Thorin was spotted as soon as he entered the village. At first only a few curious men and women came out of their houses to greet him and ask him about his quest they had noticed Thrain's absence, of course, so most of them also offered him their condolences. But soon there was a whole crowd gathered around Thorin, each of them eager to exchange a few words with their king. Walking became harder and harder, and Thorin's frustration grew with every minute. As pleased as he was to be back home and to be greeted by his folk with such enthusiasm, it's Laurelin he wanted to see right now. And she was probably at Balin's home right now, at the opposite side of the village. It would take him forever to go there, if his people kept holding him down.
Gently but firmly, he shouldered his way through the Dwarves swarming around him. He kept repeating he would talk to each of them later, when he would be rested from his long journey, but most of them were too stubborn to move away.
When Thorin reached Balin's home at last, he knocked loudly on the door. It was Balin himself who opened the door. The old Dwarf looed up anxiously at Thorin, who shook his head slowly in response to the other Dwarf's silent question. Balin's face fell. Sadness filled his eyes.
« We will talk about this later, if you don't mind. » Thorin said in a deep, sad voice.
Balin nodded silently, and moved away to let Thorin enter into the house. As usual, everything was neat and well-ordered, and the walls were covered with shelves containing hundreds of books and scrolls. It smelled of ink and old parchment. The sun was shining into the house through the windows, bathing the main room with light and warmth.
Just as Thorin was about to ask Balin where Laurelin was, she entered into the room from the backdoor. When she saw Thorin, at first she froze and studied him for a few moments, as if wondering if he was real or if it was merely a vision. Thorin watched her as she stood there in the middle of the room, looking utterly confused in her old blue dress, with her hair braided back and an old scroll of parchment in her ink-stained hands. Being so close to her again, after their long separation, was feeling so good he felt his throat tighten with emotion.
She is beautiful... He realized, wondering why he had never quite seen it before.
Laurelin's face was unusually smooth, yet it was pleasant to look at she had big brown eyes framed with black lashes, and a pretty smile, and a scatter of soft golden freckles across her nose and her cheeks. Her features were both soft and delicate. Her hair was light brown, but in the light of the sun it now shone with beautiful reddish hues.
And then suddenly, without a warning, Laurelin ran to Thorin and wrapped him in a fierce hug. Never before had she taken the initiative to hug him – or touch him in any way – but now she was so happy so see him again that she had lost all sense of modesty or restraint. She allowed herself to give free rein to her happiness.
Surprised by this unexpected hug, Thorin closed his arms around her nonetheless, and held her close for a long while, enjoying her closeness and her happiness. He couldn't help but smile. He may have lost a father, but at least he still had Laurelin, and somehow this knowledge eased the pain he was feeling every time he lingered on Thrain's fate. He rubbed Laurelin's back very softly, very gently. Balin was watching them with a puzzled look on his face, and other Dwarves were standing outside, peering through the windows in the hope of seeing what was happening inside.
« Laurelin... » Thorin whispered into her ear. His voice was deep, and hoarse with emotion. « It's so good to see you again... How are you ? »
« I am fine, my King. » She said in a reassuring voice. « I am fine. » Her broad, merry smile was the very proof she was telling the truth. « Thank you for the letters... Thank you so much... They did me so much good, my King. It was a relief for me to get some news from you from time to time, even if it pained me to be unable to write back any answers... »
Thorin let go of Laurelin, and contemplated her once more. It made his heart melt to see her so happy. He knew it had probably been hard for her to be on her own, but as he watched her now he realized he had worried in vain. She had managed on her own well enough. Instead of crying and sinking into self-pity, she had seen Thorin's absence as an opportunity to try out something new, and to take in hand her own life. It had done her good to do something else than working in the forge, even if it had only been for a few months. The change he saw in Laurelin was subtle, yet unmistakable : she had gained in confidence and maturity, and it pleased Thorin to see her like that. Her eyes were shining with emotion.
He took her small hands in his own.
« I am so sorry I left you alone, but... »
« …but you had to, » she finished for him, and she knotted her fingers around Thorin's. « I know it, and I can understand. You don't owe me any apologies. And I... I am terribly sorry you didn't find your father. I know how hard it is... I wish... I wish there was something I could do to lessen your pain... »
« Let's not talk about this right now. » he suggested, chasing away the despair that threatened to overwhelm him once more. « I want to focus only on happiness, now. » Then he looked at the curious people who were standing outside of the house. Some of them had their noses pressed against the glass panels of the windows. « What about finding a quiet place ? » he asked Laurelin. « So you can tell me about everything that happened here while I was away. And about everything you did during my absence, too. I want to hear even the most insignificant details. »
Laurelin nodded. He had been away so long, but now he was back and she was more than happy to be able to spend a bit of time alone with him.
But she didn't forget Balin.
« May I leave my work for a few moments ? » she asked, always curteous and polite.
« Of course. » the old Dward answered, with his usual kind smile.
Thorin and Laurelin walked away from Balin's house, while the old Dwarf shooed away the bothersome onlookers.
Since Balin's home was located at the border of the village, they didn't have to walk for a very long time to reach a quiet, lonely place it was a small alpine meadow in full blossom, bathed in warm sunlight. Grey granite rocks were jutting out of the ground here and there, and in the light of the sun they were glittering as if they were strewn with diamond dust. In the far distance, a herd of ibex was grazing in the shadows of the mountain. Thorin and Laurelin sat into the high grass, side by side. Soon, they were surronded by pretty butterflies with transparent wings who were flying from flower to flower, looking for sweet nectar. Laurelin couldn't have imagined a more idyllic place to talk with Thorin.
She started by telling him everything of notice that had happened in the village during his absence, like the birth of a pair of twin boys, or the miners' strike for higher wages, or the death of an old dwarf called Rakhandùr. It took her a long while, because she wanted to be as thorough as possible. She wanted Thorin to know he couls rely on her.
« And you ? » the King asked, when her voice died down at last. « What about you ? »
Knowing what she had done during his absence was far more important to him, for now, than anything else in the world.
So Laurelin told himl everything about her long days at Balin's home, about the books she had read and copied, and about all the things she had learned in the process. When she was done, silence fell between them, but it was a comfortable silence. Laurelin was aware of Thorin's presence so close to her. It made her feel slightly dizzy after having been deprived of him for so long.
Then, after a while, she started biting her lips, wondering whether to tell him or not the real reason why she had been so worried. Part of her was afraid to open up like that, but another part was eager for Thorin to know what she had truly gfelt when she had been alone.
« My King, there's something I want to tell you. » she started. He stared at her at once, looking intrigued. He smiled to encourage her. Laurelin took a deep breath and continued. « While you were gone... I was so worried you would not come back... I was worried you might find another place somewhere... or another person... someone who could take care of you better than me, or a more comfortable home, or... » she sighed. « I was afraid you would completely forget about me, and never come back. »
He took her hand in his once more, and squeezed it very tenderly.
« Laurelin... how could I ever forget about you ? » he said, with a warm smile and a glint of pure tenderness in his eyes. « When you mean so much to me ? I never realized it before I left the Blue Mountains. I appreciated you, of course. And I loved every moment we spent together... But then suddenly I was alone on the roads, and... and as much as I was worried for my father, most evenings it's you that I saw when I closed my eyes... I missed your smile, and your voice, and your kindness... I missed your presence... » He paused, then he lifted his free hand ias if to stroke her cheek, before letting it fall down into the grass again. He wanted to toucher her, and at the same time he was afraid to do so. « I missed you more than I thought it was possible to miss somebody, Laurelin. You say you were worried that I forget about you, but in truth you were in my thoughts every single day. Killing a whole legion of Orcs with bare hands would have been an easier task than forgetting about you. »
Laurelin was deeply moved by his words. She suddenly felt as is a weigh had been removed from her chest, allwoing her to breathe freely for the first time in a very long time. Tears rolled down her soft and smooth cheeks. She looked up at Thorin, and did what he had been too frightened to do : she lifted her hand and touched his cheek. It was very soft, no more than the tip of her fingers brushing over his rough skin, but it made Thorin shiver from head to toe.
« As much as I am sad that I didn't find my father, the fact that I am now reunited with you makes the grief easier to bear. Being with you, and feeling your presence so close to mine, is like a balm for my wounded heart. » His voice was deep and hoarse with emotion as he savoured Laurelin's gentle touch. Slowly, he relaxed and dropped the walls he had had to keep around himself during those six months of travelling.
In the end, he found the courage to remove his hand from Laurelin's and to touch her face as well, as he had been craving for earlier. He touched her as softly as if she were a porcelaine doll.
« I missed you too... my King. » she said with a smile, barely able to believe that Thorin was touching her with such tenderness.
Thorin's smile grew wider in response to her words.
« I am sorry I put you through this. » he said with genuine sorrow. « But now I am back, and we are reunited at last. I don't think I will ever leave your side again, my sweet Laurelin. » His voice was warm and kind and friendly as he said those words for the very first time, even though he was actually quite surprised. He had not meant to say those words they had just poured out of him, very naturally, as if his heart and soul had spoken through his lips in complete disregard of Thorin's usual sense of restraint.
Laurelin felt goose-bumps stand on the skin of her arms as he felt a rush of emotion wash over her. Never before had she felt so alive, so happy.
A few moments later, they walked back to the village together. As they passed in front of Balin's home, Thorin forned, suddenly worried.
« So you enjoyed working for Balin, didn't you ? » he asked, looking at Laurelin. « Then maybe... Maybe you want to keep working with him, now ? Maybe the work there is more pleasant for you than working at the forge ? » He looked at Laurelin's ink-stained fingers. « If such is your desire, you can be sure I will not resent you for choosing to leave my service. I would miss your presence at the forge, of course, but I totally encourage you to do what you
love best. »
« Oh yes, I loved working for Master Balin, » Laurelin replied heartily. « But I love working for you even more, my King. I would never leave your service unless I have no other choice. »
Thorin smiled, relieved. The propsect of seeing her leave him alone at the forge had been a dreadful one, even though he would have done nothing to hold her back from doing what was making her truly happy.
They reached the first intersection.
Two hours later, Laurelin and Lady Dis were sitting together at a small table of wrought iron, in Dis flowered backyard. They were sipping hot tea and eating cinnamon cake, while Thorin was sparring against his nephews with padded blades, to be sure they would not hurt each other. It was currently Fili's turn to fight Thorin. The young blond Dwarf was now a fierce warrior, and giving his uncle a hard time he was using two swords, one in each hand, which gave him a clear advantage. But Thorin had more experience, and more power behind each of his blows. He was slowly getting the upper hand over his eldest nephew.
« I hate to see them fight each other. » Dis admitted. « Not because I am afraid they will hurt each other, but because it reminds me of how dangerous our world is. » She sighed, and drank a gulp of tea. « If the world out there would not be so dangerous, there would be no need for them to learn fighting like that. I can't... Everytime I see them with swords in their hands, it reminds me that some day they might have to use them for real... » Her dark eyes suddenly turned very sad. « I lost my husband long ago, but I survived because I had to, for the sake of my sons. But if I lost Fili and Kili too... »
She shook her head and didn't continue, for these thoughts were too terrifying to be
uttered aloud.
« I am sorry for your loss. » Laurelin said politely, and she truly meant it. Losing her husband so shortly after the birth of their second son must have been a terrible blow, yet Dis had never complained, nor casked anything of anybody. Strong and independant, she had built herself and her sons a good life, juste like Thorin had.
« Oh, forget it, I don't want to ruin your happiness. » Dis continued. Her smiled reappeared as her eyes went from her brother to Laurelin. « It's pretty obvious you are delighted to see him back, and it makes me happy to know he didn't come home to a cold empty house, so please don't let my dark mood tarnish your joy. »
« Of course I am happy he's back. » she said. « I've been working for him for so many years. It will be reassuring to resume my familiar work and to share my daily life with him again, as we did before. Even though... » She felt suddenly a bit ill at ease. « I am sorry he couldn't find his father... your father... You have all my condolences, Lady Dis. »
She shrugged, and bit her lower lip.
« The day Thorin left, I already knew he would find nothing. Either our father was truly dead, like everybody seems to believe, or he was alive but permanently lost to us. Too much time had passed. All the tracks had disappeared long ago. My brother is stubborn and strong-willed, and once he has an idea in his head no one can make him see reason... But I am not like him. I knew from the beginning – and I told him so – that this quest would be a waste of time, so I never truly had any hope... It... Of course it hurt when Thorin came back empty-handed, but it didn't hurt as much as if I had had any hopes... » She sighed heavily, but then her smile reappeared. There was something mischievous about her, suddenly, as she looked at Laurelin. « So you are reassured that Thorin is back... but to me it looks like you are more than just reassured, aren't you ? »
Laurelin blushed and Dis chuckled softly, but in a friendly way.
« And it's not only you, of course. » The lady continued. « It's my brother, too. He's different. The way he looks at you... I don't know what exactly he feels for you, but I just know there is something. » She paused, and then she studied Laurelin's face. « It reminds me of our younger days, before the fall of Erebor. As if he had cast away some of the grief and resentment that plagued him since Smaug's attack. As if... » She thought about it, then smiled again. « As if he was more carefree, all of a sudden... And less burdened... I don't know how this miracle could happen, exactly, but I can clearly see you have something to do with it... ? »
Laurelin was aware that Dis wanted to know more about it, but she resolutely decided to keep everything private. She didn't resent Dis for asking – curiosity being a naturel feeling, after all – but on the other hand it was none of Dis' business.
« I am sorry, my Lady. » Laurelin started, but before she could add anything else Dis laughed again. She had a loud, cheerful laughter, juste like her youngest son Kili. Laurelin couldn't help but smile in spite of her embarrassment.
« Don't apologize. » Dis said, before biting into her piece of cake. « I am the one that should apologize, for being so nosy. I won't bother you again, I promise. » But then suddenly all the mirth disappeared from her face, and she frowned. « But you know, Laurelin... Other people talk, too. Many of them have seen your reunion with Thorin, earlier today. They started talking as soon as you left Balin's house with my brother. I was there. I listened to what they said. »
Laurelin felt her heart beat slightly faster. She didn't like the idea that people were gossiping about her, or about the relationship between her and Thorin.
« And... what exactly are they saying, my Lady ? » Laurelin asked tentatively. She was not even sure she wanted to hear the answer.
« Most people were harmless enough. » she said, looking intently at Laurelin. She didn't want to hurt the younger woman, but she was also a very straightforward woman, and sometimes people felt offended by her brutal honesty. Since Laurelin seemed to count so much for her brother, she didn't want to do or say something that might hurt her in any way. « They say it's wonderful to see their mighty king so attached to a... mere serving girl. » Dis had hesitated on the last words. Calling her a serving girl when she was so obviously more than that felt uncalled-for. « They say it's the proof of our King's kindness and humility. Not like the kings of old, who revelled in their superiority and treated others like witless, worthless good-for-nothing. But there are other rumors, too. Some people were smiling as they said there is something like unavowed love between you and my brother. They seemed to find it amusing or touching enough. » Then Dis lowered her voice, and leaned closer to Laurelin. When she poke again, her voice was low so that no one else could hear what she would say. « Some people said you're actually sleeping with my brother. That he's only keeping you at his side for this reason. Because you are pretty and... » Dis cleared her throat, looking embarrassed. « I'm sorry. It's not what I think, of course. I'm merely repating what I heard. Since you are concerned by these rumors, I think you need to know. »
Laurelin was so shocked that she didn't know what to say. She was not the kind of woman to listen to gossip, and most often she always avoided to spend time with women who liked to talk behind the back of other people.
And then something else hit her :
If Dis has heard such tales, did Thorin hear them too ?
This thought was enough to frighten her. She didn't want people to have a bad opinion on him because of her of course she had always done her best to act like a decent woman, and to give them no reason to gossip about her, but obviously it had not been enough. And she didn't want Thorin to think she had said or done anything during his absence to lead people to such conclusions.
« Laurelin, if I have one advice to give you, it is this one : don't listen to such filth. » Lady Dis said with conviction. « Let them talk. They're no more than idiots, anyway, if they are stupid enough to spread such tales. We all know this, don't we ? And Thorin knows it too. He will never blame you for the twisted ideas these unsavoury dwarves may have about you. Let them talk and act as if you didn't hear them, because if you let them bother you, they will take it as the proof that they are right about it, and this is the last thing you want, isn't it ? »
Knowing that Lady Dis, at least, was convinced these ugly tales were no more but lies comforted Laurelin and made her feel better. She didn't know what exactly there was between Thorin and her, - because she had never experiences anything like that – but she knew there was absolutely nothing shameful about it. It pained her that some people had come to the wrong conclusions after watching her reunion with Thorin, and that these people had turned their friendship and tenderness into something digusting.
Dis patted Laurelin on the forearm.
« They will forget about it as soon as something more interesting will happen in the village, you can be sure of that. » she said comfortingly.
They were interrupted by Fili's shout as one of his swords flew out of his hands. Kili yelled in dismay, too, while Thorin glared triumphantly at them both. He was tall and fierce and strong, and sweat was now covering his brow.
« One day you may beat me with a sword, Fili, but it's not today. » he said with a friendly smiled, before patting both his nephews on their backs. « Come on, let's go and find you mother, now, before she takes up her own sword and beats us all. »
Both young Dwarves chuckled, and next moment they all sat at the table. Fili and Kili were rowdy and loud and exuberant, and Thorin's hand instinctively came to rest on Laurelin's.
Dis watched them for a while, her eyes going from one to another as if trying to guess what was going on between them. She didn't say a word, though, but the soft and discreet smile that stretched her fuzzy lips was enough for Laurelin to understand she accepted it, or maybe even rejoiced about it.