Sitara

The moment Marcus and I arrived at my apartment, I sped off for the bathroom. Unable to withhold my urge to vomit any longer, I began puking my guts out into the toilet shamelessly. Vile chunks of undigested food and stomach acid propelled from my mouth. God, it reeked, and it tasted awful. Marcus appeared behind me. His fingers combed the loose strands of my hair away from my face as I barfed. The churning contractions in my stomach were so uncomfortable and brutal, I was practically in tears.

I sat on the cold tiled floor for a good minute or two, purging my system and crying my eyes out at the same time. Eventually my stomach calmed, and my heaving ceased.

Marcus reached over and flushed the toilet for me. "Feel any better?"

"I feel horrible," I murmured, wiping my mouth with the sleeve of my shirt. "Do you have any idea how humiliating this is?"

"Yeah, I do actually. I've been in your position multiple times." He took my hand and helped me to my feet.

I could hardly stand straight, and I still felt lightheaded. Even so, my intoxication alone wasn't enough to rid me of my guilt from being caught with Oliver. Granted, I wasn't going to kiss him, but considering the intimate position Marcus found us in, it was gonna be really hard convincing him of the truth. And trying to do so while drunk would be a disaster. Hopefully my desperate, heartfelt apologies would suffice for now.

"I'm a horrible person," I said, my speech slurred.

Marcus gave me a once-over, and then shook his head. "You need a shower." He stepped past me and twisted the hot water knob. Warm water rained down from the showerhead. I glanced at myself in the mirror. My tear streaked cheeks were caked with sandy residue from my embarrassing fall at the beach. It was all over me, on my clothes, in my hair… Marcus was right, I did need a shower.

"You're gonna need something clean to change into," Marcus said. "Be right back." He disappeared into the hall, and returned a short while later with a white t-shirt and comfy, black cotton shorts from my wardrobe.

"Thanks," I murmured as he handed me my spotless attire.

"No problem. I'll be right outside if you need me."

He departed, shutting the door behind him. I stripped off my sandy clothes and shoes, and stumbled into the shower. Hot, steaming water caressed my skin and began cleansing my sandy hair.

Despite what had happened on the beach, and the fact that he had just woken up from a coma, he was still going out of his way to take care of me. I guess some things never change. It was only natural for him after all, he was the most caring man I've ever met. Sometimes to a fault— a person as tenderhearted as him was bound to have their kindness be taken advantage of every now and then.

I hope he didn't think I was taking his kindness for granted. I knew I could be difficult sometimes, but that didn't mean I was ungrateful. I needed him, more than I cared to admit. If only I was better at showing him how much I appreciated his thoughtfulness, instead of giving him a hard time at every turn…

My shower was long and soothing. The steaming hot water cleansed me of my impurities, and rejuvenated my senses. My mind felt much clearer, my drunken haze had faded away. Thank God.

Once I finished my shower, I leisurely dried myself off with a clean towel and slipped into the fresh clothes Marcus gave me. I withdrew from the bathroom and entered my bedroom, only to find Marcus laid across my bed on his side, snoring lightly. He must have drifted asleep during my long shower. I wanted to wake him up so we could talk, but his slumber looked peaceful, his chest rising and falling rhythmically. Careful not to disrupt him, I eased down into the comfort of my bed beside him.

I wanted nothing more than to curl up next to him, but after what happened tonight with Oliver, I wasn't sure if that was the best idea. He probably needed space. I turned away from him and pulled my blanket over my shoulder instead.

I tried to get some rest myself, but I couldn't stop shifting around to steal a glance at Marcus every five minutes. For some irrational reason, I was worried he wasn't going to wake back up— that he'd slip into a coma again. I was tempted to shake him, just to make sure he was okay, but I was too much of a chicken to actually go through with it. Deep down, I was afraid for him to wake up too. I had no idea where him and I stood. The uncertainty had me on edge.

My phone began to ring and vibrate noisily on my nightstand, notifying me that someone was calling. I scooped it up and quickly answered the call in a desperate attempt to silence the unruly chime. "Hello?"

"Sitara?" Wrench's synthetic voice filled my ear. "Where are you? Where's M?"

"He's with me," I answered quietly. "At my apartment."

"Oh, you guys kissed and made up already?"

"Um, not exactly."

"What? Are you guys alright?"

"We're fine, I think."

"You think?"

"Well, Marcus is sleeping."

"Christ, how much sleep does one guy need? Are you sure he's okay?"

"I don't know, comas aren't my field of expertise. But he's been pretty active for a person who just got out of one. He's probably exhausted."

"Okay. I need to wrap a couple things up at the party, then I'm coming over to check on you two. Be there in forty-five minutes." He hung up before I could protest. Welp, so much for trying to get any shuteye.

A sigh escaped Marcus' lips. "Was that Wrench?" He asked sleepily.

"Yeah, he's going to be here in about forty-five minutes," I replied. "He's worried about us, you mostly though. Are you okay?"

He took a moment to stretch before lazily sitting up. "My muscles are stiff as fuck, and everything feels weird."

"Weird how?"

"Not sure how to explain it, girl." He held his hands out in front of him and studied them intently. "I don't remember it being this hard to move. It takes conscious effort for me to even lift a finger, movement doesn't come naturally anymore. Nothing feels normal right now. I feel like I'm dreaming." He gazed at me. "But I ain't dreaming, right? I'm awake, aren't I?"

I laid a hand on his lap. "Can you feel that?"

He nodded.

"Well there you go, you're not dreaming. Welcome to the real world." I smiled. "You were in a coma for a while, but you're awake now Marcus."

"But none of this feels real," he scrubbed an unsteady hand over his face. "I don't understand how I got here. Shit just isn't adding up."

Jeez, I didn't realize he was this confused about everything. He seemed relatively normal earlier. Clearly, a screw must had come loose in his noggin between now and the time I spent in the shower. But given the circumstances, he was holding himself together pretty well for a guy who's been out for a whole month. It was a miracle he was able to walk and communicate at all.

"Okay Marcus, just calm down and relax." I gently removed his hat from his head and helped him out of his jacket. "We'll figure this all out together, okay?"

"Okay," he mumbled.

I set his attire aside. "What's the last thing you remember before waking up?"

His thick brows furrowed in thought. "I remember being somewhere dark and cold. I was trapped there, staring at the barrel of a gun. I couldn't move…" He paused to swallow, his muscles tensed as he recounted the awful memories. "There was a lot of pain, everything hurt. I remember wishing it would all end. I remember missing you, and worrying about leaving you behind. Everything beyond that is foggy."

An overall weighted feeling gripped my shoulders. I reached out to him, hoping to alleviate his pain, but he shifted away from my grasp. "I don't need a pity party Sitara," he stated. "You don't have to pretend like things between us haven't changed. I know you moved on."

I frowned. "I know you're upset about earlier. Can you let me explain what happened before jumping to conclusions?"

"What is there to explain? I was out for a while, with no guarantee that I'd ever wake up. I get it. I don't blame you for moving on."

"It's not like that. You've got it all wrong."

"Nah, it's cool. We never agreed to be committed to one another anyway—"

"Marcus!" I snapped, silencing him. "Will you shut up for just a second and hear me out? Please?"

He folded his arms across his chest. "Alright," he muttered. "I'm listening."

I sighed heavily, my stomach twisted in knots nervously. This was my one chance to make things right, to make him realize how wrong he was about the whole situation, so I could redeem myself and we could put this mess behind us. The pressure was on. I refused to screw this up.

"The guy you found me with at the party, Oliver, is one of our followers," I explained. "We met shortly before you showed up, he's practically a stranger. I had too much to drink, and things escalated. But honestly, regardless of how long you were gone, being with someone else felt wrong. Coma or not, it felt like I was betraying you." I hugged my knees to my chest, my gaze dropped to the white carpeted floor.

"That night I saved you from the cellar, was the longest night of my life," I continued. "I rushed you and Wrench to the hospital, I never drove so fast in my life. You lost consciousness on the way there, and God, there was so much of your blood on my hands Marcus, I thought sure you weren't going to make it. The doctors immediately took you in for surgery. It lasted hours, and I waited and waited for you to wake up. But you didn't. Then I got news from the staff that you were in a coma." I sniffed, my eyes grew wet. "I felt like my whole world came crashing down on top of me when I heard the news. I jumped to worst-case scenario. I thought you were gone for good."

"Shit," he said, his voice barely audible. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be. Although I thought you were gone, there was a tiny shred of hope left within me that refused to give up on you. I was at your bedside day after day, from dusk until dawn. I just couldn't seem to function without you, I needed to be close to you. When I wasn't, I felt empty inside."

"Every day I'd daydream about being the first thing you saw when you opened your eyes." A stiff laugh escaped me. "Gosh, I imagined it to be such an amazing moment in my mind. I figured witnessing something so rare and magical would make my patience, and all the sadness and loneliness worth it in the end. But I wasn't there for you. I'll have to live with the guilt of not being there for that special moment for the rest of my life. And to make matters worse, you found me with someone else shortly after. But do you know what hurts me the most about all of this?"

"What?"

"The fact that you don't think you're worth waiting forever for," I said softly. "Don't you know I can see straight through you? Underneath those layers of confidence and false bravado is the most tenderhearted, compassionate man I've ever met. You're a rarity, Marcus. Different— in the best way."

He gazed at me, his brown eyes softened. "Sitara…"

I cupped his stubbled cheek. "When will you realize your worth hun? How on Earth could I could move on from you? Especially after everything we've been through?"

"I don't know girl." He shrugged his drooping shoulders. "I know you were drunk, and I've been out of the picture for a while, but it hurt like a motherfucker seeing you with someone else. I didn't know what to think. I thought you forgot about everything we had."

"No, that'll never, ever happen," I muttered tearfully. "Marcus, you are amazing, good and just. You deserve someone who would wait until all Hell freezes for you. I'm sorry if my actions tonight made you feel any less than the perfect man you are. I betrayed your trust, I made a stupid mistake. You deserve so much better than me— so much better than the awful hand life has been dealing you lately. It's not fair Marcus. I hate it…"

"Come here." He pulled me into his warm embrace, my thighs straddling his lap. "Don't cry baby," he whispered into my ear softly, the side of his chiseled face nuzzling mine lovingly. "It ain't so bad. We'll get through this together alright?"

"I don't want anyone but you, I swear it."

"I know baby, it's okay. You slipped up, it happens. I don't care who or what I deserve, I'm happy so long as I have you girl. You may not be perfect, but you're perfect for me."

I gripped his shoulders and held onto him tightly, breathing in the alluring scent of his woodsy aftershave. Butterflies fluttered about my stomach. Despite the tears flowing down from my eyes, I felt elated to be in his strong arms again. Everything felt right in the world when I was in the safety of his embrace.

"You gonna be okay?" He asked, teasing his lips over my earlobe playfully.

I chuckled, shyly pulling away from him. "Hey, that tickles."

"That was the idea. I missed that beautiful smile of yours." He touched a thumb to my face, wiping away the tears still lingering on my cheeks. "It's crazy. I didn't think I'd ever see my baby again. But here we are."

"I take it you forgive me for earlier then?"

"Hmm, I dunno." He smirked. "Maybe."

"What do you mean 'maybe'? It's either you forgive me or you don't."

"Nah, you're gonna have to make it up to me. Can't let you off the hook that easy."

"So my heartfelt apology wasn't enough? Bummer."

"Hell no it wasn't. You really got your work cut out for you, my forgiveness doesn't come free girl—"

I crashed my lips against his. He winced, initially caught off guard by the sudden kiss, but soon melted into it. I wrapped my arms around him, pulling him closer. Our clinging kiss was long and lustful, allowing me more than enough time to savor the subtle, sugary goodness of mocha coffee on his lips. He tasted just as sweet as I remembered. Eventually, we both reluctantly drew away from one another to catch our breath.

"Damn," he beamed, his beautiful brown skin flushed a rosy pink. "You know what, I think I forgive you."

"So much for having my work cut out for me," I grinned. "You're adorable."

"Nuh-uh."

"Uh-huh. Especially when you're blushing. You have no idea how cute you look right now."

He chuckled, his face reddening. "Stop it. Not the flattery again."

"Aw, look at you." I pinched his blushing cheeks.

"Cut that out." Marcus' hands slipped under my shirt, his blunt fingers tickled my tummy lightly.

I cackled, shoving him away playfully. "Okay, okay! I'll stop. Sheesh."

He smiled and lifted my shirt slightly, inspecting my stomach. "Your bruises are all gone."

"Yeah, and the cut on my arm healed," I replied, gazing at the long dark scar my past wound left behind.

"Really?" He smoothed a hand over the blemish. "Weird, feels like it was festering just yesterday."

"You cleaned and bandaged it a month ago."

"I still can't believe it's been that long."

"How are you feeling? Is everything still foggy?"

"Yep." He snuggled close to me, lying his head on my chest. "Doesn't seem like it'll be easing up anytime soon."

I held his strong body in my arms, softly combing my fingers through his short, curly hair. He sighed contently, closing his eyes. We laid together in peaceful silence for quite some time. I couldn't stop thinking about the situation with Oliver earlier though. Despite everything Marcus and I have been through, the one mistake I made by almost kissing Oliver had put our entire relationship in jeopardy.

Thankfully we were able to work things out, but what if something like this happened again? The deep bond we shared could easily break apart, and things between us would never be the same. It scared me.

"Marcus?" I asked, breaking the silence.

"Yeah?"

"About earlier, when you said we never agreed to be committed to one another— what are we then?"

"We're whatever you want us to be."

"Well I don't do the whole 'friends with benefits' thing. It's overrated in my opinion."

"Then let's be more girl."

"Like… an actual couple?"

"Mhmm. I love the idea of you being mine, and I wanted to ask you, but I was waiting for the right time. I know you prefer to take things slow anyhow."

"God, I'm so tired of waiting Marcus. All I ever do is wait."

"So let's make things official then."

"Really?" I sat up, gazing at him. "Are you sure?"

He rose with me, his thick brows furrowed with concern. "Yeah, there ain't nothing stopping us, is there? I'm down to try this if you are."

"I want to, but I'm scared Marcus. I don't want to wait anymore but what if we are rushing into things?"

"Uh, I don't know. Does it really matter at this point?"

"Yes, it matters. If we take that step, and things between us don't work out, nothing will be the same. Don't you understand?" I took his hand, our fingers intertwining. "You're my best friend, and I almost lost you over some stupid guy at a party. Yes, I know it was my fault, but you get my point, right?"

"Yeah, I feel you. We don't have to take the leap if you're not ready for it, whatever makes you comfortable. But honestly, whether we make things official or not, it won't change anything. I mean, we already fuss and fight, and kiss and make up like couples do anyway. And my feelings for you only get stronger by the day."

"I know, but I don't want to break your heart and ruin this."

He cupped my chin, his eyes staring searchingly into mine. "I get that you're afraid," he said softly. "But we can only go forward from here Sitara. We're both in this too deep already."

"You're right," I frowned. "Sorry I said anything."

"Nah, don't be. I'm glad you let me know how you were feeling. Communication saves relations girl."

"No, I'm just being difficult, as always." I reclined back onto the comfort of my pillows. "I don't know how you can deal with all my crap."

"Now you're just being dramatic." He stole a furtive glance at my vulnerable body lying before him. "You ain't that bad. Well, there was that one time when you slapped the shit out of me, but I deserved it—"

"Hey, what were you looking at a second ago?" I asked.

"W-what?" He swallowed deeply. "Uh, nothing."

"You were totally checking me out, weren't you?"

A sheepish grin spread across his handsome face. "You caught me. You're so damn fine girl, I find myself staring at you all the time."

"You can do more than just look, silly."

"Yeah?"

"Of course." I parted my legs slightly, licking my lips. "Is there something, or somewhere specific you want to touch?"

His gaze darted to my breasts, and slowly lowered between my legs, his eyes smoldering with intensity. "I'm uh, not sure where to start. I see a lot of things I want to touch."

I giggled, his hesitation was always so adorable. "Well, what are you waiting for? I don't know whether we're finally going steady or not, but what I do know is, you're special to me. I trust you, more than anyone. You don't have to hold back anymore."

Marcus climbed on top of me, his full lips brushed over my neck lightly. Slowly, he planted a tantalizing trail of delicate kisses down my jawline to my collarbone. "I can be your best friend," he murmured between each soft peck. "I can be your boyfriend, your lover, and all of the above, just say the word." His hands clasped my thighs, massaging them gently. "You want me, and I want you baby… so fuck it. Let's make this happen. Let's be together."

"Marcus…" I moaned, shamelessly exposing my neck to him. His sweet kisses eventually became much more passionate, his tongue glided over my skin, teeth nibbling lightly. My breath quickened, the pleasure caused my entire body to flush with warmth.

My phone began vibrating and ringing like mad again.

"You picking that up?" Marcus asked.

"Hell no," I grumbled. "Let it ring."

He gripped my hips, pressing me to him, our bodies molding together. We grinded on one another, the hot stiffness in the crotch of his jeans rhythmically rubbing up against me had my core boiling with heat.

Marcus' palm smoothed along my side to my breast, his fingertips teased my nipple tenderly through the cotton of my shirt. His other hand settled between my legs, touching the wetness of my core through my damp shorts.

His sensual caresses comforted me in ways words never could. He sucked and fondled my swollen flesh for what felt like forever, and all I could do was writhe under his powerful body, gasps and involuntary moans escaping my lips from the pleasure. I ached for him. I wanted him so bad.

"Marcus, please," I begged, my voice barely a whisper. "Please, I can't take it anymore…"

He smirked. "What was that? Speak up girl."

I tugged at the waistband of his jeans. "Stop being such a tease."

"Come again? I can't hear you."

"You're such a douche."

He laughed, and pulled away, peeling his sweater off. My eyes admired his bare, beautifully sculpted chest as he worked on removing my shorts. I ran my hands over the hard, chiseled planes of his abdomen. Once my shorts were off and out of the way, he dipped low, his tongue swirled over my inner thigh.

He gazed at me, his face inching closer and closer to my core. I squirmed nervously. "H-hey…" I tapped his broad shoulder.

He froze, his brows furrowed with concern. "What's wrong?"

"Come back up here." I opened my arms to him.

He followed my demand, coming nose to nose with me. "Oral ain't your thing, huh?"

"Well, I've never tried it before. It's just embarrassing having your face down there, you know? I feel like your staring."

"I was staring. You're beautiful Sitara, don't be shy."

"It's hard not to be."

"Well, you can blindfold me if you want. Might make you feel more comfortable."

"What?" I chuckled. "No, it wouldn't. Can't we get all sexy the old fashion way? And gradually work our way up to the kinky stuff?"

"Of course girl. Anything you want." He pecked my lips. "How long do we have before Wrench gets here?"

I glanced at the digital clock on my nightstand. "Crap. Only about ten minutes."

"Shit. I can't make love to you in ten minutes."

"We can probably fit in a quickie."

"Tempting, but nah, our first time can't be a quickie. That's just wrong girl. Nope, I rather wait. I can still take care of you though. Granted, we can just chill and cuddle instead. I'm always down for that."

"Cuddling sounds nice, but what's the alternative?"

"Well, my hands are good for more than just hacking. They're kinda stiff right now though. I can use the exercise."

I nodded. "Okay handsome. Work your magic."

He flashed me a warm smile. "Alright, I promise I won't stare. Just lay back and let me take care of you."

I did exactly as he said, repositioning my head more comfortably on my pillow and letting out a sigh, the tension in my muscles loosened. His mouth met mine softly, his tongue licked my lips for entry. I wasted little time sucking in its hot length. Our tongues wrestled and pressed against one another passionately in a sloppy kiss.

Marcus settled his hand between my thighs, his thumb stroked my moist folds ever so gently. Gradually, his soft touch advanced to my clit. I let out a deep sigh, my heart raced with anticipation. My temperature sky rocked. I ached to be filled. My body was on fire.

He continued to tease and massage my wet, swollen tightness for a moment longer. I squirmed impatiently, biting my lips.

"Marcus," I shivered. "Come on… I need you."

His finger slid inside me tortuously slow. Two more penetrated me soon after, filling my core and stretching me open. Toes curling, I gasped, my muscles tightening. I raked my nails across his smooth, muscular back, and buried my face in his neck, muffling my whimpers.

He began to thrust into me at a moderate pace. I wrapped my legs around him, my hips riding his fingers.

His free hand slipped under my shirt, squeezing and fondling my breast tenderly. His rhythmic thrusts picked up the pace, his fingers drilling inside me. The intensity of his thumb working my clit in firm circles as he fingered me sent jolts of pleasure throughout my core.

The overwhelming sensation ignited my insides, spiraling me toward an orgasm. Pleasurable aches and spasms spread from my core, and out to my extremities, causing them to flush and tingle.

"Talk to me girl," he demanded, his voice husky. "You like it right there?"

"Yes!" I yelled, my muffled voice quaking. "Don't stop! God, it feels so fucking good Marcus."

"Come for me baby." His tongue glided over the hollow of my throat sensually.

I shuddered, pleasure engulfed my body, flooding me with sensation. The tension building within me reached its peak, and I was swept up in ecstasy, all my thoughts and worries faded into nothingness. I rocked against his thrusting fingers, riding out my orgasm.

The intensity of my climax left me limp and boneless. A state of deep relaxation, contentment and peace gripped me. Everything felt so right, and for the life of me, I wouldn't let Marcus go, even after his fingers withdrew from me, my arms wrapped securely around his neck.

"Sitara?" He asked. "You okay?"

"You're too good to me." I muttered. "I owe you now."

"Nah, you don't owe me a thing. If there's ever anything I can do to make you feel good, the pleasure is all mine." He licked my juices from his fingers shamelessly.

I shuddered. "Wow… Did that taste okay?"

"Mhmm. You taste sweet girl."

"Seriously?"

"Yep. Damn, I wish we had more time. I'd be down for a round two, just to get another taste."

I giggled shyly. "Marcus?"

"What's up?"

I pecked his strong, stubbled jawline, and gazed into his soft brown eyes. He was so amazing, the best thing a girl could ever ask for. All these feelings I had for him— it couldn't be infatuation, or lust. My adoration ran too deep, and felt too real. It had to be love. It had to be. "I…" I paused, my voice cracked with emotion.

He smiled sweetly. "What is it baby?"

"I love—"

Knock. Knock. Knock.

Frantic pounding on the front door of my apartment stole our attention. "Let me in!" Wrench's voice called out urgently from the other side. "Hurry!"

"What the Hell?" I flinched. "Impatient much?" I snatched my shorts from the side of the bed and slipped them on.

"Can you get that?" Marcus asked, grabbing his sweater. "I gotta wash my hands."

"Sure."

He took off for the bathroom. I crawled out of bed and unlocked the door. Wrench charged inside, his spiked jacket, blue denim jeans and sinewy, tattooed arms was coated in crimson red.

"W-Wrench?" I stammered, backing away. He had dried up blood all over him, someone else's I had guessed, he didn't appear to be wounded. "What in the world happened?"

Ten chapters down! We've come a long way together, how are you guys enjoying the story so far? Let me know!