They reached the ruined village an hour before the mid-day, as the sun was high in the blue sky. Long ago, it had been built by the humans, but they had deserted it when the mines – its main source of income – had caved in. It had been several decades ago, if not a century ; the abandoned houses were now starting to collapse and break down, and the roads were covered by tall grasses and thorny bushes. It was surrounded by mountain grasslands and high cliffs of grey stone, and in the far distance they could glimpse giant mountains topped with permanent snow. The entry of the mines had been barred with ropes and wooden beams, but they had started to rot and would easily be removed, if the Dwarves decided to start exploiting the mines again. Copper and iron was not as good as gold or jewels, as in Erebor, but it was better than nothing and if they were lucky it would be enough to earn them a decent life.
Thorin soon found the old smithy, and was pleased to see that its walls were still standing strong. This would be a good place to live, he reflected as he opened the old wooden door. It creaked on its rusty hinges. Each of his steps was sending up thick clouds of dust, and the air smelled stuffy, yet Thorin felt a shiver of excitement run down his back as he imagined himself working here, not as a mere blacksmith who busied himself with nails and horseshoes, but as a real master-armorer, like his father before him. It wasn't an easy trade to craft good weapons ; it required patience and precision and meticulousness, as well as hard physical work, but it was also better paid than nails and horseshoes. He would forge swords and axes and spearheads, and later sell them to the humans living down there in the valley.
He made a few more steps, and tripped over a block of stone. The wall that separated the smithy from the living quarters had collapsed. Repairing everything would not be easy, of course. They would need materials and equipment, and time. A lot of time.
But we are a hardy folk, and we can make it if we have to.
He kicked away a piece of rotten wood, then he heard soft footsteps behind him. Even before he turned around, he recognized Laurelin ; after so many years spent in her company, he knew her gait by heart and he would have recognized her anywhere. Her dress was covered in dust, and she had spiderwebs in her hair.
« Did you find a comfortable place for your grand-mother ? » He asked her.
No one would have expected the old woman to last so long. Every day during the journey to the Blue Mountains, the healers had said she would not survive another day, or another night, and every time she had proved them wrong by staying alive in spite of the sickness that devoured her from the inside. Her used and weary body refused to let go. She clung to life with surprising vigor.
« Begnar and Kuraìn helped me to get her down from the cart. » she replied, a worried look on her face. « We put her in a small house near the well. The roof is still good enough to provide shadow, since she can't take the sun anymore. And it may turn into a nice house for both of us, if we decide to settle here. And there's a garden, too. And several plum trees... »
Thorin smiled. He knew how much Laurelin loved eating sweet, juicy summer plums whenever she had the chance.
« Good, but... shouldn't you stay at her side ? She has more need of your company than me, hasn't she ? » he asked, worried.
« She's asleep. There's nothing more I can do for her, right now, except praying and hoping for a better future. »
Thorin took a step towards her. She was distressed and worried, and it was obvious she was barely just holding out. He almost hugged her, as he would have done with Dis if he had seen her so upset, but he didn't know how Laurelin would react. So he just looked intently at her, hoping she would understand how much he cared for her.
« I am sorry life is so hard for you. » he said softly. « You have endured many harsdships and terrible blows, these last years, and shed more tears than anyone should be allowed to shed. If there is anything I can do to make it a little bit less hard, just tell me and I will do my best to help you. » She nodded, but Thorin doubted she truly believed him. I hope she doesn't think I'm only saying this out of politeness. I hope she will truly reach out for me if things get too hard.
« A forge. » she said suddenly, to change the subject. Talking about her grand-mother always left her sad and dejected, and right now she needed to think about something less depressing. « You mean to live here ? »
« Yes, I suppose I will. It's not much, compared to the mighty forges of Erebor, but at least it will be mine. »
« Everything is so old... How long has this town been like that ? »
« Almost a hundred years, if the humans in the valley are to be believed. » Thorin answered. « Long enough, at least, for small tress to grow in the most unexpected places. » They had encountered a small birch tree with a trunk as thick as a grown man's forearm, growing on top of a roof, and a smaller one growing in a rusty hearth.
« You think we can make this place alive again ? » she asked wearily.
The journey to the Blue Mountains had been exhausting. They had crossed rivers and mountains, and they had suffered and endless winter followed by a wet, murky spring. Laurelin had barely slept more than a few hours each night between her duties to Thorin and caring for her grand-mother, she didn't have much time to rest. Underfed and neglected, her body had suffered during this umpteenth wandering. She had lost weight, and the skin of her face and arms had turned red and dry from being exposed too long to sun, wind and cold. Thorin had seen the changes, of course, and he greatly admired Laurelin's fortitude the first time he had seen her, shortly after the fall of Erebor, he had mistaken her for a frail and fragile little thing, a little dove whose wings would break at the first difficulty - but during the journey to the Blue Mountains she had proved time and time again that she was tougher than he had expected her to be.
« I don't know, but it's worth trying, don't you think ? » he asked her, curious to hear her opinion about all this.
« Yes, it will be good to stop running. » she admitted. « I think we are all tired of travelling. We all need to see the end of this journey. »
« I'm going to see what's upstairs. » he told her. « To check the roof, and try to find out what creatures are nesting up there. I heard their tiny footsteps over my head, earlier, while I was exloring the ground floor. Rats, I bet. Or maybe wild cats, or a marten. »
Whatever it was, Thorin would have to get rid of them, one way or another.
« I'm going to fetch water at the river, for my grand-mother. » Laurelin said, looking suspiciously at the ceiling. « The well is dry and empty, but there's a small lake nearby. Do you want me to fill your flask, while I am there ? Harul said it's the purest and freshest water he's drank in his whole life. »
« Well, it can't be worse than the river we have crossed yesterday, can it ? » Thorin joked, as he remembered the yellowish stream springing out of the rocks. It had been stinking of sulfur, so disgusting that even the hardy mountain goats had refused to drink it. He unfastened the leather tie that bound the flask to his belt, and handed it to Laurelin. « A bit of water would be very welcome indeed. Thank you, Laurelin. »
She took the flask.
« Are you sure it is safe to climb up there ? » she asked, looking warily at the staircase. It was made of wood, and some parts were rotten, while other parts were full of holes where the wood-eating insects had carved their galleries.
« Don't worry for me. » he said confidently. « I will be careful. »
She watched as he climbed the five first steps, then she walked away, leaving Thorin alone. He reached the top of the stairs without any problem. Upstairs, he saw no living animals, but lots of dust everywhere, and mouse droppings on the floor, and moth eaten curtains. One of the windows was broken, allowing brambles and ivy to crawl inside the bedroom. Everything was very old and very sad. The people who used to live here had left in all haste, leaving behind most of their possessions. Thorin wondered what they would say if they saw the Dwarves settling into their houses. Would they be angry ? Would they call us thieves ? Or would they be happy to see that life was back between the deserted walls of the village ?
Thorin had no answers, so he just closed his eyes and prayed.
Let this be the first day of a glorious era for Durin's folk, please. Let it be the beginning of a better life for all of us.
Laurelin had barely left Thorin when she encountered Dis and her sons. She greeted the lady and bowed respectfully, and smiled at the little boys. Fili was running about, his long golden hair flying wildly around his face as he tried to catch butterflies. He had a strong, cheerful laughter, and every day he looked more like his father. He stopped running only long enough to greet Laurelin politely. The young maid greeted him back with a soft and gentle smile.
« Young Master Fili... »
Then the young boy was off again, slashing at invisible Orcs with an old stick.
Little Kili was still soft and chubby in his mother's arms. He smiled at Laurelin, showing his four baby teeth, then he burst into happy giggles as she stroked his cheeks with the tip of her fingers. Laurelin's smile broadened when she heard that wonderful sound, and her heart melted.
« They are both so cute and cheerful. » she commented, as she watched them with fondness in her eyes. Since Laurelin was an only daughter, she never had to watch over younger siblings, and she had never been around young children, but she enjoyed being in their presence.
« One day you'll have children of your own, and then you will realize that they are in fact little monsters. » the Lady Dis joked, as she tousled Kili's dark hair with a tender look on her face. « They look like angels, but they are real little devils in disguise, aren't you ? » Dis tickled her youngest son, till he screamed in delight.
Laurelin smiled again, but this time it was only just a polite smile, even a bit sad.
Fili, realizing that his little brother was getting more attention than him, stood between Laurelin and his mother.
« Look, I've killed the nasty Orc ! » he bellowed, before hitting his own head with the stick. Laurelin saw him tear up, but even at his young age he was already too proud to cry in front of everybody. He sniffed once, twice, then he rubbed away his tears and acted as if nothing had happened, but his face remained sullen. Instinctively, Laurelin felt the urge to stroke his head or give him a comforting hug, but of course she refrained herself in spite of his young age, Fili was a member of the royal family – as well as Thorin's heir. Master Balin had told her that as long as Thorin would remain unwed and childless, Fili was on top of the line of succession.
He was a future king, and Laurelin no more than a servant.
« Fee ! » Kili yelled in a shrill voice, wriggling in his mother's arms till she yielded and put him on the ground. He made a few awkward steps, then he tripped over his own feet and fell into Fili's open arms.
« I will be glad when they are a bit older. » the Lady Dis confided Laurelin. « They need constant attention, and it's exhausting to watch over them all the time... There are just so many things to do every day, so many chores, but I just can't concentrate on anything because I have to keep an eye on them, all the time... If I don't, it only takes them a few minutes to get into some mischief, or to put themsleves in danger. »
She sighed wearily, and shook her head.
Laurelin offered her a sympathetic smile. She remembered that Dis was alone to raise her sons. She had lost her beloved husband, yet she had found the strength to keep going. And she still had to work, too, to earn enough money to feed her family, yet in spite of that Laurelin had never seen her cry, or whine, or ask for help. Laurelin greatly admired her for her courage and fortitude.
« If you need help with the boys, my Lady, I would be glad to help. » Laurelin suggested, listening only to her heart and not to her reason, because in all honesty she did not know where she could possibly find the time to accomplish even more work.
« Oh, that's so nice of you, Laurelin, but I know how hard your life already is. » Dis replied with a warm smile. « Working for my brother and taking care of your grand-mother with such devotion is more than enough. Asking anything more of you would be cruel. And don't worry for me. I've learned to manage my household alone. » she added, with a certain pride. Then she turned around, to her sons. « Come on, boys ! Let's go and see what your Uncle Thorin is about ! »
They both screamed enthusiastically, and Fili ran inside the forge like a lightning bolt. Kili tried to catch up with him on his chubby, clumsy legs, but he lost his balance and fell face-first onto the grass. Unhurt, he giggled and rolled himself in the high grass. Dis picked him up, and entered the forge with him.
Laurelin smiled at no one in particular, and while she knelt on the rocky shore of the lake to fill her goatskins – as well as Thorin's flask – her mind wandered over to a time in the future when she would have her own children. She tried to imagine what they would look like, and how she would love them more than anything else in the world... Boys or girls, it wouldn't matter. But then she remembered her own childhood, her own life, and her smile turned bitter. What could she possibly offer her children ? A life of hard work and servitude, as she – and her parents before her – had known ? Spending their lives in somebody else's service ? Never a quiet day to rest or to enjoy themselves ? She plunged the flask into the icy cold water, and saw goose-bumps cover her bare arms.
No, she reflected. In spite of her deep desire to bear children and to be a mother, she was wise enough to understand it wouldn't be a good idea.
I refuse to bring children into this world, only to see them suffer the same pains and hardships I have suffered.
When Thorin heard children laughing downstairs, he recognized his nephews at once, and he climbed down the stairs to greet them. Fili was prodding a big black spider with his stick, and Kili was wobbling on his tiny legs ; he had taken his first steps a few weeks ago, during the journey, and now he was using his newly acquired talent to explore the world around him. He was curious and afraid of nothing, and never tired of running after his big brother. Dis herself looked as exhausted as anybody, after this long journey, but Thorin thought she was looking better now than she ever had since her husband's death.
« A smithy. » she said, smiling as she looked around. « So, you'll take up Father's trade ? »
« He was the best armourer of Erebor. »
« And now you will be the best armourer of... » She frowned. « Well, what's the name of this place ? »
Thorin shrugged.
« We have time to decide. It's not exactly the most urgent question. »
Dis caught Kili just in time before he banged his head against the corner of a working bench. She lifted him up in her arms again he screamed and kicked to be put back on his feet, but he calmed down instantly when his mother frowned at him.
« All the others are pretty enthusiastic, too. » she said.
« And you ? »
« I can only agree with them. » she answered. « Having a place to call our own will be a relief, aftrer all these years of sharing lives with filthy and unsavory humans. »
There was a short silence.
« This house is big. There are half a dozen of rooms upstairs. Enough for you and the boys, if you want to. » Thorin already knew his sister would say no, but he still felt it was his duty as an elder brother to ask it. Dis straightened up ad if he had insulted her, and there was a sharp edge to her words when she replied :
« I can take of my own family. I do not need to depend on anyone for our living, Thorin. »
He smiled at the look of wounded pride on her face, amused by her quick temper.
« Yes, little sister, I know you don't need anybody. » he snorted, then he was suddenly serious again. « But we are all that's left of our family, you and I - and your boys. We need to stick together. »
Dis softened up.
« Of course we do. And I will always be there for you if you need me, just like you will always be there for me if I need it. But that doesn't mean we have to cling to each other like a barnacle to the hull of a ship, does it ? »
They exchanged a smile of complicity.
« No, we don't have to cling to each other. » Thorin admitted, relieved. They both had a strong temper, and they would have been bound to clash every now and then if they had shared the same roof.
« Besides, you have Laurelin at your side to take care of you. » the Dwarf-woman added. Her smile tunred mischievous. « Aren't you happy, now, that I made you hire her ? »
« She's the most loyal servant anybody could hope to find. » he responded, a bit annoyed, as usual when he had to admit his sister had been right about something. It tickled his pride.
« Of course she is. » Dis mused, and her smile widened. There was definitely something impish in her voice, but Thorin didn't lose any time trying to understand what was going through her mind. Dis was a strange creature, after all.
But in truth, in spite of what Thorin had told his sister, his relationship with Laurelin was far more than just master and servant. She had become a true friend during the voyage, even if they had not spend much time together, whith Laurelin travelling at her grand-mother's side.
One of Thorin's fondest memories, during those endless months of wandering, was that one night when he had found Laurelin sitting apart from the main camp, all alone. Everybody else had been asleep already, but the young main had been watching the stars. There had been such melancholy on her soft, round face that Thorin had felt his heart melt. He had joined her under the stars. They had not talked much, that night, but they had both enjoyed each other's presence, and when they had left to sleep at last, Thorin had realized it had somehow brought them closer. Then, a few weeks later, as autumn had just turned into winter, Thorin had spotted Laurelin cuddling with his little bay pony. He had asked her if she wanted to ride him. First she had refused – most Dwarves went by foot or with giant goats, or maybe a pig or a big dog to pull the carts, but horses were a privilege – but Thorin had insisted and in the end Laurelin had accepted his offer. She had looked a bit ill at ease, during the first moments, but the pony she was feeding every day, as well as Thorin's reassuring presence at her side, leading the pony by the reins, had helped her to relax and to enjoy the experience. Thorin had been happy to see her smile, for once, as she talked to the pony in a childish voice, as if she were addressing a very small child. Thorin had noticed how pretty her smile was, and wondered with dread how long it would take for other men to notice it as well – it made her eyes sparkle as if somebody had lit a candle in them. And it had been good, too, to see her having fun. She had even laughed, that day – something that Thorin had not heard very often, during her years in his service. A sweet laughter, and after that Thorin had felt the urge to make her laugh again and again. The following days and weeks, he had sought her presence more and more often, because her laughter made him forget his own grief too.
Thorin smiled as he remembered it all, but Dis' worried look brought him back to reality.
« I can't see Fili anywhere. » she said, annoyed. « I bet he's gotten into trouble again, as usual. I swear to you, Thorin, these two will be the death of me. »
« You love them, Dis. » Thorin reminded her warmly.
« Yes, I do. » she admitted, smiling adoringly at her youngest.
In truth, Thorin liked them well enough, too. Well, Kili was still a bit too small – Thorin was always afraid to hurt him, with his big rough hands – but Fili was starting to get very interesting. He was full of energy and enthusiasm, but also strong-willed like a true heir of Durin. Thorin had shared a few good moments with him, during the journey since the boy had no father, he now looked up at his uncle, and Thorin was proud to have a part in Fili's life. The bond they were sharing was growing stronger by the day.
Dis strode away to look for her son, with Kili still in her arms. Thorin was left alone. Dust was dancing gracefully in a ray of sunlight.
He closed his eyes, and tried to imagine what this place would look like once it would be restored. In his mind, it looked very appealing. He had never wanted something as badly as he wanted this now.
It's the home we've all been craving for, for so long !
When Laurelin walked back from the lake, carrying an armful of goatskins and flasks, she was hit by a blond tornado and almost dropped everything. She recognized Fili at once. His hair was messy, with twigs and dead leaves entangled in his braids, and his cheeks were red from running. His hands were covered in slimy brown mud, and Laurelin didn't even want to know where he had stuck them.
The boy's smile died when he realized he had almost knocked down his uncle's maid.
« Sorry. » he muttered meekly, lowering his head.
« It doesn't matter, little scoundrel. » she said with a smile, before chuckling at his stricken face. She softly ruffled his hair. « Where's your mother ? » she asked, looking around, but she saw the Lady Dis nowhere.
« With Uncle Thorin. » Fili said in a small voice.
« And why did you not stay with her, then ? » Laurelin asked him gently, kneeling to be at eye level with him. She had spoken softly, yet the boy had taken her words for a rebuke and tears filled his big blue eyes.
Laurelin smiled reassuringly at him, and stroked his cheek.
« Come with me, young Master Fili. » she said. « Your mother must be worried for you, don't you think ? Are we going to find her together, you and me ? »
Fili nodded without a word, then he held out his hand. Laurelin grabbed it immediately, without caring for the mud on it.
The look on relief on Dis' face as she saw her son in safe hands was the proof that she had indeed benn very worried for him.
« By Mahal, Fili, what were you thinking ? Running of like that, without even a word ? Do you know how afraid I was ? » she scolded him sternly. Then she softened up when she saw tears rolling down his cheeks. She sighed. « It's all right, sweetheart. Don't cry, now. Don't cry. I was worried for you, little one. What if something bad had happened to you ? » She kissed him on his wet cheek, then she gave him a long hug. While the child was crying in her shoulder, she looked up at Laurelin. « Thank you. » she said gratefully. « I don't know how to thank you, Laurelin. »
« You don't have to thank me. » Laurelin replied, bowing respecfully. « It's only natural. »
« No, dear, I owe you. And I won't forget it. »
She released her eldest son, and stood up again. Then she nodded at Laurelin, gave the maid one last smile, and walked away with her boys. Fili turned around and waved Laurelin good-bye, his eyes still red from crying.
Laurelin lifted her own hand, smiled warmly at him and, then she entered the forge.
Thorin was still upstairs.
« My King ? » she called tentatively, looking up at the ceiling and wondering what creatures were lurking in the shadows upstairs. « I am back with your flask, if you want to drink. I put it on the table. »
A moment later, Thorin climbed down the stairs. They creaked under his weight, but they were obviously stronger than they looked.
« Thank you, Laurelin. » he said, rubbing the dust from his face with his sleeve.
« Your nephew Fili is a lively little lad... » she said, smiling.
« Yes, he is. » Thorin chuckled. « A bit too lively for Dis' taste, sometimes. Within a few years, he'll start learning to ride ponies, and to wield a sword. Once day he'll be a proud warrior, just like his father – and his mother. »
« Will you teach him ? »
« Yes, probably. And Dwalin, too. And maybe Glafur, too. »
« I have to leave you, now. » she said politely. « I have to see if my grand-mother needs me. Call for me if you need me, my King, and if you don't, I will be back this evening to prepare dinner. »
Thorin nodded slowly.
Laurelin bowed, and then she left the forge.