Karamatsu did not understand the words that his youngest brother told him over the phone. They were all garbled and messy in between his cries.

"Ok I understand." Karamatsu said, "now can you go about it slooowwwly…"

"Stop being an idiot shitty-niisan and get your ass right here!" Karamatsu heard his youngest brother shout.

He smiled because he was just glad that Totty had stopped crying even for a bit.

"Got it."

The next morning, Karamatsu hurriedly packed his things while Chibita watched him. The smaller man followed him around the house as he picked up his things and stuffed them in his bag. He was just everywhere, trying to make sure he did not forget anything else.

"I thought you said that you needed to go away because it will ruin you and your brothers or something like that..."

Karamatsu's hand paused. He had feared this. The feeling of being left behind, being the last one out. He knew this was coming and that was why he had to move away, to escape that kind of mental torture and depression. He did escape it. He managed to run away and pretend to be a normal member of society; he kept failing at it but at least he had pulled himself up from that pit of despair. His older brother on the other hand...

"We already ruined each other whether I stay here or not." Karamatsu stood up and picked up his bag, "We destroyed him, Chibita. I failed to realize that what we were doing could drive him to this. I was so stupid and so insensitive. I was too naive and reliant on him that I was fooled by that grin he always wore around us."

Karamatsu opened the door. Chibita looked confused, he did not really know what was happening.

"I failed him. I destroyed him by failing as the second brother. By leaving him when he needed me to support him." Karamatsu continued with his words.

It was the same as when Karamatsu suddenly appeared in front of him that day. Whatever was happening in their house it must be very serious. It was not something free oden could fix. So Chibita, as their friend, just smiled and bid Karamatsu all the best.

.

.

.

Karamatsu watched Choromatsu stepped out of the cab. Karamatsu had been waiting in front of their house the whole morning.

Chromatsu was seated beside the driver and was the one who took care of the fare. He rushed to the door and opened to let the passengers behind him go out. Matsuyo went out first followed by Osomatsu that was assisted carefully by Todomatsu.

His brother looked dead tired. There were still dark circles around his puffy red eyes. His cheeks shrunk as his clothes looked baggier than before. He had lost some weight. He was awake but his eyes were on the floor the whole time with Todomatsu as his only support to stay up. The youngest struggled, technically just dragging Osomatsu with all his strength.

Karamatsu ran towards his brothers. He helped Todomatsu and assisted Osomatsu on the other side.

"Choromatsu, what happened?" He asked, his voice did not even attempt to mask his worry.

"Let's talk inside."

The whole family walked inside. One look at everyone's faces and he knew this would be a long talk.

Inside, the brothers sat at the table downstairs, while their mother stayed beside Osomatsu in the siblings' room.

Karamatsu listened quietly while Choromatsu talked. He told his older brother what he saw and heard when their mother called him. Today, they brought Osomatsu to the hospital for his checkup. Like Choromatsu expected, Osomatsu needed therapy. He was also given medications to calm him to sleep, vitamins and other drugs that Choromatsu had never heard before.

"So what are your plans now?" Karamatsu asked both his brothers.

"I moved back here. It's a bit further from my parttime job but it's ok. I also took the night shift so I can take care of oniisan in the morning." Todomatsu said quite cheerfully. He was obviously trying to lighten up the mood.

"I called Dr Dekapan and he said that Jyushimatsu is still out of town due to a job assignment. He'll be back after a few more days." Choromatsu added, "I had no idea how to contact Ichimatsu though."

Karamatsu nodded and shared his plans as well, "I can stay here too while I still continue job hunting. I still haven't landed a job yet but I hope to find something nearer."

Choromatsu nodded.

"How about you?"

"I think I'll resign for now and move back here. Osomatsu-niisan might need me."

Karamatsu furrowed his brows, "Totty'll be here in the morning and I'll be here during the rest of the day. You don't even have to move back in, even more resign."

"I understand. But I need to be here beside him especially when it was my fault in the first place… why... he's like this." The sentence was so hard to say with all the guilt building up in his throat.

Karamatsu eyed Choromatsu carefully. He did not like it. The way his younger brother hunched his back and bowed down, the burden looked heavy on his shoulders. The way his eyes looked worried and angry at himself. The way Choromatsu's frown seemed more heartbreaking than it was ever before.

Choromatsu always wanted to prove himself that he could be a better man, but when he did, Osomatsu just had to turn into something like that. What he did was not wrong, but all the repercussions had proved it otherwise.

All that. Karamatsu did not like it. His brother could not just give up like that. This was not his fault alone, so he would not let Choromatsu fall...not on his watch.

"Of course it's just so easy to say that you're doing this for your brother but in the end you're still running away." Karamatsu said quite strongly.

"I am not running away. I just… wanted to be here as well."

"And leave your job? And abandon everything you worked hard for? After gathering courage and finally having the strength to step out of your comfort zone and be independent… you're gonna crawl back in here again?"

"What do you want me to do?" Choromatsu barked back, "It's all my fault!"

"It isn't." Karamatsu said, standing up. "And being a NEET again won't solve anything. What's done is done. You can't just go back to being the old you again and expect Osomatsu to get better when he sees that. The only way to go is forward."

Choromatsu had stood up as well. "He needs me to be here !"

"Do not use Osomatsu as an excuse. It's not like you can't go forward without helping him. You can. If it's you… you really can !"

"Shut up. Just because Osomatsu-niisan is like that doesn't mean you have to start acting like an older brother and be responsible and shit."

"I am not starting to act like your older brother. I am your older brother."

Todomatsu also stood up, unable to take all of this. "Stop it you two!"

The two of them stopped and looked at Todomatsu who was shaking his fist in anger.

"Mom's up there and I bet she could hear you two." Todomatsu started his voice low and shaking. "Do you know how hard it is for her to see her eldest son like that and the next ones fighting like this? You two have no idea… none of us could ever know what she is feeling right now. So if you want to be of help... Stop. Fighting."

Karamatsu went back down to sit and Choromatsu followed. The two were quiet for a while and when they calmed down Todomatsu sat down as well.

"I won't resign, but I'll check up on you everyday and check on his therapist for details." Choromatsu accepted.

Karamatsu sighed. He did not know what to follow with that. Something that would let him know that he had calmed down and happy about how Choromatsu and Todomatsu were acting. He was proud of them, really proud of them.

He then felt a grin formed behind him… more like from upstairs. A playful grin that felt like he had missed for a thousand lifetimes already.

He knew what to do now.

"You two want to drink?"

Choromatsu and Todomatsu looked up. Choromatsu breathed out and airy laughed and Todomatsu smiled with a shrug.