began dancing with him. "And why am I the girl?"
"Hell if I know," Axel muttered. "I don't remember how we got here, do you?" Roxas' brow furrowed in concentration as he tried to remember exactly what had happened.
"No," he answered. He tried to wrack his brain some more but he was distracted by another thought. "Where the hell did you learn to dance?" Axel grinned and dipped the blond but didn't answer. "Seriously?" Roxas asked, clearly unimpressed, but their conversation was interrupted as the two were suddenly lifted and carried around the square before being set down in front of the steps leading to the blue house.
"To Tom and Mary, drink a lemonade!" The crowd sang. Roxas sighed in relief. Hopefully he and Axel would have a chance to talk once they were alone in the house. Instead of being left alone, however, the two were herded back into the square where the entire town felt the need to clink their glasses of lemonade in a toast to the couple. Roxas could feel his eye begin to twitch.
Later that night, when he and Axel had finally managed to escape from the townspeople, Axel led the blond up to what Roxas' assumed was his house and led him into the garden.
"I've been dreaming," Axel began. Roxas groaned.
"Axel, if I hear one more song today I will murder a man," Roxas muttered as he tugged at his blond locks. The red-head had the gall to laugh before sitting next to the blond on the bench. "Seriously, can we just leave now?"
"I'd love to tell you yes but I get the feeling we didn't come to this lovely town by ourselves. Whoever put us here took our key," the writer confessed.
"Are you kidding with me right now?" Roxas asked. Axel shook his head 'no' and the younger man groaned. "Now what?"
"At this point the only thing we can do is to wait until the story has played out and hope that once the story is over the book will let us leave," the red-head told the blond.
"But we don't even know what story we're in!" The editor argued. "But I guess we don't have a choice," he sighed. "Well, come on." He stood and began walking to the house. Axel watched him with an amused expression. "Aren't you coming?" Roxas asked.
"Roxas, don't you know it's bad luck to see the bride before the wedding?" Axel asked. The blond immediately blushed but Axel took off running, laughter trailing behind him before the smaller man even thought to throw a punch at the smarmy bastard.
"Jerk," the blond muttered, slamming the door behind him for good measure. The fact that he had a tiny, amused grin on his face was completely beside the point.
Roxas stood in front of his oval mirror, staring at his reflection. He was dressed in a white tuxedo and while Mother Goose, an elderly woman with grey hair and small spectacles, fussed over the blond all Roxas could think of was, STAY AWAY FROM EVERYTHING SO IT STAYS CLEAN!
"Don't fuss, child!" Mother Goose told the blond – completely misinterpreting Roxas' nervousness. "The man utterly adores you!"
"What if it rains?" Roxas fretted, running to the window and peering out.
"But it's a bright sunny day!" Sylvester, Mother Goose's talking goose, told him.
"Suppose Axel forgets the ring?" Roxas told them. Seriously? He thought. You're supposed to be trying to find a way to get out of this story. Not worry about Axel forgetting the ring! Get it together, self!
"You mean Tom?" Mother Goose asked the blond. "Now Mary, don't be funny," she told Roxas. "Now let's see," she stated, going over Roxas' tuxedo once more. "There's something borrowed. Something blue..."
"Good day, friends!" A gentleman stated as he entered the house. The man was dressed in a dapper black tuxedo with a cape and top hat. His hair was slicked back and he had a small mustache.
"Gee, wonder who the antagonist is supposed to be in this story," Roxas muttered to himself.
"Ah, here's something old and ugly, too," Sylvester stated. Roxas decided he rather liked the talking goose.
"Ah, what a charming bride," the man stated as he walked into the living room. "The sweetest and loveliest I have ever seen."
"Why don't you come in and make yourself at home," Roxas told him dryly.
"May I offer you my best wishes for your future happiness?" the man asked.
"Uh, thank you, Mr..." the blond trailed off.
"Barnaby, you oily..." Sylvester began before Mother Goose shut his beak. The man, Barnaby, stalked over to Sylvester.
"For lunch, I had roast goose!" He told Sylvester before turning and walking back to Roxas.
"Would you please excuse us, we have so much to do." Roxas told him. It took every ounce of his good breeding but the blond managed a tight smile.
"Of course!" Mr. Barnaby told him happily. "Preparations for the wedding and," he paused to gasp. "What's that?" he ran to the window. Roxas sighed but followed after him. "Some small excitement." The blond crossed his arms as he watched a small boy lead two men to the entrance. "My word, two shipwrecked sailors," Mr. Barnaby told the blond. "Whatever are they doing here?" he wondered out loud. Roxas rolled his eyes at the man's obvious acting.
"I can't imagine," Roxas told him before sauntering out of the living room and onto the front porch of the cottage.
"My friend and I would like to know," the bigger man (in both height and girth) began, "Are you Miss Mary, Quite Contrary?" Roxas sighed.
"Yes, sir. I am...she," he rolled his eyes.
"Well," the man paused and wiped his brow. "We don't know how to tell you this, Miss Mary." He paused and looked at his comrade. "No, we don't know how to tell you this at all. We were twenty leagues at sea. It was as calm as it could be, when out of the north, there came a sudden squall. He was standing at the wheel, Miss Mary, and across the deck the mighty ocean roared. Then the mizzen broke and fell and we heard the fellow yell as it bashed him down and swept him overboard." The fellow nodded at his friend and they both began to dance as the man sang, "Slowly, slowly, he sank into the sea..."
"Oh, good God, is there going to be singing throughout this entire story?" Roxas whined.
"What preposterous rumor are you spreading, sailor?" Mr. Barnaby demanded as he pushed his way forward. Minions are accounted for, Roxas noted. "Go, on your way, unless...you have some evidence, some proof for what you say." The minion took his cue.
"Oh, yes, sir!" he agreed.
"What proof do you have?" Roxas asked in a monotonous voice. The smaller minion reached into the pocket of his over-sized red coat.
"We are bringing you his personal belongings," the larger minion told Roxas. "And in his hat we found this soggy note. Though the salty ocean spray somehow washed the words away, I'll see if I can't decipher what he wrote." The man took his spectacles from his smaller friend and began to 'read' the note. "'Darling, Mary,' he begins, or is that 'dearest'?" His smaller friend nodded. "Yes, that's the term he uses. We agree. Now, the boy goes on to tell how he hopes this finds you well, it's too bad he slowly sank into the sea." The man began singing again, and Roxas decided to just nip that in the bud.
"But this was supposed to be our wedding day. Why would...Tom...be at sea?" Roxas asked.
"Does this letter offer some explanation?" Mr. Barnaby demanded. "I presume he's written more..." Once again the minions took their cue.
"Oh, yes, sir! 'I am poor,' the letter reads. 'And can't support you and it's best I sail away and set you free. Noble lady that you are, you'd be better off, by far, if you were to marry wealthy Barnaby.'" The man began folding up the sopping wet 'letter'. "We advise you to forget him now, Miss Mary. Our condolences to you we do extend, but we'll blame you not, my dear, if you care to shed a tear for the way he met his most untimely end." The man once again began singing as his friend danced and Roxas tried not to roll his eyes as he walked away to 'weep' for his lost love.
"Gentle Mary," Mr. Barnaby stated as he joined the blond on the bench in the garden. "So grief stricken and remorseful, to see you thus is more than I can bear. Erase your sorrow now," Mr. Barnaby told the smaller man. "Be resourceful for yourself and those poor children in your care," he told the blond – referring to the five small children Roxas had somehow found himself in charge of. Roxas groaned and moved himself to a new bench. "Take advantage, my dear, of my infatuation!" Mr. Barnaby cried as he trailed after the blond. "May I point out; you are deeply in my debt? I could seize your home through legal confiscation!" Roxas glared at the slimy man. "I do hope you don't take that as a threat."
"How should I take it?" Roxas asked icily.
"Feast your eyes upon my mansion, tall and stately" Barnaby continued, ignoring Roxas' question and gesturing to a house far above town on a hill. "And imagine it a castle, dear, in Spain."
"Not like any castle I've ever seen," Roxas told him as he eyed the house. It looked more like a run-down haunted house amusement ride than anything else.
"Come my love," Barnaby told him. "For I'd admire it greatly that you be my queen," Roxas groaned, "and live in my domain!"
"No." Roxas told him as he pushed himself off the bench. Barnaby stepped over the bench and stood next to the blond.
"In our castle in Spain," he began singing as he threw an arm around the smaller man.
"Yeah, let's stop right there," Roxas told him as he shoved the older man's arm off of his shoulder. "I don't go for the whole song-and-dance routine. And certainly not with you. I'd never marry for money alone. Besides, even if...Tom...is gone, we can still carry on with the income from our sheep." When Barnaby snickered Roxas knew that the grease ball had done something to them and his suspicions were only proved correct when Bo-Peep came running into the garden.
"My sheep! My sheep! Our sheep," she cried. Roxas sighed and rose to meet the crying girl.
"Bo-Peep, what's the matter?" the blond asked, though he already knew what the little girl would say.
"Our sheep! They're lost!" the little girl cried.
"Oh no!" Roxas cried sarcastically. "They can't be lost. Have you looked in the fields?" he asked.
"Have you searched the hills?" Mother Goose asked.
"I've searched everywhere," Bo-Peep insisted. "My sheep are gone for good," the blond began to sing. Roxas sighed but decided it best to let the upset girl sing her song. The townspeople congregated about the small child and assured her that her sheep would be found. Roxas was suddenly ever-so-grateful for the annoying crowd. He definitely didn't want to marry Barnaby if he could help it – even if the marriage wouldn't actually count in the real world.
"Bo-Peep! Bo-Peep!" A little boy dressed in blue shouted.
"What is it, Bobby?" the shepherdess asked.
"I know where the sheep are!" he told his friend.
"You do?!" Bo-Peep exclaimed.
"Yes, I followed their tracks. Do you know where they led to? They led to the Forest of No Return." Bobby told her.
"The Forest of No Return!" the villagers exclaimed.
"Oh, that doesn't sound good," Roxas muttered. "Why do these stories always include a spooky forest? Just once I'd like there to be a pleasant, well-lit area involved." As Bo-Peep threw her arms around the blond the villagers dispersed. "Thank-you anyway, Bobby," Roxas told the little boy before he began leading his charge back into the cottage.
"Miss Mary," Mr. Barnaby called out. Roxas rolled his eyes but let Bo-Peep continue into the house before turning around and facing the older man. "Remember my offer. I'll be awaiting your decision, my dear," he told the blond with a smile. Roxas groaned before entering the cottage and quickly shutting the door behind him. His stomach churned in disgust but as he turned around and found his wards – two little boys and three little girls – looking to him for advice he knew he had to shake it off.
"Don't worry about a thing, we'll be alright," Roxas assured them. "Just get a good night's sleep. Come on, into bed with you all." As the two boys and the twin girls climbed into their bunk beds Roxas turned to Bo-Peep. "What's the matter?" he asked her.
"I'm so sorry I lost the sheep. And I know it's my fault," she told her guardian.
"Don't worry about the sheep. They'll find their way home," Roxas assured her. "You'll see. Get under the covers." Bo-Peep slid into bed and Roxas tucked her in before grabbing the lantern and saying good night. Sliding down the stairs the blond sat down at "his" desk to go over the figures of the houses finances. As he added up the totals he tugged his blond locks in distress. They'd need money for the house as soon as possible and as much as it disgusted him, Roxas could think of only one way to move the story forward. "Damn it, Axel, where are you?" he muttered before grabbing his coat and exiting the house.
"Friends," Barnaby told the collected townspeople. The people glared back, disgruntled at being woken up in the middle of the night. "You are gazing at a happy man. I'm about to take a bride. Tomorrow, this little lady will become Mrs. Barnaby," he told the crowd as he gestured for the person to join him. Roxas unwillingly joined Barnaby at the top of the steps.
"Mary!" the townspeople exclaimed. Roxas kept his eyes trained on the stones, his expression clearly unhappy even as Barnaby insisted that he was sure that they'd both be happy.
"To sing and dance and entertain you I have hired a band of gypsies." Barnaby continued, completely disregarding his bride's unhappiness and the townspeople's' anger. "I'm sure they'll brighten up this happy occasion. Ah! Here they come!" The people turned as three performers passed beneath the town's stone arch. The rest of the gypsy band quickly followed. Roxas watched miserably as the gypsies began their song and dance routine, only really paying attention once he was brought forward to have his fortune read by the fortune-teller.
"Your name, as I make out, is Mary. I see in your palm you're lonesome for Tom, crying over his obituary," Floretta, the fortune-teller, told Roxas. "But your darling Tom is alive!" she told Roxas. "Yes! And I can see much love and laughter."
"Don't play games with me, woman," Roxas hissed. The woman smiled at the smaller man.
"This line of your life shows that you'll be Tom's wife and forever live happily after," Floretta told him before turning to Barnaby and grabbing his hand. "Now this is the palm of a cad, a sly reprobate and a mean one. Corrupt and malicious, conniving and vicious, a scoundrel if ever I've seen one," the fortune-teller announced. "He seeks a young maid for his wife while plotting her sweetheart's abduction. The crimes he's involved in will one day be solved and result in his utter destruction." Floretta told the crowd. "Observe now, dear friends, and please try to stay calm. Goodbye to Floretta," the gypsy woman tossed away her wig and the scarf that had been covering it, "and hello to Tom," Axel finished as he tossed away the dress that had been covering his outfit.
"Ax- Tom!" Roxas cried, catching himself in time as he ran to his...not-his-boyfriend. Axel swept him up in a tight hug and the blond blatantly ignored the skipping of his heart, though he couldn't ignore the wide grin on his face. Looking around as the townspeople congratulated the young couple Roxas' heart sank as he realized that Barnaby had disappeared along with his two henchman. "So what happened?" he asked once he and Axel had finally gotten away from their adoring crowd.
"I guess Barnaby plotted to have those two thugs kidnap me and throw me into the sea in order to say I drowned. Instead, they figured they'd sell me to the gypsies, then go back and tell Barnaby that they'd thrown me in the ocean. They'd get their reward from Barnaby and thus get paid twice. Once the gypsies figured out what Barnaby had done, they agreed to help me."
"Well, I'm glad you're back," Roxas told him. "Oh, and I owe you this," he told the red-head, smiling shyly up at the writer before slugging him in the chest. "Never call me your wife again," he hissed as Axel rubbed the sore spot on his chest.
"Hey, look, it's a note," Axel told the blond before peeling it off the door of the cottage.
"Dear Sister Mary, Please do not marry, let that old Barnaby burn. We've gone with Bo-Peep to look for the sheep in the Forest of No Return!" Roxas read.
"Okay, seriously, does everything here have to be in rhyme?" Axel asked.
"I know! It's so annoying!" Roxas agreed. "We have to go after them," he told Axel, getting the two of them back on track.
"Into the Forest of No Return? Why can't there ever be something less creepy. Like, the Forest of Pleasant Strolls?" Axel asked. "My next book is totally going to have that."
"Okay, I'm in total agreement with you on this but we have to stay focused. Children. Creepy forest. Let's go!" Roxas cried. Both men ran as fast as they could to the Forest of No Return.
"Stay close," Axel warned as they went further and further into the woods. Both men lost track of time as they searched for the missing children. "Sh, do you hear that?" Axel finally asked.
"Quick, this way!" Roxas cried and the red-head quickly followed.
"Mary!" The five children cried as they threw their arms around the blond's waist.
"Thank goodness you're safe! We were so worried about you. Never do that again!" Roxas told them sternly. "Look who's here," he told them with a smile once they looked properly chastised.
"Tom!" The boy in red pajamas shouted as he raced to the red-head.
"Hello, Willie!" Axel grinned as he picked the young boy up. The writer soon found himself surrounded by adoring children all clamoring for his attention. "I'm fine," he assured them. "But what about you?"
"We're fine," Bo-Peep answered for everyone. "But we didn't find the sheep," she sulked.
"We'll worry about the sheep later. Right now we need to get you home," Roxas told the oldest child as he gave Little Boy Blue a hug.
"I think it's too dark to travel tonight," Axel told the blond with a frown. "We should settle right here for the evening and then we can look for the sheep in the morning."
"Oh, we can't leave anyway," Bo-Peep told the older men. "We're captured."
"You're what?" Axel asked.
"We're captured," Little Boy Blue repeated.
"The trees captured us," Willie told the red-head.
"The trees captured you? What trees?" Axel asked.
"All these trees," Bo-Peep told the writer as she gestured to the trees surrounding their clearing.
"I think they're just tired," Roxas told his...not-his-boyfriend. Axel nodded his agreement.
"Come on, let's look for a nice spot to settle down in until morning." He wandered around the clearing until he found an area with dense vegetation. "How about here?" he asked. The group settled down and Roxas was more than ready for sleep when the children began to sing about the trees. Roxas rubbed his temples as he and Axel tried to get the five children to sleep. They were barely settled in and sleeping before they were awoken.
"What's going on?" Axel cried as they were surrounded by living trees.
"See? We told you about these trees," Little Boy Blue told the red-head.
"What's the meaning of this – explain yourselves!" Axel ordered the trees.
"Well, he wants an explanation," one of the trees mocked.
"The explanation is that you are out of bounds," a second tree informed the man.
"These are restricted grounds."
"You are not supposed to be here!"
"Didn't you read the signs?"
"But...what are you going to do with us?" Roxas asked as he sheltered the twin girls.
"What will be done with you, the Toymaker will decide," one of the trees told the blond.
"The Toymaker?" Roxas asked.
"Naturally," a red tree responded. "You are on Toyland property."
"Toyland?" the children asked before jumping for joy.
"Settle down!" The trees ordered before beginning to sing.
"I'm never watching another musical again," Axel groused as he followed the children to Toyland, which turned out to be a castle in the middle of a lake. The children sprinted across the bridge and immediately began banging on the door so they could meet the Toymaker. "Closed for alterations," Axel told them, pointing to a sign. The children were disheartened but quickly bounced back as they began exploring the area around them. They discovered the Toymaker's room, which looked to have been abandoned for some time but they soon located the Toymaker and his assistant and watched through the window as the assistant gave the Toymaker a demonstration of his latest invention. The small group watched in astonishment as the automated machine spit out a doll before spitting out a toy boat. Astonishment soon turned to horror as the Toymaker overloaded the machine in his overzealousness to make toys for children and it exploded, destroying the assembly room.
"This is catastrophic," the Toymaker cried. "My goodness." As the Toymaker took in the mangled mess of what was his assembly room, horror flashed across his face. "I'm ruined, absolutely ruined. Grumio. Grumio! Grumio! Grumio!" He pulled back a piece of cloth that was hanging on a piece of metal. "Oh, there you are!" he cried as he found his disheveled assistant. "You are alone responsible for everything. Just you, and you alone," he told Grumio, completely ignoring the fact that it was his orders to the machine that had led to its catastrophic meltdown. "Uh, did you say that your invention was to make toys or to make noise?" he asked sarcastically. "Go! Get out of here! Go on! Go to your room and invent something to destroy yourself!" The Toymaker ordered before turning back to the room. "This is terrible," he muttered as Grumio left the room. Axel and Roxas grabbed the children and left the window.
"I beg your pardon, sir," Axel told the man as they entered the room.
"Why, who are you?" the Toymaker asked.
"Well, my name's...uh...Tom Piper and – "
"What are you doing here?" the Toymaker demanded before the red-head could get anything else out.
"We came to see you," one of the twin's told him. The Toymaker turned around and startled as he saw more people.
"Who are you?" he asked the girl.
"She's my sister," responded her twin.
"Well, you shouldn't be here! It's not right for children to see these toys until Christmas day! These are – " he cut off as he realized he was gesturing to a mess. "Well, we had a lot of toys around here, but as you can see – " he once again gestured to the mess before realizing he still had a toy tucked into his overalls. "This is the only toy in the whole factory that isn't broken." He said sadly.
"We're very sorry, Mr. Toymaker." Roxas told the elderly gentleman.
"Well, thank you. But what are you doing here?" he demanded.
"We're arrested," Willie told him.
"The trees told us to report to you," Little Boy Blue added.
"Well naturally you have to report to me!" the Toymaker told the younger boys. "Not only am I the head toymaker, I'm also the mayor of Toyland and Chief of Police."
"We noticed you have quite a problem, sir," Axel told the Toymaker. The Toymaker nodded.
"Yes, quite a problem," he agreed.
"Is there anything we can do to help?" Axel asked. The wall clock chimed before the Toymaker could say anything.
"Half-past October. The deadline near. The children will have no Merry Christmas," the Toymaker said sadly.
"Mr. Toymaker, we're strong and willing to work," Axel told him. "I think we'd make a fine assembly line."
"And we'd work day and night, wouldn't we, children?" Roxas asked. His question raised a chorus of 'yes'.
"Please, please let us help you," Bo-Peep begged.
"You want to work?" The Toymaker asked, clearly not believing his ears. "Nobody wants to work these days."
"Well, it's not automation but we've got our hands to use," Axel told him.
"Maybe I could try it," the Toymaker mused. "What have I got to lose? Alright, folks, I'll put you to work. I've been such a dope. As long as there are people, we should never give up hope." The children cheered but were quickly put to work clearing the assembly room. It took another song to get through making the toys but Roxas and Axel were willing to grin and bear it if it meant they got to go home. Finally, it was the end of the day and the older men got the children fed and into bed before returning to the toy room to make more toys.
"How much longer do you think we're going to be here?" Roxas asked. Axel shrugged. "Do you think we'll actually get married?" he asked the writer.
"Why? Would you mind?" Axel asked. Roxas bit his lip.
"Not as much as if I had to marry Barnaby," he teased the red-head. Axel laughed before turning back to the doll he was putting together. "The thought of marrying you is probably the least frightening thing I could think of," the blond told his companion. Axel grinned and pulled the blond into his arms but the moment was quickly ruined.
"I got it! I got it! I got it!" Grumio shouted as he ran into the assembly room. "Where's the Toymaker? Where's the Toymaker?"
"He's in his room. Asleep!" Axel told the assistant.
"I've got to show him my new invention!" Grumio shouted before running to the Toymaker's room. Axel and Roxas quickly followed. "Mr. Toymaker. Wake up, sir!" Grumio shouted.
"Don't shoot me!" Toymaker shouted as he caught sight of Grumio's invention.
"This is my new invention!" Grumio told him excitedly.
"What?" The Toymaker asked.
"My new invention," the assistant reiterated.
"This is another one of your inventions?" The Toymaker clarified.
"Yes," Grumio told him gleefully.
"Shoot me," the Toymaker told him before lying back down and pulling the covers up.
"Oh, please, sir. Wait a minute! This is a scientific triumph! It's a biochemical breakthrough! My new formula for toy-making is even better then automation!" He told the Toymaker excitedly.
"It's even better?" Toymaker clarified. "Good night."
"Let me demonstrate!" Grumio told him, dragging him away from his bed. "This really works. Get back. Get back." He ordered Axel and Roxas. "Please get back, this is very, very dangerous. Watch closely. Big chair," he stated, pointing to a table chair in the Toymaker's room before shooting it with his latest invention. "Toy chair," he stated after it had been shrunken.
"Poof. Just like that?" The Toymaker asked.
"Just like that," Grumio confirmed before demonstrating on the Toymaker's table.
"This is provocative. Give me that!" The Toymaker ordered, reaching for the gun.
"Careful, sir," Grumio told him, refusing to hand over his latest invention. "This is a very dangerous compound. Two molecular discharges will result in complete obliteration. Observe." He fired again at the toy chair and it completely disappeared.
"Yes, I see no way this could possibly go wrong," Roxas muttered to Axel. As if sensing the irony of the blond's statement, the Toymaker got ahold of Grumio's invention and began shrinking everything in his room.
"Tommy, isn't this a wonderful way of making toys?" The Toymaker asked Axel.
"Yes, sir, it's wonderful, but where are you going to get the big things to make the small things?" Axel asked. The Toymaker froze before turning to Grumio and asking his assistant the same question. When Grumio couldn't provide an answer the Toymaker immediately sent the boy to his room before tossing the so-called "Poof" gun out of his window. Axel and Roxas followed the dejected assistant out of the room before heading to their rooms.
"Good evening." Barnaby greeted as he came across Roxas preparing for bed.
"Mr. Barnaby! What are you doing here?" Roxas demanded as he felt a sinking sensation in his stomach.
"I've come for you, my dear," the older man told the blond with a grin.
"How dare you come into my room!" Roxas told the man before mentally groaning. This story was seriously beginning to affect his brain in strange ways. "Ax- Tom! Tom!" he shouted as he tried to push past the other man.
"No need to scream," Barnaby assured the blond as he pushed the younger man back. "Your little Tom is quite close by. And I do mean your very little Tom!" The man told the blond as he pulled a shrunken and tied up Axel out of his pocket. "I will now, at last, have your hand in marriage." Barnaby told Roxas. The smaller man glared at the slime ball before punching him in the face.
"Never, never, never!" he told Barnaby as he made a grab for Axel.
"May I remind you that just a little of this," he pulled out Grumio's "poof" gun and pointed it at Axel.
"Stop! Stop!" Roxas cried, tugging the gun away from Axel. "I'll do anything you say," he promised as he stared at Axel.
"No, Roxas!" Axel cried through his gag. Luckily Barnaby didn't hear him.
"Of course you will," he told Roxas soothingly. "Come, my dear." He chuckled. He led the blond to the assembly room where he pulled the shrunken Toymaker from the birdcage. His two henchmen were left in the cage and Roxas could only guess that there had been some kind of falling out between the minions and their master. The tied up Axel was left on the stand with the birdcage but Barnaby didn't bother placing him in the cage before he gestured for the Toymaker to begin the marriage ceremony.
"We are gathered here to witness this young lady," Roxas rolled his eyes, "making her first step towards unhappiness. She's gonna marry you," the Toymaker clarified, pointing to Barnaby.
"What?" Barnaby demanded.
"I was just trying to liven things up with a little humor," the Toymaker told him.
"Never mind the humor!" Barnaby ordered. "Perform the ceremony."
"We are gathered here to unite this man with this poor unfortunate girl, in marriage. Do you, Barnaby, take Mary to be your wedded wife, to keep her in sickness and adversity, in poverty, in tragedy, in disaster -"
"What are you doing?" Barnaby demanded.
"Well, I was just trying to talk you out of it," the Toymaker told him honestly.
"I'm warning you..." Barnaby told him.
"Do you take Mary to be your wedded wife?" The Toymaker asked.
"I do."
"You sure you don't want to think this over?" The Toymaker asked.
"I...do...not!" The villain growled.
"No, I can see that you don't," the Toymaker agreed. "Now, do you, uh..." The Toymaker climbed the book to double-check the name. "Do you, Mary, take this man to be your wedded husband?"
"I do," Roxas responded dully after a moment's hesitation.
"That's funny. I take him to be your grandfather," the Toymaker told the blond.
"Will you stop this infernal stalling? On with it! On with it!" Barnaby shouted, waving his cane as a threat.
"Oh for heaven's sake! Such a dreadful temper! I'm glad I'm not marrying you!" The Toymaker told the man. "Oh, I am marrying you but I'm marrying you to her," he clarified. Roxas was pretty sure that if somebody referred to him as a girl again he was going to destroy this world. "Now where was I?" the Toymaker asked.
"Would you hurry up?" Barnaby demanded. "I want to get married." The Toymaker caught sight of Axel making his escape and continued stalling as the red-head rounded up help.
"Now comes the good part," The Toymaker told Barnaby. "If there is anyone, any man, or any woman for that matter, who has good reason why this marriage should not take place, let him or her, whichever it is, let them speak or – "
"Stop!" Axel shouted. "You scoundrel, unhand that girl!" The red-head shouted. Roxas glared at the shrunken writer. Barnaby chuckled.
"Look who's run away to become a toy soldier," the older man sneered.
"Take cover, Mary!" Axel ordered. The blond immediately got out of firing range as the writer led the toy soldiers into battle. Barnaby at first did nothing but laugh as the toys began their assault but the amusement quickly wore off and he began fighting back, quickly taking out the toy soldiers.
"Now, for the toy general," he muttered, taking aim at the red-head.
"Leave him alone!" Roxas shouted, jumping on the man's back, knocking the toy cannon out of the older man's hands. Barnaby twisted and turned, finally managing to displace the blond, sending Roxas skidding along the floor.
"This is better," Barnaby stated as he picked up the "poof" gun. Roxas scrambled, picking up the toy cannon and firing it. The tiny cannon hit the gun, shattering the glass which housed the chemicals and shrinking Barnaby. The villain tried to make a run for it but Roxas had had quite enough of the man's schemes and locked him inside one of the many boxes lying around the assembly room.
"Mr. Toymaker, I've got it!" Grumio shouted as he barged into the room.
"Seriously?!" Roxas shouted. "Where were you twenty minutes ago?"
"Where's the Toymaker?" Grumio asked.
"Grumio, I'm down here!" The Toymaker shouted as he waved his arms.
"Well, sir, it looks like you need a shot of my restoring formula," the assistant told him. Once everyone was returned to their appropriate size – barring Barnaby, of course – they still had the task of cleaning up the mess that the toy battle had made. Not to mention the fact that they had to fix all the toys that had been destroyed.
"You know, do you think we'll ever actually get our wedding?" Axel asked as he set another toy on the assembly line.
"What do you want to marry me for anyway?" Roxas asked with a grin.
"So I can kiss you whenever I want," Axel told him cheekily. Roxas laughed but didn't move away when the red-head invaded his space. "Didn't anybody ever tell you that you're horribly formal about certain things?" The writer asked.
"So what if I am?" Roxas challenged. "Didn't anybody tell you that I'm worth it?" Axel laughed but his only response was to lean in for a kiss. The blond grinned and –
"Time to wake up!" Axel stated as he shook the smaller man awake. "Come on, Princess, I let you sleep as long as I could." Roxas groaned before flipping over and slugging the red-head as hard as he possibly could (which, he was ashamed to admit, wasn't very hard when he was hung-over).
"I'm so sick of people calling me a girl," he muttered.
"Who's calling you a girl? I mean, aside from me?" Axel asked.
"It was a dream," Roxas sighed. "Oh, that makes so much more sense now," the blond stated as he sat up slowly. Axel shot his hung-over...Roxas...an amused look before handing him the glass of whatever and painkillers. "I'm never drinking again if weird dreams like that is a side effect."
"What happened?" Axel asked, briefly wondering how long it would take him to weasel the story out of the blond. Roxas waived him off.
"Go write something," he ordered. "Wait, come here first," he stated, motioning the writer closer.
"What?" Axel asked, clambering onto the bed and leaning over towards his editor. Roxas gave him a quick, soft kiss before shoving him away.
"Now go write something," Roxas ordered before he curled back under the covers. Definitely never drinking again.
~Review~