Chapter 16

*AUTHOR'S NOTE*

I'M BACK! :D

This will be the longest chapter I've written so far, and it's jam packed. Thank you to everyone who's stuck around through the long waits between chapters. You're the best :)

The next one after this will be the last chapter in the story.

Enjoy :)

*Trigger warning: tiny, tiny gore mention - probably nothing to be concerned about, but just in case!

Ford jumped, his inventions bouncing on his lap, as a loud boom of thunder suddenly rang out through the air. Looking up from his work for the first time in hours, he glanced up at the darkening sky above them.

Grey clouds swept across the horizon, consuming all daylight in their path. As raindrops started to patter against the windowpanes of the bus, a chill swept through the air, or at least it felt like it. Ford disregarded it as his gaze darted over suspiciously to Bill, as if the sudden change in weather was somehow his fault.

Cipher's demeanor didn't change though - his attention, or lack thereof, was directed out the window at the rushing change of scenery around them. They'd gone from busy, grey, depressing highways, to sparse, green, forest-lined roads. Gravity Falls was less than twenty minutes away by Stanford's estimation.

It wouldn't be long before the 'oddities' no one else seemed to notice would start popping up. With his highly trained, astute eyes, Ford could already make out common 'Falls' phenomena, such as four-leaf-clover-shaped patches of four-leaf-clovers, rocks that looked vaguely like hotdogs, and gnomes raining down from the sky…

Wait, WHAT?

Ford did a double take, staring up through the blurry bus window at the sky literally filled with flying gnomes.

Without a second thought, Ford dove for his journal, grabbing the chewed pen from his pocket excitedly and clicking it rapidly as he started to chuckle. Never in all his years of documentation on gnome behaviour had he ever seen anything like this! He quickly looked over to check if Bill had noticed the strange happenings as well.

From the corner of his gaze, it almost looked like Bill was smiling.

BUMP.

The riders collectively flinched as something hit the roof of the bus. Ford barely noticed, furiously scribbling notes down on a new journal page, the smell of ink on fresh parchment overriding his concern. An announcement came over the bus P.A.

"Err, ladies and gentlemen, there seems to be some, uh, unexpected hail in the forecast. Nothing to be alarmed about, I'm sure it'll pass soon."

Ford scoffed as he gazed up from the journal briefly and looked about at his fellow passengers. No one could possibly believe this was just hail… I mean, how blind would they have to be?

"Wow, look kids! Rare, red, pointy hail! You never see that in Portland!"

Ford shook his head incredulously as he started sketching the outlines of pointed hats falling from the sky. Another BUMP on the roof, and a BU-DUMP on the side of the vehicle. Ford looked up from his work for a second and wondered… were they aiming for the bus?

Practically on cue came the unmistakable sound of the bus' engine sputtering to a sudden halt. With a screech, the vehicle ground to a halt in the middle of the empty country road.

As soon as it had begun, the hail just stopped. Only the pattering of raindrops on the road remained.

Ford looked over curiously to the bus driver, who grumbled as he stood up and pulled the lever to open the doors, draping his jacket over his head before stepping out into the rain. Ford strained his neck to follow the driver's figure out the window, raindrops rolling over the glass. Even from his seat, he could see that the hood of the vehicle was smoking. He raised his thick eyebrows, almost certain he'd seen the driver chasing something away… The thunder rumbled again as Ford narrowed his eyes.

He didn't like this one bit.

The bus doors opened and the driver barreled up the steps, heaved over while he caught his breath, his jacket stained with raindrops.

"Ladies and gentlemen, we need to evacuate this bus immediately," the driver spoke rushedly, trying not to appear panicked as the passengers started to murmur amongst themselves. "Please, take only your essentials with you, and make your way off the vehicle in an orderly fashion!" Without another word, the driver frustratingly started dialing a number on his phone, no doubt the bus company so they could send another vehicle to pick up the passengers post-haste.

The bus-goers grumbled as they grabbed whatever they could carry and made their way off the bus. Ford swiftly grabbed a fistful of Stan's jacket as he personally escorted Bill off the vehicle, the demon staying silent as he snatched his new cane from the overhead bins, the air starting to smell like diesel.

Ford cringed as raindrops suddenly pattered against his head as he stepped down the rubber steps and onto the slick road. With his gaze squarely on Bill's shifting eyes, he and the other travelers made their way out onto the dirt road, gathering well away from bus as it smoked up like a signal fire. Part of Ford actually wondered if it was meant to be just that...

"What do you know about this, Bill?" Ford quickly asked him, turning away from the engine to stare down the demon with narrowed eyes. Bill yawned, taking another drink of his cold coffee while he casually leaned on his cane.

"Ever the conspiracy theorist, Fordsy," he smirked, wiping his lip as the smoke rose higher in the sky. "I suppose I've somehow caused the rain too?"

Ford grumbled. Even from a distance, Stanford could see large, pointed dents in the metal exterior of the vehicle. From the way the bus had stalled, it seemed like the gnomes had somehow stopped the flow of oxygen to the engine, but how?

His eyes widened as he spotted it: a red, conical hat sticking out of the exhaust pipe. It could only mean one thing.

Somewhere in the vicinity, there was a hat-less gnome running around.

In all his years of studying the creatures, he'd never once gotten close to their hats. He hadn't even been sure they could be removed, let alone what was under them. The scientist in him absolutely itched as he stared at the hat's plush outline, his iron-clad grip on Stan's jacket starting to loosen…

"What are you waiting for, Fordsy? A handwritten invitation?" Bill smirked. Ford glared at him.

"Oh, you'd like that, wouldn't you?" he snapped back at him, exhaling as he pinched the bridge of his nose with his free hand. He couldn't take down notes or make any kind of a decent sketch with one hand tied up…

Ford looked around at the passengers waiting by the side of the gravel road, and smiled as he noticed a responsible-looking, young couple standing under the bows of a redwood.

Perfect.

"You know what I need? A babysitter," Ford smirked as he quickly yanked the demon along, Bill growling in protest as they approached the couple and kicking up gravel like a petulant child.

"Excuse me, sir and madam! May I ask a favor of you two?" Stanford implored as he and Bill approached the couple, who both looked up at the brothers uneasily. "I'm conducting some research on the, uh, hail , and I was hoping you could watch over my brother for a few minutes! You see, how do I phrase this… my brother tends to have a bit of trouble in his old age when he's left alone." Bill shot Ford an absolutely murderous look as the couple nodded back sympathetically.

"We totally understand. We'd be happy to watch over your brother for you," the woman smiled as she patted Bill on the shoulder. He glared daggers at Ford as the young thirty-somethings started making forced small-talk with him, while Ford scurried off like an ecstatic school boy.

"I wonder if the hats are lined on the inside?! Maybe there'll be skin-cell samples!" he rambled to himself, grinning ear to ear. This research could be unprecedented! He could confirm dozens of theories about gnome origins with a single hat! He reached inside his jacket pocket and felt around for his journal, when something in his back pocket started vibrating .

He quickly realized it was his phone and took it curiously from his pocket, looking at the screen to see the caller ID. A picture of Dipper's smiling face appeared on the screen as the phone buzzed away. An uneasy feeling grabbed hold of him.

He quickly pressed 'TALK'.

"Hello? Dipper? Is everything alri-"

"What's the password?" came his great-nephew's voice hurriedly. Ford smiled at the boy's vigilance.

"Operation: Bill's a Big Fat Meany," he replied proudly. Letting Mabel choose the password had been Dipper's idea - brilliant . His great-nephew's heavy sigh suddenly carried over the line, and a feeling of absolute dread started creeping into Ford's gut...

"Dipper, what's going on?" he asked hesitantly. The boy took a deep breath before answering.

"Bill tried calling me from your phone early this morning."

"What?!" Ford burst out, quickly hushing himself before darting behind the smoking bus, away from Bill's prying eyes and ears. The demon could read lips, he was sure of that, and there was no way in hell he was going to let Bill catch wind of this. He squeezed his eyes shut as he tried to think clearly, composing his scattered thoughts as he leaned against the cold metal of the bus. Bill actually had the gall to try tricking Dipper and Mabel, luring them into danger right under his nose! "Dipper, tell me exactly what happened." Dipper swallowed the lump in his throat.

"Well, first of all, Bill was posing as you ," Dipper replied, sounding justly unnerved. Ford felt his stomach twist at the words. "He said something about you and Stan getting on an earlier flight home? And then he tried to convince me to come to Gravity Falls this morning with Mabel for Thanksgiving... He was laying on the flattery real thick too, I think he really wanted us to be there when you got into town…" Ford took a deep breath before asking the most terrifying question in the forefront of his mind.

"Dipper, you are still at home… right? " Ford asked anxiously, paralyzed with fear as he waited for Dipper's response...

"Yeah, of course!" Dipper said, and Ford sighed immediately as a huge weight lifted off his shoulders. The kids were safe, thank all 79 gods… "I'm almost completely sure, like 99%, maybe 97% sure, that Bill bought it. He probably thinks Mabel and I are in the shack right now, waiting for him..." Ford could hear Dipper shudder on the other end of the line.

"I'm so proud of you, Dipper. Well done," he congratulated the boy, his pride for his nephew briefly overriding his anxiety as he leaned against the back of the bus. "Are you… doing okay, son? You still want to watch the procedure tonight, right? Because I would completely understand if you were too rattled by all of this..."

"No, no, no! Believe me, Mabel and I have been through wayyy worse with Bill. I don't think anything could top last summer's, erm, events," Dipper coughed. "And trust me - we wouldn't miss tonight's big event for the world." Ford could practically feel Dipper smiling on the other end, before another voice suddenly cut through.

"DIPPER! YOUR WAFFLES ARE GETTING COLDDDDDD!" Mabel yelled, and Ford chuckled as Dipper groaned in annoyance.

"Ugh, I gotta go, Mabel made strawberry-butterscotch-candycorn waffles and I have to go choke them down," the boy grumbled. Ford laughed as he heard Waddles squealing in the background. "See you tonight, Grunkle Ford. And… good luck. Not that you'll need it, but… yeah."

"Not to worry my boy," Ford replied with a smirk, brushing off Dipper's nerves. "Should be one heck of an evening. I'll see you and your sister then."

With a press on the red 'END CALL' button, the line to his nephew cut and he was met with the pattering rain once more. He quickly pocketed the phone as he walked back around the bus to the tailpipe… only to find an empty socket.

His heart sunk like a stone as he quickly looked around the bus. No trail, no sign of any evidence... It was just gone.

There went his unprecedented research…

Gravel crunched underfoot as the bus driver suddenly meandered through the crowd, cupping his hands around his mouth before addressing the group of wet, shivering travellers. Rain patterned on Ford's damp hair as he turned towards the man.

"Kay, folks, I just heard back from the company," the driver announced, his voice raised over the din of the falling rain. "Looks like the next bus'll be here to pick us up in about half an hour." The passengers collectively groaned in annoyance as another boom of thunder rang out.

Fantastic - now he had another thirty minutes to stand in the rain with the demon that had just tried to ensnare his great niece and nephew for the up-teenth time...

He wandered back over to the side of road, only to balk in surprise at the absence of the young husband and his demon ward. Stanford's six-fingered hands began to shake.

"Where… where is he?" Ford managed to squeak out. The young woman politely smiled and shook her head.

"Oh don't worry, your brother's fine! He said he had to take care of business, if you know what I'm saying, so my husband took him off-road for a couple minutes. They should be back soon," she said calmly. Ford tried to breathe, reminding himself that they were currently stranded in the middle of the woods, and it's not like Bill had any other way of getting ho-

"Ahahaha… AHAHAHAHA!"

VROOM!

Ford ducked on instinct as an engine revved and a beat up motorcycle shot out of the woods, over Ford's head, and landed in a skid as it took off like a flash down the road.

The husband stumbled out of the woods, covered in wet leaves and mud, his jaw agape.

At least Ford wasn't the only one.

RRRRRIINGGG! RRRRRIINGGG! RRRRRRRRIINGGG!

"Wendy, can you pick up the phone?" Melody shouted across the giftshop, tourists clambering over each other to get their hands on the last snow globe while the woman fended them off with a broom. The cash register dinged as Wendy's red hair popped up among the crowd of customers.

"I'm a little busy right now!" she called back, running numbers under her breath as she counted out change and narrowly avoided someone sneezing on her. " Oh, gross!" The phone continued to ring. Melody grumbled under her breath.

"Soos? Can you get that?" she called out, starting to lose her patience as she barrelled through the small crowd and towards the back-room for a new box of panther shirts.

"Sure thing, honey!" Soos hollered back, handing a kid a Mr. Mystery bobblehead before skidding across the floor to the wall-phone. "Do-do-do-do… This is Mr. Mystery! How can we shock and/or confuse you today?"

"SOOS! Oh, thank god. This is Stanford. Listen, Soos - you need to close down the shack NOW," came Ford's panicked, heaving voice on the other end of the line. Soos furrowed his brow, and Wendy shot him a concerned look from behind the desk.

"Uh, yeah, sure, other Mr. Pines, but, uh… what's the password?" he asked hesitantly, biting his lip.

"Argh, Operation: Bill's a Big Fat Meanie! Now, Soos, I really need you to listen to m-"

"Oh, thank goodness!" Soos sighed, and he shouted over to his fiance as she came back in with the new box. "Hey, Melody! It's Stan's twin brother on the phone! You remember him, right? Six fingers, wrote the journals, kinda looks like the grumpy cat…"

"SOOS!" Ford interrupted, breathing heavily.

"Haha, sorry Mr. Pines Two. What's going on? You almost home? McGucket's been downstairs working on the machine all da-"

"Soos, please stop talking and listen to me!" Ford shouted, Soos silencing himself. "Bill is on his way to the Shack in Stan's body right now ." Soos turned white as a sheet. "Soos?" Melody slid in and gently took the phone from him.

"It's Melody," she replied quickly. "It's that triangular jerk, isn't it?"

"Yes. He's on his way to the shack on a motorcycle," Ford replied at rapid speed. "You'll see him coming a mile away - he's dressed in a black suit and tophat, the works. You know Bill's ego... Anyway, it's paramount that you evacuate any tourists - they could be in very real danger. I'll need Soos to come and pick me up immediately."

"Done," Melody replied, cool as a cucumber as she reached into her jeans pocket and pulled out the car keys to Stan's old car, tossing them to Soos, who managed to snap out of it and catch them midair. "He'll be fine - it's just you, anyways." She pointed at Wendy and made a motion to close up the till. Wendy nodded stiffly as the cash register dinged, slamming shut.

"Okay, people, party's over! And no refunds!" she called out, smirking a bit as she leaned back in the chair and put her feet up on the desk, people begrudgingly emptying out of the gift shop.

Soos dramatically took off his fez, grabbing his old hat off of Melody's head before placing it on his own. He clenched his jaw as he turned the cap around, narrowing his eyes.

"Soos time," he murmured heroically as he started making his way out to the car, before stopping in realization. "Haha, I don't even know where I'm going!"

"I'm on route 10, twenty minutes from town," Ford responded, overhearing.

"Route 10! Twenty minutes out!" Melody yelled as Soos took off like a flash, rushing leftover tourists out of the shop as he went. Melody took a deep breath, trying to calm her nerves. "Are you okay, Ford?"

"Frankly, not by a long shot," he replied stiffly, his teeth starting to chatter.

"We're gonna get him," Melody replied, solid as a rock as she clenched her fist. "We're ready for this. He's not going to hurt anyone, and we're going to get Stan back. I promise."

"I hope so," Ford replied back, shivering. "For all our sakes."

Dead, wet leaves slid under Bill's feet as he snickered, his tinny laughter carrying through the trees as walked the beat-up motorcycle further into the woods. His cane dragged behind him, tapping over every rock and pebble in his path. He shivered with fatigue, pressing onwards to the pile of leaves the gnomes had left for him to ditch his ride in. When all was said and done after the night was over, he'd need a getaway vehicle after all…

He turned his head at a rustling in the bushes, scowling as he grabbed his cane with both, wrinkly hands. He relaxed as several gnomes emerged from the thicket, and he stamped the tip of his cane back down into the dirt.

"Oh, thank Cthulhu, it's just you weirdos," he sighed, reaching into his suit-jacket. "I suppose you're here for your end of the deal?"

The gnomes narrowed their eyes, looking around briefly before nodding.

"You weren't followed?" a gnarly one of them asked. Bill scoffed.

"Please, the only other people who know about this dumb trading spot are ol' Red Ice, Grendo, and Sixer, and all of them are either in or currently en route to their dumb, hick town," he responded with an eye roll. "Now do you want the goods or not?"

The gnomes looked to one another before nodding, far too eager for their reward. The demon smirked.

Gently, Bill pulled out a small glass capsule from his suit jacket, twisted it open, and placed its seemingly invisible contents on the ground. The demon held out an open palm expectantly, and one of the gnomes handed him a small piece of a quartz-like stone.

Sticking his tongue out between his teeth in concentration, Bill caught a sunbeam in the gem's path and aimed it carefully at whatever had been in the container.

The gnomes cheered gleefully, gnashing their pointed teeth together as a wide-eyed, terrified Huldufolk woman grew before them. After just a few seconds, Bill pulled the stone out of the sunlight, and the Huldufolk woman settled at around the same height as the ecstatic gnomes. She looked around, bewildered and petrified, as the gnomes began to chant:

"Queen! Queen!"

The trunk of the Stanley-Mobile slammed shut, luggage stowed, and the passenger-side door flew open as lightning crashed in the distance. Ford slumped back in the car seat, dripping wet from the rain.

"Step on it," he growled. Soos nodded, his brow furrowed and his skin pale as he revved the gas pedal, speeding off towards town.

Bill dusted his hands off, pleased with himself, and whistled as he walked back towards the motorcycle he'd ditched in the pile of wet leaves. Rain trickled down from the treetops, spilling huge droplets of water all over his nice, new suit. He was in far too good of a mood to let the rain get him down, though.

Relishing the moment, Bill knelt down in the mud and slowly unbuckled the sachet on the side of the bike. His hand eagerly dove inside the fabric, and he grinned as he pulled out his smuggled goods from the carry-on, back from his time spent hidden in the airport bathroom.

A straight-edged razor, a can of hair gel, and a spare pair of Ford's gloves. He tossed them onto the ground, wet mud splattering in their wake.

He took a quick look down at his watch, stifling a yawn as he swore under his breath - he was behind schedule. He had to hurry this up.

His fingers worked quickly as he stood up and started undoing the buttons of his suit jacket, peeling it off in one fluid motion, and exposing Ford's stolen, red sweater underneath it. Bill could hardly contain himself as he untucked the turtleneck, pulling it up as he laughed.

KNOCK. KNOCK. KNOCK.

Wendy and Melody both jumped at the sudden rapping at the door, Wendy almost falling off her chair behind the register. They both shot each other an anxious glance from across the giftshop.

DING DONG, DING DONG, DING DONG, DING DONG...

"I'm coming! Geez," Melody muttered as she made her way over to the door. She reached for the doorknob, but stopped herself, her intuition warning her of something... She peered through the dusty peephole first.

Red turtleneck, six-fingered gloves, and an upturned, fluffy cowlick of grey hair.

She breathed a sigh of relief as she stood up straight and swung open the door.

"Oh, thank goodness you're here in one piece," Melody sighed as she pulled him into a bear hug, Ford's sweater soaked with rain. The man nodded as he patted her on the back comfortingly and pulled away, adjusting his glasses and quickly shutting the door.

"I'll feel better once we have Bill contained in the shack," he said, trying not to sound panicked as the door squeaked shut. "Any sign of him yet?" Melody shook her head as Wendy looked on from across the shop, leaning against the back wall.

"No, nothing…" Melody replied, worrisome as she squeezed her crossed arms. She looked over to Wendy. "Could you grab Stanford a towel from the laundry room?" The teenager hesitated for a moment before nodding to her boss, looking for a second too long at Ford before disappearing into the house.

Ford and Melody stood in silence, Ford's eyes downcast. Something felt… off , but Melody quickly put it up to anxiousness, one attributed to a distinct lack of her fiance ...

"That's weird… is Soos still bringing in you guys' things?" she asked hesitantly.

"Oh, yes, not to worry," Ford replied with a nod, trying to control his shivering. "There's quite a few artifacts in our suitcases so they're quite heavy. I asked him to set them down in my study for now, but it might take him a moment - most of the samples in the cooler bag have to be stored in the fridge and labelled. You do not want to mix up regular cow's milk with unicorn blood, let me tell you," he chuckled. Melody chuckled back awkwardly in response.

Wendy strode back into the shop not a moment too soon, tossing an old towel to Stanford, who grinned devilishly as he caught it midair. "I want to say… Wanda?" The redhead narrowed her eyes.

"Wendy," she replied, deadpan as he dried himself off, the towel picking up mud from his sweater.

"Wendy! Yes, of course! My apologies," he replied nonchalantly, before cocking an eyebrow as he draped the towel over his shoulders. "By the way, I've been meaning to ask… where are the children? I half expected Dipper at least to come barrelling in here with a notepad and pen by now…" The two women looked to each other blankly.

"Dipper and Mabel aren't here," Melody replied, to which the man stood up a little taller. "Didn't they let you know they'd be watching the big night over the webcam?"

In a blink of her narrowed eyes, Wendy was certain she saw the man twitch.

"Must've slipped my mind!" Stanford replied, shaking his head. "These last few days have been, well, disorienting to say the least. It might be best if I head downstairs for a moment and take a quick look at the machine, say hello to my old partner and all that..."

"I thought you said catching Bill running around with Stan's body was the highest priority right now?" Wendy cut him off sharply, glaring at the man. Stanford blinked back owlishly as Wendy suddenly took a threatening step towards him. She halted in surprise as Melody's steadying hand fell onto her flanneled shoulder.

"Stanford's had a rough couple of days, Wendy. Why don't we give him some space, huh? Let him have a moment with an old friend?" she suggested. Wendy sighed, before crossing her arms in resignation.

Melody gave the man a small nod, and watched as he quickly made his way over to the vending machine and inputted the code. With a billow of smoke, the machine slid to the side, revealing the staircase beyond it.

"Just yell down when Soos is done!" he yelled up, his figure disappearing into the shadows of the staircase.

It was Melody who noticed it first, squeezing Wendy's shoulder with widened eyes as she noticed the flash of silver in Stanley's gloved hand…

The vending machine shut against the wall with a heavy thud, and Bill finally let out a frustrated sigh, before clenching his hands until the knuckles ran white, slamming his fist against the drywall.

"Ford's gonna pay for this," the demon snarled, dust shaking down from the walls around him.

The stairs creaked beneath his feet as he descended deeper into the shack. Spiders scattered from their cobwebs at the sight of him, the straight razor in Bill's left hand catching the light from the single lightbulb dangling above the narrow passageway. Bill slowly ran Stanley's palm against the sharpened tip of the blade, drawing ruby red droplets of blood as he growled.

"I mean, what's the point of all this if I don't even get to take out one of Pine Tree's eyes?"

The razor glinted under the crackling light as Bill approached the elevator, and found at least something to smile about: the first to suffer for Sixer's little trick would be good old Spectacles…

Ear pressed against the peeling wallpaper, Melody furrowed her brow.

"I think he's gone…" she murmured, her hand caressing the barrel of Ford's emergency weapon. She looked back to Wendy, cellphone pressed to the teen's ear. "Any luck reaching McGucket?" Wendy let out a frustrated sigh, shaking her head as she hung up.

"Straight to voicemail again. There must be no service down there," Wendy answered, her hands trembling as she stuffed the phone back in her pocket. "We have to move now, or Fiddleford's toast."

Melody nodded stoically, her fingers flying as she inputted the code. The machine slid aside and, with a nod, the two women slipped into the narrow passageway and disappeared into the darkness.

Sparks flew throughout the darkened lab as Fiddleford concentrated, his tongue poking out as he precisely cut through a length of steel. The thought of dismantling the portal only to build some other hell-bound machine turned his stomach, but he couldn't let it break his focus. He coughed through the dusty haze of the room as he steadied his hand. Any minute now, an incapacitated demon would be entering their midsts once again, and they had to be ready...

The man flinched at the sudden sound of footsteps by the door. It couldn't already be time… no one had told him they were home yet! He lowered his emerald tinted glasses, taking a deep breath before he turned around, only to meet the single figure of his old friend.

"Hi, F.," Ford said, a tired smile on Stanford's face. "Good to see you again…"

"Where is he?" Fiddleford asked bluntly, not wasting any time. "We're behind schedule and we need to get him locked away for a few more hours 'til the machine's been tested..."

"Not to worry, we've got him in the car for now. Even Bill can't get past child-proof locks," Ford chuckled as he walked towards him. Fiddleford's thick eyebrows furrowed.

"Well, I'll feel a whole lot better once we get him in the containment vessel," he muttered, eyes downcast. "Let me just finish up this piece and I can brief you on the adjustments I've made…" Stanford took another step closer, one hand held behind his back.

"Of course, of course," Ford spoke slowly, stepping towards the machine as he took a good, long look at it.

It was far larger than he'd imagined, sprawling throughout the basement in a tangle of wires and pipes, with what looked to be a large generator in the middle. At the end of the machine sat a metal chair with a clamping helmet held above it, along with a small glass chamber on the other side. That was undoubtedly where the separation of man and demon would occur, or at least that's what it was meant to do…

"You've done a fine job, F.," Ford cooed, taking in the expert craftsmanship. "You look like you're doing well, too. It's so good to see."

"Yeah, well, gettin' back your sanity and livin' in a highfalutin mansion will do that to ya," McGucket replied as he raised his spectacles back to eye level again, inspecting his handiwork. "After this nightmare is over with, I'd love to have y'all over for Thanksgivin' dinner. The house is mighty quiet all by my lonesome, especially after the wife and I went our separate ways…"

"Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that," Ford said, shaking his head as he moved closer to the man, trying desperately to hide his creeping grin. "And nothing would make me happier, old friend." At that, he figured a smile seemed sincere enough not to hide anymore, and Ford outstretched his arms towards his old friend, awaiting a hug... and that one moment that would at least start to make this all seem better. McGucket hesitated, looking to his old research partner for a second. Something about the lights in the lab were making Ford look almost... yellow...

He disregarded it, and opened up his arms.

Ford smiled.

"It's good to see you, partner," McGucket sighed as he felt himself being pulled towards the man... when suddenly, he stopped, narrowing his eyes at something in front of him. Stanford cocked his head, noticing something...

In the green tint of Fiddleford's glasses, Bill could see Wendy's reflection by the door.

The demon's eyes widened in shock as he spun around.

"Gotcha!" Wendy cried triumphantly from the doorway, as a net launched out from the barrel of her weapon and flung onto Stan's body. Bill roared as he fell to the ground, suddenly tangled up in ropes. "McGucket, it's Bill! Get outta there!" Bill struggled futilely, trying desperately to untangle his legs, when suddenly a mad smile overtook his face. He laughed wildly as he realized he still had his blade… he could cut through the damn thing! It wasn't too late!

"You want to do the honors, Wendy?" Melody asked, narrowing her eyes as Bill tried to hacksaw his way out of the trap.

"My pleasure," Wendy answered through gritted teeth, flipping up a panel on the underside of the barrel, exposing a big red button. Bill's eyes met hers, his pupils shrinking in sudden terror as she pressed it.

"No, no, no!"

Bill grit his teeth as the net sprang to life with electricity, immediately incapacitating his useless vessel. He flailed wildly beneath it, and McGucket turned away, unable to watch. Stan's body suddenly collapsed on the ground with a dull thump. Out cold, the shining razor flung from his still-jittering hand, the weapon skidding across the ground with a clatter.

The room collectively breathed a sigh of relief.

"You take his arms, I'll get his feet," Melody spoke, motioning to Wendy, who nodded. "Is the holding cell ready for him, Fidds?" she asked, looking to McGucket, who still looked rightfully shaken.

"Yes ma'am," he replied, a bead of sweat falling from his brow. "I'm gonna need Stanford's help setting up the lie detector though, it's a bit finicky. Ya know, the real Stanford."

"I'll give him a call, he'll want to know about this immediately," Melody spoke, shaking her head in disbelief as she picked up Stanley's limp feet.

"There's no need for that," someone spoke from behind them. Wendy, Melody, and McGucket all spun around towards the sound of the voice, the women rather unceremoniously dropping Stan's limbs back onto the ground in their surprise.

The elevator doors shut, and before them stood Soos, and a dripping wet, furious, exhausted, wrathful, and very real, Stanford Pines. Soos looked worriedly to Stanley's collapsed body beneath the net and bit his lip.

"Uh, he's gonna be okay... right dudes?" he asked.

"Not to worry, Soos - Stan's going to be just fine," Ford said, his hands landing confidently on his hips. "Alright everyone, you know the plan. Let's get to work."