A/N: It's been amazing reading all your thoughts on the path I've chosen for this story. Please keep them coming! Just a note, I have no plans to include the Anschluss in this story but who knows, I might change my mind. Anyway, enjoy.
Just as the first rays of the morning's sun began to bathe the hotel room in dawn's honeyed glow, Georg made love to her again. She awoke cocooned in his arms, his warm torso spooned against the length of her back, his gentle heartbeat drumming against her skin - and within minutes he was inside her, pressing unhurried kisses to the crook of her neck. In no obvious rush, he brought her to the heights of rapture through languid, lingering nudges that turned her insides to lava, and for a few wonderful moments Maria almost felt protected from the rest of reality.
Afterwards they lay in each other's arms, he stroking his fingers along her jaw, and she nestled into the crook of his shoulder, the atmosphere thick with words left unsaid. As much as she normally greeted each morning with an exuberant zest for life, today Maria rather wished she had the power to force the sun back behind the horizon. For soon enough, their perfect evening would come to an end and they would be forced to face the music.
The magnitude of their elicit liaison had since sunk in, the shock having eased a little throughout the night - and in its place had come a melancholic acceptance, an unspoken understanding that they would soon have to part ways. He had tried again during the night to convince her otherwise, to make her see that they could somehow find a way - but she had silenced him with gentle kisses, wordlessly asking him not to dwell on such things during their last precious hours together.
It had worked, to an extent - but now that morning had come, she could tell by the look in his eyes that he wanted to ask her something, a question he was clearly too afraid to hear the answer to.
"Go ahead," she whispered, tracing the worry lines on his brow with her fingertips, "ask me..."
"Do you regret it?" He winced, capturing her hand with his and pressing a kiss to her palm. The shake of her head was barely perceptible, but it was enough to make his shoulders sag with relief as he let out the breath he'd been holding.
"I know what we've done is wicked-" she began.
"It's not wicked Maria!" He stiffened in frustration, "Not with the way I feel about y-"
"Shhh, Georg!" she soothed, "Just let me finish."
Reluctantly he settled back against the pillows, a slight frown darkening his brow - but he remained silent.
"What we've done is wrong," Maria continued, holding up a hand when he tried to protest further, "but I can't bring myself to regret it. It's the circumstances I regret... the decisions we made..." she trailed off wistfully, before murmuring to herself, "I regret ever leaving in the first place."
"Why did you?" He asked gently, not for the first time, "was it because you were frightened.. of what was happening between us?"
She nodded, "I knew something was happening but I didn't understand it.. not really," she confessed, "It was only when the baroness-"
Suddenly she froze, her cheeks colouring and her gaze shifting away from him in panic. But the damage was already done, for Georg immediately sat bolt upright, his eyes black with an anger she recognised all too well as belonging to her former employer, "Maria... " he pressed, his voice a commanding murmur, "it was only when the baroness what?"
"She was only trying to help.." Maria insisted, but Georg was having none of it.
"Help herself, I would imagine," he snarled bitterly, "Maria, please.. you need to tell me. What did Elsa do?"
Sighing, Maria sat up in bed reluctantly, knowing her captain would be too stubborn to relent and that she would have to offer a full explanation. Taking a deep breath, she fixed her gaze to the duvet covers and began to recall one of the most anguished evenings of her life.
"The night of the party, the baroness offered to help me find something suitable to wear," she began, her voice trembling slightly, "I was still flustered from our dance and... well, she helped me shed light on exactly what it was I was feeling. Worse still, she revealed how obvious I'd been in my affections towards you, obvious to everybody but myself. 'There's nothing more irresistible to a man than a woman who's in love with him'," she quoted sadly, shaking her head as Georg's eyes darkened with silent rage.
"She also said that you believed yourself to be in love with me too, but that you would get over it soon enough. I was mortified that I'd been so transparent with my feelings, and terrified that I was sabotaging your chances for a new family," she took a shuddering breath, twisting her hands vulnerably in her lap, "I was meant to be there on God's errand. I couldn't face you again Georg... and so I fled."
He said nothing for a long time, his face a grave mask as he let her words sink in - and she grew more agitated with every second of silence that passed. Was he angry with her, she wondered. Was he resentful of her spinelessness?
"It was cowardly of me," she whispered with shame, unable to bear his despondence, "forgive me."
"Oh darling, there's nothing to forgive!" he proclaimed, pulling her into his arms and pressing a firm kiss to her forehead, attempting to calm his own flaring rage, "I should've come after you," he growled, "I should've seen through Elsa's petty manipulations, I-"
"She was trying to help me!" Maria implored, "Help us. Everything she said was true."
But Georg was convinced otherwise, "You always see the best in people," he smiled ruefully, cupping her silken cheek, "It might've been true that we were in love Maria but she lied when she convinced you that I would get over it. Her intentions were self-serving - she could see that I was falling in love with you and she wanted you out of the way," he shook his head resentfully, "And to think, I felt guilty for neglecting her," his scoff was bitter, "I convinced myself that you wanted to serve God and that Elsa deserved better from me. My proposal of marriage was based on a lie and I was too stubborn to explore the truth. It should be me asking for forgiveness."
"It seems there are things we both regret.." Maria smiled sadly.
"But not this," he gestured between them, before kissing her in a way that almost made her change her mind, "never this."
Some time later, not long before the rest of the hotel would be waking, they reluctantly slipped from bed, pulling on their clothes in melancholic silence - and Maria felt her heart breaking with every minute that passed. Leaving him once had been hard enough. To do it again - knowing how they felt about one another - would surely be too difficult to contemplate. But her feelings were not the only ones she needed to consider...
"It's not too late you know.. " Georg beseeched, sitting next to her on the edge of the bed and buttoning his shirt with impatient fingers, "my marriage is over whether you leave for England or not. It was over long before you came back into my life."
Taking pity on his buttons as he wrenched them into place, she batted his hands out of the way and resumed the task herself, "Please Georg.. " she whispered, concentrating on his shirt rather than the sadness in his eyes, "don't make this harder than it already is."
"But it doesn't have to be this way," he stilled her hands with his own against his chest and brought her fingers up to his lips, pressing kisses to each of them in turn.
"I already told you," she sighed in frustration, "I have a life back in England. I made a promise to..." she trailed off before mentioning Alfred again, knowing deep down that it was guilt that was driving her decision, "And have you even stopped to consider what the end of your marriage will mean for your reputation? What do you think people will say when they discover you left your wife to pursue a courtship with your former governess?" She shook her head in defeat, "People will talk."
"I don't give a damn about what people think of me!" Georg snarled, his face flashing with anger.
"And what about the children?" Maria retorted, "Do you care about what people think of them? The impact this will have on them? They'll be subjected to people's scorn just as much as you will..."
He said nothing then, though his scowl remained - and she took the opportunity to run her lips over the lines creasing his forehead.
"Please.. " she whispered, "we have precious few minutes left together. I don't want to spend them arguing."
His heart heavy with sadness, Georg could do little else than wrap his arms around her waist, pulling her closer and burying his face in her neck. She held him in her embrace for long minutes, the only sound their whispered professions of love as they cradled one another - until eventually the time came for her to go back to her own room. She attempted unsuccessfully to extricate herself from his arms, tears welling in her eyes when he tried to hold on to her - "Georg.. please," she choked desperately, until eventually he let her go, his face a picture of despair.
"Not one day will go by without me thinking of you..." he told her just as she was leaving, "I'll be waiting.. hoping.. " - and somehow she managed to get a metre or so down the corridor before she let out a broken sob, clutching at her stomach and steadying herself with a palm against the wall. Taking deep, calming breaths she hurried on in her journey for fear that he might follow her - because she knew she wouldn't have the strength to resist him if he did. Breaking into a desperate run, she rounded a corner, only to rush headlong into a solid masculine form.
"Woahh, slow down my dear!"
Much to Maria's horror, she looked up to find Herr Detweiler staring right back at her, appraising her with a look of concern laced with mild amusement, "are you alright? You're shaking like a leaf!"
When she said nothing, staring at him like a deer caught in the headlights, his eyes narrowed further.
"Fraulein?"
"You're.. you're supposed to be at the Bristol," she rasped, stunned and dismayed at having been caught as she tried to gather her composure.
"Don't I know it!" The impresario replied bitterly, "I ought to be tucked up in my plush four poster bed still - but Georg insisted last night that I give him a lift home at the crack of dawn. For some reason he's in rather a hurry to leave," he smirked knowingly, his eyes sparkling.
"I... I need to finish freshening up for breakfast," Maria stammered in an attempt to escape, hurrying past him before he saw the tears that threatened to spill from her eyes.
"Uh.. Fraulein?" Max called after her - and Maria held her breath, her heart in her throat as she turned to face him.
"Last night's dinner dress might be a little too formal for breakfast.." the impresario teased, gesturing to her outfit and watching the colour suddenly flooding into her cheeks.
"I..." she choked, trembling like a gazelle.
"Are you sure you're alright?" Max frowned slightly in concern, taking a step towards her - but before he could offer to walk her back to her room, she muttered something in the affirmative and fled from his sight. It didn't take a genius to guess at what the girl might've been up to - Max had experienced enough of his own hotel rendezvous in the past to recognise the telltale signs of a secret liaison. What left him feeling uneasy however, was the fact that he couldn't quite be sure of which lucky gentleman she had been calling upon.
Surely Georg wouldn't... but then, the longing in his best friend's eyes the previous night had been unmistakeable. It was as if they'd all been transported back in time to the evening that Georg had sung Edelwiess, the lethal attraction between the master of the house and his governess too palpable to ignore. Would Georg have been strong enough to resist if the girl had gone to him last night, Max wondered. Would the girl have dared to go to him in the first place?
Surely not, surely it was the lieutenant she had been bold enough to pay a visit. And yet, Max couldn't shake the uneasy feeling that there was more to his run-in with the Fraulein than first met the eye.
Georg knew nothing of the world for a long time, sitting on the edge of the bed where he'd made love to Maria not too long ago, staring absently at the door through which she'd left. He felt empty, broken, numb. After everything they'd shared in the whirlwind of the last twelve hours, he really thought he'd be able to convince her to stay. To give up her future for an uncertain one with him. But he had expected too much, demanded too much, he realised. Why in God's name would she sacrifice a life with a man her age, a man who treated her the way she deserved, for a life with him - a retired naval captain fifteen years her senior with seven children and a whole lifetime of baggage.
If there was one silver lining to the dark cloud he found himself under though, it was the knowledge that lieutenant Norden would at least treat Maria right. He would be good to her, Georg knew - he would cherish her in a way that would make her feel loved and wanted. Time, and the affections of another, would eventually put an end to Maria's suffering - while Georg's own broken heart would travel with her to England, leaving a shell of a man behind. But he would immerse himself in the love of his children, he decided - he would not fall into despair and lock himself away from them the same way he had done all those years ago. He was better than that now - Maria had made him a better man.
Suddenly, and quite without warning, a light knock at the door pulled him from his miserable reverie - and instantly his heart began to gallop on an off-beat in his chest. Who could possibly be calling for him at this early hour, unless it was Maria coming back to tell him she'd changed her mind? His heart swelling with fresh hope, he launched from the bed and wrenched the door open, ready to take her into his arms when-
"Morning Georg," Max trilled, leaning casually against the door jamb and scrutinising his friend's dishevelled appearance with a raised eyebrow. Immediately Georg's stomach plummeted into his shoes.
"Max... it's you," he muttered in disappointment, battling with his tattered nerves and trying to catch his breath.
"Of course it's me, just who else would you be expecting?" The impresario's eyes narrowed.
"No one.. no one," Georg stammered, running a hand over his tired face, "I er... it's just terribly early, that's all."
"I'm well aware of how terribly early it is Georg, but it was you who insisted - by rather aggressive means, I might add - that I drive you back to the villa at sunrise, remember?" Max retorted sardonically, "and guess what? It's sunrise."
"Alright alright, I'm coming," Georg sighed, gathering his sparse belongings and sending one last wistful glance around the room that would forever hold some of his most cherished memories.
It was a short time later when Maria left her hotel room to go down to breakfast, only to discover that her legs were carrying her in completely the opposite direction. The direction of Georg's bedroom, no less. She had no idea what was possessing her to go back to him - after all, she'd already made her decision, a decision that would break both of their hearts. But she couldn't bear the thought of leaving things the way she had. The despair in his eyes was still burned into her memory and all she wanted was to run back into his arms and tell him that everything would be alright... somehow.
All but an hour ago, her decision to leave for England had made sense in her head - it was the path she'd chosen, the path that led her away from betrayal and sin, the path that spared Alfred's heart, the path that protected Georg's reputation and those of his children. But now, now that she was without him, feeling his absence like a knife to the chest, panic had begun to set in and all her carefully constructed arguments suddenly seemed meaningless. She had no clue what she would say to him - all she knew was that she needed to see him. She would worry about the consequences later.
Turning onto the corridor in which she'd banged into Herr Detweiler, she suddenly broke into a run - driven by a desperate need and a rising anxiety that perhaps she had dreamt the entire thing, that he would be a stranger to her once again. But when she finally reached his door and flung herself through it, it was to discover that the room was bare, and that her captain was nowhere to be seen.
A/N: as always your thoughts are the precious gift in my pocket!