Team SaBRE

Ever wanted something for so long? Ever been hoping against hope, looking for a miracle? Have you ever gotten what you thought you've always wanted? But it didn't meet your expectations?

But was, in fact, way, way, way, better.

That was how Sarah felt about being human again. She didn't miss the flying nor the super-speed. She was almost relieved to have lost her super-strength. As for losing the fangs and the need to drink blood? No regrets; in fact, that was the best part of it all.

Looking in the mirror, having her picture taken. Over and over again, so much so that Sarah worried she was becoming incredibly vain. Pizza and not having to wait for a formal invitation to enter a house? Just icing on the cake.

On reflection there was one good thing that came out of the whole vampire experience. Two years ago, Sarah would have never thought she could fall in love with a guy like Ethan. But it was a friendship and now a romance forged in fire. Shy, geeky, thoroughly decent Ethan. The video games? The mint condition toy robots? The collection of US state and Canadian provincial license plates? Ethan's Battlestar Galactica DVDs? She loved all of it about him.

Sarah loved it so much she could picture herself with Ethan, watching Star Wars in a quiet split-level home behind a newly painted white-picket fence.

They were in a booth in the Whitechapel Road Ice Cream Parlour, not on a date but waiting for something to come along about a half hour from now. Ethan's "newly expanded" seer powers not only meant that he could "go into people's minds" (Sarah told Ethan she'd punch his nose in if he'd ever deliberately tried to do that to her!), but Ethan could punctually predict the next monster sighting. Ethan had hoped that normalcy would reign supreme, even in Whitechapel, but as Benny's grandmother had said the gang would have to deal with monster's showing up from time to time.

"Team FM? Team Former Monsters! That's what Rory wants to call us?" Sarah asked Ethan. "I'm happy Rory's come to his senses. But Team Former Monsters? I hope you didn't agree to that?"

"Are you kidding?" asked Ethan. "Benny and I vetoed it right away. We don't want to be known as the team ex-werewolf, zombie and vampire . . . s. But don't worry. I actually came up with a better acronym."

"Why do we need an acronym for our monster fighting team, anyway" asked Sarah, as she finished her butterscotch sundae.

Throughout Sarah's life, she had preferred strawberry. But, for the time being, she was avoiding any food or drink that so much as resembled blood.

"All the best teams have names" explained Ethan, excitedly. "All the best names are acronyms. So we're Team Sabre. Sarah . . . that's the S and A . . . then Benny, Rory and me. Sabre. Like the Jedi light sabres . . . in Star Wars.

"Glad to be first" Sarah observed, "But why are you last?"

"Well, we eventually decided to go with your name first" Ethan continued, eagerly. "As for me last? Sabre was just the best name. And Rory, Benny and me had a real fight over the right spelling of sabre! For plain, ordinary sabre . . . as in sword . . . the Canadian spelling is S-A-B-R-E. But if you look online, light-sabres . . . as in Star Wars . . . most sources say the American way spelling is the right way. S-A-B-E-R. But there are a few that suggest in Canada and Britain you can use S-A-B-R-E. We couldn't figure out what to do! But then Benny pointed out that they don't even speak English in the Galactic Republic. They speak Galactic Basic and use the Aurebesh alphabet! So, really, light S-A-B-E-R is itself actually a translation! So there's no real reason to go with the American spelling. Since we're Canadians, the best thing to do is to go with S-A-B-R-E.

"You're right, Ethan" Sarah conceded simply. "Team Sabre's a good name. And we ought to go to with the Canadian spelling."

Funny, how love changed people. Sarah didn't find the words "You're right, Ethan" to be at all forced. Nor did Sarah even mind listening to Ethan's happy exposition on what she considered pretty silly Star Wars trivia. Sarah enjoyed hearing Ethan talk about a topic she knew he loved.

"Benny originally wanted us to go with Team BEERS" Ethan added casually. "Benny, Erica, Ethan, Rory and Sarah. But we'd need Erica along to make it work. Any luck with her?"

Ethan knew the answer.

"No" said Sarah. "Erica's still remorseful over no longer being an "immortal vampire, hot forever, just like Dusk, living on a higher plane of being." Sarah quoted Erica with deadly sarcasm. "Give her some time."

Ethan shrugged. He hoped Sarah would talk sense into Erica. If Ethan had to facilitate Erica becoming a bloodsucker again, it would easily be the worst thing he'd ever do.

Just then Benny and Rory showed up, with only minutes to spare before the monster attack. Benny was carrying the aged brown magic book his grandmother gave him. Rory was wearing an oversized belt with his ultraviolet light sabre neatly carried in a scabbard on the side.

"Team Sabre has arrived" said Rory, as he got to the booth. "Two ex-vampires, an ex-werewolf and an ex-zombie, united to protect humanity from the evils of monster-kind."

"Don't advertize the ex-vampire, ex-werewolf, ex-zombie part, Rory" said Sarah sharply."

"Yeah" said Benny. "Let's go with Benny the Awesome Spell-caster and his friends fight evil as Team Sabre."

"No" said Sarah, Ethan and Rory simultaneously.

Benny shrugged.

"Team Sabre fights for humanity" said Ethan, and with a shrug added, "an alliance against any monster that evilly preys on humankind."

One such monster was just coming in. The ice cream parlour's owner, a elderly man, had stepped aside from the counter as a delivery man used a hand-truck to push an enormous crate in through the double front doors. "One crate of Yummy Yak, special delivery."

"Yummy Yak?" said Sarah. "Yak flavoured ice cream?"

"It's not Yak flavoured" said Rory. "It's totally cool."

"Yeah, ice cream is nothing if not cool" said Sarah sarcastically.

"No" said Rory. "I mean it's an awesome idea. It's regular vanilla flavoured ice cream, but it's made from yak's milk. It's shipped straight from Nepal."

"Why would anyone want to drink yak's milk?" asked Ethan.

"My grandma keeps some powdered yak's milk in her special cupboard" observed Benny, looking expectantly at the crate. "I swiped it once when I ran out of cow's milk for my cereal. It's actually pretty good."

"This isn't my shipment of Yummy Yak" the elderly proprietor told the delivery man. "This is a shipment to Professor Adelaide at McMaster University, Department of Crytozoology."

"Na, this is your crate alright" insisted the deliveryman. "We've been following all the special shipping instructions."

"What were those?" asked the proprietor.

"Poke crate with provided darts full of ether every three hours. Shipping company agrees to be held liable for any damages that result from failure to follow these orders."

At that moment, the top of the crate burst open to the power of a huge paw.

The shipment turned out to be more yeti than yak, a pretty angry yeti that took an instant to break out of the crate and push the shipping man and ice cream parlour owner to the ground.

"Abominable Snowman" cried out Ethan, Benny and Rory at once.

The creature was a furred, dirty white creature with bloodshot red eyes. Stretched out, it was as high as the ceiling, while it was easily two yards across. The snowman bowled over tables with a wave of its hands.

"This is perfect for my light sabre" said Rory, brandishing it as if he were Luke Skywalker channelling the force.

"Wait, Rory" said Sarah. "You're not a vampire anymore. You need to be careful"

"Human's better than bloodsucker anytime" said Rory, "And a really agile human is best of all."

"That light sabre's not going to do a thing against that yeti" said Benny.

"Are you kidding?" said Rory. "It's a snowman!"

"It's not called an abominable snowman because its made of snow" insisted Ethan.

From under the table, Sarah lifted up a backpack full of the magical gadgets Vice Principal Stern had confiscated through the school year.

But it turned out Sarah didn't need them, at that moment at least. Rory was definitely more agile, at least now that he had his contacts in. What's more, the light sabre did give a very good stab . . . a stab that went right through the monster.

"I don't know if it's made out of snow" said Rory, leaping back before the creatures assault "but it's melting. Wait until the Ror-ster gives it a few more stabs."

The first stab, however, had infuriated the creature. Rory was no longer Luke Skywalker; Rory screamed like a girl and dived behind the store's counter, which the yeti proceeded to slowly smash to smithereens.

"Benny, do your lightning spell!" said Ethan.

Benny did. The heat from the lightning made the creature sweat buckets, and slip in its own meltwater. Another blast of lightning from Benny made the snowman fall into pieces and thaw into a large puddle of dirty water.

"Reminds me of Jesse and Anastasia" said Ethan, his face turning green.

"Yeah, we could have done without more oozing" said Benny.

"That was what it was looked like?" asked Sarah.

"No" said Rory, as he got up from behind the counter. "Way, way more sick and really, really terrifying."

"I'm ruined!" yelled the elderly parlour owner. "Who's going to believe this!"

"Wait!" said Ethan. "Didn't you buy insurance from my dad?"

"Yes" said the ice cream store manager. "But how am I going to explain this?"

"My dad's also an adjuster" said Ethan. "Just make sure to tell him that the shipping company sent you the wrong crate. And the animal that was in it trashed your shop."

"Not to mention giving him the number of that Professor of Cryptozoology" said Benny. "That guy's really going to be angry. He had probably the only Abominable Snowman on this side of the world, and his shipment got lost by mistake. The guy even went to the trouble to pay to have it shipped by refrigerated container!"

"Too bad the professor didn't get his package" Ethan observed. "I was hoping without the dark energy in town we might have more of a break."

"We still might, Ethan" said Sarah, reading the shipping label. "This was shipped out from Nepal over a month ago. It started heading our way long before the lucifractor blew up. Maybe in the future we can go more than a few weeks at a time without another monster to deal with."

"But when the monsters come" said Rory, as he carefully put his light sabre back in his scabbard, "Team Sabre will be waiting for them!"

The four teens joined in a group high-five.

To be concluded.