Hey guys! do you know how happy your reviews made me? SKY HIGH! emegesh ! I really wanted to update within a week but a lot happened, a new member of the family was added. too busy taking care of her.. Anyways, I did this because you made me so happy :) This may not as be much funny, i dunno,. i have a lot of things on my mind,.. one of them is the fact i havent been able to read manga recently ... anyways

(c) Disclaimer: No one owns Gintama.

Chapter 2

Just another day as the captain

Women are vain, devious, wicked and dangerous creatures. But there is one who ranks at an entirely different level; the gluttonous, loudmouthed harpy, china beast of the Shinsengumi –"Yato Kagura".

Hearts –that was the only word that came to Okita Sougo's mind as he stared at the pink envelop sitting prettily at Yato Kagura's computer desk. He had purposely woken up early to finish his duties, and decided to start his day by piling up files and reports on his secretary's desk. What he didn't expect to find was a pink, very offending envelop which somewhat strangely resembled a finely crafted handmade love letter.

Denial– 'Impossible', there was no way that –that- batshit crazy banshee of doom would ever get a love letter, or more so an admirer. The odds of someone liking the china beast was like getting the winning lottery ticket, or surviving a 100m dive in a volcano, or a bald guy growing his hair back–a chance of one in a million.

Anger– so if that's true, then those bastards are just probably playing with her? Lifting her hopes up and then laughing at her once she hits the cold hard dirt filled ground? Their impure desire to humiliate china in such a deceitful manner is unforgivable and that these bastards deserve a one way ticket to Hijikata's hellish training routine.

Depression– What should he do? There is nothing he can do... he has no rights to meddle into the romantic relationships of his subordinates. Even as the captain of the first division, why does he feel so helpless? What would be the point of it all anyway? Would china be better off feeling joy after reading the letter then sadness after the revealing of the truth or should he throw away the letter and never let the girl feel the ecstatic experience of falling in love and regret.

Acceptance– No, it's going to be okay. China is stronger than what she looks like and her will is even stronger. These things happen inevitably and people must go through such challenges and be melded into a person who can surpass and triumph in the future.

– Okita Sougo, captain of the first division of the Shinsengumi has just gone through four stages of grief in over 5 minutes.

"Oi, Sadist you're up early!" speak of the devil. "Oh, what were you staring at?" she moved close towards her desk to inspect whatever it was that was fascinating enough to have caught the eyes of the Prince of the planet of Sadist. "Ugh! Another one? They keep mistaking my desk for Soyo-chan's, must be from a different division. You know the last time my desk was littered with flowers, not just any flowers, Roses! All kinds of color as well! My computer smelled like a garden for a week. I think I developed allergies after that. W-what's with that look?"

Okita Sougo, Age 24 is currently grieving his dying brain. "Did I actually felt pity for china back there? Did she just unknowingly humiliate me! Am I losing my sadistic touch? Its all definitely china's fault." He has mastered the phases of grief so much it only took him 5 seconds that time."Hello? Earth to sadist? Stop staring blankly into space or else people will think you're an idiot."

"China when are you gonna grow up?"

"When are you gonna get a girlfriend?" tsk.. Her mouth was automatic, like the machine that throws the balls at a batting centre. "Maybe you should take it easy on your 'alone time' and start taking proper sleep at night. With that, you no longer have to take naps during the day!"

"China I'll sue you for this type of harassment. Anyways, so the letter is not yours?"

"Eh?! Did you actually think that letter was mine? Hah! Serves you right for piling your workload on my desk again." She chuckled exhibiting a wide toothy grin.

"You don't want to work? I'll take that indolence of yours and turn you to a workaholic. And what kind of idiot even in their right mind would think that you of all people would receive a love letter?"

"Wha- I'm not indecent! And I get them too you know!"

"I said Indolence! Not Indecency! Are you doing that on purpose?!" He snorted "You have no sex appeal, you dress like my grandmother, and your face looks like that of a housewife with 9 children and is that this morning's breakfast I see stuck between your teeth?" Okita Sougo was a demon whose mouth needs not any brakes.

"Jerk, basking in the glory of your new found reputation as a male reproductive organ I see." At least the china girl had hers on filter. "You kiss your mother with that mouth of yours?" His eyes twitched. She winced at the realization; Sougo no longer had a mother, but neither did she.

"Listen China, in this world there are three kinds of people. Those who follow the rules, those who go by no rules and those who make the rules; I am the last. I do what I want, and you do as I say, finish those reports by lunch." Despite Sougo's tough exterior, he was soft and vulnerable in the inside. He was like a snail, a gross slimy squishy snail that protects himself from the cold harsh outside world.

Mother,... His mother was the daughter of a rich noble. She was kind, intelligent and caring. She was gentle, the type to never lash out on servants no matter what mistakes they did. She was understanding and compassionate, she treated everyone in the household as family even a dog like Hijikata was treated as her own son. How could such a beautiful and graceful woman have such demons for children, one would never know. But all things had their flaws, hers was her bad health. She was sickly and no amount of medicine could cure her. Her time had ended.

Sougo was nothing like his mother. He was not kind, nor caring or loving. He found it hard to understand mistakes and forgive faults. He found it hard to see Hijikata – the dog who stole his own sister from him even before he was born– as a person. He was strong and sturdy, a murderer who sought out the blood of his enemies. Yet he was a splitting image of her, from his red crimson eyes down to his dusty flaxen hair. Would it hurt to be like his mother? Would it hurt to forgive? Would it hurt to treat Hijikata as a per– . Would it hurt to ... love?

Lunch was just about over and he was tired of lollygagging on this cherry tree branch. Maybe it was about time to check on the vermillion haired harpy and see how much work was left. After all there is no way she finished all of those paper works. He walked through the corridors and stopped right at the door when he heard two voices.

"Hey... Soyo-chan? How do you become pretty?" The girl asked, hesitantly. Not sure if she wants to take it back or to just bury herself alive. Kagura had the reputation of being a beast, a girl with monstrous strength. She could break an ordinary man's legs if she was ordered to do a lap dance. Her digestive organs were are wide as the universe, she could eat thrice a mans usual meal and still have room for desert. When she was a child, she did not fuss about boys, or dresses or make up. She was left alone at an early age. Sakata Gintoki took her in. He became her foster parent. The silver perm was lazy, and didnt pay the rent on time. But she had fun with him and Shinpachi, a boy who worked at the Odd Jobs shop. Shinpachi was like a brother to her, as the Yorozuya trio she felt at home. She didn't feel the need for anything else. When Gin-chan decided to kick her out -It was just a joke but still he was right, she couldn't stay there forever- she had to find a new job. That is when she decided to pursue her long time dream.

"Kagura-chan! You're already pretty! You don't need to receive a lot of letters, just believe in yourself!" Soyo was the type to believe in inner beauty and that every person is special, unique. One cannot compare someone with another and say they are better. "Thanks"

"Now, can we please go eat? Lunch break is almost over." So they skipped lunch to finish his stupid reports. He wasn't aware he had a conscience until now. "Go ahead, I'll catch up, I still have a few more to finish."

"Are you sure? Alright then, make sure you get to eat ok?". Kagura? Not eat? That has never been heard of."Yep!" Maybe Sougo has been a little too hard, even on china. Everyone feared him, everyone obeyed him, but only china made him laugh, or feel humiliated. If you think about it, only china shared the same sadistic passion as him when it came to torturing other people either physically or mentally. They had polar opposites of each other in some ways yet had so much in common in other areas that it scared him, it frightened him, and it made him feel like an idiot.

Maybe it wouldn't hurt to be like his mother, just once.

"Hey china! Why don't you go to lunch, I'll finish the rest." The china girl whipped her head at the sound of his voice, teary eyed she stood up and faced him. "Sadist,.. you jerk! You come back now when I finished typing the last sentence!? Take this! Horyaa!" With a jab of her elbow to his stomach and a knee to his groin she bolted out of the room. The words S-U-C-K-E-R, ringing in the corridor halls. Now he'll never get a girlfriend, If he becomes a defective product china is gonna have to take responsibility.

It turns out it would hurt him to be just like his mother...

(A/N): R&R if you may,. Updates are still a cloudy vision as usual. But hey soon you'd be tired of my stupid weird humor and drop me like a new born baby elephant and I wouldnt write fics out of pressure anymore.! Ha.. ha..ha... I apologize. please keep supporting this useless author...