leon(petting his Pomeranian menacingly): What brings you to my den?

Moshirige: I'm here to make you an offer you can't refuse.

Leon(pulling out his gun blade): you have five seconds to explain yourself and make up for your poor attempt to quote that movie, otherwise I will kill you and feed your remains to the cats.

Moshirige: you mean dogs?

Leon(cocks gun): your remains aren't good enough for my puppies. Now proceed.

Moshirige(gulping before explaining his desire to go to dream island): Blah bla blah blah

Leon: I see, and what is in it for me?

Moshirige: imagine fields of puppies waiting to be frolicked in and the chance to add another puppy to your pack.

(Moshirige passes a photo to Leon. The Pomeranian jumps out of Leon's lap picks up the photo before taking it to Leon)

Leon(looking at the photo): I see, this will suffice.

Missile the Pomeranian (wagging his tail): she's pretty.

Moshirige (pushes his glasses up like a typical anime guy, before starting to snicker): nyhe...nyhe...nyanyanyahahaahaha!

(Leon knocks Moshirige out with the bare end of his gun blade)

...

(Back on the SS L.P., Nico looks out to the ocean horizon while Bernie sleeps in the captains room. Gato takes notice and joins Nico)

Gato: Look Nico, everything the light touches is the land of voices.

Nico: are you quoting line king.

Gato(ignoring nicos comment and continuing): A let's plays time of power rises and falls like the sun. When one lets play ends another begins, such is the circle of life.

Nico(pointing to a large mass of dark fog on the ocean): What about that shadowy place?

Gato: that is a place beyond love and sanity and unfortunately we have to sail through it.

Nico(pulling up the map): are you sure there's no way around it?

Gato: many sailors have tried only for the fog to sneak up on them and engulf them in its hell.

Nico: Geez, what even is it?

Gato: it is the fog of damned voices.

Nico(shivering): you don't think moshirige is in there?

Gato: no moshirige has a quirky and pitiful charm to him, but other voices aren't as fortunate.

Nico: I'm getting a little scared.

Gato: Keep your shit together and you will be fine.

Usami: alrighty everyone, we will be sailing through the fog, so keep all of your arms and legs inside the boat at all times.

(The boat sails directly into the fog causing everyone to be engulfed in DARKNESS)

Nico: aw crap, anybody got a light?

Gato (turning on his red visor): I got you covered.

Nagito: wait what's that up ahead?

(Everyone looks to see a ghostly figure wearing a deep sea diving helmet)

Nico (starting to feel dread deep in his balls): oh no.

(The boat gets closer to discover the figure is floating like a ghost. Without a word, the figure floats over to the boat)

Nico: oh god no, please no.

Nagito: what's wrong Nico?

Nico(running for the steering wheel) nope, nope, and nope. I am not going to go through this again.

Masked figure (muffled while trying to pull off the helmet): wheate

(The masked figure reveals themselves to be a girl with brown hair tied into pigtails by red ribbons)

Nico: ahhhh- wait who are you?

Girl: what how can you not remember naia?

Nico: wait something's coming to me. ...sh...shut up Naia

Naia: that's it.

Nico: it's been so long, like five years.

Naia: yep, but more importantly, Naia came to warn you of the Trio.

Nico: trio?

Naia(fading away): uh oh. They're here.

Komaeda: that seemed like an odd and pointless cameo that came out of nowhere, probably to pander to the old fans.

Usami: what?

Nico: wait, pointless cameos that add little to nothing to the overall plot and comes out of nowhere... Oh God No.

(Three laughters echo in the fog followed by three ghostly figures clothed to look like grim reapers)

Gato: who the hell are you three freaks?

(The figures lift their hoods to reveal themselves to be Old Bags, Larry, and Lana Hart)

Old bags: we are the trio and we have come to seek vengeance on you.

Nico: why do so many voices have it out for me?

Lana Hart: because you made our voices to be annoying and easy to ridicule.

Larry: yeah, what she said.

Nico: oh quiet being a suck up Larry. Besides, you three know very well how annoying you are.

Gato: you speak of vengeance, but how do you plan to enact it?

Old bag: oh you're a sexy boy aren't you. Maybe even sexier than my edgypoo.

Gato: back she-demon

Lana: anyway, we're going to kill you. Once we have destroyed you, then we will gain the power to change our voices.

Komaeda: ah, so that is your hope. To use Nico as a stepping stone to overcome the despair of having annoying voices.

Lana: well aren't you deranged and malnourished. If i had all my camera equipment I could take some good shots of you and make millions off of the profits.

Komaeda: yeah, my fan girls are a pretty good demographic for profit. Could you send the photos to haji?

Lana: and your into guys? Oh i am going to milk you for all your worth.

Nico: nobody is milking anyone.

Usami: we need to keep the ratings down for the good boys and girls.

Larry: oh my gosh, you sound like my drug dealer.

Usami: what?! That's preposterous! I would never make and sell drugs for a profit.

Nico: possible ships, fan girl exploitation, and Usami being a drug dealer aside. I will not die to the likes of you three.

Old bags: then we'll have to do it the hard way.

Horace(popping up out of nowhere): with a game of FRUIT BALL!

Usami: what is this fruit ball?

Nico: don't ask

Horace: well you see I have a whole bunch of comedically large FRUIT shaped like BALLS, so what better way to use them then as balls for a re-skin of SOCCER.

Gato: then shouldn't it be called soccer with fruit.

Horace: NO! It's called FRUIT BALL, damn it, FRUIT BALL!

Komaeda: Calm down crazy horse man, we'll play your game of soccer.

Horace: FRUIT BALL!

Nico: you know you're crazy when komaeda calls you crazy. Besides where could we even play fruit ball?

(Just as he says it, an arena forms in front of them)

Nico: shit, we're really doing this.

Larry: Yes and there is no way you can escape, unless a whale were to come out of nowhere and conveniently push you out of this fog. The chances of that happening are like a million to one.

Komaeda: please, don't insult my bullshit.

(Sure enough, thanks to some force a giant wave comes out of nowhere and hits the tiny boat at such an angle that it skips straight across the water and out of the fog)

Old bags: God Damn it Larry!

Larry: sorry.

...

(Outside the fog, the crew recovered from the rough landing, just in time for Bernie to wake up from her nap)

Bernie: Hey. What did I miss?

Gato: Bullshit.

Nico: well I guess we're headed to the next location.

Komaeda: not if the word count has anything to say about it.

Nico: What?

(To be continued...)