Author's Note:

I am SO sorry for taking so long to update; I've been extremely sick:( But, I hope this makes up for it:) And, hopefully, I'll be posting Part 2 later today, and I'll do my shoutouts then:) So, this is just a quick thank you for your reviews and your patience!

WARNING::

Contains sensitive material & possible triggers!

The chatter in the cafeteria was almost deafening, as per usual, when Cordelia went to sit at the table with her friends, the young leader trailing behind, awkwardly. The dark-haired girl slid onto the bench, and Eric didn't hesitate to scoot in beside her. Uriah, Violet, Sassy and Marc, all stared at the blonde, apprehensively, sharing nervous glances.

Lia noticed their discomfort, and frowned, with her head tilted to the side, in confusion. "What's up with you guys?"

They all shifted uncomfortably in their seats, but it was Uriah who decided to speak up. "Why are you sitting with us, Sir?" the dark-skinned boy questioned, directing his query at the blue-eyed instructor.

Eric forced himself to remain his cool composure, as he pulled out his pad and pen from his back pocket, and scribbling over the paper quickly.

The Dauntless-born boy shifted his eyes over to the Candor transfer, before he accepted the yellow note from the blonde, and read it aloud for his friends to hear. "'I like to check up on my initiates, Pedrad'" he read the neat script written on the small paper. "Um... okay?"

The young leader nodded, once, in his direction, before smirking at Lia beside him. He had forgotten how much Zeke and his brother looked alike, although while Zeke was smart, and reliable, Uriah was a clown, who liked to goof off. But, they both had the same, blinding-white smile, which he noticed the dark-skinned boy was currently aiming at Cordelia.

"Wanna go up to the roof of Administration after lunch?" Uriah inquired of his friends, though his gaze was on the amber-eyed girl, and it caused the young leader to scowl at him; he knew what they were going to do. Eric had never smoked before, and while it was legal at Dauntless, he just never felt compelled to experiment with the readily available plant.

"Definitely!" Lia exclaimed, happily, causing the blonde to frown at her choice. "I like weed!"

Her admission caused giggling among her friends, with the exception of the purple-haired girl. Violet hadn't touched her food, and appeared pale, and sallow. She seemed to have developed a permanent frown over the past few days. "Guys, I'm really worried about Todd."

Eric felt Cordelia stiffen beside him, and the smile fell from her face, as her leg began to bounce up and down, in anxiety.

"It's really important that I talk to him, and I haven't seen him since the first day of break," Violet continued, twiddling her thumbs together, where her hands rested on the table in front of her. "I don't know if he's avoiding me, or-."

"Quiet!"

All chatter disappeared, and every head turned to the balcony above the dining hall, as Max stood above them with his arms clasped together behind him, a serious look on his dark face.

"As some of you know, two of our initiates have been 'missing' for a few days," the Dauntless leader began, gazing out over the crowd before him.

Cordelia noticed the way Violet's breathing changed, and the way the purple-haired girl began to tremble; this was not going to be pretty. The dark-haired girl knew that this would happen at some point, but it didn't make it any less awkward for her, and it didn't make her feel any less guilty, that her friend had tried to kill her, and had himself died in the process.

"One of our initiates was attacked three nights ago, but luckily one of our own was able to intervene in time. Donnie was one of the three initiates that participated in the attack, and as you are aware, he was made factionless when the cuts for stage one were made," the dark-skinned leader paused, judging the reactions from the members below him. He held up his hand to silence the whispers that had started at the disturbing revelation.

"As for the other two boys," he continued, with a sigh, and a heavy heart. "We had to contact the first of kin before we could break the news, and their parents were on the fence at the time, but have since returned. Grey was killed, attempting to retaliate, and Todd jumped into the Chasm, rather than face being made factionless."

Eric had forgotten that Todd was Lia's friend's boyfriend, and he couldn't help but feel bad for the purple-haired girl; it wasn't her fault.

Violet hung her head, and started sobbing, Sassy and Uriah hurrying to console her. "This isn't happening!" she cried, causing a sense of deja vu to pass through the blonde leader, as he watched the Dauntless-born girl fall apart. "This can't happen! What am I supposed to do?! How am I gonna-? I can't-, without him!"

Lia felt like she was going to be sick, and she was sure that if she were to look in a mirror, her face would be yellow right now. Eric sensed her nervous state, and squeezed her hand gently, under the table. "Violet, I am so sorry," she started, quietly, a pained expression crossing her delicate features. "Is there anything I can do?"

The Amity boy knew, in that moment, that it was Lia who had been attacked by the other boys. It didn't take a genius to put two and two together, and their friends all looked at her with different emotions displayed on their faces. Marc felt uneasy at the venomous snarl that the purple-haired girl released.

"It was you, wasn't it?" Violet accused, pointing at the dark-haired girl, while holding her stomach with her free hand. "Why didn't you say anything?!"

Lia noticed the low growl that Eric emitted, but she ignored him as she fumbled for an explanation. "She hates me."

"I wanted to tell you," Cordelia admitted, as tears started to flow from her amber eyes. "I just didn't know how! I didn't want you guys to hate me, or be angry with me!" She was trembling, and she could tell that her behavior had bothered the young leader, but he remained silent.

"Hate you?" Violet asked, incredulously, shaking her head, as her expression changed from violent to gentle. She sighed deeply, and closed her eyes, briefly. "It's not your fault, Lia. If Todd attacked you, then we all know why. It hurts that he's gone, because I'm-, I mean, he had no right to do what he did," the purple-haired girl finished, quietly, as she slumped her shoulders. "If he hadn't died, I would've broken up with him over that; he was a coward."

"I'm so sorry I didn't tell you," Cordelia stressed, ashamed that she had allowed her friend to find out this way. "What can I do to help? Please, I need to do something."

The dark-haired girl was begging, and Eric didn't approve; the attack had not been her fault, and she didn't owe anybody, anything. He noticed the purple-haired girl shifting around uncomfortably in her seat, and he waited to hear what she would request.

"There's something I need to tell you guys," Violet started, awkwardly, opting to stare at the table in front of her. "It's what I needed to tell Todd... I-, I'm-, I mean, we-."

Lia reached across the table, grabbing the purple-haired girl's hands in her own, and squeezed gently, encouraging her friend to continue.

Violet squeezed her eyes shut, and scrunched her face. "I'm pregnant."

"What?!" Sassy and Lia exclaimed, in unison, flapping their hands in the air. Eric noticed that Uriah and Marc shared his expression, one of awkwardness and slight disgust. Teen pregnancies weren't uncommon in their city, but most of them were due to 'free-love' in Amity, as most of the other factions instilled the importance of birth-control in their children, and Abnegation didn't allow any physical contact between unmarried people of the opposite sex.

The purple-haired girl held a finger to her lips, shushing her friends, and ordering quiet. "Guys, please, I don't want my dad to know yet, and if all of Dauntless finds out, then he'll find out!"

"Okay, okay," Lia conceded, offering an apologetic smile. "Are you going to go through with it?" She felt Eric's stare on the side of her head, but she brushed it off; this was Violet's choice, certainly not his.

"Of course I am," the purple-haired girl stated, slightly offended at the insenuation. She noticed how the young leader, who sat beside her Candor friend, seemed to relax at her words. "I couldn't do anything like that, ya' know? It's a baby. It's a part of me."

"Sorry," the dark-haired girl offered, with a shrug. "I just meant, that no one would blame you if you didn't want to go through with it. If I was in your situation, I wouldn't want it."

"Lia!" Marc scolded, angered at the harsh words of the amber-eyed girl.

Cordelia noticed the frowns that she received from her friends, and Eric seemed upset, to say the least; no one was on her side. She still found it amazing how the people of Dauntless, including herself, could switch through so many different issues and feelings so quickly.

This had all started off with grieving Todd, and somehow ended up with Lia confessing her stance on pro-choice, and everyone being angry with her.

"What?" she demanded, crossing her arms, and huffing in annoyance. "I'm Candor, get used to it! And all I'm saying is, I wouldn't want to put my child through the pains of growing up without a dad. I had a friend-... Eric?"

The blonde instructor had stood up, looming over the dark-haired girl with a scowl on his face. He pressed his lips into a thin line, and shook his head, before storming away up the stairs.

"What was that about?" Uriah asked nobody in particular, glancing between his friends, as they watched the young leader stalk away angrily.

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO

Cordelia took the stairs three at a time, as she ran after the blue-eyed man. She didn't know what had made him so angry, but she knew it must have been her fault. She sprinted down the corridor that led to the young leader's apartment, and banged on the door, before trying the knob. It was locked.

Lia growled in frustration, as she turned and ran towards the training center. Eric wasn't in the training room. The dark-haired girl hurried up the stairs that led to the roof, and she expected to see the blonde-instructor leaning against the rail, but he wasn't there, either.

She sighed, in exasperation. "Where did you go?"

The Candor transfer resigned to seek out the brown-haired instructor, instead, and made her way through the halls towards the Pit. Four was there, talking to a small group of people, off to the side near the bar. She approached slowly, not wanting to disturb the other man in his free time.

"Something wrong?" he asked, when he noticed the amber-eyed girl standing awkwardly off to the side.

Lia bit her lip, and nodded her head, in confirmation. "Yeah, can I talk to you for a minute?" She scuffed the toe of her boot into the floor, as she stared at her feet.

Tobias found her behavior odd, and crossed his arms as he excused himself from his friends. He placed a hand, gently, between the Candor transfer's shoulder blades, as he guided her back into the corridor. "Now, tell me what's going on?"

Cordelia quickly explained what had happened, and her concern that the young leader was nowhere to be found. She also inquired if Four had any idea why the blonde had reacted that way.

"No, I honestly don't. But, I do know how we can find him," Tobias informed the dark-haired girl, gesturing for her to follow him. He led the way through the winding halls, all the way to the control room, where he worked when he wasn't training initiates.

"Take a seat," he gestured to the swivel chair beside him, as he took his own seat in front of the wall of monitors. Cordelia complied, quickly, and he showed her how to switch through the screens that captured almost every corner of the Dauntless compound.

"Check through the common areas, first," he explained, as he set to work flipping through the images that showed the roofs of the faction.

Lia did as instructed, not finding the blonde on any of the screens, and she sighed, in frustration, as she threw her head back.

"There!" Four announced, pointing to the monitor in front of him, with a grin, but his smile quickly fell. "He's... he's in the fear training room?"

The dark-haired girl leaned over to look, and sure enough, Eric was pacing back and forth in front of the doors to the simulation rooms. She watched intently, as the young leader apparently screamed, and punched the wall, before throwing open the door on the left, and storming inside.

Four stood quickly, and ran down the hall, Lia following closely at his heels. They weren't far from the simulation rooms, so it didn't take but a few minutes, before Tobias was throwing open the door to the room that Eric had entered.

The young leader was already under the simulation, his eyes moving rapidly under his closed eyelids. The only other movements that he made were his facial expressions, and to jump slightly, ever so often.

Cordelia and Four moved to watch the screen, and the dark-haired girl felt like they were intruding, but she couldn't help but be curious about the mysterious instructor's fears, and she wanted to catch him before he left, afterwards.

"He's on the last one, it won't take long," Four assured the Candor transfer, as they watched the young leader on the monitor.

"Hello?" Eric called out, in the simulation, as he reached his hands out to feel his surroundings. Lia could tell that he was in some sort of a wooden box, and that it was very dark. She also found it interesting that in this fear, Eric didn't have a stutter.

"Somebody get me out of here!" the young leader screamed, as he apparently panicked at his situation. Cordelia watched, with intrigue, as the blonde began to kick out at the wooden top, and eventually broke through the wood. Black dirt started to rain down on top of him, but he pushed through the surface, regardless, and pulled himself out of the ground. The dark-haired girl could tell that he had been in a coffin, in the ground, and she expected to see Eric sit up any moment now, as he was now above ground, gasping for air, in the simulation.

"It's changed," Four whispered, from beside Lia, throwing a glance at the young leader lying in the chair. "He's not done, yet."

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO

As soon as Eric stood up from the broken ground where he had dug his way out of his grave, he was standing on a ledge above the Pit, and all eyes were on him. He turned his head to the right, to see Max standing there, with his arms folded, as he glared at him.

"Eric," he said, inclining his head towards the waiting crowd. "Don't embarrass me. You know what you have to do."

The blonde swallowed thickly, as he turned to glance out over the waiting sea of faces, once again. He didn't know what he was supposed to do, so he turned to look at Max again, raising an eyebrow in question.

"Eric, don't make me say this again," the dark-skinned leader threatened, taking a step closer to the blue-eyed man. He dropped his voice to a low growl, as he continued. "Silence isn't useful, Eric."

The blonde's icy-blue orbs went wide, with fear, at what his superior was suggesting. He wanted him to speak; to expose himself in front of all of Dauntless.

The young leader shook his head, slowly, and Max took another intimidating step towards him. "Eric-... Maddy?"

That made Eric turn around quickly, his eyes going wide when he took in the state of his fiance.

The willowly girl had the same short, pink hair that he remembered, and her green eyes released fat tears that trailed down her cheeks. Her mocha complexion was slightly pale, and her hands were covered in blood.

The blonde was so concerned about Maddy, that he let his guard down to express his concern. He rushed over to her, fear in his eyes, as his blue orbs searched his fiance's. He grabbed her wrists, gently, and scrutinized the red, sticky substance.

"W- w- what, what h- happened, happened?"

The dark-skinned girl's face twisted in disgust, and Eric knew he had made a mistake.

"Roland got shot," she scoffed, pushing away from the blonde, roughly. "You're retarded, aren't you?"

A loud chorus of laughter reached the young leader's ears, and he turned to see everyone in the Pit pointing, and laughing at him.

Eric set his mouth in a thin line, a scowl on his face. "N- n- no."

SWITCH-SWITCH-SWITCH

"Eric! Eric! Guess what?!"

The young leader had been sitting on his couch, reading a book, when his fiance burst through the door with a wide grin on her face. He stood, quickly, and opened his arms to catch Maddy when she ran towards him. He embraced her, lovingly, before pulling back to raise a pierced eyebrow at her in question.

"We're having a baby!" she squealed in delight, as she started jumping up and down.

Eric's eyes had gone wide, before his face broke out into an expression of pure joy. He grabbed the mocha-skinned girl by the waist, picking her up, and spinning her around before setting her back on her feet, and kissing her, sweetly.

There was a knock on the door, then, and he offered his fiance an apologetic smile, before going to answer it.

Cobra was stood in his doorway, with a grim expression on his face. "Eric, Maddy, I've got some bad news," he informed the happy couple, as the young leader moved aside to allow him entry. "There's no easy way to say this, so I'll just say it, and leave you two alone."

The older man took a deep breath, and sighed. "Eric, your tests came back, and it's not what we thought. You've got a Chronic Subdural Hematoma, which basically means a brain hemorhage. And there's not going to be anything I can do."

"What?" Maddy spoke up, with wide eyes, as she shook her head. "What the hell does that mean?"

"Eric-... it means that you're going to die. I don't know when, but these things can change overnight. Some people have gone twenty years with your condition, some, only a few minutes. I'm sorry."

The young leader didn't notice when the doctor left, as he shared a long, sorrowful glance with the love of his life. He noticed when her expression changed, and it scared him. It terrified him.

"Eric, I-... I don't think I can do this," Maddy whispered, dropping her arms loosely by her sides. "I can't watch you die. I-... I'm sorry, Eric."
Eric could only stare at the place his fiance had been previously standing, as she hurried past him and out the door. He was in shock.

SWITCH-SWITCH-SWITCH

Eric walked into the salon, slowly, and tentatively approached his ex-fiance. He reached in his back pocket to pull out his pad and pen, and he quickly scribbled his message to the mocha-skinned girl: I just wanted to make sure you were okay. How's the baby?

The pink-haired girl read the note, and sighed, deeply. "Eric, I couldn't do it. I couldn't do that by myself."

The blonde raised his eyebrow in question, a sense of dread washing over his body in waves, as his breathing picked up, and Maddy disappeared, and in her place stood Lia.

"Eric, I had it terminated. I didn't want it growing up without a father, and I-... I just couldn't do it," the dark-haired girl informed him, bluntly.

The blue-eyed man swallowed thickly, his heart picking up speed, as it thumped in his ears. He didn't stand around to hear anymore. Eric bolted out of the salon, and ran through the Pit to the stairs, sprinting the rest of the way to his apartment.

He dropped to the floor on his knees once he was inside, finally allowing the tears to fall. He screamed in despair, and anger, and proceeded to tear his home apart.

He flipped the couch, and threw a lamp through the window, before he pushed his bookshelf over, the many different manuscripts falling to the floor before being covered by the wooden shelf. He ripped the pictures of him and Maddy off the walls, before he stomped on them with booted feet. With a cry of anguish, Eric threw all of his dishes against the wall, the porcelain shattering to pieces and falling to the floor.

That's when it hit him.

He dropped to the floor again, only this time, it was the searing pain in his head that caused him to do so. He held his head in his hands, and fought to keep consciousness as the excruciating pain threatened to steal his vision, as bright spots danced in front of his eyes.

It didn't last long, but it was more than enough.

When it was over, he broke down, sobbing on the floor. He didn't understand how Maddy could leave him for why she did, and even more confusing, was how she could willingly kill their unborn child because of him.

The young leader picked himself up off the floor, and stalked, determinedly, to his bathroom. He stared at his reflection in the mirror with a look of disgust, before opening the medicine cabinet. The blue-eyed man pulled out a box with several, long blades; razor blades.

He heard a knock on the door, and then Lauryn's voice calling out to him. "Eric? Eric? It's Lauryn, can you open up?"

The blonde didn't waste anymore time, he simply held one of the blades firmly in his right hand, and dragged it down the length of his forearm, before repeating the action on the other arm. He threw the bloody razor blade in the sink, and watched as the blood pulsed out of his veins, his vision fading, and his breathing labored.

He felt himself falling, and he could hear the front door open, before he heard Lauryn's frantic words near his head. "Eric? Eric?! Wake up! Oh my God! Help!"