A/N – Again, thank you all for all the love for this story. One thing I am going to apologise for is making Leon nasty in the last chapter, I needed the barricade for Tony to stand up and say I want to do this – now looking back I regret it, so I will right this wrong in a few chapters time and I have come up with a reason why! Anyway, here is onto chapter 3 – a tough emotional one for our Tony :(

Disclaimer – I do not own NCIS – only original characters

Even after all this time?

Chapter 3

It had been an hour since Special Agent Anthony Dinozzo's world yet again came crashing down around him, she was in trouble again, she was missing again, she even may be dead again. Images of Somalia came flooding back he couldn't go back to that place again he couldn't face the not knowing of if she was alive or dead. It was now starting to hit him that she was in trouble and even after 2 and half years of no contact he knew he needed to find her, he didn't care that at the end she would push him away again, all he wanted to do was make sure she was safe.

"Now you need to run through all the information you have on the mission and the area that they have entered and, we need to brief Ellie and Abby and everyone" Tim started, he took a seat opposite Orli as she passed around the other files that were in her bag.

"Well shall we go down to the bull pen and you can pull up on the TV?" Orli asked, Tim nodded and both teams were now making their way-out Director Vance's office and down to the bull pen.

Tim noticed that Tony wasn't following, he nodded for Orli and the other Mossad agents to head down as he went to find Tony, walking back in he saw Tony sat on the chair still staring at Ziva's picture that was still in the table.

"Hey come on Tony" Tim shouted a little, Tony didn't look up and just kept staring at the picture and re playing over the last moments they had together "you are so loved" he closed his eyes and took a deep breath

"What if she is dead or what if we find her and she doesn't want to see us, it's been two years Tim and we just turn up hey Ziva we are here to rescue you but don't worry I am fine" Tony raised his voice a little

"Wait, you said you would help Tony" Tim was now confused at what is friend was getting at

"I know I did Tim but this has come around all at the wrong time, what do I say to Amber, heck I am getting married in two months" Tony sighed he leant against the back of the chair and looked up "I cannot hurt Amber in all of this Tim, but I need to…" he trailed off trying to find the right words to explain his emotions.

"You need to find Ziva, Tony it always has been and will always be Ziva for you" Tim finished off what Tony was trying to say "Look go home and speak to Amber and explain everything I think she will be ok and in the mean time I will talk to Bishop and Abby and fill them in – we need to pull together on this one we can't lose her again" Tim finished and made his way out the office.

Arriving into the bull pen word must have reached quicker than expected as Tim had a very frantic Abby jumping on the spot and a very confused Ellie on the other. Looking around he noticed that Boss was missing but he knew from experience was best not question.

"Abbs can you calm down for a second and listen to me, yes Ziva is in trouble along with a Navy reservist called Jennifer we need to find them as quick as possible, Orli and her team from Mossad have all the information and are going to share this with us, Ellie I need you to speak to friends at the NSA and DEA, any information on drug cartels using violence in the Mexico/Guatemala boarder we need to gather as much intel to help us locate them" Tim now sat behind his desk quickly started typing and something appeared on the screen it was the shot of Ziva and Jennifer together smiling before they set off on their mission. For Ellie this was the first time she saw a proper picture of Ziva that wasn't an official government issued one.

"Tim where is Tony and Gibbs?"

"Tony has gone home he needs to sort something out and Gibbs I don't have a clue" Tim shrugged

"This cannot be happening not now" Abby started to jump up and down on the spot again "How is Tony doing? What are we going to do? What if she is actually dead? I mean not like last time dead but then turned up alive but I mean what if she is 100% dead what we going to do" Abby finished as she looked around the bull pen as all eyes now lay on her.

"Miss Scuito, we all know Ziva is a strong woman I am sure she is alive and looking after Jennifer" Orli smiled at the forensic scientist. Abby gave a small nod and ran off down to her lab, she knew this was going to be all hands-on deck.

"Let's get started, shall we? We will fully brief when Tony is back but for now let's see what we can find out" Tim stated as all team members got to work.

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Opening the door to his apartment he was instantly hit with the fresh smell of home cooked Italian food, taking a deep breath he relaxed a little at the comforting smell that welcomed him home – then he realised it was the middle of the day and no one should have been home. He carefully closed his front door placed his coat down and headed towards the kitchen area. Standing in the door way he stayed quiet for a second as he watched his fiancé dance around the kitchen as she was preparing the food, turning around she jumped as she saw Tony watching her from the door way.

"Bloody hell hun" Amber panted a little awaiting her heart rate to slow down from the shock

"Uh sorry I didn't realise you were home" Tony started nodding towards the food "thought you were in work" he finished as he sat on the bar stool by the Island

"Well I decided to work from home today, thought I would make you a nice dinner, seem a little stressed lately" Amber softly smiled as she went back to chopping the peppers Tony watched for a while. Guilt was now washing through him with every little action she was doing and every smile that she sent his way. "So, boss sent you home early?" Amber asked for a while, Tony shook his head and sighed, he raked his hand through his hair and took a few deep breaths.

"I need to talk to you Amber, there is a case that has come up that will take me out the country for a while" Tony started, Amber instantly took note of his tone and stopped what she was doing, cleaning herself up a little took a seat opposite her husband to be and nodded at him.

"Okay, and how long you due to be away?" Amber started

"Well, there is a missing Navy reservist and she has been kidnapped we think somewhere in Guatemala, my team has been tasked to go and find them" Tony stopped and took a long look at the woman sat opposite him "There was someone else who was kidnapped as well" Tony trailed off, Amber nodded along to what he was saying and reached over to hold his hand, she gave him a little squeeze and a warm smile.

"And this other person kidnapped?" Amber asked softly, Tony took a deep breath and squeezed her hand back her he spoke

"Ziva" It was barely audible but Amber heard loud and clear. Tony was shocked though when she didn't remove her hand or start yelling, she raised from her seat and now sat next to Tony. Studying him for a little while she knew he feared talking to her about this.

"So, what has to happen?" Amber asked after a while, Tony finally looked to his right and watched as he fiancé again gave him a warm smile.

"I don't have to go, the team have said it fine for me to stay behind, we get married in two months" Tony smiled a little. He hated that he was lying to her a little about the situation but he just couldn't tell her outright that he was leaving to find another woman.

Reaching out and playing with the hair on the back of his head Amber gave him a small nod and hummed a little, she knew where this was going to go, she knew this conversation was the start of the end of them as a couple, she knew deep down he was going to be distracted until he got word of her safe return, she didn't blame him though, the way he spoke about her that time, he was in love and it was obvious. Amber took a deep breath and wiped away the tear that now was escaping from her eyes.

"Listen Tony, you need to go and you need to find her and make sure that she is safe along with the poor Navy girl" Amber whispered, tears were now falling thick and fast and Tony noticed the change of her tone, looking up he couldn't bare that she was now crying, pulling her into a hug he stroked the back of her head. A huge sudden guilt feeling washed over him, he couldn't go through with it, he couldn't break her heart and leave her.

"I am not leaving you Amber" Tony whispered, Amber nodded and pushed away a little from Tony their faces now facing each other. Searching his eyes, he could see the pain and the conflict in his eyes.

"You have to Tony, she needs you, if I had the chance to bring back Louis I would do anything to do that and you now have this chance" Tony wiped away the tears still staining her face as a pang of guilt again rushed through him, Amber vary rarely spoke about her first love. He died in a car accident years ago, he was driving from London to Bristol in the UK to surprise her and propose to her when a drunk driver crashed into him and instantly killed him. Amber ever only spoke about him once and once was all she could do.

"I can't do this to you Ambs, I cannot hurt you like this" Tony whispered, shaking her head, a little sob/laugh escaped as she cradled his face with her warm hands.

"You won't hurt me, I know and have always known deep down that Ziva is the one for you and I am not going to stop you from going after her, she needs you and right now you need to know she is safe" Amber smiled again with now a fresh set of tears falling down her cheeks, mirroring Tony's that had now started to fall, she pulled his face closer so their foreheads were touching. "I will always love you Special Agent" she whispered. Tony closed his eyes a little and took a few deep breaths. "Just not the right time for us that's all" Amber finished and she placed the lightest of kisses on his lips. Tony nodded and opened his eyes and smiled at the woman who he did genuinely love.

"I will always love you Ambs" Tony mumbled, they both remined still a little enjoying the last moments of closeness.

Finally Amber pulled away and wiped her eyes a little, she stood up and headed out the kitchen towards the living room, taking a seat on the sofa she stared at one of the many pictures on the wall of their apartment, her eyes lay onto one particular picture of her and her family with Louis in the background she gave a small smile as memories flooded back of all the amazing times they had together. Tony stood in the door way watching.

"Are you going to be ok?" Tony asked shifting on the spot

"Of course, I'm heading back to London next week anyway for the work meetings, I am going to see if I can transfer back" Amber smiled, standing back up she walked back over to Tony and traced his outline of his jaw with her finger "Just promise me on thing? If you find her, don't let her go ok?" Tony nodded and pulled her into a hug

"You are amazing Amber Louise Robinson" Tony smiled. Pulling back for the final time she winked at him

"Now get out of here, your team needs you" She smiled.

A/N Oh Amber – you broke my heart :( Anyway, again this is just another filling in chapter, next one we get into the proper stuff and Gibbs has gone to visit someone from the past – hmm! I am having so much fun with this and I do hope you are all enjoying as much as I am writing it! Please leave a review and let me know guys you are all just the best!

Happy Sunday guys

Nat x