Whooooo-eee; never rains but it pours! Merle-in-his-head hollered, now don't you go all explodin' eyes and vomiting blood on me, son!
Shut-up.
I mean it… I'm only a part of you and so you got two to think on, you hear?
Daryl ignored him; there was only one person he was looking for.
And he found her as Hersel walked past him down the corridor.
So there was a virus in the camp… it was a killer… everyone could get it and everyone could die from it. Seemed like Mother Nature was being a vindictive bitch to them at present.
But there was Carol, stood quiet in the hallway.
He made to walk past her, but as he heard Hershel leave he turned and bit his lip to check they were alone and ask, "Are you alright?"
It was the only thing that mattered.
He tried not to think on why he wanted to hide his concern for her from the others…
She turned to him, grave and tense, "I'm worried about Lizzy and Mika." Her eyes dipped slightly, "They were around Patrick."
Poor kid.
Daryl felt himself nodding and said the obvious, "We all were."
It didn't offer any comfort… so he tried again, "Karen and David are going to be separated… until they feel better…"
"Yeah, right," she dismissed quickly before suddenly startling, "Are you ok?"
Him? Was he ok?
Well… was he?
He supposed he was ok if she was…
Daryl hadn't really thought about it… He shifted uncomfortably and nodded, confirming, "Gotta be."
Macho idiot, Merle chided.
Embarrassed; he turned and moved away.
He supposed that had sounded dumb, but there wasn't an option for being anything other than ok; other than ok was dead.
Best not think on it.
No, but he supposed he had a place to be.
Gotta get the job done…
Everything else could wait 'til he got back.
There would be time.
()()()
It took a while for the words to sink in.
Gone.
Rick just told her she was gone.
Daryl felt his head shake, numb from the neck up and unwilling to process the information.
He had thought when he got back that she would be here waitin' on him with that smile of hers… so when Carol was nowhere to be seen and Rick asked him to come have a word he felt a fierce fear take a hold on his heart.
Then he'd told her she as alive… but in exile.
A sorta desolation replaced the fear.
He looked back to Rick… this man he thought he knew… and there was nothing but that assessing, hard look he sometimes got when he was on alert.
It didn't help; he turned away…
Still nothing… there must be something… some feeling…
Carol had killed Karen and David.
Damn! Merle whistled, Your girl's got stones…
Daryl felt his head shake again; he understood her reason. Prevent spread of disease by eliminating the threat.
She had killed them.
Someone got sense in this outfit, at least.
What was Daryl supposed to do about this?
Do about it?! Merle cried out, true-to-form, Did he mention this to anyone? Did he talk to you about it? I'd punch him right in that pretty-cop-jaw of his!
Daryl felt his anger build, making his breath short as he swung about and exclaimed, "Man, you couldn't have waited until we got back?!"
Rick reacted as though slapped, "Until Tyreese got back?!"
He had a point. The way the guy had beat-on Rick… Carol wouldn't have stood a chance… but still… "I could have handled that…"
There would have been a way.
For Carol, Daryl would have found a way…
"Hey…" Rick called as he paced away from him, "Hey…"
Daryl turned back, blowing frustration through his nose…
"She killed two of our own," Rick explained, curling in on himself, hand-to-heart… he really hadn't thought he had had a choice… "She couldn't be here."
Damn… Officer Friendly needs you more than even he knows, Little Brother.
Daryl watched him… Rick was on the raggedy-edge… But hell… What about Carol?!
"She's going to be alright," Rick continued, almost pleading, "She has a car… supplies… weapons…"
Like that meant a damn…
"She's…" Rick stuttered over the sentence, "she's a survivor…"
Fuck.
"Stop saying that like you don't believe it!" Daryl broke, watching him close and seeing him weaken…
He knew it was wrong… he knew there was next-to no chance…
Damn him.
Daryl turned away this time… trying not to let the dread reduce him to tears…
"She did it," Rick asserted to Daryls back, "She said she did it for us…"
Made sense… Daryl turned to him…
"That's what it was in her head," he shook his head, trying to meet his eyes, "She wasn't sorry."
"Sure, that's her…" she wanted to protect the group. Murder though… "But that aint her…"
She wasn't a murderer… and she wasn't a threat.
He didn't know how he felt about her being sent away like that.
And besides that…
"What are we supposed to do about those two girls?"
Who the hell was going to look after the children now?
Rick just huffed, "I told her we'd look after them."
He couldn't help the hate in his eyes at that moment as he sucked on his teeth and smothered the need to punch Rick right-smack in the jaw, just like Merle had said…
Fuck.
The weight of it was starting to weigh on him and he folded on the prison rail…
World has gone to hell… Merle sounded, You've survived it before. You will again.
Had to breathe.
That's all that that he needed right now.
"I haven't told Tyreese yet…" Rick commented, quietly…
Man, he had to be kidding…
"I don't know how he's going to take it…"
Fuck.
Fine.
Fine…
Daryl took a breath… "Let's go and find out."
He shouldered past Rick, still mad as hell for not getting a chance to say goodbye.
As much as he hated sayin' it – it would have been something…
Then again, would he have said it at all? Was that really what Rick was afraid of?
That Daryl would have left with Carol, given the chance?
Right now, he supposed, it didn't matter. He would never get to make that decision… There was no way to track her without Rick at least hinting as to where they had driven to… And he was not about to ask that man for nothin' right now.
He'd taken the choice away…
And Daryl was never going to forgive that.
()()()
…
…
Fuck.
That was close.
That was fucking close.
In searching for sanctuary after the prisons fall, they had blindly led themselves into a slaughter-house…
Daryl had been on his knees and waiting for the end…
God alone knew how they got out.
Got an angel out there watchin' over y'all… Merle commented. Ain't no other explanation, little brother…
All he knew for the moment was that Rick and the rest of the group had slowed their pace through the forest. And, for now, Daryl rested with the rest of the group in a part of the wood.
How much more could he take of this? They'd lost so much in the last few weeks; Andrea… Hershel… Beth…
Carol…
He felt sick.
Barely a few centimetres from being a rack o' ribs on the bbq… You got lucky somehow…
Rick and the others were trying to get a hold on themselves… on reality…
And Daryl…
He was tired.
Tired in his bones and in his blood.
There was a tree near he could lean on; had about enough of standing…
The others argued and murmured about him…
What was there to say?
What good would come of this?
He'd lost his weapons.
Lost his meaning.
Lost hope.
Did you hear that?
Didn't hear a damn thing…
There's someone…
Go away.
Turn around, dummy! You're being followed.
Almost wishing it was someone with a bullet carved in his name, Daryl turned about…
The world screeched to a halt.
It couldn't be…
No damn way…
It was…
There's your angel, son!
She stood there… dirty… glorious…
And everything fell away.
All noise and thought and sense of where he was and who he was with was forgotten as time slowed and rested in the moment her eyes met his.
She saw him.
He saw her.
And then he was in flight… his heart soared above him as he reached her, arms wide and surrounding her to crush their bodies together and make certain they were both real and together.
The world could have fallen away right there and then and it didn't matter as he felt her face turn into his neck and she gave the smallest laugh…
It was beyond delight and he held her tight, lifting her from the ground and swirling her about to feel her weight and know that meant she was there in his embrace…
He only moved away to look in her eyes again; overwhelmed.
This press of her lips on his forehead was ecstasy and he had to keep his face down so she couldn't see the tears in his eyes.
He could hear her crying… smell her scent… and everything was about her.
There was nothing else.
Except for the sound of someone approaching…
He turned, half-ready to tell whoever it was to go to hell…
But it was Rick.
Shit…
He supposed they had words to say, so moved away but kept within ear-shot to listen to the revelation that Carol had saved them.
There's your angel, Bruh… Merles voice smiled.
Daryl knew it! Knew it was her and he'd see her again.
And when the party finally got back to moving again, he hung back to walk at her side.
They said nothing for the first hour, just glanced at each other before giggling like kids and turning away…
His hand reached out and she accepted, spreading her fingers through his like that had done months before.
Daryls heart picked up a pace.
It was good.
Didn't matter what was gone as long as he had her there beside him; all else fell away.
After a time they noticed nobody had turned to look, so bumped a little closer; shoulder-to-shoulder.
He stifled a smile… adding, "Miss us?"
Carol glanced his way… "Missed you."
He felt the air jerk into his lungs as he tried to control himself and stirred his courage enough to admit, "Missed you too."
And if any of the others noticed his arm weave its way about her shoulders, they never said.
And the way she fit into his side as her arm snaked about his hip.
The road was long, but he seemed light as a feather.
No matter what else; they were together.