A/N: As always, thank you thank you THANK YOU for your reviews, guys. They are so awesome. I love you all. Seriously.
It's time for the plot to thicken, don't you think? Who has blood on his (or her) hands? Let's find out…
The usual disclaimer applies.
Norma looks around. Her dress lies on the armchair, joined by Alex's shirt. His jacket and pants are on the floor next to their shoes. Her coat is… somewhere and her underwear is nowhere to be seen. Well, they made it to the couch at least.
"Your bedroom is upstairs?" She rests her chin on Alex's chest, smiling at him.
"Yeah. Wanna see it?" Norma didn't know Alex was able to grin so broadly.
She sits up. "Next time. Right now you'd have to carry me upstairs because I'm not sure my legs are functioning properly anymore. Where is my bra?"
He chuckles, fumbling around with the pillow he is lying on, pulling out black lace. "Here. And here..." He picks something up from the floor. "...are your panties. Do you have to put that on? I would prefer to carry you upstairs."
Norma bites her lower lip, his open display of desire reflected on her face for a split second before she pulls herself together. "I have to go." She takes bra and panties, leaning forward to kiss Alex. "It's dinner time. My boys will wonder where I am."
His hand rests between her shoulder blades, gently pushing her back down on his chest. "Don't go yet."
"Alex..." Norma giggles as she continues to kiss him and at the same time manages to wriggle herself out of his grip. "I have to, okay? I'm a mother." She gets up to get dressed.
"Will you tell your sons about us?"
Norma freezes in the middle of pulling her dress over her head before she turns around to look at Alex. "Yes. Yes, I will. Tonight. No more secrets. I don't..." She takes a deep breath. "There have always been secrets in my life and I don't want that anymore. I want this to be a new start."
Alex reaches out to take her hand. "You're aware we're going to be the talk of the town for a while?"
But Norma only shrugs and raises her eyebrows. "So what? Your ex girlfriends will bitch about me?" She intertwines their fingers, brushing his knuckles with her lips. "Let them." Her coat has been lying behind the couch. She takes it as well as her bag, leaning in for another kiss. "I'll call you."
He holds on to her hand. "Will you promise me something?"
Norma's expression becomes wary and Alex realizes what a balancing act this is despite the levity of the moment. Her willingness to reveal their relationship to her sons and everyone else proves that Norma is ready for a serious commitment. However, anything constricting her freedom, at least from her perspective, crosses an invisible line that's still there.
"Will you tell me when you're feeling worse or if you experience another blackout?" Alex asks, anyway, preparing for rejection.
She hesitates but nods. "Yeah, I will."
And then Norma is gone, leaving a whiff of cold air behind that came in when she opened the front door. Alex rests his head on the pillow that still smells like her. His bed is way more comfortable, but he will sleep on the couch tonight.
To her surprise, Dylan's car is parked next to hers when Norma arrives. Both of her sons are home. That is convenient.
"Where have you been?" Norman holds her a little too tight before she even can take off her coat. For a moment, she fears he is able to smell Alex on her since she can't smell anything else than his aftershave and this scent that is essentially him.
"Out, running some errands."
He looks around. "What did you buy? I don't see any bags."
Norma takes off her coat, putting on her apron. "I didn't buy anything."
"But what did you..."
"Norman!" she stops him. "I was out. There was something I had to do. Just leave it be, okay?" Norma saw the three missed calls when she checked her phone on her way home, all three from Norman during the last hour. She had switched her phone to silent when she had been waiting for Alex, aware what would happen next.
This isn't going to be easy. Then again, she didn't expect it to be.
"Would you lay the table, please?" Norma says in a soothing voice. "And tell Dylan that dinner will be ready soon."
Throughout preparing supper Norma considers not telling her sons about Alex, no matter what she told him she would do. But it feels so good when she's with him, so right, how can it be wrong? She has been putting her needs on the back burner for too long. It's her turn now; she is allowed to have a life.
After she served Dylan and Norman dessert, Norma sits down, folding her hands in her lap. It's one of her favorite desserts, chocolate pudding, but she isn't hungry, didn't eat much, anyway.
"I need to tell you something."
They both look at her in anticipation since an announcement from Norma Bates can mean anything. Their scrutinizing gaze makes Norma uncomfortable. Why does it feel like a confession? She hasn't done anything wrong.
"I, um, Alex and I, um, the sheriff." God, she needs to stop rambling. Norma straightens herself. "We're together." Short and sweet. Maybe that's the best way to tell them.
Dylan looks at her for a moment and then continues to eat whereas Norman keeps staring at her for what feels like forever before he pushes his spoon through the wobbly surface of the pudding with full force, his lower jaw grinding when he chews the pudding as if the act meant destroying his worst enemy. Norma watches him in silence for a while before she gives in.
"Norman?"
"What?"
"Is there something you want to say?"
"No."
"Are you sure?"
Dylan puts his spoon down and stands up. He doesn't want to be there when the fight between his mother and brother will erupt.
"I'll be in my room," he states, pointing upstairs although they ignore him. He didn't expect anything else.
"This is a mistake, mother." Norman says just as Dylan leaves the room.
"Oh and you are so sure about that because…?" Norma won't back off. Not this time. Dylan can hear it in her voice. Norman is her everything, but now there is another man. Everyone could see it coming.
"Because he is the sheriff and investigates you." Matt Weary. The investigation is still ongoing.
"Oh please. He's not investigating me. He actually helped me."
That shuts Norman up for a moment before he speaks again, his voice ice-cold, "Oh, yeah? And what's he going to make you do so that he doesn't investigate you? Is that where you were? Why you were late?"
Dylan closes the door of his room so that the yelling downstairs turns into muffled words he can't understand anymore. The screaming goes on for quite a while until Norman runs up the stairs, slams the door behind him and locks himself in. Norma follows not until later. Her steps are slow, exhausted almost, stopping at Norman's door, however not knocking before she walks on to her room, also closing the door behind her. Dylan always sleeps with his door closed, as opposed to Norma and Norman who always keep theirs open. It feels weird that they are so isolated. Dylan briefly considers to check on Norma, but then he simply stands up and opens his door before he goes back to bed and falls asleep immediately.
Norma's phone rings when she is in the bathroom, putting on her make-up. It's Alex.
"Hi, hon." She is so happy to hear his voice. The fight with Norman was awful; she didn't sleep well. Then she realizes the line is silent and she called him honey. Maybe that was…
"Hi," he responds softly, definitely not sounding as if he minded. "I just wanted to check on you."
"It's all good." But Norma knows why he called. "I told them yesterday." She pauses.
"And?"
"It, um… Dylan is okay with it."
"And Norman?"
She sighs. "He wasn't excited, but he'll come around and accept it. It's not as if he has a choice."
"I'm sorry that this is so difficult."
"It's not your fault," Norma assures him.
"Let me know if I can do anything."
"Yeah. I will."
Even though the call brought up the memories of her fight with Norman, Norma smiles at her reflection in the mirror after they hung up. It felt like an ordinary call, like a thing couples do. She could get used to that. Norma opens the bathroom door and bumps into Norman.
"Why are you still wearing your pajamas? You have to go to school." She wonders if he sneaked around and listened to her talking to Alex on the phone.
Norman is still angry at her, the tension in his body finding its way in his voice when he replies, "I forgot to tell you. I don't have to go to school today. We're supposed to write an essay about the work of one of our parents or a friend and I thought..." He looks at her, obviously insecure. "I wanted to write something about the motel and how this is our chance to start over."
"Norman..." He probably didn't forget to tell her but didn't do it out of anger because of her absence and their fight. All of this, however, is forgotten. This is such a sweet idea. Norma embraces her son. "That is so great!"
"Will you help me?" Still restrained but slowly getting excited.
"Of course I will. Get dressed. We'll have breakfast and then we will get started."
He smiles back at her. Then his glance briefly drifts to her cleavage before Norman slightly turns his head so that Norma's lips that were aiming for the corner of his mouth, as always, are pressed against his. She doesn't seem to notice or care.
"Hurry. Get dressed," Norma urges her son on. "It's going to be a beautiful day."
They spend half of the day down at the motel. Norman knows a lot about checking guests in or out as well as about renovation since they did most of it themselves to save money. There is a lot he doesn't know much about though. Room service, accounting, handling complaints. He is at the motel office occasionally, but his mother does most of it. So she tells him and he takes notes, and all of a sudden, it's noon already.
It was fun to show Norman how it all works; she plans to make him motel manager in a couple of months, anyway, but at some point the nausea came back, worse than the day before. It bothers Norma more than she lets on and she is glad when Norman announces that he has gathered enough information and will go to his room to write the essay.
"Yes, of course, honey."
He embraces her and holds her tight for a moment too long. Norma staggers when he lets go.
"Are you not feeling good, mother?"
"Oh, you know, just a little dizzy," she tries to play it down, but he keeps staring at her. Norman has more in common with Alex than he is aware of, especially when it comes to worrying about her and seeing through her fake cheerfulness.
"Geez, Norman, stop looking at me like that."
Only when he tears up and starts to tremble, Norma realizes that this is about more than her dizziness.
"I need to tell you something," Norman whines. "I don't want to, but I don't know what to do and you are feeling sick and maybe you'll have another blackout and..."
"What is it? Norman!" She grabs his upper arms. "What? Tell me!"
He swallows, his Adam's apple bobbing when he presses out the words he doesn't want to say, "The night my father died. It wasn't an accident."
Norma lets go of his arms. "What do you mean?"
"I'm so sorry, mother." Norman is crying now.
"Tell me, Norman," she raises her voice. "What does it mean: not an accident?" It feels as if ice is running through her veins, anxiety making it hard to breathe because deep down Norma knows what her son is going to say, her worst fear coming true.
He averts his eyes from her face, can't look at her. "You were fighting and he was hitting you, holding you down and then you took the iron and..." This is the last thing she remembers before her blackout, that she was ironing. And when she woke up, Norman told her that Sam had died.
Norma shakes her head. No. "It happened in the garage. A heavy shelf fell on him," she whispers, repeating what Norman told her back then.
"I made that up," Norman cries. "You hit him with the iron and he slumped and he… he was dead and I dragged him into the garage to make it look like an accident."
Norman keeps on talking; Norma sees his mouth move. She doesn't hear the words anymore though. You hit him with the iron. It can't be true. But Norman wouldn't lie to her.
"Oh my God!" Norma doesn't realize she is breathing the same words over and over, pressing her hands against her mouth as if she wanted to prevent the truth from coming out, the truth she knows now. She is a murderer.
Norman pulls her in his arms albeit she resists. She doesn't deserve his love. She killed his father. He is not a boy anymore, taller than her, her head safely resting on his chest as she eventually allows herself to break down and cry too.
"That's why I'm so worried about you," Norman murmurs. "And that's why I'm worried you're with the sheriff. He can't know."
Oh God, Alex. It's too much, nausea and dizziness making Norma stagger again. "I have to lie down."
Norman ushers her out of the motel office and up to the house. "Don't worry. I'll take care of you. I will always be there for you."
It's late in the afternoon. Even though Alex talked to Norma this morning, he can't wait to see her again. Maybe they can meet tonight. He consults his watch. Another hour. Then he will call her on his way home and talk her into coming over to his house where they are undisturbed. She still hasn't seen his bedroom.
There is a knock on his door.
"Sheriff?" One of his deputies sticks his head in. "I think you should see this. It could be our breakthrough in the Matt Weary case." He is holding a file in his hand. "I just took the statement of one of Matt Weary's colleagues. He was on vacation and only came back now. He told us that Weary wanted to meet someone the day he died. Do you remember how we always had that theory he might have met someone at the lake? A woman because it was the perfect place for a date? Matt Weary's colleague, um..." The deputy checks the file. "...Mr. Kinney, said that Weary told him he was going to meet Norma Bates. Isn't she the one who killed Keith Summers?"
There is a sound from far away. Some kind of faint ringing that gets louder and louder. Norma groans as she wakes up. She has a bad headache. Why is she in bed when it's only dusk? Norma sits up, a wave of nausea flooding through her. Then she remembers. Why she felt the need to lie down in the middle of the day, what Norman told her.
The sound is her phone on the nightstand that keeps on ringing. It makes her head hurt even more. She reaches out to make it stop.
"Norma?" A voice comes out of the speakers. She must have answered the call accidentally.
"Alex?" Despite her dizziness, she recognizes his voice and notices that it sounds different, distressed. Something is wrong. Well, aside from everything.
"Can you meet me down at the motel? I'm on my way. We need to talk."
"Alex, what's…?"
But he has already hung up.
Alex is already there when Norma comes down to the motel office. She had to take a headache pill first and also tried to compose herself albeit to no avail. She is highly strung, barely able to pull herself together. When he catches sight of her, Alex walks into the back room. An invitation to follow him so that they have more privacy. He is tense, clenching and unclenching his fingers, looking at her as if she was a stranger. It eerily reminds her of her encounter with Norman. Please no. Not two bad messages on one day. She won't be able to handle it.
"Alex..." Norma approaches him to kiss him. He lets her, however it's only a little peck, not the kiss she was hoping for, and when he grabs her upper arms, it's not to pull her even closer but to push her away. Gently but still.
Her first thought is that he found out about Sam. Only when she notices he is keeping a wary eye on her as if he expects her to say something, Norma realizes that Alex asked her a question.
"Sorry, I'm not feeling well. What did you say?"
It is confirmation that something is, indeed, terribly wrong when Alex ignores her comment that she doesn't feel well and simply repeats his question, "Did you meet up with Matt Weary on the day he died?"
It takes Norma a moment to remember. The guy from the book store that died on the same day she had a blackout, that died at the lake where it's muddy and she found her muddy dress in the laundry that she didn't remember wearing. The world starts to spin. Her mouth is dry. None of this can be real.
"I had a blackout on that day." She told him about her blackouts but not about that chronological coincidence.
Alex clenches his teeth. "Your son said that you were at the motel with him the whole time that day," he reminds her of Norman's statement back then when Norman intervened while he was questioning Norma about Weary's death. "Is that true? Because we have a witness who claims that Weary told him he was going to meet up with you right before he died."
He shouldn't tell her this. Never give a suspect the information you have. Let him come up with his version of the truth to contradict himself. Or herself. Let alone that he shouldn't be here at all, questioning a suspect he is involved with. That is cause for a mistrial if it will ever get to that point. Will it? And is this one of the reasons why he is here? To make sure Norma won't ever be convicted? If only because he screwed up during the investigation? Alex doesn't know what to believe anymore. He was convinced Norma had nothing to do with Weary's death, but he knows the guy who made the statement. Kinney is one of the most upright citizens White Pine Bay has and there are certainly not many.
"How am I supposed to know that when I had a blackout?" Norma tackles him, offense is the best defense and all that, her words bringing him back to the here and now.
Her outburst of rage is gone as fast as it surfaced. Norma puts a hand on her chest. She can feel it closing in, whatever it is that is waiting for her on the other side of the happiness she experienced with Alex. Something that good has never happened to her before. Of course it couldn't last. There have always been secrets in my life and I don't want that anymore. I want this to be a new start. It's not going to be a new start. How could it be given the circumstances? But she is tired of hiding from the truth, tired of running away from the mess her life is. Norman is almost of age and Dylan lives with them. He can take care of his brother if she will be sentenced. Norma holds Alex's gaze.
"I killed my husband," she says.
"What?"
This is how life-changing events take place more often than not. There is no bang. The world doesn't end. It just tilts a little, causing things to shift so that nothing is the same anymore and then everything starts to fall apart slowly but surely. Alex made sure that Norma was cleared of suspicion when the Arizona PD was about to inquire into Sam Bates' demise. And now she confirmed that she is responsible for his death.
"I had a blackout. I didn't remember until now," Norma lies, not wanting to bring Norman into play.
"So you had a blackout the day your husband died and the day Matt Weary was killed," Alex recounts, mainly talking to himself.
It's a blood trail. Her husband. Matt Weary. The woman he loves is a murderer. Alex loves Norma; he realized that when he called her in the morning, something that feels like a happy memory from another world. It was so natural when she called him hon. He heard the happiness in her voice and let himself imagine for a moment that she loved him too. Save that now he should rather wonder whether he will be her next victim.
"What happened to Keith Summers. Was that really self-defense?" Alex's thoughts are all over the place. He should call Arizona PD, tell them to re-open the investigation about Sam Bates' death. He should read Norma her rights, take her to the police station for an official interrogation. But all he wants is to clutch at straws and find proof that she is innocent, that at least one thing he believed about her is true.
Norma flinches as if he hit her. "He raped me!"
"But you don't remember that because you had another blackout."
"HE RAPED ME AND I DEFENDED MYSELF," Norma yells. Yes, she doesn't remember the rape, but she remembers the pain afterwards, the ache between her legs that lasted for days, the feeling of humiliation whenever she looked at her skinned wrist where Summers had chained her to the table.
"Norma...," Alex has a hard time keeping his voice down. "Don't you see the pattern? Whenever you have a blackout, someone is dead afterwards. A man you were involved with." He doesn't want her to be guilty, but the acceptance that she might be has begun to sink in.
"Involved?" Memories of her ex-husband flash in Norma's mind's eye. Keith Summers wasn't the first man who raped her. She has a history of abuse, and even if Alex doesn't know that, it still hurts how willingly he seems to insinuate that at least part of what happened could have been her fault. He is no different than any other man.
"Norma, no, I didn't mean that," Alex apologizes. Or maybe he is different, despite everything.
"I wasn't involved with…," she is barely able to say his name, "...Keith Summers. And I had more blackouts where nothing happened."
Alex stares at her. "You can't know that." His voice is low. "Maybe we just haven't found the bodies yet."
She can see the agony in his eyes. Alex Romero is a good man, and yet, he suspects her. Rightfully so. It's surreal, the contrast between what they could have been and what they are now unbearable.
"Are you going to arrest me?" Norma whispers.
It takes him a while to answer. When he does, his voice is firm, "No."
"Then what are you…?"
"I DON'T KNOW, NORMA," Alex yells, his blowup surprising both of them. "Destroy Kinney's statement, threaten him so that he takes it back." He pauses. "Get rid of him." Alex holds Norma's gaze for a moment before he starts to pace across the room. "Run away with you. Do nothing and see what happens." He runs his fingers through his hair. "I don't know. I just don't know." Then he walks out without looking at her again.
"Alex..." Norma reaches out to him, tries to hold him back, but he ignores her although she feels the twitch of his muscles as if he has to hold himself back forcibly when her fingers brush his arm.
She waits for the sound of his car, speeding off but hears angry chopping instead. Obviously Alex found the ax Dylan had used earlier that day to cut some branches up and had forgotten to put away afterwards. Alex is hitting the shed behind the motel again and again, wood splintering due to the crude violence of his strokes. After a while, he stops abruptly, panting hard as he puts the ax down. Only now he notices that she is standing there, watching him.
Please don't leave. It's the only thought in Norma's head. She can't get through this without him even though they are on different sides of the law. Sheriff and suspect. He walks up to her so resolutely that her heart skips a beat because she hopes he will take her in his arms. It's all gonna be good. For a split second she allows herself to believe it, the relief making her unsteady on her feet. Alex stops right in front of her, Norma's body being drawn to his, her natural reaction whenever he is close to her. Then he grasps her neck, his thumb caressing the side of her face, brushing the corner of her mouth while his eyes are searching for something in hers before he lets go and turns around.
The taillights of Alex's squad car disappear in the darkness. Norma doesn't feel anything, a familiar numbness setting in. She knows how to protect herself against the intricacies of life. They are all doomed in the end. It has always been just a matter of time.
To be continued
We're heading towards some hard times for Norma and I fear I've set myself up with it. This will be so difficult to write. I almost cried writing the last scene already. God, what am I doing? However, always keep in mind that I love our favorite pairing to pieces. So… just be patient and remember: It's all gonna be good. xoxo