As I made this chapter I just realized how I need a doctor badly to check up on me.
I made this chapter with empty mind and lingering dark clouds, this put salt in the sugar of comedy.
Also, those mangas last chapter that I mentioned to you readers, it came from my nerd friend Traks. I'm busy over such things and yet I still read it.
After reading it, I just realized how pathetic close-romance in those manga, whereas this generation is doing everything for their love ones. Meanwhile those stories are able to interact with each other in inhumanely possible. I envy such story.
Enjoy chapter two.
Chapter Two
Stupid, Baka!
So far so good. I'm living in my dungeon alone without luxury or anything intimidating. Hm, it's actually a sore sight for me to see what boss monsters like me put in their final dungeon. I've seen enough and making descriptions of it are boring the author to no end.
An Ancient Dragons like me are mobs or creatures that survived through harsh calamities and came out unscathed against the nature we lived it. We are naturally strong and we are the superior beings that no humans may dare face us alone and live to tell the tale. Human race are popular and they are such a disgrace to destroy the nature that once they treat like a taken for granted.
How troublesome humans truly are!
And they have the guts to get at us! Us, creatures who lived in nature, nurtured our lives by living the same as before without any problem until pathetic living human killed some of our kind without remorse and gained 'level', 'exps', 'gold' or whatever nonsense they're ranting about.
...
I'm actually furious against humanity!
But I can't believe to myself that I can't even lift a finger from this brat sleeping on my head, specifically on my hair! My holy hair that I taken care of for so many years only to be ruined by a human. A mere brat of all choices that I need to pick, when did I even thought of picking anyway?!
Sadly, I could only wait for this brat to wake up. I've been seating in my chair for 21 seconds now after she fell asleep, or that was the time I'm assuming.
(In fact, dragon's assume of time of the 'hours' are 'seconds')
Hmm, now that I think about time, it's been a long time... get it? Oh, I'm sorry, my jokes are that bad? Anyway, I noticed I have a plant on in my pot filled with soil. Oh, I see...
...hmmmm, there's 'planty' of them outside my dungeon.
(Story of the year, *clap clap*)
So far so good I need to give my description about the place where I'm at. Just wait a sec... Aha! I have what I needed.
So let's see, I'm in the middle of the room, me seating on the stone chair, while this brat sleeping on my hair. There's a pot of plant beside the doorless entrance in front of me. This is actually the entrance of my dungeon, I've been here for a while, let's head to my the 'door' of my home.
But I remembered this brat on my head as I huffed out in annoyance. I usually don't get angry over such things and whenever monsters, especially humans like this brat came here, only one thing that I always do.
Kick them in the butt and let them soar through the air with fire burning up their bum like rockets.
Now now, I missed the battle but I'm an old Ancient Dragon that still claims to be the strongest. I don't want to brag about it but I wanted to keep that title until I find my successor who would be willing enough to train to their spine to be as strong as me or even surpassed me.
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Is this brat doing this on purpose of sleeping in my head the entire day?
I'm hungry already and I have a packed of delicious Horsebirds that I need to cook already. I would have moved but not without waking her up. I've read a book before regarding of how humans woke up made by some author named... Forget it the name, I mean, who name himself or herself "Innocent Devil"?
Bah I don't care, the reason is that if I made a move now, this brat will start to wake up and started to cry waterfall which it had two reasons. Mainly is that she's on my hair, which I don't like it to be wet, not some bitter tears. Two is that I've had enough about noises already.
So, against the dignity of a dragon to eat, I sold it for a few more seconds to wait 'til this little girl wakes up.
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3 seconds passed...
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Oh, and by the way readers, do you know 'fourth wall'? I've heard a certain human complaining about those and that human called 'fourth' her anger. Get it? Hahaha... right, I'm sorry...
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5 seconds passed...
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Hmm, I just remembered as time passes by, I accidentally encountered a human after buying groceries from the nearby monster mall. You know me, I'm big and the human was s'mall', right? Am I right or amirite (meteorite)?
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7 seconds passed...
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Damn, I needed to scratch my spine sometimes and polish my horns sometimes. My back getting itchy, my horns getting rusty. I need a blade to polish my horns and reach my back for me to scratch the itchy feeling.
It's surprisingly, not annoying. More like, I just wanted to get rid of this itch.
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9 seconds passed...
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"Mr. Dragon, I'm hungry..."
Damn right my poor stomach! Don't worry, I will cook right away! I quickly stood up and storm inside my dungeon acting like a crazy madman after having an experiment in my head.
Not even after five minutes I'd arrived at a neat room made up of stone with furniture like a kitchen. A furnace, a counter made up of stone, a sink-like with a faucet-like waterfall and plenty of stuff you can see in middle age form but technically came from modernization. Hm, I have a fridge, I didn't notice that before.
"That was fun! Yipee! Fly more fly more Mr. Dragon."
I'm sorry stomach but running like a speed of jet in its full fuel and speed was tiring me to the dark spine! I needed to regain my utmost energy by cooking the stockpile of Horsebirds there in the counter, fly later, eat now for earlier energy regainer! There's no more room for hesitation as hunger covered my sense and wore...
...a blue apron with a claw of the dragon and a white chef hat. I looked around to see if there's any monsters nearby, wearing this kind of cloth was a troublesome for my reputation as an Ancient Dragon.
An Ancient Dragon stood over its prey and mauled over it and sate has yet to be fulfilling but since I'm a retired Ancient Dragon there will be no problem for me to be like a ravage beast like before. I'm happy to cook food than eat raw meat which I realized tasted awfully, not nice. But maybe my taste changes when I get old. That maybe the case.
I placed the first stock of Horsebirds (Oh, I forgot to tell, the stockpile of Horsebirds are all but alive) in the bowl. I then looked around to see a stockpile of lumbers that I cut down underneath the sink. I grabbed a handful of those and placed it in the burnt area. Then I blew a breath of fire to it as it instantly flared and crackled in burning sensation. Nodding in satisfaction as the light coming from the fire reflected back to me, I placed the bowl filled with Horsebirds over the burning lumbers to cook it.
I should add some spice. Just thinking about it makes my mouth drool at how delicious this will be!
"Mr. Dragon! Stop ignoring me! Hmm!"
Did I just hear a voice? Or maybe it's my stomach. I scratched my chin while looking around in frantic. Could it be that I have a hardcore fan that is spying me using the bug's eyes?! This is gonna be a hefty problem for me if some of my kind saw me in this outfit. I cannot let them see my like this.
I scratched my head, specifically my hair in annoyance as I looked around.
"Ow! Ow! Mr. Dragon!"
Hm? I felt something on my hair as I plucked it. I pulled it out my hair and put it in front of me. I saw the same brat who's cheeks are red and puffed. Her blonde hair was messy and all over the place like a hedgehog. Her big blue eyes were glaring at me.
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Oh no.
"Mr. Dragon! You're so mean! You're so meeeeeean!"
WHEN did this brat get in my hair?! Of all damn places?!
She was trashing around like a hanging bell that always chimes (that was her whines) by the wind. I held her in the air as I hold her by her dress using my nails.
"You're so mean! I'm calling you over and over but you're ignoring me! Stupid! Baka!"
Just what did I get to deserve this!
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Oh, isn't 'to' is 2?
...feel free to say what's your thoughts about this dragon... puns...
*groans in the distance*