Disclaimer: I do not own Tsubasa, neither do I own the starting of this story.

Warning: THIS ENTIRE STORY IS YAOI/ BxB. DO NOT PROCEED IF THIS IS NOT WHAT YOU'RE LOOKING FOR.

LOTS OF ANGST AND RAPE/ NON CON. BE-WARNED.

Chapter 6: Taste of Abuse

Fai walked into the bath tent solemnly. It was sometime pass dinner and the sky had already turned dark. Majority of the bathing crowd has already dispersed to their own sleeping tents, leaving more than half the area empty.

The day of training had left him feeling really worn out..both physically and mentally. Today, the war master had him matched up against Kinomoto. In terms of agility and speed, the shorter black head was on par with him. But in terms of stamina, his was totally on another level. Even though his attacks were really straightforward, Fai had no problem evading them initially. But long hours of sparing eventually drew out the difference and the blonde only won by a marginal fraction. To be honest, if he had a choice he would rather had a sparing with Kurogane anytime than Kinomoto. It would be way more fun than what he had today. At least, it wouldn't physically drain him.

And yes.. there was the ongoing mental battle that never ceased to end.

Fai sighed wearily as he made his way into the showering area. He could feel eyes lurking on him, each gleaming with lust at his naked body, threatening to swallow him whole in the distance. Fai lifted his head and walked straight forward, trying his utmost best to ignore each and every presence.

Usually he would avoid bathing at this time. He knew that there will still be people around, so he would settle for a shower in the late hours of the night or the wee hours before dawn breaks where majority of the people were asleep. He didn't like the feeling of being watched, especially in shower, the only time he can relax.

Today, however, he just felt like showering regardless of the time or the number of people. Water has always been able to clear his thoughts and he needed it badly today.

"Well.. At least it's only half-filled" Fai muttered to himself refusing to give in to his pessimistic thoughts. After all, it was not like him to see a glass half empty instead of half-full. It is a matter of psychology.

As the cascade of warm water lands and flow down his back, he felt his tense muscles relax.

However, this moment of liberation is nothing but short.

His muscles once again coil up in preparation for battle at the threatening sensation that bores into his back.

Knowing that it is the usual intense looks of 'admiration' and mostly desire that he is receiving, he shuddered uneasily, attempting to push the sickening sensation of people following his every movement out of his mind and indulge in his endeavour.

He then turned the knob up to increase the flow of water as well as the temperature.

Now, water no longer sprinkled but pounded on his back, swallowing him in its descend, washing away the lingering stares, stress and intense training he had endured the entire day. The loud continuous thud of water against his skin had effectively aid in blocking him from the world he so desires to escape.

Fai stood under the torrent of water for god knows how long.

The purpose of this trip was to sort out his thoughts. There were just so many.

The kids.

The mission.

The men.

The language.

This place.

Him.

He had been contemplating whether to tell his companion about the situation at hand for the past week. Given the raven's temper and character, Fai knew that he would definitely explode in anger and blow up the matter. Then, there would be no return when that happens.

Surely, it would involve at least a few broken tables and a collapsing tent. Blood spill would be inevitable. Then his thoughts stop short. He did not want to think what kind of consequences Kurogane's reaction would bring. They had to stay here and wait for the kids to arrive. It would not be safe to leave this place and wander around with the war brewing.

A small chuckle of irony escaped from his throat. Yet, he would not be safe to stay here. Something told him that things aren't going to get better with time.

Furthermore, there was something wrong about this place.

Dark magic lurked in the depths of the shadow. Something ancient, something foreboding. He did not know what, but it did not seem to pose much trouble at this moment.

Fai shuddered, returning back to his thoughts. Sure, the marks on his body would serve as evidence to his mishap, but it would not pinpoint its inflictor. These bruises only serve to prove one thing- that he was weak and could not fend for himself.

That is the one last thing he wanted to happen. For Kuro to think that he cannot take care of himself and require saving.

Frankly speaking, a part of him really wanted Kuro to figure it all out and save him from further torture. He knew Kuro will be able to protect him. But he had not forgotten the night in the bar in Outo Country. Kuro had said that people should rescue themselves and not wait for others to do it. He had scoffed when Fai said that he had been waiting for someone to come and take him away.

No. He would not allow it. "I can take care of myself. "He shivered as the ghost of the night's dream flashed past his eyes once again. The vivid memory of his companion's disgust still haunted him. You could not imagine the shock he had the first time he opened his eyes to see Kurogane's face next to his. It was as though he had woken up to a continuation of his nightmare. Just that it wasn't. The face of the sleeping raven close to his somehow feels..

Reassuring?

Well, in any case, he wasn't complaining. It was warmer that way. Snow had begun to pile these few days. It's only going to get colder as the days passes. The heart of the winter is approaching..

Maybe that was the reason why his nightmares had stopped haunting him recently.

In any case, never is he going to speak a word about this to his partner. In the event that he really did notice..

Fai chuckled silently. What is the likelihood of that actually happening? Pretty low he'll say. His secret would be safe as long as the deed is not caught red-handed. He can beam and hid behind his mask in the meantime.

He will not allow it to happen. Kuro-tan will never know.

With that, he made his decision.

He closed his eyes, enjoying the simple rhythmic beat of the water together with his heart in sync. At the moment, he genuinely felt at ease, mind momentarily emptied of all his troubles and worries.

"Hrrrr" Feeling suddenly breathless from the long shower of hot water, Fai snapped out of his thoughts and turn the water off.

He glanced over at his shoulder, noting that his pale skin has already turned red. What had seems like one min in his head could possibly be thirty minutes in reality.

Taking a deep breath, Fai stared down at the floor, letting the remnant water drip. He exhaled, his breath echoing across the shower area.

Noting the sudden lack of sound, Fai raised his head quizzically. When has the area become so quiet? Puzzled, he tilted his head sideways, stealing a glance at the doorway.

Two silhouettes, shadows cast against the tent by the moonlight met his eyes.

Is that.. guards?

Why would the bathing tent have.. Before he could decipher what was going on, Fai felt himself taking a sharp intake of air as the presence of another body previously oblivious to him was made known.

Every muscle that had been relaxed a moment ago rapidly tensed up in that instant.

He did not have to look to know who was standing behind him.

A/N:

Guess this is where major changes to my initial story begin! I'll try to write longer chapters k

Enjoy!