A bloody sunset lit the underside of rain heavy clouds, tinting them a shade of bruised purple. Raviathan's feet ached with cold. The cart jostled back and forth, enough that he never felt stable. At least the plodding, sleepy ox pulled the cart at a placid gait. The beast may have more mass, but it didn't have the quick, out of control power a horse did. Raviathan wanted to close his eyes, just to rest a moment, but the cart kept shaking him. He must have dozed at some point because he didn't realize they had reached the village until the cart stopped.

"Thanks," Raviathan said.

"Thanks to you, ser." The human held out a hand, which Raviathan took, surprised by the gesture. "Now, I know this ain't much…"

Raviathan waved away the pouch. "Ride was enough."

"Nonsense, ser. I'm in a position where I've got no cause for accepting charity."

Raviathan considered. He'd never taken coin for his work before. Wasn't this exactly what he was considering before he was recruited into the Wardens? To become a paid healer, taking in humans to subsidize the work he'd do for the elves? "Thank you."

The man nodded. "Twice a day, you said?"

"For two weeks. Should clear up by then."

"Aye."

Duncan appeared at the doorway. Surprised, Raviathan dropped from the cart to the ground harder than he intended. His ankle gave the barest twinge. "D-Duncan?"

The warrior's sword was out, wrath pinned on the driver as he strode forward.

"No. No, wait," Raviathan said, hands out on Duncan's chest. "He didn't do anything. Just gave me a ride back."

Duncan spared a glance at Raviathan before returning his glare at the frightened farmer. Duncan nodded once, sheathed his sword, then put a protective arm around Raviathan's shoulders to lead him back to the inn.

"Bath or food first?"

Considering his last meal had been breakfast, and the bath would take some preparation, Raviathan chose the meal.

"Bann Harrin's knights are here," Duncan said. "They have some questions for you." At Raviathan's pained look, Duncan explained, "So they know what happened is all. You're a Grey Warden, Rav. Any act against a Grey Warden during a blight is treason. Ser Finnian will make his report to the bann. If you'd like, I'll be there."

"Yes, I'd appreciate that."

With a squeeze on Raviathan's shoulder, Duncan left to order their meal then returned. Ser Finnian had thin, red hair that hung to the sides of his head making his ears seem overlarge. The long lines of his face ended in a long, pointed chin. He looked completely average to Raviathan. Could be another dock worker, had the knight been in home spun rather than armor. "Is this your charge, Warden?"

"Yes," Duncan replied. Raviathan was thrown by Finnian's high, gentle voice. This was a knight? Two other knights, both still in the last years of their teens, came to attention. Their shields had the same split heraldry, a black tree on a gold background under a black lion against grey.

The head knight turned to Raviathan, and gave him a small bow with his arms crossed over his chest. "Well met, ser. I am Finnian, knight of Bann Harrin who is under the Southron Arling. Always an honor to meet one of the Grey, though I wish this were under more pleasant circumstances."

Raviathan blinked. How was he supposed to respond to that? Bowed to by a human? And there was that 'ser' again. "Um… thanks."

The knight straightened. If he was put out by Raviathan's lack of etiquette, he had more grace than to show it. "Would you speak of what happened then?"

After the knight's bow and ceremony, Raviathan felt even more ridiculous recounting the chase through the streets. Grey Warden, indeed.

"Why did they attack you?"

"Thought I was Dalish at first. I told them I was with the Grey Wardens, that they could confirm that with Duncan. They thought I was lying. The brother of an ill child I saw to this morning told them I was a healer. That's when William took me."

"Were you injured, ser?"

"Um, no."

"From the witnesses I spoke with, they said you were limping."

"I twisted my ankle when I fell off the roof, but I'm fine now."

"Why were you taken?"

"By William? He wanted me to heal a man injured by bandits."

"How did you escape?"

"I didn't escape. He was going to bring me back when I finished, then he..." Raviathan felt his face grow hot. "He propositioned me. I decided it would be best if I made my own way, but I guess news that I'm a healer travelled. When a farmer saw me crossing his field, he offered to drive me here if I saw to his family."

"You said Lord William propositioned you?"

Lord William? Maker's ass. What was it with shem lords? Raviathan crossed his arms over his chest, his shoulders hunched. "How explicit do you need me to be? Said he was joking when the others came in." One of the young knights looked him up and down, but the other kept his gaze steady. Raviathan glared at the one who had ogled him. Ogled. Raviathan felt dirty.

"Do you know which farmstead he took you to?"

"No idea." Raviathan shrugged. "Near a creek. Wife of the injured man is named Molly."

Finnian gave a thoughtful nod. "Did Molly know your position?"

"That I'm a Grey Warden recruit, or that I was kidnapped?"

The knight's mouth quirked. "Both."

"I didn't tell her about either, so no? I went to work on her husband."

"Why didn't you say anything? Who you are or your circumstances?"

"What would it change? The sh… her husband needed healing. It was an emergency."

"Did Sean know?" At Raviathan's puzzled expression, Finnian clarified. "The man you healed."

"He was unconscious the whole time. When the poison starts working out of his body, he may be delusional for a day, but you can speak with him after that. So, you knew where I was taken then?"

"I was not sure," Finnian replied. "There have been multiple attacks on the western boarders of Harrin's land. Bandits and a tribe of Dalish moving north. A number of farmsteaders have suffered injuries, and our lands have been without a proper healer for years, which has made some freemen rather… desperate. When I questioned the villagers, all of whom were agog at the news a healer was passing through, I opined you would be safe enough, which I explained to your Commander," Finnian said casting a quick glance at Duncan. "You might be overworked, perhaps, but few would risk injuring such a valued resource, particularly now."

Valued resource, Raviathan thought resentfully. As if he were a prized ox.

Finnian continued at his silence. "Were you paid for your services?"

Raviathan hesitated. "I've never asked for payment before."

The knight's focus sharpened. "Don't charge? But didn't you state you were a healer?"

"I'm… I worked for my alienage. They couldn't afford to pay me."

"Couldn't afford?" The knight narrowed his eyes, mystified. "How then did you live, ser?"

"I was a dock worker." Raviathan looked down, embarrassed by his station in front of these men.

All of the knights' full attention was on him now. One of them scoffed. "From dock worker to Grey Warden? That's quite the promotion. Whose cock did yo-" A clank of metal sounded as his fellow elbowed him in the side.

Finnian turned, very slowly, and strode to the younger man. His words were too low for Raviathan to hear what was said, but from the look on the younger knight's face, Raviathan would have paid money to hear what went between them. When finished, Finnian turned back to Raviathan, giving him a deep bow. "Ser. My deepest apologies for the slight. Such words are most unbecoming, a sentiment not fit for present company."

"Uh," Raviathan stopped himself from taking a step back. Everything about this was off. "Ser, um, Finnian. You gave no insult. Please, don't, uh, bow."

"My charge spoke out of turn. As he is my charge, his behavior is a reflection upon myself. I have not been thorough enough in his education if he feels free to disrespect a man of your station. His failure is mine, for which I accept responsibility. Ser, please forgive this slight."

Alarmed, Raviathan looked back up at the young knight. Brown hair and wide features, the young knight's cheeks glowed red, his gaze locked on the floor. If he were any random elf, Raviathan would have been nothing to these men. He thought he should feel honored. Vindicated at least. This is how people should behave. Respectful. Wasn't this what he had wanted from humans? Some basic courtesy, the same courtesy they showed one another?

Instead, Raviathan felt hollow. Not a week ago, these same men would have call him knife ear, propositioned him with little regard for his protests, allowed a lord to steal women to be raped. Raviathan was no different, no better than he had been a week ago when guards, knights, and nobles took what they wanted without a thought to the dignity of his people. Instead of reveling in the manners his station now demanded, Raviathan felt even dirtier. Like a pretender. Not only was he not a Grey Warden yet, the manners of these men were a simple courtesy of Raviathan's new station, not how they would truly behave if their trappings of nobility were stripped away. We're all pretenders here.

"Please," Raviathan said, unable to look at any of them now. "Your apology is unnecessary."

"You are too gracious, ser." Finnian straightened. "But this does bring me to my next question. Would you accept a formal apology from Lord William?"

"Apology?" Raviathan folded his arms over his chest. "No. Not from him."

Regarding Raviathan with a thoughtful tilt of his head, Finnian said, "For injuries to your person, such a settlement is common."

Raviathan lifted his chin up. "He said 'better to apologize than ask for permission'. His words mean nothing to me."

When Raviathan caught Finnian's weary expression, a look he had seen often in Valendrian, he knew this man didn't pretend at his code. Understanding flashed through Raviathan's mind as he studied the knight. Just a man, like any other, and yet his bearing set him apart, like a diamond among glass stones. Raviathan's own bitterness was getting in the way of seeing that fact because it was easier to be angry. He had needed that anger to keep him moving when he wanted to give up, but anger was blindness as much as strength.

Knights, lords, and pretenders. Were they really not as synonymous as Raviathan had always assumed? Ser Finnian's code was bound to his identity, as much as a spirit to the body it inhabited. William didn't pretend to live by a code at all. The man was what he was, without apology. As much as Raviathan detested what William had done, that shem had no pretensions of being someone different. The only pretender in this room was a little dock worker who thought he was a Grey Warden.

"Ser Finnian? If you don't mind, I have some questions."

"Certainly, Warden. How may I be of service?" The knight regarded him with polite interest.

Raviathan paused. Warden. He was still called Warden. That threw him as much as the knight's respect. Even his phrasing, 'how may I be of service', struck Raviathan. "Uh. Well, um, what can you tell me of Lord William?"

"I have met the man but a few times, so I do not know much beyond reputation. He was freeborn, but fostered at Gwaren as reward for some service, marshaling the town against a hostile neighbor, if memory serves. He was trained and awarded lordship and lands upon return. He is known for having a good reputation with the Dalish, who camp near here. How he gained their trust enough to negotiate with them, I do not know. My own opinion is that he is on the rough side but loyal to his people. Crafty."

Finnian hesitated. "I do not know if I am surprised by this incident or not. He has never been one for the finer points of noble behavior. Lord William does what he thinks needs to be done without regard for the consequences, but he has a reputation for upholding the rights of elves."

"What will happen? To William and Molly?"

"The bann will decide, of course. Anything I say is mere supposition. Based on what I know of Bann Harrin, Molly will need to plead her case, but since she was not an active participant, she will be left alone. Same with Sean. Could be they will have time added to their indenture. The villagers here knew William was involved; however, their silence on this matter will mean censure for the village. Additional taxes, or, more likely, more time added to their yearly work on Harrin's farms. Then, of course, the penalty for aiding in an attack on a Grey Warden who made his identity known is a serious offense."

Finnian pursed his lips as he thought. "William is a trickier case for me to predict. Bann Harrin likes William—has as let the man get away with more than most would have in the same circumstances, but with the King's favor of the Grey Wardens, this may be a slight of honor that cannot be so easily forgiven. Especially since he has added to his offenses."

"Added how?" Raviathan asked.

"To your person," Finnian answered in surprise. "You said he propositioned you."

Raviathan's brow knit as he considered. "But if Molly and Sean had nothing to do with it, why will they be punished?"

"They may not have known, but that does not excuse they have a part in this crime."

"That doesn't seem fair. Could I… I don't know. Write a letter on their behalf? Or something?"

Finnian gave him a nod. "A plea from the injured party would help their case."

Raviathan pondered the knight's speech. He could guess well enough at the man's meaning, but the knight's jargon left him wondering about the codes magistrates used. "I'm not sure how to phrase such a letter."

"I would assist you," Finnian offered, his gentle voice becoming softer. "With the storm, we will need to stay the eve, so we could do this at your convenience."

"Okay, then."

"Then we are settled. Your day must have been trying, indeed. I would not delay you from your meal. At your convenience, we shall draft a letter and finish any remaining business. "

Duncan gave Finnian a nod then led Raviathan to their waiting meal. "This day's been quite the adventure for you." Duncan sounded angry, though he kept it in check.

They found a booth in a dark corner, giving them privacy. Raviathan didn't say anything as he stared at the pastry mold that was his supper. Instead of eating, he put his hands in his lap, head bowed, ready for his lecture.

"Eat up." Duncan already had the wolf's share of the buttered parsnips, mashed turnips, and rye bread.

"Are you mad at me?"

"Not mad." He broke his own pastry mold to allow steam to escape. Raviathan was surprised that someone with his appetite had waited. "Not at you anyway. But we can't have this anymore. Every inn we've been to, there's been some sort of trouble. Tamriel's had problems, but nothing like this."

"Tamriel?"

"Our other elven Warden."

There was another elf? "Why didn't you tell me there was another elf?"

"Does it matter? A Warden is a Warden." Duncan glanced at him, a sly glint in his gaze.

A little tease, but it was enough to let Raviathan know he wasn't in trouble. "Ha ha." Tension eased from his shoulders now that his worries were over. Inside the mold was a stuffed pike, a rare meal served to those who could afford such luxuries. Spiced apple cider graced Raviathan's meal instead of water. Why had Duncan decided on such a costly meal?

The worries that shem lord instilled left. Duncan wasn't mad, but more importantly, Raviathan knew Duncan was nothing like William. That 'lord's' words didn't have any weight over him, not anymore. "I don't know what to say, Duncan. I don't know how I could have prevented anything that happened today other than make sure I have an escort."

"That won't do. Today has been unusual, to be sure, but every inn? How did you get around Denerim?"

"Elves travel in groups. Especially after Arl Urien left with most of his guards. I got picked on outside of the alienage. Daily at the docks." Raviathan chewed his lower lip. "I think… I'm not sure, but I think since there were more elves in Denerim, I wasn't so exotic. Since we've left Denerim, I haven't seen many elves. A few working in a field, but none in a town. What's Tamriel like?"

"He's from a hamlet near Gwaren. He's had a hard life, so he keeps to himself. I can guess at bits, but as a matter of courtesy, Wardens don't pry into each other's pasts. Why would you be more of a target if there are fewer elves?"

Raviathan gave a one shouldered shrug that was more casual than he felt. Though he kept his eyes on his food, he could feel Duncan watching him, waiting. Sighing, Raviathan lowered his fork. "Duncan, I don't know much beyond my alienage. This… this whole world… it's like going to a different country. All the rules are different. What I know is that if an elf isn't living in an alienage or isn't living with a noble family as part of their work, they're a whore. Most elves who lived outside the alienage only did so because they were kicked out. There might be some way for them to eke out a living, but most became whores. That's how most humans came in contact with elves in a city, so when we were outside the alienage, that's what we were assumed to be. Not always, but that was pretty common. That… that man, William." Raviathan's cheeks felt hot. "He'd been with an elf before. The things he said… I don't know who he's been with, or how. But I've no doubt there are elves around here who are being used."

"That would explain why you've been such a target, but we still need to find some strategies to minimize the danger you keep finding yourself in."

Raviathan nibbled at his lip. "What about something official to show I have rank? Like a Grey Warden badge?"

Duncan paused to look the elf over. The boy's cloak and blanket turned poncho hid his weapons while making him appear more like a passing laborer than a warrior. "When we have time, perhaps at Ostagar, we'll get you some true fitted armor. With a seal." Duncan's smile flashed. "You'll have to learn how to mingle among the nobles and knights."

Raviathan snorted. He nibbled his lip before he broached the next subject. "Duncan. Did you know Solyn? My aunt?"

"Adaia's sister? I never met her, but Adaia spoke of her once. If memory serves, Valendrian said she was killed."

"Do you know how?"

"I'm sure Valendrian said, but I don't remember."

With a quick glimpse around the room to make sure his words would only be between them, Raviathan said, "She was murdered. Valendrian organized searches when she disappeared. It took a week to find her. Duncan, you've seen how I've been treated outside the alienage. You know elves are a target. My people may not be slaves anymore, but that mentality, that we're less than humans, is still pervasive. Even in Ferelden. After she died, my skill as a physician was kept secret. Thing is, everyone knew I had been her apprentice. They had already seen me working, knew what I was capable of. But we all sort of knew to keep it quiet."

"Why are you telling me this?"

"Because… because we need to take precautions. Duncan, if you still want me as a Warden, I'll serve. I've no complaints about that. But… well, how am I going to be of use? You said it yourself. I seem to get in danger all the damn time."

A warm hand squeezed his shoulder, and Raviathan felt his eyes prick with tears. Duncan's voice, low and calm, was as comforting as Nesiara's embrace. "Outfitting you as a Grey Warden will help. You're right about that. Rav, you just need time. I've mentored many Warden recruits over the years. In a few months, a year at most, you'll see."

Raviathan took Duncan's hand in both of his, squeezing tightly. He couldn't keep his eyes on anything but the old warrior's calloused hand. The early stages of arthritis knotted his joints. Careworn hands. Strong. "Duncan, she was raped. They," Raviathan took a deep breath, "they used a knife. When I found her… Maker. It was one of the worst moments of my life. Dried blood covered her thighs. She was so dignified. Educated. Patient. The way she held herself… she was regal. They left her naked, hidden under garbage. I found her because it was summer. She'd been left there for a week. The only reason I found her was because… because she started… to rot." Raviathan stopped when a sob jerked his chest. "She didn't deserve that. Be bruised. Humiliated. Broken."

"Why?" Duncan's voice was a calm whisper. "Why did they do that? Do you know who?"

"We think…" Raviathan bit his lips. He squirmed not able to look at anything for long. "She had human patients. We think one of them turned her in. Templars were seen near where I found her body. The day she disappeared."

"Templars? Rav, you can't think…"

"What?" His head shot up, hands tight enough that Duncan winced in his grip. "That a single elf on their own isn't a target?"

Duncan gently loosened Raviathan's grip. "I don't want to make light of this. I can see how painful telling me about her is, but templars don't chase down physicians."

As Raviathan expected, Duncan wouldn't believe him, even with the story. "Duncan, please. I saw what they did to her. You saw, you know, what happened at the alienage. What happened to me today. Elves just don't have the same rights. And templars aren't always reasonable." Raviathan took a breath to steady himself. "They hear the barest rumor of an apostate, and that person disappears." He forced himself to keep Duncan's gaze. "Please? Please just think about what I've said? This… this whole world. It's a different place for me than it is for you. I need you to try and understand that."

Though Duncan didn't look convinced, Raviathan could see he was at least considering. That shem lord was an idiot. Screw him. Duncan was a good man.

"Finish your meal, then go get cleaned up. It's been a hard day for you. We'll talk more of this later, when you're not so exhausted, and when things aren't so close to the surface."

"You'll think about what I've said?"

"Yes." Duncan squeezed his hands back for emphasis.

Taking a deep breath, Raviathan forced himself to calm. Food took the edge off his exhaustion. Heat from the bath eased the tension that had been making his shoulders ache. He meditated in the bath, going through mental exercises so that he could distance himself from the day, from the memories of Solyn.

"Ser?"

As Raviathan left the bathing room, a serving girl interrupted his reverie. He raised his eyebrows in polite interest.

"Wanted to say sorry. When we found out William had taken you… Well, Billy said it was for a healing. We knew you'd be safe if that's what he'd taken you for. But if Finnian went for you… Couldn't risk one of our countrymen. Maker's breath, but we could sorely use your skills. But promise, we didn't think you'd be in any real danger."

Raviathan didn't have anything to say in response. He murmured acknowledgment but otherwise remained silent.

"Your… ah, Commander, he was off finding a place for you to train. When he came back, found out what happened… Ah. Just… sorry."

Why was the girl so nervous? "I'm not happy about it, but I appreciate your apology."

"Ah," the girl relaxed. "I'm Selice," she said but it sounded more like a question the way she inflected her name. "Innkeeper is my father. If… if you're willing… many folks have come by asking for you."

"Asking for me?" What was it now? Did he and Duncan have to sneak away in the night?

"Just… if… well, your Commander said you'd be here another day. Would… well, would you be willing to see to them?"

"As a physician? I… need to talk to Duncan." Then Raviathan thought about Old Beth. "No, I don't. I'll see to anyone who wants to come. Whether they have coin for my services or not."

Her smile, genuine and relieved, brought charm to an otherwise plain face. The image of her smile remained with Raviathan when he returned to the main room. Just a little courtesy was all he asked for.

"You are looking much better, Warden," Finnian greeted him as Raviathan sat at his table. The knight put aside the report he had been working on, then brought out a fresh vellum for Raviathan. The two worked on the letter, Finnian patiently explaining all the legal jargon, which frustrated Raviathan as much as fascinated him.

"What is the purpose of using language that's so far beyond how people speak? Seems like it's meant to befuddle anyone who seeks justice at court."

"A fair assessment," Finnian said with a smile. "At times the terminology is confusing, but there are reasons for everything. Legal language is coded because the law demands precision. A balance must be made between writing a law that is defined enough that it is clear, while remaining universal so as to be applicable to many cases."

Raviathan scanned the report of the incident, testing his new understanding of legal protocols, asking when he needed clarification. While he didn't understand every word, and some terms took him a few seconds to recall, the report wasn't the mystery it would have been an hour ago. "Finnian, why did you believe me?"

"Should I not have?" Finnian asked, his interest piqued.

"I spoke the truth, but how did you know?"

"You are a Grey Warden. Your word has value."

"Nobles are supposed to have value, but they lie. Hide their true fortunes or dalliances."

"True," Finnian said, stretching the word out. "However, when you recounted the chase, even including the rather inglorious moments," Finnian smiled to remove any sting from his words, "the details matched what I had already learned from the townsfolk."

"Did William come back to the village?"

"I did not see him."

"He said Duncan was upset."

Though Finnian kept his features carefully under control, Raviathan saw humor dance beneath the knight's calm surface. "'Upset' is a bit of an understatement. I will say I am glad the man was not out for my head."

"What did he do?"

A smile touched Finnian's eyes, though his mouth remained straight. "When I had arrived, with haste mind you, based on the panicked tales of a few villagers, your Commander had taken three of the men who attacked you hostage, their lives forfeit if any harm befell you. The others he let go in order to take that message to William."

Duncan did that? Raviathan held his breath, fortifying himself before he spoke. "I want to retract my accusation that William propositioned me."

"Ser?"

"He's a bully. He was needlessly cruel. But, upon reflection, I think he was only trying to get a rise out of me."

"Perhaps," Finnian prompted gently, "if you could give me some specifics?"

"Told me I was a cock rider. That all elves are. He joked that he didn't want to let me go."

"I admit I'm surprised that he would say such things about you or your people considering his relations with the Dalish, and yet I am not surprised considering his person." Finnian considered. "Then the charge should change to conduct unbecoming of a lord."

"That's a crime?"

"Oh, yes. Not one that is enforced as much as it should be, but a crime nonetheless."

Raviathan bit his lips. "Would you treat me with the same respect if I were not a Warden recruit?"

Again, Finnian took his time to consider. He spoke carefully, "You have been often wronged, so I understand your distrust. Many of the manners Fereldan lords have are a holdover from the Orlesian indoctrination during the occupation. In Orlais, respect is only required of those of equal station or above. This attitude has unfortunately affected a fair number. Personally, I find such affectations sycophantic, a degradation that weakens the Ferelden spirit. That being said, while I have not always behaved as well as I should, I strive to uphold the honor that speaks true to this nation's history. You are as much my countryman as any other."

"That's the reason for your code?"

"From a purely idealistic standpoint, yes. And that is all that need be required for a man's honor. However, in my experience, when I treat people with respect, I find there are many more people who are deserving of that respect. There will always be the brutish, the ignorant, the ingrate, the exploitative. Should I let such baseness change who I am, make me deny what I hold as true? Or shall I say I require more of myself, that honoring the dignity of another person is a strength?"

"The world is not so easy as that. I will not spare the feelings of a person who tries to do me harm."

"Respect is not about apologizing to the man trying to remove your head. It is also not allowing yourself to be used. Respecting another is about retaining your own integrity in the face of those who would rob you of it."

"You… have an interesting code, Ser Finnian. I'm not sure if it's practical, or if I agree with it, but I'm grateful that people like you exist. I will think on what you said."

Finnian stood with Raviathan and offered his hand. "An honor to meet you, Warden. May the Maker watch over you."

"Maker watch over us all." Raviathan shook the knight's hand then left the common room. Around Finnian, such a code seemed possible to live by. Not easy, but possible. The code was all the more valuable because holding to such mores required sacrifice. Finnian must have struggled, been tested over the years, yet he carried himself with an effortless grace. Was binding oneself to such principles ultimately limiting or freeing?

Deep in thought, Raviathan didn't notice the hall was occupied until he bumped into a man passing him. Realizing who it was, Raviathan caught the young knight by the elbow. "You. I want to speak with you." The knight glanced at him distrustfully. "You owe me," Raviathan pressed.

"Just talk?"

What else would he want? At Raviathan's nod, the knight looked about to make sure no one saw them, then the two ducked into a store room.

"What is it then?"

"Your name?"

The knight crossed his arms, the metal of his armor screeching as it rubbed. Reluctantly, he said, "Gage."

"You've been with elves?" The knight turned to leave, but Raviathan grabbed his elbow again. "Look. I've got men coming after me, left and right, and I need to learn how to defend myself. Or better yet, make them stop before they start. To do that, I need to understand."

"I don't need more trouble from my lord."

"This is just between us. Promise."

Gage bent his head down. "Alright," he said quietly. "Yeah."

Raviathan leaned against one wall, and Gage followed suit. "Were you always attracted to elves?"

"Naw. Well, your women, yes."

"So… what changed?"

Gage rubbed his jaw, unable to return Raviathan's gaze. "My friends and I were celebrating. They, um… we went to a house. I was never interested in men. My… my friend kept going on about elven men. Said they were like nothing else. He kept talking, and talking. He paid. So… I tried it out. You know? I mean, squires don't earn much, and, well, he'd be the only one who knew what I'd be doing. So, why not? After that… just changed the way I thought. When I've got a choice, and no one knows…" Gage glanced up, a quick shift before looking back down at the floor. "What I said, I didn't mean. Knew I was being rude. Don't even know why I said it. Knew Ser Finnian would be upset. Just…" he sighed. "Ah, Maker."

"Do you enjoy human men?"

"Tried it a few times. Not the same. Elves just… feel better. Clean. Smell nicer. More, um, active, you know?"

While prostitutes needed men like this for their survival, Raviathan wanted to hit him. "Can't you at least be kind to them?"

"I've never hurt anyone," Gage said, straightening. "Not, er, them anyway."

Though he wanted to lecture the shem, there wasn't much point. Such was the way of the world. "Just… just remember that they wouldn't be there if they had a choice. Least you can do is be respectful for what you're getting out of it."

Silence.

Raviathan bit his lips as he thought. "So then. What would you recommend I do to keep men from coming after me?"

Now it was Gage's turn to look thoughtful. "Don't know, really. Ah, I don't mean no offense here. Really, I don't. But you just look… ripe."

Ripe? Raviathan felt his cheeks warm. "Could you be more specific, please?"

Gage flushed. "Ah… I don't know. Ready."

Raviathan squirmed. He had asked, knew he was responsible because he had asked, but he hadn't been prepared for the embarrassment the knight's answers would bring. He took a few slow, steadying breaths. His emotions still boiled, like rushing water under a thin ice sheet, but he could retain control for now. "What would make me look less ready?"

"I… I don't rightly know. Mm. Maybe look a little tougher? Wear your weapons where they can be seen? Don't know if that would help. Some would take that as invitation to knock you down a bit. Maybe… maybe be colder?"

That took Raviathan a minute. Gage hadn't given him a solution, but he did make Raviathan review how he would appear to someone else. He thought of the women he had known, what made one look easy, another a challenge, and what turned him off. If a prostitute had triggered this man's libido, then he was attracted to elves who had been broken down, were cast out and alone. Women who were damaged on the inside left Raviathan cold, but that didn't hold true for other men, especially shems. If he thought like a predator, damaged meant easy. That attitude was repugnant in the callousness it required, but then these were shems.

Maker knew he had been full of tears lately. His emotions were always close to the surface. That reinforced everything he felt about Duncan. Duncan had never taken advantage of his vulnerability. Had only tried to help see him through his pain.

Murmuring his thanks, Raviathan started to leave only to find the knight's hand on his arm. At the glare Raviathan shot him, Gage retracted his arm as if he had grabbed a hot potato. "I… uh. I just wanted to say sorry. For what I said. Before."

Raviathan softened, gave him a nod to show acceptance, and returned to his room. Duncan was already dressed for sleep, thumbing idly through one of Raviathan's books. When ready, Duncan blew out the candle and the two settled into bed. Raviathan curled up next to Duncan, his head resting on the old warrior's shoulder.

"Rav?"

"Night, Duncan." Raviathan smiled at Duncan's awkwardness. "Sleep well."