Authors note: Hey boys and girls! I'm back once again, I do bring deepest apologize for not having anything back in February. So, to make up for it I'm currently writing two more chapters of the Rabbiting and well I do hope this one will be also good. Frankly, I was always worried whenever I write such chapters, dunno why...Just kinda do. Anyway! Hope you enjoy and well criticism and everything else is always welcomed!

Chapter 14: Happy Face

The blazing sun was over Sahara Square, bathing the vast desert zone in its daily dose of scorching heat. For most animals, this would be the literal depiction of hell, but for the indigenous population, it was just the right stuff. Of course, the zone weren't just composed of barren sands, as it had plenty of rest stops (who in keeping with the Square's general image looked and awful lot like oases) that were meant for travelers to cool off and recharge their batteries at.

Near one of these was a parked muscle car, and next to it was the lone figure of an ocelot. She was currently occupied with adjusting the scope on a sniper rifle, the song "Sympathy for the Devil" playing out loud from the inside of her car; a choice of song that she found kind of ironic.
Taking a deep breath, she then took aim and pulled the trigger, blasting one of one of the many target dummies she had set up in the far distance to pieces.
This was her way of dealing with stress, a rare occasion all on its own, as she couldn't recall the last time she had done this. However, right now she wasn't much as stressed as she was concerned, and it wasn't about the job. As far as she saw it, things seemed to be progressing just like how her employee had wanted, so what was bothering her?
Maybe it was just the feeling that this job was starting to become boring. Lowering her rifle and narrowing her eyes a little, Alexis then took aim once more as her mind started to drift.

When she was but a child she had been told that her eyes looked different, that they were scary and lacked the "color" you'd see in most children's eyes. Pale blue eyes were rare among ocelots, and from what she had gathered, people thought that it made her face look dim and almost hollow.
Just for that she had been constantly made fun off by other children her age, sometimes even beaten up for it.
One time when she had come back home with a bleeding lip, her old man given her a disdainful look and told her that she shouldn't take crap from a few punks, and unless she enjoyed beatings, she should do something about it.
A young Alexis had taken these words to heart, vividly recalling how she had bent the fingers of one particular bully backward until they had snapped like candy canes. Boy did this make him scream!
Yet, the little ocelot didn't feel any satisfaction for defeating her foe. In fact, she felt nothing at all. The injured kid and the other children began to yell at her, saying what a horrible creature she was and that she should die. This was the first time that Alexandra could recall herself wondering. Maybe she should die?
She had asked her old man about that the very same night. Her father, the delightful individual that he was, had ordered her to never think of such things again, right before painfully reprimanding her by pulling down the back of her pants and spanking her bottom red with a shoehorn.
As long as that stinging pain had clung to her, the thought that her father had tried to chastise out of her clung ever longer, and as she grew older, she would on occasion return to that general idea. If she didn't feel anything about anything, then what was the point of it? And if she should die, then the question was how.
Killing herself wasn't an option, not just because of the religious views she had inherited, but also because it didn't feel right. If she were to die, someone would have to kill her.
The neighborhood she grew up in wasn't the safest by far, so the chances of dying that way seemed high enough, yet every time she found herself in a bit of trouble, she would always come out of it alive and kicking.
As she grew, her old man repeatedly told her about the war and how many of his brothers in arms had lost their lives, and how he himself barely lived through it. Maybe that was why she thought it was the logical thing to pursue, and most likely, that was why she had signed up… Despite her father constantly telling her how the war could destroy a person's mind and soul. Needless to say, the aging ocelot didn't take kindly to this (she bet that if she was still small enough, he would have re-acquainted her with Mr. Shoehorn) and promptly disowned her. Their contact between this and his death had been strained at best, not helped by the old man's increasingly degrading mental and physical health.

Blasting another target, she popped out a fresh shell; the ocelot began to wonder why she had bothered to be by his side on his deathbed at all, or for that matter, fulfilling his last wish to have his ashes scattered in the South China Sea where many of his fellow soldiers had previously fallen. There weren't a lot of pleasant memories that she could recall about him as a father, except a handful of her earliest recollections, one of these being a mutual love for pineapple popsicles.
Taking aim once again, her mind started to drift away again, the old Plato dripping away and being replaced with a new one.

The military wasn't easy, but she had expected as much. After all, one had to be tough if they wanted to fight and survive, but that's also where Alexis encountered one particularly stupid CO who had put the moves on her. She was ashamed at the memory of falling for this and actually losing her virginity to that disgusting shit-eater, as she had found out that he was a married man and that she had just been some side dish. After repaying him by breaking his jaw, Alexis got herself a beating by him in return, suffering a couple of cracked ribs and a mild concussion, made all the more painful on account of him now having owned her in more ways than one.

That was why she did not like getting touched.

After that whole ordeal, nobody dared to approach her, but the CO didn't leave things hanging and made sure that she'd always get the short end of the stick and get assigned to the suicide missions, not knowing that he was practically giving her an early birthday present.
But she lived through every mission. Of course she'd receive injuries during battle, but in the grand scheme of things she would still survive and end up completing her task. While her companions would always congratulate her and claim how she was blessed with luck, Alexis would start to think that she wasn't meant to die on the battlefield like she had initially thought, or simply that her enemies weren't strong enough.

When her last tour was approaching she had gotten really bored of the military and was more than ready to leave. But the CO wasn't about to let her go that easy, and one night on the training grounds of the army base; he had turned up to challenge her to a so-called "fair" fight. However, he hadn't counted on the fact that this was not the same greenhorn that he had taken advantage of in the beginning, but a full-fledged career soldier. Even with a knife to help him, the snow leopard had been an easy match for the ocelot. He had even begged and cried for mercy as Alexis had pressed his own knife pressed against his throat. At that moment, the ocelot had felt something: a strong tinge of disgust and anger. This person had gone out of his way to make things a living hell for her and was now grovelling before her and crying like a little cub. She just left, figuring that he wasn't even worth to kill.

Another shot, this one actually missing its target making her curse under her breath and look at her bandaged up hand, seeing how it trembled a little. She narrowed her eyes as she shook her palm and tried to take aim while thinking of other things.

After the military, she didn't do many major things; instead, she just drifted around as a freelancer and did whatever jobs she could manage.
During one of these gigs, she had actually ended up saving the life of a kid, who had turned out to be the son of the local bratva, who's old man had then invited Alexis to join his crew. She was initially reluctant but had then realized that if she joined, she'd probably find her end in a possible gang shootout or fighting the police.
When she was part of the bratva, she would hear the familiar whispers of how her face seemed blank and emotionless, like the eerily life-like features of a doll. It was the leader's son, the big brother of the kid she had saved, a corsac fox named Kolia, had told her that she should try to smile more and act polite, as it would make people more comfortable around her, not to mention highlight her cuteness. So, that's what she had been doing since, wearing her "happy face" anywhere she went.

Kolia and his father Vladimir was an odd bunch, the older fox being part of the "old ways" and always following them to the letter.
Kolia had been more of a rebel with a strange love for fancy clothes and historical weapons, his weapon of choice having been a C96 Mauser. His rebellious streak had occasionally gotten him into many sticky situations, from which his father would occasionally bail him out of. Alexis soon ended up as his personal guardian, in order to make sure that he was kept safe and in check. The young man treated her very kindly and with respect, but sadly enough, their friendship had ended in a… Tragic manner. His main weakness was that he suffered from extreme substance abuse, which more than often led to his erratic behavior. During one his many parties, he had under the influence of some obscure drug killed the niece of another bratva boss, who was a long-time friend of Vladimir and a most beneficial associate. Not wishing to break this partnership, the old fox decided to sacrifice his oldest son, with Alexis acting the triggerman.

She recalled that cold winter night, her coat fluttering in the wind as both she and Kolia faced each other. As Alexis explained what she was about to do, he didn't try to run away or beg for mercy. He just accepted his fate. She had even offered him a fair chance to fight back, but he had turned it down.

The only thing he had asked for was that she would keep her smile.

But, now everything was different, twice she has shown her real emotions, and twice her "happy face" has cracked. Firing another shot at a target, Alexis bit her lower lip as she popped out another shell. This was not sitting well with her, and now she just wished this job would end faster so that she could follow Kozlov's advice and leave the city, as it was becoming abundantly clear that she wasn't going to find her death here. As she was about to fire again, her phone beeped. Pulling it out, she saw it was a message from Christopher.

"Hey there, got the snacks and movies ready. When will you be over?" The text asked.

Staring down at the screen, Alexis sighed and began to disassemble her weapon, not bothering to text him back. Putting the rifle back into her suitcase, she then began to drive away while thinking of the caracal. What was she going to do with him? She could keep on lying to him and pretend that she was Sally Babou, the innocent lawyer next door, but this didn't feel right. Maybe it would be best if she just left without a word.

You can just kill him… Her inner voice said. Just make it look like an accident or suicide, after that you can just leave

"But what about his family?" Alexis asked herself as she turned the wheel.

What about them? How many of your victims do you think were without family? Why should you treat this guy any differently?

There was truth in those words. She had killed many people, most of whom did have families, so what made the caracal different? It couldn't be because he was a civilian; she had killed those before whenever the occasion had called for it, so why did she feel so reluctant about this?

Snapping out of her thoughts, she saw that she had arrived back to her apartment block. After parking the car and moving inside the building, she took the elevator up to her floor and contemplated on what to do… No, she couldn't just kill the caracal. Instead, she would apologize and say that he was wrong about the idea that she had a "thing" for him, that she shouldn't have encouraged him to think so and that it was all just a mistake. It sounded simple… For crying out loud, she had dodged bullets and sown wounds together on the battlefield, this should be easy!

Hearing the elevator ding, she made her way towards his apartment door. Taking a deep breath, she then knocked on it gently, her ears twitching as it opened with a few clicks. Chris appeared in the doorway, and when he saw who it was, he smiled widely, his eyes practically shining with joy from seeing Alexis, which made the ocelot feel another pang of self-loathing for using this sweet kid.

"Hey there, I was about to text you again," Chris said as he adjusted his glasses. "Sorry if I sound annoying, I just… You know…"

"Hey, it's all хорошо (fine) " Alexis said softly, as she waved it off with her bandaged hand. "Listen, I just wanted to apologize for…."

"What happened to your hand?" He suddenly asked, interrupting her. "Did… Did someone hurt you?"

"Oh, this? Oh, it's nothing important, just got injured at work." Alexis said casually. She noticed though how the caracal's expression changed; looking very upset all of a sudden. "Is something wrong, Christopher?"

"You bet something is wrong. Injured at work? I am no fool, Sally," the caracal said in a tone of voice that actually sounded angry. "I know how that happened, and how you got that head injury from before."

Hearing that, Alexis felt her heart actually stop while her back went cold. How could he know?! She was always so careful to make sure she came off as a normal person, plus if he really knew, did that mean that he would report her to the cops? Maybe he already had…!

You know what you need to do… Her inner voice said again Now you even have a good excuse, so go on, snap his fucking neck…

"Christopher… I … I can explain…" Alexis whispered, trying to compose herself, but once again she was interrupted.

"What is there to explain? I've seen it before: hiding your wounds, disappearing when the phone calls, making up excuses…! The only thing that puzzles me is why you keep going back to that bastard if he does this to you?!" Christopher exclaimed, throwing his hands up in the air.

Blinking, Alexis stared at Chris, dumbfounded. Then she began to realize what he was implying: He actually thought that she was in some abusive relationship, which made her heart calm down somewhat. Exhaling softly, Alexis smiled a little as she was about to explain, but was interrupted once again as Christopher didn't seem like he was about to stop for anything.

"Sally, you don't deserve this abuse! You're a good and sweet girl, I know it's none of my business but…. It's not right to see such a sweet person like you go through something like this." He whispered softly, and then carefully placed his hands on her shoulders. "Please, just let me help you."

Hearing this left the ocelot even more stunned than before. She could tell that me he meant it, every single word. A strange and painful sensation was building up in her chest, as she was simply at a loss of what she should do right now. Her mind was a whirlwind of anger, sorrow, hate, joy and even despair and confusion. Her inner voice echoed saying how she should get out of there or snuff out the caracal, and yet… Something else was building inside her body. Something that felt familiar and yet very alien to her.

"S-Sally?" Christopher whispered looking very worried by how silent the female has fallen, and then looked increasingly puzzled as the ocelot placed her paws on his neck. "Are you ok-Mhhhp?!"

His eyes went as wide as saucers as Alexis pressed her lips against his and closed her eyes. Muffling some more, the caracal's eyes then closed as well, his arms wrapping around the ocelot as the two carefully stepped inside the apartment and the door closed behind them. At that moment, Alexis didn't know what she was doing or even if she was thinking straight, but for this instant, she actually felt alive.