Vanellope's Bug Problem
Chapter Nine

"So, why would everyone think you're dead?"

"Because if someone dies outside their game, they don't regenerate."

"How did you make it here, then?"

"Well, I only just made it out of RoadBlasters (the game that stole my thunder) as it was being unplugged along with TurboTime. Because it happened during game hours, everyone else was in their games doing their shticks. But I knew that news would spread quickly of what I'd done, so I hid in any spots I could find, eventually reaching the basement of Fix-It Felix Jr."

"Let me guess. It's a game that's about fixing things?"

"Ding-ding!"

"And the player character is Fix-It Felix Jr.?"

"We have a winner. Yeah, his father was a toolmaker who taught Felix Jr. how to fix things with a magic hammer."

"Ah. So, what all does he fix in his game?"

"He fixes an apartment building that's being wrecked by a guy named Wreck-It Ralph."

"Cool. I'll have to meet them sometime."

"Yeah, I think they'll enjoy meeting you. Although Ralph can be a bit of a handful."

"Well, two can play at that game."

"It's actually a one-player game, so..."

I burst out laughing. "So, what did you do in there?"

"I found their code vault and was able to get a look at how the game's data was laid out. Through experimentation, I was able to implant myself into that game as Fix-It Felix Sr."

"Seems kinda dangerous, don't you think? Messing with a game's code like that?"

"I learned my lesson well from RoadBlasters. The goal of acquiring those skills was to ensure that if a game became the most popular in the arcade (and I do hope yours is able to have that honor someday), that the player characters would have someone other than the players to look to for their attention, and hopefully prevent them from being driven to do what I had done."

"How would tapping into a game's code stop a character from going Turbo? If I didn't know better, I'd think you're trying to break this game like you did RoadBlasters."

"What would I have to gain from doing that? I don't have my own game anymore, so destroying your game would not benefit me in the slightest in any way, shape, or form."

"So, what exactly is your plan?"

"You see, the only sentient characters in my game were my rival racers, Jet and Set, and our relationship was... less than cordial. So, the only ones to whom I could express my gratitude were the people who played my game. Without their input, I felt like my life had no purpose. My plan here is to have someone that can grant you comparable levels of attention inside the game as players would give you from outside the game."

"And what do you have in mind?"

"Well, the reason I asked about your backstory was so that I'd have someone I could model myself after so that you could revel in doing what you do best without needing to rely on the attention of gamers. That way, it won't be such a crushing blow if your game stops being popular. (Not that I'd wish for any game to lose popularity.) I mean, if you'd rather we built a life-size statue of the subject of your backstory, I can settle for that."

I couldn't help but laugh. "Yeah, celebrating victories in front of a statue of a nonexistent character. That would totally make me look sane."

"It would probably be healthier, then, if I reprogrammed myself as some sort of father figure to you, is that it?"

I laughed harder. "I'd still know it was you if you did that."

"Doesn't mean I can't at least try."

"Right. How could you possibly expect to mimic my father?"

"Well, I'd hazard to guess that your father was a king?"

"I wouldn't be a princess if he wasn't, now would I?"

"What was his name? King Candy?"

"What gives you that idea?"

"The board game CandyLand; the ruler's name is King Candy."

"Ah. Yeah, my father's name is King Candy."

"Are you game for a little arts and crafts project?"

"What kind of project?"

"Making a life-sized statue of King Candy to get an idea of what I should aim for if I was to take up a role as him in this game."

"I guess." I retied Turbo's wrist to mine. "I know just the place to find supplies."

He flashed a smile and a thumbs-up. "TURBO-TASTIC!"

"Just try to be a little quieter while you're inside, okay, Turbo?"

"Right. My apologies."