It needed to happen, so please don't hate me!
Christian
I walk towards my study and turn on my computer to look at the background check I've ordered Luke, to get for me on the palatable Ms. Steele. Fuck where is it? I look through all my e-mails and I can't find it. Did he even get it? I'm about to call Luke to my study when I hear that wonderful PING. I look back at my computer and take a deep breath before I even open THE e-mail. I click on the e-mail icon and click the highlighted "Anastasia Steele's BGC" title.
Opening it, it reads:
Name. Anastasia Rose Steele
Date of Birth. June 21, 1986 Seattle, WA
Address. 6068 Lovers Lane, Seattle, WA 98865
Mobile Number. 360 764 5322
Social Security Number. 543 67 8534
Banking Details. US Bank, Seattle, WA 98865 Account number, 089425 Balance, $78,000
Current Occupation. Vice President, 5 yrs, Seattle Independent Publishing,
Prior Employment. Hostess, Gourmet Pizza, Part-time, 414 Wilshire St, Seattle, WA 98843
Education. WSU Vancouver Campus Major, English Grade Point Average, 4.0
Prior Education. Seattle JR/SR High School
SAT Score. 2160
Political verification. Not Stated
Religious views. Not Stated
Father. Raymond Steele
Date of Birth. September 23, 1969
Occupation. Federal Burial of Investigation
Address. 726 La Meda St, Portland, OR
Mother. Carla Sinclair Steele
Date of Birth. January 6, 1970
Occupation. Unknown
Address. Unknown
Sexual Orientation. Heterosexual
Relationships. Josh Robert Manki, 2008
Spouse. Josh Robert Manki
Married. August 22, 2008, 5 yrs
Date of Birth. October 16, 1985
Occupation. Owner of Manki Constructions
Children. Theodore Raymond Steele, 5yrs, DOB March 7, 2009 Seattle, WA
Phoebe Grace Steele, 4yrs, DOB April 16, 2010 Seattle, WA
I read the e-mail four times already. I even printed the e-mail out. She's married, I can't believe it! I rub my head trying to remember if she wore a wedding ring. No she didn't! If she's married then why was she playing that game with me at the grocery store? Why, didn't she just brush me off? Why didn't I follow that stupid voice, instead of being so captivated by her, "She's fucken married!" I growl and throw a paperweight against the wall. "FUCK!" I yell. I'm fucken furious. I can't and will not destroy a family for just my personal gain. "FUUUUUCK!" I holler and rub my hands through my head. I can't touch her. She's not meant for me. I rub my face, "Fuck, this shit sucks," I say just above a whisper.
I sigh and lean my head against my recliner chair. I can't do that to those kids. Those kids. I shake my head once again. "They don't belong to me," I close my eyes and everything that happened this afternoon comes with full force back at me. Her scent, her smile, her sweet giggle, and the way she felt against my body, and fuck, that fucken magnetic pull between us. I want it, I want it bad, but I can't fucken have her. I grind my teeth, fuck now what?
I take a deep breath and call the one person I know will help.
"Hello?"
"I need your help," I sigh while running my hand through my hair. "I need your help, badly."
"I'll be right over."
Thirty minutes later, he comes through my study door.
"John, I have an issue."
"Can you be more specific?" He says with a smirk on his face. John has been my therapist for six years and knows all my darkest secrets.
My life in the past was torture, my birth mother was a whore who was an addict as well, and as for my birth father, he was never in the picture. While I was in the hands of my birth mother, the men she would sell herself to, would torture me. Some would hit me others would ignore me. But there was one that I will never, forget. He burnt me with many of his burning cigarettes. I was four years old when one of my birth mothers neighbor's called the police, about my birth mothers disappearance and how I was at home by myself for three days.
When police arrived to rescue me I was dehydrated and malnourished. I still had some minor bruising from my mother's business partners, and I had scabs on my back and chest from the burn marks. And as for my birth mother, she was found dead in an alleyway near the apartment complex, the same day they rescued me; she apparently had been shooting up, but had overdosed on the spot. I was taken to Children's Hospital and I was attended by Grace, my guardian angel, she took care of me and she refused to leave my side. When she found out I was left alone in this world, she and her husband Carrick applied to adopt me. It was three weeks after I was discharged from the hospital and taken into Child Protective Services that I was able to go home with Grace and Carrick, my mom and dad.
I'm still haunted by my past and more so confused, that's why I've been seeing John for the past six years. He helps put everything in place and he makes sense where need be. My night-terrors have been progressing, but nothing out of the norm. My night-terrors usually consist of my birth mother with men, and more so the man who tortured me by burning me. That's what wakes me, his laughter at my pain.
"Christian, if I'm here to help you might want to start talking." He speaks after he's noticed I've gone silent.
"Is it possible… well I know it is, because I've had some… but is it possible to convert someone into… what am I thinking… she wouldn't unless… no that's not right…" I can't think straight. All I can think about is our double innuendos in our conversation. I pull at my hair trying to bring direction to my thoughts. I look up and he's sitting at attention, no doubt he heard me say 'She'.
"Christian, start at the beginning." He says with a smirk on his face. Asshole!
"Okay," I take a deep breath and begin to tell him everything I did, up until I stepped inside the grocery store.
"So you went grocery shopping?" he asks for confirmation to this ludicrous idea of me, Christian Grey, grocery shopping.
"Yes, John I went grocery shopping." I say through gritted teeth when I hear the asshole laugh.
"I'm sorry for laughing Christian but you grocery shopping is like me winning the lottery," he says in his British voice. "It's hard to believe." And once again he laughs.
"Ha-ha, laugh it up John, you're supposed to be helping your patient not laughing at them," I say smirking and shaking my head. He nods his head and straightens himself out a bit before asking, "So what happened next?"
I sigh and throw my head back, thinking about Ana. The way I feel about her giggling, her touching, and her smile, the way she says my name and her inappropriate innuendos with her blushing. I break into an ear to ear smile when I think about her gasping when she felt my hard on, on her fine delectable ass. I can still picture her in front of me and I can still smell her scents.
"That good huh?" he laughs again breaking me out of my thoughts about Ms. Steele. Or should I call her Mrs. Manki? And with that thought my emotions have shifted. She's fucken married!
"Christian I can see you're angry about something now, but not more than three seconds ago you were smiling. What happened at the grocery store?" he says pulling out his I-Pad to take notes.
"I have something better." I say pulling out her background check and handing it to him. He looks at me and shakes his head in disapproval, but takes it anyway. John has always disapproved of me doing background checks on everyone I come across, but it's just a form of precaution. I could never be too careful of whom I meet. I have made some enemies in my field of work, for taking over their companies and then selling them apart. It's shrewd business but someone has to do it!
"Okay so what does this mean?" John looks at me with confusion written all over his face.
"I like her John, I want her. In my playroom with me." I say through gritted teeth.
"I can see that." He says while looking at a picture of Ana from her background check. John knows my submissive's physical traits and that's something they all have similar. Mahogany hair and fair skin.
"But what you can't see is that she's married." I panic and all the words spill out of me like word vomit and I can't hold my tongue. "She's fucken married, John! To top it off she has children, not that I mind, children are children. But how the fuck, can someone look that fucken sexy and have children?" I roar and point to her picture.
"The way she was speaking to me at the grocery store didn't hint about her being married." I say remembering her innuendos and the way she flirted with me. I get up from my chair and pace along the floor to ceiling windows, while pulling at my hair.
"I swear John she was going along with the inappropriate innuendos and I was stupidly going along with it. And when a child started to cry, I panicked and thought it was one of the kids. I was ready to charge, but she calmed me down. She fucken calmed me down, by toughing my upper arms, and I liked it! When she removed her hands I felt empty, EMPTY, like something was missing. What the fuck is wrong with me? But we were still fine; she helped me finish grocery shopping. After we said our goodbyes I left, I sat in the R8 and didn't take off right away. I saw them leaving and I asked myself if Ana had Phoebe in a toddler seat. Why would I fucken care? She's not my child! I even came to the conclusion if for some sick twisted way her kids could be mine, although I know I've never fucked Ana. The resemblance between me and her kids is uncanny. Why the fuck would I think that?"
After my rant I stop pacing the floor and turn to look at John whose eyes have now pooped out of his head and his mouth has dropped open. Oddly enough I feel better after my word vomit and take my seat once again.
"Christian this is a lot to process in one meeting. Maybe we should talk about this in sections, we'll talk first about one section and next week we'll pick up where we left off, okay?" he asked as he removes his glasses and rubs his eyes. Most definitely too much information to process for one sit down.
"Sure." I say calmly and steeping my fingers in front of my mouth.
For the next two hours we talk about what happened at the grocery store and stop where I panicked due to a crying child. John has come to the conclusion since she's married I have to respect that she is not available and I can't chase her due to her family and her marriage. And I agree, I can't and will not break a home especially when it concerns innocent children. After he leaves I place her folder back in my filing cabinet, but before I do I look once more at her photo. She's gorgeous and I hope that lucky bastard knows her worth, I may only hold her background check but I know she's fantastic. I place the manila folder in alphabetical order by last name and shut the filing cabinet.
I eye my watch and see it's almost six in the evening. I make my way towards the kitchen and make myself a peanut butter and jelly sandwich and I pour a glass of milk. I'm sitting at the breakfast bar when I catch Luke walking towards me.
"Mr. Grey, Mrs. Grey is here to see you. She's on her way up, boss." I nod and Luke walks back towards the security room.
"Hi mom." I say as I continue to eat my sandwich. I can hear the clicking of her heals making her way towards me.
"Hi sweetheart how was your day?" she asks while I stand to greet her with a kiss on her cheek.
"It was good mom. What can I do for you?" I ask as I turn to get the plate with my sandwich and glass of milk and walk towards the living room. "Mom, would you like something to drink?" I ask as we sit down on the sofa. I place the plate and glass down on the coffee table and turn to see my mother.
"No honey I'm fine thank you. I was actually coming by to ask a favor?" She asks as she toys with her wedding rings. My mother is a woman with blonde hair at shoulder length, with the most beautiful blue eyes. She's tall at 5'7 but taller with heels. She has a wonderful personality, warm and loving with a kind heart, and she means well.
"Anything mom," I say after I've taken a drink of the glass of milk.
"I need you to stop by SIP tomorrow and pick up, a book I've order from Rob, he's the CEO there." She says while blushing a bit. Why is she embarrassed?
"Sure mom, I can go. But just curious why don't you want to go?" I ask as I eye my mom.
"Well you see," she fidgets and I'm now intrigued. I cock my head to the side and raise my eyebrows in amusement.
"He hit on me when I was purchasing a book from him for Mia." She says looking down at her twisted hands. NO FUCKEN WAY!
"He did what?" I roar as I get up from the sofa.
"Don't worry your father dealt with him already," she smiles a small smile, but I see it. Dad must've given him a piece of his mind. Or fist? "I just rather be safe than sorry. I've already asked you're brother but he's away tomorrow and he won't be back until early Friday morning."
"I'll go mom. Don't worry about it," I kiss her cheek once more and she takes her leave.
"Thank you honey," she says with gratitude in her eyes. I would do anything to make mother happy. "So will you be bringing someone along on Friday?" she asks with hope in her voice. Let me rephrase my prior statement, I would do anything to make my mother happy, except for that! My mother doesn't need to meet the woman I fuck. No way in hell!
"Mom…" I shake my head, "I really don't want to have this conversation again." The last time I had this conversation with mother we had a discussion that escalated into an argument and my mother in tears because I would not settle. My father called that day and said, "You need to find, an escort for a day just to make your mother happy. I don't care who you bring, just bring someone!" So I brought my second in command Ros who brought her wife. Mom was happy to meet Ros but when her partner showed up I couldn't help laugh along with everyone else. Mom was mad, but laughed along. Ros of course told Gwen what happened and she also laughed about it. Ever since that day Ros and Gwen have also become part of the family.
"I know honey; I just love you too much not to share you." She says with a sad smile. I know mom wants grandkids and she would most definitely love to have at least, for one of her sons to be married. She lost all hope in Elliot settling down since he came out in one of rags about him being, 'Settles Biggest Playboy' mom was so embarrassed, she band any of his playmates over to the Grey Manor.
"I know mom." I give her a kiss once more on her cheek and she walks away to the foyer where she meets Sawyer.
I walk towards the ceiling to floor windows, as I see Seattle's skyline, "What is she doing right now?" I say out loud to myself.
"Who Darling?" she purrs.
"Fuck," I whisper and turn to face her.
"Elena," I turn around.
"Christian darling," she purrs while she walks towards me smelling of some god awful perfume. I know the penthouse will smell of her for a while. "How are you darling? I've been calling you, but it seems you've been avoiding my calls." She says with annoyance in her voice. I still wonder how I found her voice when I was fucking her arousing. Was I ever that deft? Her voice caries an annoying tone to it, not like Ms. Steele's, her voice is a work of art calming and soothing, while Elena's voice is eerie and chilling and cold. Just like her!
"I've been busy, Elena. What do you want?" I ask her while I bend to gather the dishes. I make my way towards the kitchen sink while Elena fallows.
"Christian what the hell, are you doing? That's why you hired staff for." She says appalled of the fact I'm picking up after myself. "Last time I checked this is my home and I can do what ever the fuck I want. Not that its any of your business I gave her the day off." I turn around after I've rinsed and placed the plate and glass in the dishwasher.
"You need a good fuck and quick. Because you're being hostile towards me, right now. Which reminds me, who is the 'She' you mentioned earlier?" she asks while looking at me intently. Nice try!
"She is also none of your business, and I don't want nor need a good fuck thank you." I say through gritted teeth. No matter how friendly we are I will never share information with her about Ana. Ana is too good for Elena and I will keep it like that. Hard limit!
"If you say so," she waves it off, but I know better. She'll snoop around gathering information and I'm glad I've locked the filing cabinet which contains Ana's background check. "I actually need a favor," she says as she has now taken perch on one of the barstools. I raise my eyebrows for her to continue. She sighs and shakes her head, "I need 25,000 dollars." I cross my arms over my chest and stand taller, I'm expecting something about the restaurant she just opened, Tirano, but to my surprise she talks about the Esclava salon she has.
"Christian I'll pay you back," she say's looking around the penthouse no doubt trying to see something out of the ordinary. You won't find it Elena, she's not here. I feel bile rising in my throat at the idea of having Elena in my house while Ana is here. Why would she be? I feel confused once again by my wayward thoughts.
"Christian… did you hear me?" Elena asks as she's now standing three feet away from me. Elena is a 54 year old woman with blonde hair and green eyes. She has a nice figure due to all the liposuctions and tummy tucks, not to mention the non stop Botox. Her breasts are bigger and slightly fuller than how I remember them, but that was years ago, which I'm now guessing she has breast implants. I eye Elena from head to toe and notice she's always in black. She's wearing a black knee length dress with black stockings and black heels that show her pedicured toes. She's a natural blonde but I know she bleaches it none the less. She has no rings on her fingers but has a diamond bracelet on her right wrist. Her hands are finely manicured and I'm guessing smooth.
"You like what you see, Christian?" Elena asks with a glimmer of hope. I scoff and head towards my study, pulling out my check book from the inside drawer of my desk, and I write out a check to her. I will never see this money again but whose keeping tract, I make 100,000 dollars an hour. Returning to the kitchen, I find her standing in the same spot. She's probably shocked from my outburst, but I would never touch Elena again. It was good, but I've had better.
"Here Elena now get out," I say while handing her the check. "And remember I don't want to know anymore about Esclava." I tell her while the check is being held by both of us. She nods and I release my hold on the check.
"You know, Christian. I have someone you can interview for a sub, she's great." She says with a smile, "I trained her myself, for you specifically." She says with a beaming smile. I have to get Ana out of my head, no matter how. I need to.
"Do you have her folder?" I ask with a raised eyebrow.
"Of course," she says as she turns around to fetch her purse from the foyer. She comes back with a manila folder much like Ana's and places it between us on the kitchen island.
"Her name is Gloria." She says eyeing the folder, expecting me to go through it with her here.
"Thank you Elena," she frowns and looks devastated she won't be able to see my reaction when I read it. She takes the hint and walks to the elevator after a quick goodbye. I hear the elevator arrive and then seconds later it's gone. I look down at the manila folder and grab it off the kitchen island and make my way towards my study to read it.
I sit on my office chair flipping the folder around in my hands while contemplating if I should really read it. I want to, but what if she intrigues me? I stop and open the folder. She's a brunette with blue eyes, immediately I think of Ana. I wonder if she could be into this. I flip through Gloria's contract and I have to say she would be ideal, but there's something off about her. I look at her picture closely and I see a hint of rebellion in them. Maybe she's perfect in the playroom, but outside she has a smart mouth. I smile when I think of all the wonderful ways I can play with her. I reach for the phone and dial.
"Elena set up a meeting with her for me at my penthouse for tomorrow at five in the evening. I would like to interview her." I speak to Elena over the phone while I've turned in my chair to look once again at the Seattle skyline.
"Of course Christian, I knew you would like her." She says and I can hint a wide grin on her face. I hang up and make my way to my bedroom. It's still early but I could use a hot shower after today's events. Walking in my bedroom bathroom, I turn on the automatic shower. I strip my clothing off and jump in. The water is exactly to my liking and it feels great hitting my back muscles, I turn around so the stream of water from the shower head hits my chest. I close my eyes and once again, I replay everything that happened at the grocery store in my mind. I open my eyes while my head is lowered and I see I am now aroused. Closing my eyes once I again, I can picture the way her hands gripped the cucumber and the way she was stroking it. Absentmindedly I begin to stroke my hard shaft in my hand as my thoughts are over taken by images of Ana in my playroom, shackled to the bed while her delicious round ass is in mid air. And another of her on my bed ready and waiting for me, I picture her under me, fucking her with her legs wrapped around my waist, while she's righting and screaming my name, arching her back as she comes for me and only me, and hard. I snap my eyes open when I feel myself cum over my hand, and fuck if that's not the best hand job I've had.
Ten minutes later I'm washed and cleaned. Stepping out of the bathroom and into my bedroom, I walk towards the chest of drawers, pulling out my boxer briefs and my grey sweatpants. I pull them on and head once again towards the kitchen for a glass of orange juice. As I'm sitting on a barstool at the kitchen island, thoughts about a family come to mind, except they're not my family they're someone else's. I shake my head to get rid myself of that thought, "She's not mine. They don't belong to me." I say out loud and drink the rest of the orange juice and place the now empty glass in the sink.
Walking to my bedroom, I remove the comforter off my bed. Does he fuck her every night? Does she scream his name as she comes for him? I sit down and rub my face with both my hands. Why am I torturing my self like this? Hopefully tomorrow will be different story and I can forget all about the lovely Anastasia Steele.
I lie down and fall asleep, dreaming about myself walking along a golden meadow, with two laughing children leading the way, while their mother holds my hand.