It was unusually warm for it being a winter morning, and that was no incentive for me to want to get up. I groaned in protest and huddled backwards, pressing further into the inviting comfort. The blankets that swathed around me shifted and a quiet chuckle rumbled behind me, sending a startled shudder down my back. I started to turn over, but the twinging in my back made me think better of that stupid choice, and instead I slowly pulled myself into a sitting position. My flesh felt sore and raw, stinging like I'd suffered a burn, but it was not the raging inferno it had been yesterday. If anything, that comforted me with the knowledge that I was healing, and that it wouldn't be too long before it was nothing but a memory. A traumatizing one, perhaps, but left in the dust all the same.
Tentative fingers touched my shoulder, as if they were afraid the lightest touch might make me crumble. "It's fine," I said automatically, filling in an answer for the question Sasuke hadn't yet voiced. I glanced over my shoulder at him to offer a wan smile, but the shaky reassurance never quite made it to my lips. Through the fog of sleep, I'd only begun to register that the warmth I'd been struggling to burrow closer to had been Sasuke. We'd never shared the bed before last night, and waking up to see his disheveled, still drowsy appearance made my heartbeat stutter. I couldn't recall ever seeing him sleep. The thought that he'd stayed beside me the whole night was (though it should be far from) comforting, and I felt some of the weight of my distress seeping out of my muscles. Nothing could befall me if Sasuke was at my side, I'd come to trust that.
"Come on, we need to get more medicine on and change the bandage," Sasuke's raspy, half-awake voice reminded me of early morning, distant thunder. Getting up and gritting my teeth through all that didn't sound appealing, but the promise of soothing numbness did, and that was what drew my reluctant body out of the bed. I hissed as I stood, the skin on my back prickling with pain as I moved and stretched. Sasuke was beside me in moments, holding out his arm. I accepted the help to steady myself, but despite my gratefulness, I was clenching my teeth too hard to voice it. I could only follow him to the bathroom where I slipped the shirt off, leaned my hands against the counter, and held on with all my strength. I wasn't sure how prepared I could be, but there wasn't anything I could do about it.
To Sasuke's credit, he was as careful as I think anyone could manage while peeling away the bloodied bandages. I sucked in a sharp breath through my grit teeth as the bandage pulled away from my torn flesh, unraveling from around my torso and reminding me of rather macabre streamers. I couldn't bring myself to feel uncomfortable in my nudity like I thought I would, my head was buzzing with too many other worries to cope with. Sasuke hadn't commented, so I felt no need for distress. This was clinical, necessary, and there was no room to find shame in that.
The medicine burned something fierce the moment it touched the ugly crevasses of my flesh, but within seconds the wonderful numbing had dulled my senses into something just short of useless. I groaned low in my throat, a rumble between distress and relief as the medicine worked its way into my skin. Sasuke was silent in his diligence, until the fresh coating of the gel and new bandages were applied and I was once again feeling like a half-mummified wreck. Drying his hands off on a towel, Sasuke looked at me through the mirror, as I'd yet to brave standing straight again. "We need to get you new clothes today," he told me warily, like he was delivering bad news. I wasn't too keen on the idea of any sort of traveling while like this, but I was even less enthralled at the idea of living without proper clothes. The prospect of finally owning things of my own that weren't rags or sizes above or below my own was too tempting to put up an argument.
Besides, Sasuke couldn't stay inside the bedroom forever, and I didn't want to be left alone in it. Not for a while.
"I'm not trying to disagree, but I'll at least need something to go to the shops in," I pointed out. Sasuke snorted at my dry logic, but I should've known better than to think he didn't have a plan. Of course, when he tossed a pair of his jeans and a belt at me, I wasn't sure I'd consider it a "good" plan so much as "well, I tried my best" in a sense. They were awkward to step into and attempt to cinch up around my waist. Again, as I've stated, I'm not a small girl by any means, but Sasuke was taller and that didn't make wearing the damn pants easy. I changed while Sasuke had his back turned to me, though it was a little challenging (and honestly, pointless) to rush. I put on the same shirt I'd slept in, unable to find it in me to care. I already looked like a wayward orphan, why not fulfill my part wholly?
"We're going to be lucky if we make it through the day without any public indecency charges," I grumbled, awkwardly shuffling down the stairs in my effort not to trip.
"What cop is stupid enough to weasel into my business?" Sasuke drawled from behind me. Fine, he had me there. Maybe we'd still meet some greenie who was trying to be brave.
The endeavor downstairs ended without any "toppling headfirst" incidents, luckily. Itachi and Mikoto both were in the living area, discussing in hushed voices that ceased the moment Sasuke and I stepped foot into the room. The pair of piteous, guarded eyes that settled onto me felt as heavy and sticky as pools of tar. I regretted being ambitious today, I should've locked myself away in the bathroom again.
"How are your wounds?" Itachi was the one who broke the silence, and I didn't appear to be the only one taken aback by it.
Stammering, my own voice tried to choke me when I answered. "They're healing, at least they're better than yesterday," I said, reaching back with absent fingers. "I've never seen such powerful remedies at work, I can't express how grateful I am to you," I lowered my head in a small bow towards Mikoto, for without her I was sure I'd be in much worse shape. The memory of last night was fuzzy, and would always remain that way. I didn't want it any other way, but I knew how much they all had helped to save my life. I no longer had it in me to find those vestiges of suspicion or lingering hatred, not after seeing how far Sasuke was willing to go for someone like me. Someone who was only a promise of trouble.
Mikoto smiled warmly, if sadly. "Our family has strong ties with the best medicinal care the country can provide," she explained. "I can't promise you won't scar, but the wounds should close soon, and it will at least soothe the pain until then. I heard you three are going out for a little while today?" Mikoto asked, aiming a pointed look at Sasuke that didn't look like it was entirely curiosity.
Sasuke crossed his arms as he nodded his affirmation, and Mikoto's smile tightened some with trepidation entering her tired eyes. "Stay safe. Alex and I will have some peace and quiet, then," she said, excusing herself from the room. It was news to be that my brother wouldn't be coming along, and I wasn't sure I was comfortable with leaving Alex without Itachi, but I soon realized that thought was a little insulting to Mikoto. I wasn't doubtful that she would keep Alex safe, I was only doubtful of Fugaku.
"It's best to leave early, while the medicine is still fresh." Itachi's voice startled me out of my trench of paranoia, and I realized he'd already stood and was gathering a jingling set of keys. "Besides, I'm sure you both want to get it out of the way."
I grumbled in assent as Itachi stepped past me on his way out of the living room. Sasuke rested a hand on my shoulder, the touch was so soft I almost hadn't noticed it at all. "Are you sure you can handle going out right now?" he asked, and I teetered between gratitude for his concern and annoyance that he found me that fragile.
"It's better than hiding away forever. I'm not going to give anyone that satisfaction," I said, perhaps snapping a bit more than I meant to. Sasuke didn't deserve my misgivings, but he was the only person I knew wouldn't crumble under them.
He gave my shoulder a careful squeeze. "I think you've done a good job of taking that away from him. He doesn't like it when they don't break." I could hear the smirk in Sasuke's voice, mirroring the one that curved my own lips. I don't break, I crack, and it only made me stronger.
I'd started to take my leave, but while rounding the corner towards the front door, I came face to face with someone else and almost ran into them. A gasp leapt into my throat at the unexpected appearance, and I whipped my head back to look up at the imposing man before me. His eyes narrowed into a scowl. For a moment, the lighting in the hallway glinting off the pendant around his neck made me mistake it for a knife. "Watch where you're going," the man snapped, his voice harsh like he was admonishing a beast.
I didn't take kindly to such brazen commands from a complete stranger. My hair bristled in anticipation, but as much as I wanted to, I never got the chance to say anything back. Sasuke, with a hand on the back of my neck, cut in on my behalf. "Hidan, leave her be. You have business elsewhere, I suggest you tend to it." The cryptic words were spoken so calmly, even I almost missed the underlying threat in them. The man, Hidan, snorted at the display, his eyes passing between us before he decided it wasn't going to be worth it. Sasuke coaxed me forward, but he didn't remove his hand. I wasn't sure I found it as uncomfortable as I should have, but I was starting to feel that way about too many things to track it anymore. "Don't try to start anything with him, that's not a fight you're going to win."
That sounded like a challenge...to someone who wasn't looking like a shredded ribbon. "Sure. I'd hate for him to beat me with that pendant," I grumbled. As petulant and odd as it sounded, some part of me itched for instigation. I was sick of being the weakest link, of having the disadvantages. I wanted to not feel vulnerable for a while, but the only thing around here I seemed capable of intimidating was a rock.
"Far be it for him to try, yeah," an unfamiliar voice chimed in. Startled by the newcomer, I froze mid-step towards the door, where Itachi was standing with a younger blond man. He looked closer to my age, though he managed to make me feel like I was standing under the scrutiny of someone much younger. "This is the girl? Shit, you've already almost killed her—"
Itachi drove his elbow into his friend's side, effectively cutting off his sentence. "Forgive Deidara, he doesn't have much of a filter," Itachi sighed, reaching to take his coat off the rack. Sasuke stood to the side, his arms folded as he scowled at the blond man.
"Why's he going?" Sasuke asked, his distasteful expression darkening when Deidara smirked at him. The growing tension was putting me off, but Itachi hardly seemed to notice it as he slipped out the door to pull the car around.
He did call his answer over his shoulder. "Because neither of us is familiar with shopping for women, if Amaya wants to stand a chance she'll need someone with her."
I don't remember agreeing to getting handed off to a stranger, even if Itachi appeared to trust him. Deidara cocked his head at Sasuke and his hair shifted to the side, revealing a patch covering one of his eyes. I swallowed my surprise out of fear that bringing it up would result in annoying—or worse, offending—the young man.
"You aren't exactly known for your fashion tastes, un," Deidara shook his head with mock sorrow. "Besides, it was my turn to meet her. I had a bet on how long it'd be before you killed her, but it looks like everyone lost on that one, yeah." Deidara cut his eyes towards me again, but unlike the fleeting glances I'd grown so used to, his was deliberate. I felt a lot like a butterfly pinned to the wall when he straightened up and began to approach me, his hand extended and reached for my hair. He picked up a lock of my hair and let it slip through his fingers. "You have some red hair," he mused, his fingers gliding up to brush against my ears, where they twitched under the careful skimming of his fingertips.
"Thanks, I grew it myself," I mumbled, weary from all the excitement and new faces.
Deidara dropped his hand away from me and turned towards Sasuke with an air of exasperation. "Are they both nothing but sarcastic little brats?"
"You started it," Sasuke shrugged. Deducing that Deidara must be familiar with Alex, I felt a sisterly pride welling inside me. If we shared anything, it was our crass love of sarcasm. If you couldn't wield a weapon, wield your words, right?
When the three of us headed out to clamber into Itachi's car, the first thing I noticed everyone did was reach for the safety handles above the doors. Stricken with a sudden sense of paranoia, I shot Sasuke a look of utter confusion when he wrapped his hand around my wrist, holding it tightly as Itachi backed out of the yard. The second he put his foot on the accelerator, I understood why everyone had braced themselves.
Had Sasuke not been holding onto me, I'd have cracked my head against the window.
A few hours and a couple of shopping bags later, I was still pretty sure my legs were shaking from the speed-devil way Itachi drove. The worst part was no one would ever believe it, had they not ridden with him. He was too calm to be someone who didn't fear the gods or death when behind the wheel. Behind me, Sasuke was dragging his feet, even less enthused with Itachi's driving than I was.
"I can't believe you bought the entire store for less than two hundred dollars," Sasuke said dryly, eying the bags.
Beside me, Deidara shrugged. "You think my only talent is arson, yeah? I'm wounded. At least you won't have to worry about shopping for the next two years."
I was glad for that, but also somewhat intimidated by the way the older man had marched me around the store like a militarized mission was at stake. He'd banished the two brothers off on their own during the trip. There were also a couple of things Deidara had persuaded me into agreeing to get that I wasn't quite keen on. It only meant I stuffed the bags in the trunk before Sasuke got the chance to check what was in them.
Fortunately for my life span, Deidara was quick to stop Itachi from climbing into the driver's seat as we were all getting into the car. "No, you're done. I'm driving home," the blond snapped, brooking no argument. Itachi sat, sullen, a reluctant passenger as Deidara backed out of our parking space. He drove with a much greater sense of mortality, though I had to admit, it wasn't quite as much fun.
"It's my car," Itachi pointed out in a weak argument, and I found myself covering my hand to smother a laugh. Sasuke didn't quite manage to hide a smirk of his own, but Itachi was too busy giving his friend the side-eye to look back at us.
"Itachi," Deidara calmly responded, "there are children here who deserve to live a few more years before they die in a blaze of glory, yeah. I can take care of that when the time comes."
Sasuke rolled his eyes at what sounded vaguely like a threat to me, leaving me torn on whether I should feel horrified or not. Aside from the stewing tension in the front seat, the ride home was peaceful. My back had begun to sting with pain when I moved too much, and leaning against the seat was uncomfortable. I shifted some in hopes to alleviate some of it, but there was little hope. A cool palm rested over my thigh at the precise moment I felt panic bubbling in my chest, frightened at the oncoming pain and the memories it brought of the initial whipping.
I took a deep breath, Sasuke's hand served as an anchor to keep me from floating too far into the roiling tides of terror. It was such a subtle motion, he wasn't even looking at me, it was as if he'd sensed my approaching panic attack and put an end to it before it could grip me. He'd offered comfort, and I'd allowed myself to accept it. I was no longer sure if we were even the same people who'd met all those weeks ago. Suddenly, I wasn't even sure of how much time had passed, after all. It wasn't any different from the way I'd learned to lived; take each day at a time.
Sasuke never took his hand off my leg, and I never wished for him to. I was even regretful when we got back home, but that might've been due to my hesitance for all the movement.
"All right, kids. Time to get out, we've got some business to take care of, un." Deidara glanced in the rearview mirror and gave a two-fingered salute.
On my way inside, I could've sworn I heard Itachi mutter an indignant "You're only nineteen!" at Deidara.
Sasuke was mumbling a few impolite things about the blond that I pretended not to listen to as we headed back to the bedroom. It was only around midday, and I was ready to collapse again. Instead, I had to pretend like I was holding it together, even if "it" was only there by a thread.
"Go ahead and get your stuff out, we can get the clothes washed." Sasuke was already reaching for one of the bags to dump the contents out, and me, being the absolute oblivious wretch I was, thought nothing of it until I heard a snort from behind me. I glanced over my shoulder from my task of tearing open some plastic packing. In his hands, Sasuke held one of those things I'd earlier been so reluctant to buy.
It was a pack of too lacey, too revealing, far too fancy underwear. I hadn't grasped the concept of fancy underclothes, because I'd always thought they were private and no one else was going to be standing around to judge them. Apparently, my views were rather...incorrect. "He sneaked that past me after I told him no!" I exclaimed, cerise coloring my face.
"He's good for something, at least," Sasuke smirked, his head cocking to the side. Abashed and irritated, I snatched the pack from his grasp to bury it beneath another pile of clothes.
"We're going to pretend those don't exist, got it?" I warned Sasuke as I snapped the drawer shut, hoping my flushed face didn't negate my command.
"Watch your mouth," Sasuke retaliated, though I was sure it was more for habit's sake as his voice lacked any serious threat. The warmth of his body behind mine welcomed me to I lean back against the inviting comfort. My concept of boundaries had thinned, but for the time being, I was content to chalk it up to the vulnerability that last night had left me with. I needed Sasuke's steadfast, unwavering strength. He grounded me and kept me from sinking or floating out of reach. In return, I think I was noticing changes in him, too. The way he smiled and laughed freely, and the tentative sharing of parts of himself. He revealed pieces of a genuine young man hidden behind a shell of armor that he'd all but been born into. If Sasuke was my gravity, perhaps I was his wings.
Sasuke lowered his mouth towards my throat, the feather-light touch of his lips against my pulse drawing out a hunger of my own. It wasn't quite primal, it was equally a hunger for the comfort, the intimacy that I knew his closeness could bring. "Your heart is racing," Sasuke murmured. I groaned in response, a pleasant tingling thrumming across my neck. I leaned to the side, tilting my head over my shoulder. There was a moment of hesitance when neither of us moved, and I realized we both were still afraid of what we'd ventured into. No sooner had I recognized the pause, Sasuke's lips were grazing against mine, pressing a kiss against my mouth. His hand landed on my hip, and I allowed myself the pleasure of enjoying the touch and the way it soothed away my worries.
All the same, it fueled many more.
A commotion downstairs was the only reason Sasuke and I broke apart from each other. If not for that, I'm not sure anything short of oxygen starvation would have. I was still craving the release of sleep, if only as an excuse to become oblivious to the returning pain and to the anxiety churning in my chest. I was being as reckless as Alex had been, and I'd dared to chide him for it. I couldn't bring myself to place Sasuke or his status in peril because of my own selfish, wishful wants. I had to put a stop to it, I just wasn't sure how.
Sasuke hadn't moved far even after we'd pulled away from the kiss, his lips hovering over mine as if he wanted to ignore what was happening below us and continue what we'd been doing. I wasn't sure I wanted to, and part of that was, ironically, because of how much I wanted to. I was uncertain about what it would lead to, though, and that was another roadblock I wasn't yet ready to cross.
"It's Naruto," Sasuke sighed, his breath fanning across my trembling mouth. As he straightened, I felt myself leaning with him, only to catch myself before I could chase another kiss. You really have to pull yourself together. "I'm sure he'll want to see you, if only to ensure you're still alive." Sasuke's bitter remark had no business being so petty, given the circumstances, we would have liked very much to rip out each other's throats some weeks ago.
I clung to that thought on my way downstairs, trailing some behind Sasuke. After all, how could I fall for someone I'd once hated? People couldn't change, not that much...I couldn't.
Hardly before Sasuke had taken the last step off the staircase, a loud voice boomed a greeting. "Long time no see!" Naruto beamed. For someone so loud, I was surprised I hadn't noticed him first. "It's good to see you out and about! I guess the old "locking the girl in the tower" tales don't do it for you, eh bastard?"
A rumbling growl, though quiet, made me hesitate behind Sasuke and allow him a few steps ahead of me. Even when the harsh sound wasn't directed towards me, I couldn't help the way my heart skipped a beat, nor the way I suddenly felt the want to run away. Naruto, the person the sound was actually directed at, only smiled at his friend with all the wiliness of a cat. Their relationship was perplexing. Try as I might, I couldn't picture the two meeting and becoming friends, despite the obvious closeness before me. No one who didn't love Sasuke would trust him enough to irritate him that way, I was sure. Sasuke was the type to make sure that those who annoyed him wouldn't repeat the offense, but Naruto got away with it; more than that, it amused him.
In the blond's hand, there was a brown satchel that he held out for Sasuke to take. "Here's the medicines your mother asked for." Naruto rubbed the back of his neck, wariness souring his expression. "Sakura said the ingredients are getting harder to find, most of them grow in forests on the other side of the border. The treaty is still in consideration, but it's looking good for now."
I stood to the side, pondering the past few weeks that, though I wasn't privy to the goings-on, had been full of Sasuke's business with endless papers and hushed conversations. The two cities that shared the border had been rife with tension for longer than I'd been alive, though it'd worsened over the past decade and there had been more fighting over land and resources. This city was known colloquially as "the city of the dark" and our neighbor as "the city of the light" by most citizens. The Uchiha family ran this city, but I couldn't remember who led in the city of light. It had been too long.
"Give them time, Naruto. It isn't a small decision," Sasuke said, his free hand resting on Naruto's shoulder as he accepted the bag. "It isn't her choice alone, she has people whose voices she has to listen to, just as we do. I'll take this to my mother, do me a favor and stay with Amaya until I get back."
Sasuke was gone before either Naruto or I could say anything. Not that I thought Naruto had a problem with it, but how could you not feel guilty when someone was basically told to babysit you?
Naruto glanced at me and nodded his head towards the living room, prompting me to follow his lead, where he plopped down onto the couch. "Things seem better than when I was last here," Naruto offered conversationally. I was more careful as I took my seat, mindful of how slow I needed to move.
I snorted. That was a bit of an understatement. "It feels like too much has changed in way too short a time span," I admitted. "I didn't see myself starting to find Sasuke…tolerable." That was an even bigger understatement, but it wasn't one Naruto had to be in on.
To my surprise, Naruto laughed. "Yeah, he's good at that," the blond grinned. "I've known him almost my whole life, and I still can't believe I'm friends with him, sometimes."
Picturing the two of them as children together was a difficult thought. I could see how two kids could get forced together easier than the idea of them befriending one another on their own terms. "I can't picture Sasuke as a child," I chuckled. "How did you two meet?" My curiosity got the better of me. It was still tedious pulling information out of Sasuke, whereas I knew Naruto was about as open as a book.
"Our mothers were best friends, once. Both my parents passed away not long after I was born, and I ended up sent out here so that I wouldn't get targeted, too." Naruto leaned back in the couch, his arms folding as he recounted the story to me. "I was born in the city 'a light. When I came here, Sasuke's mom helped take care of me alongside a couple of nursemaids. Course, that meant Sasuke and I had to spend a lotta time with each other. Like ya said, it's hard for him not to grow on you," Naruto snickered. I couldn't disagree, though Naruto had worded it more lightly than I would've. "He's not the heartless asshole he'd want most to believe, y'know? A lot of his personality is conditioning."
I shivered at the sobered tone of Naruto's voice, a faint image of Sasuke's father flashing in my mind's eye. It was such a brief, vivid image than when I heard his voice, I thought it was in my head.
"It's been some time since I last saw you, Naruto. It's nice to see you." Fugaku's voice washed over me like a bucket of ice water. I sat stock still, not even my chest moving with breath, while Fugaku entered the room. I could feel his eyes boring into me without needing to turn around. "I recall telling you animals don't belong on the furniture," he stated, the words dripping with poison.
My face burned as I slipped off the couch to kneel on the floor, my voice stuck somewhere in my throat. From the corner of my eye, I saw Naruto shift forward, but I never found out what it was he might've done. A shadow fell over me then, standing between me and Fugaku.
"I warned you once." Sasuke seethed, his voice an enraged hiss. I held my head lowered, but couldn't resist the urge to glance to the side, where Fugaku backed a step away from us. "Get out of my sight, I don't want to see you near her again."
With wide eyes, I held my breath while Fugaku paused for a moment. He spared me a look that left my stomach churning even after he'd left. The shock from seeing him combined with that of seeing him obey Sasuke's command, his own son. Sasuke reached down and took my wrist, more lifting me than helping me up.
"There's a special place in hell for him," Naruto groused, his own voice coming out as a bit of a hiss. I hadn't noticed that both men's fangs had elongated, a defensive reflex for most vampires, especially for younger ones. When extended, a vampire's fangs made their voices sound hissy and they had to speak carefully to avoid cutting their own tongue or lips. "Why does he have it out for her?"
Sasuke's eyes glinted when they shot towards me, and I realized with jarring understanding that Sasuke didn't understand why, either. "It's in his blood, he's treated everyone below him this way." Sasuke pulled me away from the couch and nudged me towards the stairs. "He isn't going to get away with it anymore, not as long as Itachi and I are around. I appreciate you delivering the medicines, but I'm taking her upstairs, it's been a long day."
"Don't worry about it. Just remember the deal we had as kids, eh? You need someone to hide a body, I gotcha covered." Naruto winked at Sasuke, who smiled eerily in turn at the inside joke. I tried to imagine that same smile on a small Sasuke, but still the image of the vampire as a child eluded me.
Halfway up the stairs, I exhaled a slow sigh. "I'm sorry," I murmured, quietly enough that I thought Sasuke might not have heard. I wanted him to, but that hope that he hadn't still bloomed until Sasuke glanced at me.
"What do you have to apologize for?" he asked. It jarred me. There'd been a time that Sasuke had once commanded apologies from me.
Stepping back into the bedroom had been what I'd wanted all day, but it lacked the comfort I thought it'd bring. "Everything." Nothing. "I've been nothing but trouble since I got here. I don't want to place tension between you and your family, Sasuke…what we've been doing isn't something that should go on." It hurt more than I could've anticipated, saying those words. I had wanted Sasuke to be the one to put an end to the meek version of a dalliance we'd been tiptoeing around.
Sasuke's sharp intake of air made me turn around, unable to keep my back to him. I'd been afraid looking at him would break my resolve. I'd been right to fear that.
Sasuke's eyes were red, pinning me to the wall with a gaze so heavy it all but suffocated me. "Do you think I care what they think?" Sasuke shook his head. "What he thinks? It isn't anyone's choice or business but ours. I thought you were braver than that."
Affronted, I narrowed my eyes and gestured towards him. "I'm not afraid of what happens to me, I'm afraid of what happens to you!" Sasuke's eyes widened, and he made to interrupt, but I never gave him the chance. I stormed forward, pointing a finger into Sasuke's chest. This all felt rather familiar. "I won't forgive myself if you ever got hurt, if you suffered because of one reckless choice. You have a title to live up to, Sasuke, one that doesn't involve a servant from the streets!"
I was too lost in my own head to notice I had begun yelling, my voice rising in octave with each passing second. I'd only stopped to suck in a weak breath when a pair of arms threw around me. Sasuke's arms wrapped around me so tightly, I was afraid he might crush me, like he was afraid to let go. I could feel the anger shaking in his limbs, the uncertainty, and the fear. I wasn't the only one who was afraid.
"This is too much, Sasuke. It's too far out of our control," I whispered against his shoulder, too exhausted to try fighting his embrace. "I don't know what we can do."
"No one else is going to take that power away from me," Sasuke argued, and why would I have expected him to let anyone else have control? Even a shred? "I told you I would keep you safe, that I would stay beside you. I don't intend to let anyone stand in the way of that."
"Including me?" I smiled, be it a weak one, it was still a smile. Sasuke tightened his arms around my waist and I felt a weight atop my head when he lowered his forehead to rest against my hair.
"I try very hard not to need other people." Sasuke's confession was muffled, but still clear enough for me to hear. "I don't know what it is about you, but…I don't know what I'd do if you left, too."
My chest tightened painfully. I was lucky that I didn't choke on a sob right there, so overwhelmed by my own emotions as much as Sasuke's. I had never seen him so vulnerable, and it felt like too fragile a gift. I couldn't fathom the people who had only used Sasuke or saw his status instead of a person; his own father had raised a weapon, a pawn instead of a son. I couldn't be one of those people, I couldn't be someone who abandoned him.
I wrapped my arms around him in a tight hug, burying my fingers in his dark hair as I held him. I was going to break the very promise I'd made to myself, and it was by making another one. "Whatever happens, we're in this together," I swore, shifting so that my face was buried against Sasuke's neck. I pressed a kiss against the smooth expanse of skin, hoping that if my words wouldn't soothe him, perhaps action would.
Sasuke shuddered, his hands sliding lower to my hips. A growl rumbled between us, it took me a second to realize it had come from me, this time. Sasuke's fingers dug into my skin in response, struggling to pull me impossibly closer. I pulled back only to surge forward and press our lips together, claiming his mouth in a kiss. Sasuke's teeth nipped at my lips a bit, but when I let my own part, he pulled away. I groaned in frustration, but Sasuke quieted me by cupping my face, coaxing me to focus.
"I don't want to force you into anything, if you feel—"
I tightened my fingers in his hair, earning a low moan that cut off his voice. It was a surprisingly beautiful sound, one that I would do anything to hear again. "I'm the one who started it," I reminded him. "If we're going to break the rules, I want to do it right." I wanted to give and I wanted to take. Sasuke's eyes darkened, losing their hesitance as something more primal filled that reluctance. "I want you to belong to me. I want to belong to you, Sasuke."
It was a brazen wish, I realized, as Sasuke lowered his mouth to the mark on my throat. It throbbed, but it was far from a painful feeling. Warmth spread from my neck, trickling through my veins until I felt nothing but fire inside. With his teeth grazing against my neck, Sasuke smirked.
"You already do."
I got flashbacks of my own best friend when Itachi reminded Deidara he was only nineteen years old. My friend is a few months younger than me, but he'll never miss a chance to refer to me as "kid" and treat me like I need his supervision. Like, I do, but he doesn't have to act like it.
I didn't rewrite the sexual content in this story because I've found I don't really enjoy writing it anymore. It used to be nearly all of what I wrote, now I try to avoid it unless it's really necessary. I'm sorry! Maybe someday I'll come back and write a sex scene. Until then, though, it just feels like the story doesn't need it. I mean...we all know it happened.