More of a Jean and Lucien chapter than a Li one.
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Jean lay in her bed unable to sleep. It had not been much of a conversation with Lucien in the surgery but it had had a profound effect on her. She had long had feelings for him that went beyond the bounds of those for one's employer and now they were engaged, after months of pussy-footing about each other, it was ridiculous. She loved him, he loved her, gossip was rife; she wanted to say, 'to hell with the lot of them', and would have, if not for the fact that his daughter was now in the house.
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Lucien lay awake, staring into the half light afforded him by the slightly opened curtains. He was happy his daughter had come to him, delighted that the enigmatic Jean had agreed to be his wife but he replayed the scene in the surgery over and over again. He hadn't meant to make a lewd comment and the twinkle in Jean's eyes had shown she had not taken it as such. Did she really think the same as him? They were neither of them silly teenagers experimenting with their emotions. They were middle aged, widowed and aware of what relationships and marriage entailed.
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Lucien had a nightmare that night. It had taken him a while to settle and fall asleep, the case of the two dead lads bothered him. Their clothes had been well made, not cheap; so it followed they were of good families, or at least reasonable well off. Alice had said they had been well groomed under the bruises and broken limbs. He didn't think they had been the ones who had been up to no good, perhaps they had disturbed a robbery or other crime.
His cries woke Jean as usual and also Li. The two met at the foot of the stairs, Jean told Li to go back to bed, everything was alright she would see to Lucien. She had long given up knocking on his door to wake him from his terrors and slipped into the room. He was thrashing more than usual, most of his covers were on the floor. Jean picked up a blanket and put it over the chair before sitting on the bed. Sitting on the bed was a little step further than usual, she usually just stood over him and stroked his hand and arm. She leant forward and stroked his cheek, tracing her fingers through his beard. The memory of the conversation in the surgery earlier passed through her mind. Lucien turned his face in her direction, the more intimate touch seemed to soothe him quicker than the usual stroking of his arm. She smiled, her new found boldness made her heart beat just a little faster. Placing her hand flat against his cheek she wondered, dare she, dare she kiss him? Here in his bedroom, in the half light, dare she? While she pondered, Lucien's hand found her knee. She jumped, his touch was so light it tickled. She picked the hand up and kissed his palm, then nestled her cheek in it. His hand was soft and warm, and as she looked past it she wondered again if she could be as bold as she wanted to be. Again the memory slipped into her mind, Lucien was still not completely settled. Nobody would know, not even Lucien if she was very gentle. She put one hand on the bed to steady herself and leant over him, closer, feeling his breath on her face, she kissed him, lightly on the lips. Lifting her head away just enough to speak she whispered,
'It's alright, my love, I won't let anyone hurt you.'
She felt Lucien's hand slide round the back of her head and she froze, momentarily. Wasn't this what she wanted? She relaxed. Raising her eyes to look at him, his eyes were open and he was smiling.
'Did I wake you, again?' His voice was low.
'Uh uh. But it's ok, I'm used to it.' She didn't try to back away, but smiled again.
'I wish it didn't happen.' He looked deep into her eyes, saddened that he disturbed her sleep so often, when she must need it; she was up at the crack of dawn every day.
Jean smiled, 'One day, perhaps, it will stop. Until then...'
Lucien put gentle pressure on her neck, pulling her towards him and, noticing she didn't pull back continued to pull her the short distance to his lips. The next kiss was deeper, longer more passionate, until Jean broke the connection, breathless and blushing.
Lucien put his arms round her and pulled her down next to him, her head on his chest, her arms across him. He put his foot under her legs so she was lying with him on the bed. He pulled the remaining cover over her and they both drifted off into welcome sleep.
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The sun streaming in through the gap in curtains woke Jean. She was disorientated, a steady thump, thump echoed in her head and that definitely wasn't a pillow she had her head on! Blinking she remembered what had happened last night, and she allowed herself a small smile. Her sleep had been deep, deeper than usual and she felt more than ready to face the day. Facing Charlie and Li, however, was a different matter. She would have to get up quickly, before either of them awoke, and yet she was so comfortable where she was.
'Morning.' Lucien whispered.
'Morning.' she replied, 'I'd better get up before we're caught out!'
'Charlie...' Lucien started to say Charlie would keep his own council.
'It's not Charlie that bothers me, it's Li.' She sat up and looked at him, his hair stood up in quirky tufts it made her smile. 'She arrived as you asked me to marry you, and two weeks later we share a bed! Lucien what will she think?'
'You're probably right, but I wish we could at least share a bed. I might not have any nightmares at all.' He raised an eyebrow in hope she would think it a good idea, but deep down he doubted it. Last night had been pure chance.
She kissed him and made a swift exit from the room before he decided to try to keep her there, she wasn't sure how strong her resolve was.
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Breakfast was ready as usual when Charlie arrived in the kitchen. Although he had heard Lucien the previous night he knew Jean always dealt with it and he had turned over and gone back to sleep. Li entered shortly afterwards. The noises her father had made had unnerved her, he hadn't had a nightmare since she had come to live with him so it had been a shock to her. Jean had seemed completely unfazed by the situation but she wanted to know what it was and why. She couldn't ask Jean, she would find it difficult to understand the answer, she would have to ask her father.
In between patients Li got the opportunity to talk to her father about the shouting. He explained gently that since his time in the war he had recurrent nightmares if a case was bothering him. She wasn't to worry, Jean had a way of calming him down, she should just go back to sleep. Kissing his cheek she said she was sorry he had such awful memories and hoped one day they would go away. He agreed they probably would. Another patient was in the waiting room so the conversation came to an end.
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All avenues had come to nothing in the attempts to identify the two bodies still lying in the morgue. The only thing they could think of now was to make the faces look respectable and publish pictures in the Courier, in the hope that their families read the paper. Lucien thought that at least someone would have reported them missing. Having Li come to live with them he was even more aware of the loss of a child than ever. It could have been that that had made his nightmares come back. Almost every night he shouted out and every night Jean went in and stayed.
'Jean,' Lucien caught her one evening after Li and Charlie had gone to bed.
'Mmm...' She was threading a needle to replace a missing button on Charlie's shirt.
'You have spent all of the nights since I started to have nightmares again coming down to me and staying.'
'It's what I've been doing for the past year, Lucien; coming down to you that is.' She knew what he wanted to suggest she had been wondering when he would.
'You know I appreciate it, well more than appreciate it.' He didn't quite know how to invite her into his bed. Should he suggest she save herself the trouble of starting off upstairs, or should he just come right out and say;
'You want me to start off sleeping in your bed?' She didn't want to say, 'sleep with you,' it implied something else.
'I just thought it would save you having to come downstairs, half asleep. I worry you might fall.' He reasoned. 'I'm not suggesting anything more than sleep.' He hastily added, although that might be an insult, he wasn't sure.
'Hmm...I don't know whether to be insulted or not,' she smiled slyly. 'Thank you for the consideration for my welfare.' She was going to make him work for this.
'I...I...er...I just didn't want you to think I wanted to...er you know.' Lucien stammered.
'Really, Dr Blake.' She raised her eyebrows and tried to sound stern. There was what could only be described as an awkward silence; until Jean could no longer keep her face straight.
'Honestly, Lucien,' she laughed and leaned into his arms which he wrapped around her tightly.
It wasn't the best position to sit in to sew a button on but Jean managed it. As she sewed Lucien insisted on planting kisses on parts of her head he could reach, leaning down to nibble her ear lobe. All of which made her giggle, girlishly.
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She'd spent so many nights falling asleep in his arms after a nightmare that it didn't seem at all strange or even wrong to be going to bed with him. He, very gentlemanlike, allowed her to get into bed while he was in the bathroom. Unlike Jean he found he felt nervous, he loved her so much he didn't want to do the wrong thing, to go too far, to frighten her off. He'd said just sleep nothing else but her manner told him something else, or did it? He was so confused about everything except his love for her. He sighed and went down to his room.
Opening the door he saw a sight he hoped to get used to; Jean was sitting up, reading, as if she had been sleeping in his bed for years, like an old married couple. She looked up and smiled. She'd decided that if she followed her usual routine she would remain calm and matter of fact. So she read her book until he came in. She placed her bookmark, an old piece of ribbon, between the pages, closed the book, placed it on the nightstand and slid down beneath the covers. She reached up and switched out the light.
Lucien hung his robe on the back of the door, noticing Jean's was already there, and went round to his side of the bed. Jean reached over and pulled back the covers. She found it rather sweet that he seemed far more nervous than her. Did he think she was going to throw herself at him, rip his pyjamas off and demand he show her what he was made of?!
Lucien slid under the blankets and lay flat on his back, staring up at the ceiling. Something moved over his chest then up to his face. Something soft and warm stroked his cheek and turned his face so he was looking into a pair of blue-green eyes. The slow smile that spread over her sweet face made him smile too. He turned to meet her, his arms circling her, pulling her close until he was able to kiss her, passionately, deeply. The trouble with this was that his desire became increasingly obvious, but, instead of pulling away, Jean deepened the connection. He didn't know if he could stop if she...
'It's alright Lucien,' She murmured as he broke the connection.
'Are you sure?' Jean was not one to condone extra marital affairs, or sex before marriage, so he was surprised she had firstly, agreed to sleep in his bed with him and secondly, was not rejecting his desire.
'Please don't ask me that.' She thought.
'I love you,' She said, 'We're both old enough to know what we're doing, and whatever we do do, the gossips will say what they want anyway.'
Lucien kissed her again and moved his hand inside her pyjama top, tentatively upwards until he found the softness of her breast. She gasped at his, oh so gentle, touch, then slipped her hand between two buttons of his top, opening them so she could better stroke his chest, feel the hairs usually hidden by his clothes. It felt so different to what she had been used to with Christopher, who had next to no hair on his chest. She liked it, it gave her a sense of his strength. Lucien was not quite so adept at undoing buttons with one hand and needed a little help from Jean until both their tops were open and they lay skin to skin, still kissing. Lucien rolled Jean onto her back and leant over her, moving his head down to kiss her neck, hearing her moan, ever so slightly, her growing need for him. He continued to move down her body, kissing her shoulders, her collar bone her breasts down to her belly button, his hands preceding his lips at every turn. The further down her body he went the quicker her breaths came but when his hand came to the waistband of her pyjama bottoms she gasped. Lucien lifted his head and looked at her, waiting for her to allow him to continue. She put her hand out and stroked his head, relaxing back onto the bed realising she had stiffened at this point in his ministrations. This was so new to her, the way he took his time to know her, the way his hands caressed her body; Christopher had never been like this; she wanted Lucien more than ever. Lucien continued his explorations, slipping his hand between her legs, but over the fine cotton fabric of her nightwear. He felt her response and moved his head up to hers. She moved her hands from his head down his back to the waistband of his trousers and they moved together. His hardness pressed against her and he slipped his hand inside her pyjamas feeling her need for him. Expertly removing the garment that hindered him as Jean had done to him, he moved over her and filled her with love and passion and feelings she had never before had. Lucien took her to a place she had never been and as they moved together she felt more loved than she had ever been before. She bit her lower lip in release, not daring to utter the sounds she heard in her head, but allowed herself to groan in the final release of their rapture.
Jean awoke as usual, at the crack of dawn. Something heavy was on her stomach; looking down she observed the top of Lucien's head and smiled. Thinking back to the previous night she wondered why she had been so uptight, why she had refused to let him know how she felt about him, or even acknowledge it herself. What a waste of time!
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I think that I need to go back to Li, that was the original idea of the story!