The heavy crystal glass dangled haphazardly from her fingertips as she idly rocked it back and forth, watching the honey brown liquid slosh around the bottom. Regina sat slouched in the leather chair of her study, hand and glass hanging over the armrest. She could just let go of the tumbler to crash onto the mahogany floor and it would shatter into little jagged pieces and no one would care, least of all her. Her mood had only sunk further in the last couple of days.
She'd woken up the morning after her curse broke still curled up in Henry's bed with salt tracks on her cheeks. Her body automatically started getting ready for the day out of habit; brushing her teeth, showering, styling her hair and putting on a clean white button down. But that was as far as she had gotten until Regina realized she had nowhere to go except to wander the empty rooms of the mansion. Giving up on pretense, she ignored the pencil skirt she selected and slid on silky night shorts, which was how she remained, wallowing and waiting.
Regina expected Emma would have shown up at some point that next day with fresh clothes and maybe a fresh attitude but as the day inched onward and shadows crawled across the rooms creating the night the blonde never came. Today had been much the same as she felt each minute of solitude seep into her. Eventually she abandoned another depressing meal of toast and orange juice and retired to her office for a dinner of whiskey, the alcohol moving sluggishly through her veins and dimmed the ache.
Then through the dark, she heard a soft rapping from the front door. Her heart leapt to her throat, adrenaline flooded her and burned up the effects of the drinks she had. Her magic was still temperamental but it crackled unseen over her skin like a livewire. Then the person let herself in, a recognizable gait of riding boots sounding across the foyer relaxed her nerves and her body remembered assassins and rabid mobs didn't politely knock before entering. After a moment Emma appeared in the doorway, her blonde hair shone in the navy din, her slender frame familiar and concrete. Regina remained unmoved, not bothering to correct her unladylike posture and when she greeted the other woman her voice came out like dry ice. "So nice of you to grace us with your presence Ms. Swan."
Emma flicked up the light switch and her desk lamp popped on, illuminating the room half-heartedly. Regina glowered at the light and the woman but the sheriff remained undaunted as she sarcastically said, "I'm sorry if I've inconvenienced you but I have a lot going on, including dealing with dragon clean up and disappointing my long lost parents. So you'll have to excuse me your majesty."
Regina eyes adjusted to the light and she found Emma looking tired and withdrawn, features that most likely reflected her own. She walked in heading for the decanter of liquor and helping herself to a glass, whiskey splashed cheerfully into the bottom. As she did Regina couldn't repress her sneer, "What? Snow White is not-so-happy in the happily ever after?"
She looked sharply up at Regina, "Don't start. I'm not here to talk about my parents."
The brunette considered goading her further but remained mute, taking a bite of her own whiskey. Emma dropped herself onto the far end of the couch and drank a few swallows, her gaze wandered around the room. "Why are we always in here?"
Regina shrugged, "Would you like to go somewhere else?"
"No. No just an observation." Emma said lamely and Regina nodded. Much of whatever relationship was at this point they started in her study, beginning with their first shared drink when Emma returned Henry, then their first civil conversation, the first time they slept together, their first kiss and now. The walls lined with books had seen it all.
"So what will it be? Exile or a good old-fashioned beheading?" Regain asked about her fate.
Emma ignored her dark humor, "We won't know until after the tribunal with the high council."
"Hm." Regina made a noise of surprise. She thought they would have skipped over what was sure to be a sham of a trial all together; she figured it was just a matter of time.
The women lapsed into silence. Regina found herself releasing some of the tension and despair that had accumulated over her hours of isolation, letting Emma's presence be a comfort while she still could. Suddenly I thought occurred to her and she cringed all over again. "You should know, in the mental ward, some one needs to go-"
"I know." Emma interjected; her tone was dull and brooding. "Everyone is out. They're fine."
"Oh." Regina wanted to inquire about the specifics but Emma's demeanor stopped her. After another pause the other woman began speaking stiffly her voice rising a little with incredulous anger.
"Graham has been helping me at the Sheriff's station… Jesus Regina I thought he was dead. Do you how fucked up that is? He just showed up at the diner."
"I'm sorry. I don't have an excuse for you. I should have been the one to tell you- I'm just sorry for hurting you." Regina rubbed her temple, an ache blossoming there. In casting the curse she had hurt the people she care for most, but without casting the curse she would never have met them. Fate had a cruel sense of humor.
Emma leaned forward, resting her elbows on her knees, "So what, was this your plan all along?"
Regina blinked. "What do you mean?"
"Having me fall in love with you. Was it your plan the whole time? You seduced Snow White's daughter as some twisted revenge and I'm just the naïve fool who falls for it?" Bitterness tainted her voice.
"No. No Emma, that was never the plan." Regina sighed, sitting up straighter. "The one thing I never could have planned for was you."
The blonde pause, her eyes searching Regina for answers, "Why did you do it? Cast the curse?"
"I'm the Evil Queen." She answered mockingly blithe.
"No, that's not why. I don't believe in all this 'you're evil' bullshit."
"Well you'd be wrong." Regina said darkly.
"I'm not." Emma said combatively. "Because I look at Henry and how good he is and I see you. His intelligence, passion, and how much he cares about other people and you raised him to be like that."
"You think I care about other people?"
"Admittedly, not a lot of other people." Emma scraped her nail around the rim of her cup, "I thought you cared about me."
Almost unbidden, Regina rasped, "I do."
She no longer had any reason to hide her true feelings. All of her emotions lapped on the surface, like a never-ending high tide sending wave after wave that she simply couldn't fight anymore. Emma scoffed. "You have a funny way of showing it. Trying to poison apple turnovers. I was headed out of town Regina. Why couldn't you just leave it?"
"I knew I should have let you go, but I couldn't stand the idea of you leaving. I just wanted you here in whatever capacity… I'm sorry."
"Seriously?" Emma barked a short, humorless laugh. "And I thought I needed to work on my communication skills… So why didn't you let me eat it?"
Regina drained her drink. "As much as I wanted to win… You were right that morning when you said that we were connecting. I guess I really do like you Ms. Swan."
"And all this True Love business. We just happened to be fated to be together?" Regina noted the slight tone of distain.
"Sorry you're stuck with me." She sarcastically toasted her empty glass to the sheriff.
"It's not that." Emma fidgeted. "I don't like the idea of this predetermined destiny. I mean, what are the odds; the Evil Queen and Snow White's daughter."
"There shouldn't have been any odds. It should be an impossibility." She conceded.
"How do you mean?"
Regina stood wearily and retrieved the fine crystal bottle, poured another dash of alcohol, and drawled out. "That is a long story."
"I'd like to hear it." Emma prompted as the older woman drew near to her to top off her glass.
"Well I suppose I should start at the beginning." Regina lowered herself onto the couch at the opposite end. The blonde shifted to face her, waiting uncomplainingly as Regina arranged the thoughts in her head. Eventually she took a deep breath and started her story.
It spilled out of her easily as she spoke of her cruel and demanding mother and her devoted but meek father who did nothing to reign in the torment through her childhood. Her mother used to shackle her with magic, leaving her suspended for days something until she promised to be a good girl. She had been terrified sometime growing up in a household with the threat of magic. Then she spoke of her first love affair with Daniel, the sweet young man who touched her life with goodness for a too-brief moment. Regina bitterly recounted her meeting with a child called Snow White and how it lead to her beloved's death at the vicious hands of her mother and her entrapment in a marriage with the much older king. She told Emma how miserable the marriage had been as she was forced to play the kindly mother to her stepdaughter and dutiful wife to her husband who grew more jealous and possessive of his beautiful young bride. She'd tried to escape the unhappiness with an apprenticeship with Rumplestiltskin, a demeaning and manipulative mentor, but the thrill of magic was too strong to resist. Still, in a particularly hopeless moment, she remembered standing in the highest room at the tallest tower in the lonely castle and wanting to end it all. Suddenly she had been plummeting through the sky and after the sickening jolt of panic an eerie calm came over her as she relaxed into the free fall.
"I was saved though by the Green Fairy. She happened to be flying by and caught me."
"Did you mean to do it?" Emma interrupted for the first time, her eyes glassy and mournful. "Did you mean to jump?"
"At the time, I said it was an accident, that I would never… But now, I can't say for sure. What started as an accident may have been a relief."
"I'm sorry that it came to that… I'm glad you're here now though." Emma said, honest and quiet.
Regina's heart fluttered, "Me too. It… may be wrong to say but I'm glad I didn't miss any of this."
The moment spiraled around them, summoning the memory of their first kiss, the influx in ions like an incoming storm brewed between them. Regina watched Emma's chest rise and fall beneath the green flannel of her shirt. The blonde spoke thickly, "What happened after the fairy saved you?"
"I guess she saw I needed help. She offered to help me find my True Love."
"How?"
"Pixie dust. Fairies and dwarves would mine this magically dust capable of all sorts of magic, including revealing one's True Love. She used it and we followed a trail to a tavern in the woods. He was there, my supposed True Love. So unless you were some broad shouldered bandit in the Enchanted Forest it very much wasn't you."
"Did you meet him?"
"No, I- I ran away. I was married to the king and I was still afraid of my mother. And I wasn't ready to let go of Daniel… I couldn't accept that someone else was out there for me. That was the night I truly devoted myself to learning the dark magic."
"Is he here? In town?"
"No, the part of the forest he lived wasn't in the boundaries of the Enchanted Forest. When I cast the curse, I made sure to leave Sherwood Forest behind. An insurance measure that I couldn't break the curse with True Love's kiss."
"So how did we then? Could the fairy's dust have been wrong?" Emma asked confused.
"I don't know. I'm not well versed in the magic of true love. The Blue Fairy might know something."
"God, does it even matter?" Emma ran an agitated hand through her hair. She looked at Regina fiercely, "What matters is what we decide to do. I don't give a shit about magically dust or fairies. What do you want?"
"What do I want?" Regina echoed. "I'm a prisoner in my own home. I don't think I have much say in any matter at the moment."
"Forget about all of that." She demanded. "I'm so tired of the fighting. And I'm still hurt and angry and we would have to work through that… But you- we've had enough unhappiness for several lifetimes. Don't you think we deserve this chance?"
Regina couldn't register Emma's choppy speech for a moment. It had never occurred to her that at the end of this the younger woman would be there, practically asking her to choose this thing, this relationship that had sometimes been ugly and hard but then also so beautiful and tender, that they shared. Her expectation had been another fracture in her heart but instead she found it brimming with the possibilities of love. She choked out, "I should let you go… But I can't. I won't deny it. I want this. I want you Emma."
"Good." Her short response was quickly followed with Emma discarding her glass on the coffee table, the cylinder wobbled precariously in her haste as she closed the distance between them. The tumbler in Regina's own hand flew out of it, sailing over the rug and hitting the hardwood with a crash like a triumphant cymbal just as Emma's pressed their lips together. Regina hummed into the kiss, the same intense warmth she felt at their first kiss sparked and blazed with pleasure. Emma lashed her tongue out at her plump lower lip, her hand finding Regina's hip to tug her closer.
The brunette pressed her body into the other woman's the best she could from their seated arrangement, opening her mouth to take Emma inside her, sucking lighting on her tongue and making the woman groan deeply. Regina snaked her hand up Emma's torso, her fingers clutched at the collar of her shirt and yanked. They grabbed at each other with the desperation of desire; eventually ardent hands and pulling grasps caused them to topple off the couch, shoving the coffee table out of the way on their descent, and landed on the carpet below. Emma let out a small 'oof' as Regina landed on top of her but otherwise the women seamlessly adjusted to the new situation, lips never tiring in their heated exploration.
Emma rolled Regina over to switch their position, hovering overtop of her enough to unbutton her blouse. Her cool fingers glided over her abdomen, cupping her breast and scratching at the satiny fabric of her bra. Not to be outdone Regina rapidly undid Emma's shirt, pushing it away from her body to drag her hands down the firm and smooth biceps, appreciating the strength as Emma held herself up. They continued to disrobe each other, like tearing away the wrapping paper from presents, until they were both completely nude. The blonde moved her kisses downward to the thin, delicate skin of her neck and then to her breasts. Her tongue circled lazily around her nipple, and Regina rocked her hips languidly up into Emma's. With the devoted attention to her chest and the feel of Emma's naked form over her, the queen quickly felt the slick heat building between her legs.
The mouth on her breast sucked and flicked faster now and Regina groaned, her hips pushed more insistently upward as the wonderful little sparks teased over her skin. "Oh god, Emma. Please."
The blonde propped herself on one elbow, her right hand moved purposed to the crux between her legs, her fingers immediately skating through her arousal. Emma found Regina's lips once again, murmured reverently against them, "Jesus, you're so wet."
The words sent shivers throughout her body. "Please Emma. I need you inside me."
Emma moaned and pushed her tongue into Regina's mouth as two fingers did the same to her wanton sex. The brunette clutched at the shoulders above her and Emma thrust inside of her at a deliberate pace. Regina pressed her thigh upward between the younger woman's legs, her hands slid to grab her ass to hopefully help alleviate the pressure building there. Emma immediately began to grind herself against the toned flesh. They moved faster against each other, sweat began coating their skin with the effort. Emma suddenly curled her tongue against the roof of Regina's mouth and her fingers mimicked the action. Regina gasped as she wrenched her lips away for a moment, "Fuck, oh fuck. Em-ma."
Her walls around Emma's fingers clenched violently, her orgasm spilling over them, their lips bumping into each other in a forgotten kiss. The pleasure burst over her like fireworks flaring blue copper and silver magnesium in her veins as she vaguely felt Emma riding her thigh more purposefully. The other woman's arousal smeared against her as she worked to steal her own orgasm. Emma stiffened against her, moaning the gratification of her release while Regina floated down from her high with a pleasant static feeling encompassing her. Their labored breathing steadied, lips met clumsily against one another's unhurriedly as they came back to the present. Emma extracted herself from Regina as she relaxed, wet fingers brushed against the crest of her pelvis.
With her senses mostly returned, Regina sat up and wrapped her arms around Emma's waist, the blonde shifting to straddle her hips. The brunette kissed the freckles on her collarbone and nuzzled her neck while Emma gently scratched her scalp, holding Regina close but wanting nothing more. They basked in the calm after their flurry of activity. Regina whispered into her skin. "This isn't going to be easy."
"Seemed pretty easy to me." Emma said wryly.
Regina smirked but said, "I'm serious."
"I know." Emma pulled her head back gently so she could look into Regina's eyes, her hand cupped Regina's jaw. "But isn't it worth it to try."
"Yes." She said simply before Emma kissed her again.