Chapter 2: Everything is Embarrassing
Caitlin
When the electric blue light splits the world apart and blossoms before our eyes out of nowhere, it startles me so much that I drop my chopsticks on the floor and almost choke on my veggie lo mein. An unusually boring afternoon in the lab just got a welcome jolt of excitement!
"Whoa, what the what?" Cisco inquires of the universe as two figures leap from the breach between worlds. It's Jessie…and Harrison Wells. I stand, wipe my shaking fingers with a napkin that I crumple in a brief release of frantic tension. I plaster a big, welcoming smile on my face.
Cisco frowns, and at the same time that I begin a warm greeting, he demands to know, "Didn't you say we had to stop opening these breaches, or we risk damaging…you know, everything? Everywhere?"
Wells does a double-take at Cisco's question and seems to avoid my eyes (or is it just my imagination?), smoothly replying, "I feel like you weren't always this grumpy, Ramone. I mean, grumpy is supposed to be my whole thing. And it's nice to see you again, too."
Jessie shrugs the whole thing off and strides forward to give us all a hug. Barry and Joe come walking in and join in the love-fest, foisting unwanted hugs on Harry as well.
"Ramone," Wells explains, evading a back-clap from Barry with hilarious precision, "I was going to get my breath back before I explained this to you, but given your gloomy proclamations, you might find it reassuring to know that I've developed a safer and cleaner way to create breaches when they're needed for extreme situations."
"If we didn't need your help for a really good reason, we wouldn't be here," Jessie adds, like it's so obvious.
Thanks, Jessie, I figured that one out. I'm sure if Wally happened to be in the room, he'd be super-flattered by her remark as well. Jeez, this situation is adding barbed edges to my thoughts here, there, and everywhere! Get a handle on yourself, Caitlin!
H.R. comes in with a drumstick in one hand and his ubiquitous coffee in the other, simply stating, "Hey Handsome!" to his doppelganger with his typical sprightly, anything-goes demeanor that couldn't be more different from Harrison's cautious, suspicious, serious nature. Yet, I've seen flashes and glimmers of the vulnerable, funny, affectionate, hopeful side to my Wells that I wish I could see more of.
My Wells? Oh boy, I'd better quit this line of thinking before my face turns beet red. I brush one finger casually against my hot cheek with an icy finger and flinch. Too late. I'm definitely blushing. But I can get past this, right?
Just don't think about that stuff when Wells is around!
I toss my hair slightly, trying to build my confidence back up to a normal level as I casually ask, "So, clean breaches, huh? That could have some seriously beneficial applications. How do you open one up?"
Now he has to look at me, so he does, and with one locking of our eyes, every single romantic or sexual thought I've ever had about Harrison Wells comes flickering back across my mind so fast and furious that I feel my cheeks go from hot to fiery. It's a welcome break from feeling cold all the time, but its cause is definitely awkward as can be.
"Uh," he replies, stepping closer and brandishing a shiny new remote control device I've never seen, "it has to do with adjusting the — you know, let me tell you guys about the breaches later. If we don't get control over the meta wreaking havoc back in our Star City, there might not be a Star City to get back to."
"Got it," I reply, and it comes out terse and cold. I didn't mean it to. There she is again. Killer Frost.
Wells
What am I doing? I didn't even hug her when we came back just now. I hugged everyone else except Ramone, who seems quite prickly of late, and sure, the hugs were forced on me, and I'm not even a goddamned hugger. I had a chance to get my arms around Caitlin Snow again, but now it's gone. And she seems to be avoiding my gaze every time I let it "casually" rest on her and make myself yank it away before it seems to stay on her too long. Why?
It's like she's more interested in breach technology than me, and why shouldn't she be? There's nothing but simple friendship and comradery between us, of course. Everywhere except in my own twisted mind.
I wrest control of my uncharacteristic mess of nerves and get back on task. Canvassing ideas with Jessie and Caitlin, we come to a much better, more efficient solution for subduing our fiery foe.
Jessie is all gung ho immediately about going back to try out the device, and though I prepare to go with her, she stops me. "No, Dad, stay for a while. Be with your friends. I got this."
It's almost like she sees right through every hidden wish I've got, which would be really, really, really bad, and I'm glad she's just concerned about my total lack of a life back on Earth 2. These people on Earth 1, maybe they'd never have become my friends if crazy happenstance hadn't thrust us together, but now they feel like family, and this feels like home in a lot of ways it logically shouldn't. I don't want to leave…I wonder if I ever want to leave.
I mutter to Jessie, out of the others' earshot, "They don't need me. You do."
"That's where you're wrong, Dad," she assures me with a smirk, matching my quiet tone. "They do need you, and guess what? You need them too. Come back when you're ready, if you're ready. We can go back and forth more often now. Who knows how much you can perfect this new breach technology? Maybe you can work on that with Caitlin and Cisco while you're here!"
I play it like the idea of perfecting my newest invention is the real motivation for sticking around and watch Jessie return home with continued amazement at her casual confidence and near-flawless understanding of the personal and the emotional, two aspects of life that have always baffled me.
"Glad to have you with us a little longer," Barry says warmly. "We're all headed to Jitters, why don't you come with? Iris will be happy to see you, too."
"I'll be there in a bit," I reply with a tight smile. Out of the corner of my eye, I'd just glimpsed something that gave me pause. They all leave, but luckily, she's the last to make her departure. I touch her shoulder lightly to get her to stay.
Caitlin
I don't jump through the roof, and for that, I respect myself for the first time since I saw him again. "Can I talk to you?" Wells asks the question in a low, sexy voice that gives me more jitters than a thousand trips to our favorite local coffee shop.
"Yeah," I say with a shrug, "What's up?"
He leads me to a couple of chairs, his expression serious, pondering something. Surprising me again, he touches my wrist, turning it slightly in his hand.
"What's going on with the bracelets? And that's not all, I saw something, some kind of power…emitting from your fingers a minute ago. Whatever it is the bracelets are meant to be suppressing, it's slipping through."
Oh, my God. My life has enough dramatic irony and situational metaphor to power a romance novel or two. Yeah, something I'm trying to suppress is showing anyway, alright. That, and the ice powers, too.
"Things've changed since the last time we saw each other," I explain, looking down at our hands, his fingers still lightly examining the bracelet, running downward to touch my palm, all the way to my fingertips until my whole body is tingling from wishing he'd never stop touching me.
"I've got the same powers as my Earth 2 self, Killer Frost," I explain, as he says her name in unison with me.
"But you never exhibited powers after the particle accelerator explosion," Wells says, perplexed.
"Flashpoint," I explain grimly, alluding to the changes caused to so many lives by Barry's alteration of the timeline.
"And you can't control the powers," Harrison guesses, based on the bracelets I'm wearing. I nod.
"They're extremely potent. They take over my whole self, until I can't even control my need to use them to get whatever I want. The powers almost seem to lock into my Id, whatever impulses give them the opportunity to come out. I gave into them once, a while back, and caused a lot of trouble." I'm still sheepish at the memory. "After that, I put these back on for good. We've been trying to find a way to get rid of, or at least control, the powers without these, but so far, nothing."
"Who's we?" Wells leans back in his chair, releasing his hold on me and propping his chin in his hand.
"Me, my mom, Cisco, everyone…"
"Except me," he adds with an arrogant smile tinged with knowledge of his own ego's ridiculous extents.
"Well, I couldn't exactly consult you about it, what with the whole, we live in two different worlds thing and all," I answer matter-of-factly, and he leans forward again.
"Maybe you couldn't before, but I'm here now, and Caitlin—" His way-too-bright, far too beautiful blue eyes shine with purpose and some variation of affection I can't quite figure out. "You and me are going to figure this out."