Okay, okay, I know what you guys are thinking. This author is a piece of shit. I keep telling you guys that the party's starting but time and again, it's all fluff, no action. I'm a terrible person, I know /clutches heart. SORRY. AND THERE ARE SO MANY GRAMMAR MISTAKES I CRY. (Cons of a fast typer. I just breeze through like a hurricane lel)

But may I present to you, ladies and gentlemen, THE TRUE BEGINNING. And you guys can throw virtual punches at me for being a dick. BUT NOT THE FAYCE. /covers

Chapter Eleven: A New Team

The exams were today. And they were a piece of cake, nothing to it. Sure, I went to school with a busted leg but I was fine. Everything went smoothly and a lot of people passed. Well, some didn't make it but who am I to judge them?

Iruka-sensei gave me the headband, his smile proud, "Congratulations, Mononoke. You've earned it." I raised an eyebrow at him, grinning, "Even if I missed most of the classes?" "Even if you missed most of the classes. You were always too smart for your own good.", Iruka-sensei replied, his smile growing wider. I was going to miss this guy's lecturing, that's for sure. And I would have been happier but Mizuki-sensei, who was beside him, unnerved me.

I never did liked the man with his shifty eyes. And his scent. It was awful. It's not like he had a bad body odour or anything, he's actually smells clean but he reeks of mental sickness. The sort that gnaws you and fills you with hate and envy. It made me uneasy whenever I got within five feet of him. He smiled at me but I think the smile I returned was more of a turned down sneer. Turning my heel, I made my way out of the building, putting distance between me and the gawd awful smell, to where the graduated students crowded with their proud families.

Watching a few of them, I spotted a dad punched his son on the arm with great vigour and another mother hugging her daughter proudly. What's the deal with all the soap opera anyway? It's just an exam. We have it twice a year. Big deal. I snorted a little at the sight.

"Some view, huh?", I heard a familiar voice said and I nodded at Shikaku-san, annoyance clearly shown on my face, "You'd think they save the world or something." The Nara leader chuckled and rubbed my head, "Well, you'd passed, so you're one of the brave heroes too." I groaned in disgust and folded my arms, "Tch, some hero." I was extremely moody today due to a bad night's sleep. I even kicked Shikamaru out of bed.

Looking around to get my mind off it, I spotted a muted orange in the trees nearby.

Turning to focus on the color, I felt my heart sink a little. Of the few that didn't make it, Naruto was one of them. I heard he was the only one in our class who didn't get to pass. Nudging Shikaku, who was waiting for his son to come out from the building, I spoke softly, "I'll come home later." He raised an eyebrow at me, "We're going to celebrate afterwards."

Damn, food. But I can leave it for later. Naruto needs a little cheering up.

I waved the man off and gave him a smile, "I'll catch up to you later."

I could tell he was watching me walked to Naruto, but when I managed a small glance back, he was smiling approvingly. Feeling bolder, I walked to Naruto. His eyes were so lost, I couldn't help but feel sad for him.

"Hey, sourpuss.", I greeted and sat on the grass beside him. He blinked at me in surprise before rubbing his eyes with an orange sleeve and greeted me with a half smile, his eyes rimmed with red, "Hey, Mononoke." I lifted one side of my mouth upwards, trying to act natural, "It's a darn big crowd this time, huh?"

He nodded, not wanting to talk about it. I noticed his jealous glance on the band around my right am and I sighed, placing a hand on his leg, "Hey, it's okay. You can get it the next time around." Although he was surprised at the voluntary touch, the blonde looked away and made a rude noise. I smirked at him, "What do you say we have some ramen later?" His ears seemed to prick up at the mention of his favourite food and he looked at me happily, cheering up already, "For real?"

I nodded, lifting my shoulders in a carefree way, "Yeah, why not? My treat." He whooped and dropped down from the swing, pulling me into a big hug, "You're the best, Mononoke-chan!"

I laughed at his cheerfulness, much better than all that doom and gloom a few minutes before. I was kind of glad that I managed to get his mind off it, if only for just a while. Grinning at him, I punched him in the arm playfully, "Save your energy later, baka. We're not just going to have ramen. Let's compete who can eat more!" "Bring it on, dattebayo!", Naruto confirmed loudly and we laughed.

Suddenly, an ugly scent wafted in the air and I narrowed my eyes behind Naruto, baring my teeth into a dangerous growl. He blinked in surprise at my sudden change before turning to look behind.

"Hello, you two. I was wondering if you mind while I interrupt the both of you for a moment?", Mizuki said politely and I pulled Naruto's sleeve, bringing him closer to me while I growled a little at him. "No, not one bit." Sarcasm was dripping heavily but of course the Chunin decided to pointedly ignore me and turned to Naruto, smiling, "Good. Mind if we have a little chat, Naruto-kun?"

Naruto, on the other hand, was looking back and forth from me and Mizuki, his face clearly confused.

I sighed a little, before turning to Naruto and gave him a forced grin. Let the boy choose. Naruto smiled a little at me, "Uh, I'll talk to Mizuki-sensei first then. I'll meet you later at Ichiraku's." He's made his choice. Very well.

Even though Mizuki's stench told me he had some immoral intentions, I can't choose for Naruto since Mizuki was asking him after all. I'm not his mother. And if I pull Naruto away, it'll only heighten Mizuki's need for him and it's going to be easier for him to drag Naruto into whatever grim deed he's planning in his pretty head. After all, the more restricted something is, the more curious he'll be. Naruto would be all the more likely to be influenced. All these thoughts began to swirl in my head as I processed the scene unfolding before me.

Dammit Naruto.

It seems all I can do is cross my fingers and hope that the boy has enough common sense to back out of any stupid shit he's going to get mixed up in.

Nodding, I released Naruto and grinned at him, ruffling his hair, "You better be coming or I'll never treat you again, dumbass." The knucklehead just gave me a toothy smile, "I'll be there, dattebayo!" I smiled, sincerely sending some luck to him. He's going to need it.

After Naruto left with the horrible man, I felt a gaze on me and my eyes slide towards the source. Iruka-sensei and Sandaime was watching me. I turned to face them fully, my gaze steady.

If they knew something was up, they better move their asses and get on it.

X

I didn't get to see Naruto after that.

"You think he's coming?", Teuchi, the boss of the ramen shop, asked as he wiped a bowl. I shrugged. I've already eaten two bowls of ramen and the blonde idiot isn't anywhere close. "I doubt it.", I replied with a sigh before looking at him, "Gimme a couple of gyoza, boss." He smiled kindly at me, "You got it, kiddo. This time, it's on the house!"

"Thanks, old man.", I smiled gratefully as he got to work. Before he could speak, Ayame appeared from the back with a huff, "Naruto still isn't here yet? He really shouldn't let a lady wait." I shook my head and laughed, "I'm no lady, Ayame-chan. And it's nothing. I guess he's busy." She snorted in disbelief, "Too busy for ramen? You might as well tell me that pigs fly." I pondered for a moment before I waved my chopsticks at her, "You know, pigs could fly." She gave me a dirty look as she handed me a plate of six gyoza and I shrugged, "If you throw them off a cliff."

"Thought I might find you here.", Kakashi said as he took a seat beside me. I grinned at the sight of my favourite person and showed him my bare right arm, the ninja band tied in between my elbow and shoulder, the untarnished metal gleaming under the light, "Look! Pretty cool, huh?"

"Mhmm. I knew you could do it.", Kakashi said, amusing me as I burst with enthusiasm. "So you know, we'll be having an orientation day tomorrow, and I was wondering.."

As I was bubbling to Kakashi, unknowingly to me, the ramen boss and his daughter were looking at me, their expressions unreadable.

After dinner, Kakashi dropped me off at the Nara's home because he had work to do for tomorrow's big day. "Hey, if you're lucky, you might even get me as a sensei.", he had teased which I answered with much vigour, "I better be or else you're going to regret it." He only replied with a hair ruffle before leaving for home. I watched him as he left, his departing figure growing smaller and smaller as the distance between us increased. Up until he took a corner, I stood there. I waited for a few more moments before entering the house.

I really hope that I'll be on his team.

And Kiba. I mean, what's a team without him? We'd make the best team for kicking ass. I grinned slightly at the thought. A team with Kakashi and Kiba? Now that's something to look forward to.

XXX

I entered the class after Shikamaru and smiled slightly at our newly graduated friends. Most of them were excited, talking at high notes and playing.

"Hey, what're you doing here, Naruto? This isn't the place for drop outs, you're not supposed to be here unless you're graduated.", I heard Shikamaru asked and I looked over his shoulder to see the blonde pointing at his new headband, "Oh yeah? Do you see this? Do you see this? Open your eyes, Shikamaru, it's a graduation headband, so that means we're training together! How do you like that?" Shikamaru just huffed in annoyance and I popped over, laughing at him, "Well, what do you know? You left me at Ichiraku's to get a headband, you twerp?"

The blonde saw my grinning face and smacked his forehead, "Oh, damn! I forgotten about that!" I rolled my eyes and sat on the table in front of him, a teasing smirk on my face, "Sure you did. You just missed the chance of a lifetime for me to treat you again." "Aww, come on, Mononoke-chan!", Naruto whined as he leaned over to me, "How about I treat you and you don't turn up? Then we'll be even." I snickered and flicked his headband, "I don't think it works like that, you blunt walnut."

"You're both such a drag. I'm going to Chouji.", Shikamaru groaned at me as he left us goofballs to ourselves. Before I could talk to Naruto again, shouts of "I got here first!" made us turned our heads. My eyes lidded in annoyance.

Don't even tell me.

Ino and Sakura are at it again. Whining, fighting, rivalling each other. Don't they even get tired of it? I'm tired just by looking at those two. Naruto on the other hand, looks like a little kid that saw candy. Oh right, I think he likes Sakura. Sighing, I watched as Sakura came prancing over, her eyes shining.

"Good morning, Sakura-chan!", Naruto greeted but was very manly being pushed away by Sakura as she greeted somebody behind me, "Good morning, Sasuke-kun!"

I blinked and turned around on my seat on the table. Oh, there he is. I never noticed the Uchiha was sitting there until now. The boy looked over to her, his expression unblinking. Wow, rude.

I snorted out of disbelief when Sakura asked femininely, "Mind if I sit next to you?"

Girls and their fanatics. I'm a girl but you don't see me grovelling like that. That's just disgusting.

And obviously Ino had to come along and go, "Back off, Forehead. I'm sitting next to Sasuke-kun!"

"I was here first!"

"I walked in the classroom first, everybody saw it!", Ino countered and I just said in mock dismay, placing a hand on my collarbone, looking dramatically shocked, "Are you sure it's everybody, Ino-chan? I don't think I've seen any of you come in till now." Both girls looked at me, both with different expressions. Sakura had one of 'Yay, she's on my side!' and Ino's was just 'I'm going to kill this girl!'

"Stay out of this, Mononoke!", Ino threatened and I shrugged, "Whatever you say, Twinkle Toes. But if anyone should sit with Sasuke, a duck would be more appropriate since his hair looks like one." I laughed at my own joke. Man, I'm hilarious.

The girls glared at me with so much hate, it should have turn me into ash. Well, should. Not like I care.

"If anyone's sitting with Sasuke, it should be me since I was here before any of you!", a girl piped up and another one aaannd another one. Then before I could make my escape, a whole horde of them were around me. What have I gotten myself into? I sighed and stood on the table, causing everyone to look at me.

Talk about being stealthy.

"Woah, don't mind me. Keep at it. I'll just be taking my leave now.", I said with hands raised as I walked backwards on the table. Suddenly, I nudged into something and I turned around.

Woops.

Sasuke's and Naruto's lips were locked on each other. I tried to muffled a laugh that was threatening to blast out but it managed to come out in a small squeak of air. I felt my cheeks puffing up as I coughed a little looking at the duo. They parted and began to gag, holding on to their throats as if they wanted to cough their intestines out.

Finally, I snorted and couldn't hold it in anymore. I burst out laughing, tears rolling down my face as I clutched my stomach. I almost died from choking after that fit of laughter.

"It's all your fault, Mononoke!", Ino accused but Sakura pointed at Naruto, "I'm so going kill you, NARUTO!" Well, frankly speaking, Naruto was the one that stole Sasuke's first kiss, which, also frankly speaking, most girls here would murder for. I leaped to the row after and landed on an empty seat behind Sasuke, fleeing from danger. Thankfully, the other girls weren't paying attention to me but were more focused on the innocent blonde.

Shikamaru was sitting beside me and he smirked, "Well done, now you're on a lot of people hit list." I lifted my shoulders, my mouth spread in a smile, "Maybe. But poor Naruto. He was at the wrong place at the wrong time." The Nara just shook his head and laughed as said sad soul was getting beaten up.

X

"Alright, listen up!", Iruka-sensei called from the front as everyone quiet down. I looked down at Naruto, pitying him. He got beaten up so bad, his mom probably can't recognize him. Once Iruka's had total attention, he continued, "Starting today, you are all official ninjas but you're all still Genin. It's going to get harder from here on out. You all will be grouped into three man squads, where you will accomplish missions under a Jounin teacher."

"Hmm, I wonder who's going to be on Sasuke-kun's team.", I heard Ino chastised and Sakura glared at her, "Who knows?" Rolling my eyes, I lay my head on my crossed arms. Well, whoever it is, I wouldn't want to be on any of their teams.

"We've arranged the groups such that overall abilities are equivalent.", Iruka said and he lifted a few papers, "I will now announce them."

As he began listing out the teams and their members, I counted the class room. That's when I got confused. There were 31 of us. To be divided into three man teams, that would mean that either one team would have four members. But that would be going against the rules of a three man squad. Then again, what about the single lonely soul?

"Next, team seven. Uzumaki Naruto. Haruno Sakura.", After Iruka-sensei gave the news, Naruto stood up and whooped while Sakura's head drooped.

"And Uchiha Sasuke." This time, their reactions were reversed.

"Oh, and Mononoke." I'm sorry, he said, what now?

I lifted my head up in fear as Iruka continued, "Because the Jounin that was assigned to this team had requested for you, you will be part of Team Seven as well."

"WHAT."

I stared at him before looking down at my new team mates who were, despite odds, were in a gawd damn row before me. He must be joking, right?

Uncle Duckbutt, Croaking Pink Pirate, and Knucklenuts Blondie?

You've got to be kidding me. This is my team? I mean, Naruto, I could handle but Sasuke's got a stick so far up his ass, he could be barking wood. Pun maybe intended.

And not to mention Iruka-sensei heaped a fangirl into the mix.

WHAT HAVE I DONE WRONG IN MY PAST LIFE TO DESERVE THIS?

"Now moving on, Team Eight. Hyuga Hinata. Inuzuka Kiba. And Aburame Shino.", Iruka-sensei continued.

Dammit, I'm not even on the same team as Kiba! I'm probably going to die a horrible death. I can see it. I saw Kiba looking at me apologetically and I made the saddest face I could, causing him to snigger.

That's when I raised my hand, "But sensei! A four man team? Isn't that against the rules?" Iruka-sensei looked at me and sighed, "Although four man squads are rare, they're not unheard of. And we have the Hokage's permission on this. So you guys are in a team. Is that clear?"

"But-"

"Alright, let's continue.", Iruka-sensei said as he butt in my 'But'. It was clear that the discussion was over and my fate is written, probably by the devil.

Ino glared at me, "Okay, Sakura is one thing. How are YOU so lucky to get on Sasuke's team?" I sighed and looked at her in disappointment, "You mean bad luck? I guess I've got plenty of those."

"I don't get why girls like a guy like him.", Shikamaru remarked, his face full of boredom and annoyance rolled in one. But that's how he usually look like so I don't suppose you know when is he ever not annoyed or bored. Ino thumped her fists on the table, "Don't you even know that, Shikamaru?"

"I'm not a girl.", he deadpanned and she sighed dismissively, "That's why you're not popular. I wouldn't want to be in a team with a guy like you."

Don't jinx it, kid.

"Team 10. Yamanaka Ino. Nara Shikamaru.", the voice of doom announced.

I told you so.

Shikamaru smirked at her, "I'm sorry, what was it about you not wanting to be in a team with me?" She gave him a dirty look.

"And Akimichi Chouji."

Defeated, Ino held her head in her hands, whining at her luck. I almost felt sorry for her if I wasn't so busy pitying myself. "So that's it for the groups.", Iruka concluded.

"Iruka-sensei, why is a top student like me in a group with this guy?", I heard Naruto complain. Attaboy. Get yourself in trouble. "Sasuke graduated with the highest scores, while you, Naruto, on the other hand had the worst." The class's laughter filled the room as Iruka continued, "This happens because we want to evenly divide abilities between the groups."

I sighed and began to ignore them. Man, what a joke. But since I'm one of them, it makes me the punch line.

"Seems like you've got yourself some new friends.", I heard Shikamaru uttered beneath Naruto's boisterous voice and I scowled at him, "You too." Sighing, he rested his head against his hand as he looked at me, "I've got Chouji. Ino's troublesome but she's not the worst." Groaning, I smacked my forehead on the table, "I would gladly change places with her." He chuckled at my grumpiness, "I bet."

Sighing for the final time, I sat up straighter and stretched my arms, trying to have a positive outlook instead, "I guess I have to live with it." I heard a chuckle beside me, "Good luck with that."

"Don't jinx it, buddy.", I glowered at Shikamaru and he watched me thoughtfully, "Now that I think about it, who do you think requested for you?" I lifted my shoulders, "Not a clue." I did have someone in mind but knowing him, he's probably too lazy to do anything that troublesome. But then again, Kakashi always gave the best surprises...

"Alright, after lunch, your respective Jounins will come to pick you up. Until then, you're dismissed.", Iruka-sensei settled and left the classroom. I whimpered as I stretched my body. Since that's over-

"Meet me at the balcony later!", I heard Ino commanded Shika as she ran off to pass the message to Chouji. He waved dismissively and looked over to me, "What about you? You gonna go with them?" I smirked at his concern, my fist bumping his arm, "Don't worry. I can tie my shoelaces and everything. I'll go cuddle wuddle with my team later. You go on without me."

He shook his head before stuffing his hands in his pockets, "Well, see you at home." "Yeah." With my reply, he left to go off with Cho-chan. The crowd in the class began to thin out as the teams went for lunch together while others hang out with their besties for the last time before going their separate ways later. I sighed and leaned against the chair, putting my legs up on the table, as I thought about what to do.

Well, I'm in a team now.

Which means that there would need to be teamwork to make all this ninja shit work.

Which also means that I have to be a good team player and get to know my teammates.

But I suppose Naruto would want to get to know Sakura, and Sakura would want to get to know the Uchiha, and Uchiha boy would want to get to know about how to get rid of us. Yup, that about sums it up. So, guess I'll take on a challenge and make buddies with His Majesty.

Sighing as I realized I've got my work cut out for me, I began to sniff the air.

Right-o, got the Uchiha's scent. Now, all that's left is to track him.

Heaving myself up while trying to think of ways to motivate myself, I began to follow the smell.

And I must say, I was honestly surprised when I got to a room where his scent stopped.

The door was closed and I could hear some grunting inside. Curious, I pushed the door open and the sight before me made me blinked in bewilderment for a second or so before my brain registered what was happening.

Sasuke was on the ground, tied up and gagged. He gnarl a little when he saw me, his face lifting up. "I see you're in quite a bind.", I punned and he rolled his eyes with a groan. Chuckling, I crouched down to him. Whoever got him in this mess got a pretty harsh way to seal his mouth up. "Okay. Don't scream.", I warned and tore away the tape on his mouth in one swift motion. Shame, he didn't shriek like a banshee although his mouth was stinging with red from the sticky tape.

He snarled at me, "Untie me." I sat cross-legged in front of him with a sweet smile, "Only if you say please."

"Forget it. I'll do it myself.", Uchiha growled ever so rudely and began to wriggle against the knots. Once proven that he was stuck, after a moment or two, he grudgingly looked away, "Please."

"See, that wasn't so hard, now was it?", I beamed and lifted my palm upwards. A shimmer appeared and an ice kunai formed in my hands. He blinked in surprise at the kunai but he chose not to point it out. As I was reaching over him to cut the ropes, I mused, "So which talented human being kidnapped you? I really must get his number for pest control."

"Hn.", the Uchiha didn't reply and just as I was about to think he wouldn't answer out of embarrassment, he said under his breath, "Naruto." The ropes loosened and he shrugged them out. Fascinated, I smirked at him as I leaned closer, trying to juice it out of him, "Do tell." He watched me for a moment as I stared into his dark eyes. It was almost as if he was wondering whether or not to humiliate himself.

"Shadow Clones.", he said finally and I pricked up, "Shadow Clones? That's surprising." He dipped his head once, "And a Replacement Jutsu at the same time." Clearly finished, he got up. I followed after and watched as he walked past me.

"Oh, you're most welcomed, Your Majesty.", I said sarcastically as I trudged after him. The jerk ignored me as he walked around the corner. "And I definitely know where you're going.", I said after when he continued on resolutely , still insisting on neglecting my presence.

"I've got an idiot to find.", Uchiha replied after three minutes and I threw my hands in the air in exasperation, "Oh, hey, it talks! And what is your master plan when you do?" The Uchiha glared at me over his shoulder, "Are you going to keep asking questions? And why are you following me?"

I rolled my eyes at his lack of judgement, "Hey, we're a team. In case the lonely duckling is so blissfully uneducated, it's called 'getting to know each other'. And I want to make sure you don't murder Naruto." He stopped and turned around to face me, "We don't need to get to know each other. Now get lost." I planted my hands on my hips as I levelled his glare, "Listen, Uchiha. Normally I wouldn't give a seagull's ass about you and your woes but we're lumped together as a team. As a ninja with some common sense, I am trying to make friends with my comrades." I stepped closer to him, our bodies only inches apart, "You got a team now, Cockatoo brain. Act like it."

He scoffed and turned around on his heel, "I don't need a team. You idiots will just slow me down."

I trotted faster and blocked his way, "Think about it, bird ass. Ninjas are always in teams. Why? So you've got each others backs. I don't plan on dying just because some high and mighty comrade wants to be selfish." Done with my speech, I walked faster in the direction he's heading, "Now. Let's go clobber that junkhead's buns."

When we got outside, I spotted Sakura almost at the same time as she spotted the Uchiha. What were the odds?

"Sasuke-kun!", she called before stopping short when she saw me. Obviously her eyes were all for Uchiha that she couldn't see me first even though I was way ahead of the blackbird. "What're you doing with Sasuke-kun?", she asked suspiciously and I lifted a shoulder at him, "Ask the grumpy old troll."

I suddenly noticed the change in the air behind me and glanced. Ooh, someone's testy. With a few words said, Uchiha shuts her down when she began to squealed at him. Though I can't help feeling a little sorry for her, I mean, the kid's just infatuated, there's no need to be so harsh but then again, she kind of deserves it. Besides, she was a sweet kid before all these fangirling snotshits.

As Uchiha stomped off to search for Naruto, I walked over to her, "I wouldn't blame him for saying that to you, you know." Her eyes grew poisonous when she looked at me, "What do you know?" I shook my head in amazement. Temper, temper.

Smirking at her, I shrugged, "Not much. Just that if I was in his shoes and I had a ton of fangirls annoying me every bloody day of my life, heck, I might be just as moody as the next guy." I watched the Uchiha's retreating back, "And why not? The guy's alone. He doesn't socialize, doesn't talk and doesn't care. It's a way for him to protect himself."

"From what?", Sakura sneered slightly and I shook my head, "I have no idea why we're acquainted in the first place, Sakura chan. And it never cease to amaze me how little people use their heads. He's avoiding those with the likes of you." Uninterested to lower my IQ any lower, I began to stepped away, grinning innocently, as I stuffed my hands in my pockets, my thumbs hanging out, "But hey, what do I know, right? I'm just another lousy ninja."

XXX

"You found him yet?", I asked as I managed to keep up with Sir Birdass. He glanced at me for a heartbeat before walking off. But not before shooting me a snide remark, "And here I thought I managed to get rid of you." Realizing that he's beginning to talk like a normal human being, I grinned at him, "Aw, how sweet. I hate you too, Uchiha." Suddenly, I stopped as my nose picked up a tell-tale scent of Naruto. It was strong and smells strongly of his energy.

The Uchiha, curious, turned back to look at me but my attention was on the toilet in front of us.

As if on cue, Naruto came bursting out with a terrible stench following him. Heck, what did he eat? His expressive features etched out a very crabby look as he held on to his gut. He looked up and spotted the Uchiha before pointing his finger at our direction, "You! How'd you get out?!"

"A simple escape jutsu.", the ungrateful donut replied indifferently and I snorted, "Sorry to interrupt but it's also called getting help." His Majesty glared at me sideways for a heartbeat before returning his attention on the blonde who was all riled up. His face was red and he whipped out a hand seal.

I whistled when five or so clones came hovering in the air, a whole lot of orange filling the halls. Now I understand why the Uchiha got his panties in a knot. This is literally the same guy who couldn't poop a proper clone a day or two ago.

GRRUUUGGHHH.

Large growls echoed in the hall and all of the Narutos' landed on the ground, clutching their stomachs before running off to the toilet, pushing against each as they fight for the shit throne.

Then it dawned over me what was going on. Snorting at first, I couldn't help but blew my cheeks out and begin to howl with laughter. He's actually fighting his clones for the bathroom! I can't even! I had to lean over as I clutch my stomach, hardly able to stand with all my glee. Man, this is precious!

Now this, is something you don't see everyday.

"Well, what do you know? I guess Karma just bit his ass for you.", I said as I wiped my tears, nudging the Uchiha with my fist. He snorted, one side of his mouth twitching upwards, "I don't think I want to go anywhere near his ass." I giggled, "Yeah, you can say that again."

As the Narutos' were squabbling, I heard a growl coming out of my own stomach. The Uchiha gave me an amused expression, "Do you need to fight with them too?" I gave him a look that loosely translates into "Are you being serious right now?"

"I haven't had my lunch yet, Your Majesty.", I peeved at him with a mock curtsy and he smirked, "Hn.", before walking away. I raised an eyebrow at his randomness and just as I was about to leave for food, he looked over his shoulder at me, "Are you coming?"

"I'm not your lapdog.", I deadpanned and his smirk lifted sightly, "My treat." I placed a hand on my collarbone dramatically, "Are you possessed? Who are you and where's Captain Duck?" He rolled his eyes before walking away, "It's your choice."

"Hell yes, I'm coming! Once in a lifetime chance to use your money, I'd better get something pricey.", I replied vigorously before prancing up to him.

X

AH THE NAMES I CAN COME UP FOR THE HIGH AND MIGHTY UCHIHA. It's super fun to do it. And the amount of sass coming from Mononoke in this chapter is crazy. Don't worry, she's the sass queen so you guys are going to see plenty of sarcasm and *snaps hand in 7 formation* SASS.

ANYWAY, I'VE GONE AHEAD AND DUMPED MONO'S ASS IN TEAM 7 BECAUSE KASHI PROMISED. And who am I to mess up the Ino-Shika-Cho group. I mean, really. What am I thinking? HAHAHA. SO YAS. NEXT CHAP. MEETING WITH GOOD OLD KASHI. (And it's obvious he requested for her. How could he disappoint the kid?) And I've read many a fic that dumps Sakura ass so that there would be a three man cell. Though as much as I think she's a useless piece of devil's constipated poop at first, but hey, at least she gets badass useful later. So idk bout you guys but what do you think?

OH AND I'M GIVING YOU GUYS DOUBLE FACTS DAY. YAYYY. (Just because I can mweheheheh)

Fact#7: As you can see above and many examples, Mononoke can scent out and track people. Everyone has their own personal scent and it's hard to describe them, but to make it simple, Mononoke can smell out the personalities and energy of any individual she's met.

Fact#8: Due to her nightmares, Mononoke always thrashes in her sleep. Which causes anyone who sleeps near her to get beaten up. Except for Kakashi. He makes sure to hug her when she's sleeping so she can't really move under his weight. Problem solved. (But can you imagine Shika? But he doesn't tell her though. I wonder why.)