A/N: Sorry this was late guys I started a new cleaning gig, my big sister's birthday is coming up and I wanted to update the chapters after more before I published it. Next one will be ready next Tuesday, hope you enjoy them all!

Please review! Reviews are love! And Cookies! And Chocolate-okay I'm done :D

Chapter 17
Confessions

***Third Person's POV***

"Alaric's wife might have been your mother?"

Elena sighed, "It can't be true, right? I mean, the coincidence alone is just crazy. I have the address for her friend Trudie."

"You wanna talk to her?"

She shrugged, "I don't know. I… I-I don't know. If it's true and they are the same person, that means that my birth mother is dead, and I don't know if I could handle that."

She looked at the ground, frustrated, until Stefan replied,

"Elena, did Jenna tell you anything about Alaric's wife? How she died?"

"Just that she was killed and the case was never solved." She noticed him nod slightly to himself, "You knew that already?"

"The night at the school when he attacked me, he told me some things about her death."

"Well-"

"No, no, no-it's not possible. The coincidence is—it's too much." She nodded, he continued, "Now, listen, if you do decide to go talk to Isobel's friend, I'll go with you. Ok?"

"I just don't know what I'm gonna do yet." He gave her a nod in response and she hugged him, looking for some comfort.

After a minute Stefan announced, "I should get going. I gotta go deal with Damon."

"How's he doing?"

"He's dealing, in his," he looked briefly for the word, "own way."

Suddenly the doorbell rang, followed by a small knock at the front door. Elena and Stefan looked at each other a second, then went to get it, she answered the door to reveal Katy.

"Hey."

"Hey, Katy, what are you doing here?"

"Can I hang out here for a little while?"

"Sure." She replied, "What's going on?"

Katy hesitated slightly before answering, "Damon's grief counselors arrived."

Loud music blared throughout the Salvatore residence, as Damon fed on one of the four or five girls he'd brought home to 'party with-most of which were fairly indisposed by that point.

"How do I taste?" asked the girl he was currently feeding on.

He stopped to take a breath and moaned, "Oh, so much better than your friends. But shh…" He started to whisper, "Don't tell them, they might get jealous."

Just then Stefan walked in, unamused as usual, coming towards Damon.

"No, Buzzkill Bob." He groaned, "Greetings."

"Can we talk?"

"Yeah!"

He briefly scanned the room, "Without the Tri-Delts."

"Anything you have to say to me, you can say in front of them." He smirked, "They're really good at keeping secrets."

Stefan remained unamused; Damon reluctantly walked over to a separate area, leaving his 'guests' to relax.

"You're worried about me. That's nice. Don't be." He said seriously for a second, 'There's no need, I'm fine. Why wouldn't I be? Spent the last 145 years with one goal, get in that tomb. Granted, Katherine wasn't in there to be rescued, no, it's so liberating not to have a master plan because I can do whatever the hell I want."

"That's kind of what I'm afraid of."

"Relax." Damon said, nonchalantly, "I haven't killed anyone in-too long."

Stefan looked into the next room, "Those girls?"

"Will end up in their dorm-with headaches, think they blacked out. Business as usual." He turned to look at his brother, "Predictable you didn't pull me over here for a pep talk. So drink up, spill it brother. Come to try and convince me to dump the resident twelve year old again?"

"You haven't thought about it?"

Damon only shrugged in response.

"There was a woman you may have know a few years back, named Isobel in North Carolina at Duke."

"You wanna discuss the women in my past right now? Seriously?"

"You killed her."

"What's your point?"

"I just- I just wanna know if you remember anything about her."

"Oh it's like a needle in a haystack, Stefan."

"Well think hard." He replied, "It's important."

Damon took Stefan by the shoulders and whispered in his ear, "Nothing is important. Not anymore."

He started walking away, "Great chat. I have to go and exploit some women in the name of grief, which I'm sure you understand. 'TTFN' said the Tri-Delt. Heh.

***Katy's POV***

"So Katy, how are you?" Elena asked, pouring herself some coffee.

"Fine." I took a bite of my cookie the asked nervously, "How's Bonnie?"

She sighed, "I don't know, I called but she didn't answer."

I nodded, looking into my glass of milk absentmindedly; Elena seemed to notice something was off and asked,

"Katy are you okay?"

"Huh?"

"You look stressed, what's wrong?" she pressed.

"Nothing, just funerals-bad blood, you know?" then took a long sip of my milk.

"Katy…" she said sternly; when I tried to take another sip, she practically ripped the glass from my hand, "What's wrong?"

"You're about to lose a finger from taking food away from me?"

"You're dodging. Katy tell me now, or I'm calling Damon."

"You think he could do anything now of all times?"

"Does something have to be done?"

I didn't want to tell her-well, actually I did, and it was driving me mad. All I wanted was to rant and rave, because it was eating me up inside, I could barely take it. Maybe it was because I'd been so comfortable with the half-truths I told Joelle, or maybe I was just that pathetic.

I was doing my best to calm down and retain my stone faced sarcasm, and it appeared to be working until I realized I'd been crushing my cookie to crumbs.

I looked down at the crumbs on the table, then back up at Elena who was giving me a look. After this there was no way I could convince her of anything but negatives.

I felt my chest and shoulders tense as I went to speak, "I-kn-knew."

She looked confused, "Knew what?"

"About Katherine. Pretty much since I got here."

Her eyes widened, and it took her a minute to understand.

"I ran into her, thought she was you until Lexi filled me in-she made me promise not to tell. She said Stefan and Damon were crazy when it came to her. I didn't know what to do-"

"You needed to tell us katy; after all this to get her out or keep her in this could've been avoided!"

"I know-"

"Katy Bonnie's grandmother-"

"I KNOW!" I screamed.

Elena stopped and looked at me, somewhat shocked, and waited for me to continue.

"I know…" I said, my voice angry but quiet, "I didn't think that could happen, I didn't understand that it took so much energy to do that. I thought it was opening a door, and even if Sheila was out of practice Bonnie was younger, I didn't think it was anything more."

I took a moment to breath, "And then I realized, not even afterwards, I figured it out during-but I was-AM! Too chicken shit to do anything even for others! And it makes me sick, thinking about how I did that to a person. I'm a coward! I prayed every night it wasn't true, that it would stop, but nothing! I am a good-for-nothing! I hurt people! I hurt Sheila, and Bonnie, and you, and my parents, and Damon, and God knows how many others!"

By now I'm crying, and I'm gripping the side of my hair in anger.

"I didn't want to hurt him." I whimpered, tears streaming down my red face, "I didn't want to hurt anyone! I knew what was right and I screwed it up anyway! And now, people are dying! People are dying because of me! AND I HATE IT! I HATE MYSELF! I HATE THE COWARD I AM! I HATE THAT I KILLED PEOPLE! THEY AREN'T JUST DYING ON ME! I KILLED THEM! I KILLED THEM!..."

I can't talk anymore; all I can and want to do is cry. So I curled my arms around my head-which I sat on the table, and I just let it all out. Not bothering to look at Elena by now.

Then shockingly enough, after a minute or two, I felt arms wrap around mine-holding me in a comforting embrace, and one hand gently brushed the top of my hair soothingly.

The surprise I felt wasn't enough to pull me out of my fit, so Elena just kept holding me and murmuring things like, "Shh, it's okay… It's alright… You're okay… Let it out…" and so on.

Despite the fact all those were far from reality, they were soothing, and even managed to calm me down some.

"Katy, I'm so sorry, what you're going through is-awful. It's rough, and it hurts." She said, "I lost my parents too. I was with them in the car when they crashed into the lake. I didn't know until recently, but, Stefan saved me. But he couldn't save them… I couldn't save them."

I sniffled, changing my position so I was hugging her back.

"Katy, you are not a coward. You are one of the bravest kids I have ever met, probably the bravest!" she exclaimed, "You're just scared… And I don't think you're used to that. But it happens to everyone, no matter who we are. And you need to accept that."

"But I killed Bonnie's grandmother-"

"No, you didn't." she said sternly, "You should've told us, there's no question about that. But you did not kill her. Get that out of your mind."

"I don't wanna hurt people anymore…"

"I know. You need some help Katy; you can't always rely on yourself. But you need to learn to face your mistakes. You need to tell Damon what you told me-" I tried to protest but she went on quickly, "You've got to tell him, you need to heal, and you need to ask for forgiveness if necessary."

I knew she was right, reluctant as I was, I knew I would never have any peace if I didn't confess.

So, with some encouragement and another cookie, I agreed to tell Damon tonight at the bachelor auction.

And I'm willing to admit, I was absolutely horrified and shaking with fear at the thought.

***At The Grill***

Elena dropped me off at the Grill, and while I waited for Damon and Stefan to arrive, I dreaded the next few hours and what I need to do when they arrived.

In the meantime, I texted Nate, and once again we had a fun conversation-in which we stated throwing around random witty phrases we'd heard.

You must have been born on a highway, cause that's where most accidents happen. I texted.

I once thought the brain was the most important organ, but then I realized who was telling me. He replied.

If you were twice as smart, you'd still be stupid.

If I agreed with you we'd both be wrong.

I'm trying to see things from your point of view, but I can't get my head that far up my ass.

You're so ugly Hello Kitty said goodbye to you.

"Hey Katy!"

I looked up to see Elena sitting down beside me at the table, looking slightly frazzled.

"Hey." I greeted turning off the phone.

"Is that Stefan's phone?"

"yeah I don't have my own so I took it to text my friend Nate."

"Ooh Nate, do you like him?" she smiled.

"I gave her a half smile and said, "Yeah kinda."

"Ohh," she said in a velley-girl voice, then laughed, "Where'd you meet him?"

"Decade dance, he's a freshmen."

"Really?" she askd, surprised, "Kinda old for you isn't he?"

I gave her a look, "Do you wanna go there?"

"You're right." She laughed, them looked to see the blond pair from the cemetery, "Hey come on! You should meet Caroline and Matt, officially."

I groaned, 'No! People!"

"Come on!"

So she introduced us; Matt was pretty awkward, and Caroline was hyperactive but she seemed alright. But they did tend to forget I was standing right there a lot, I guess close friends get caught up sometimes.

"He's already been hit on, like, 35 times. He's total cougar bait." Caroline announced.

"Impressive."

"More like embarrassing." Matt smiled.

Yeah sure, I thought.

"Hi, Mrs. Donovan!" Caroline greeted happily.

The woman who arrived was bout in her mid-forties (though she dressed younger), curled brown hair, and dramatic make-up. She barely glanced at Caroline before she turned to Elena with a smile.

"Elena, honey!"

She smiled back and hugged her, "Hi Kelly."

"Long time, no see."

"How are you doing?"

"Oh, same old. Oh. Matty tells me you broke his heart."

"Mom!"

"Just kidding. Calm down." She turned back to Elena, "He found his rebound girl."

She gave a nod to Caroline and the first thing that entered my mind was,

Imma punch this bitch!

To weakly satisfy that urge I glared intently at her, she either ignored me or was air-headed enough not to notice. She finally looked at Care for longer than a second, handing her some money.

"Oh. Here you go, sweetheart. However many that'll buy. I just hope I don't get bachelor 3. Dated him in high school. Not impressive. In any way." We all laughed a little except for Matt; Kelly got her tickets and smiled briefly at me saying, "Very exciting!"

Then she left, unfortunately with her nose intact.

Elena gave Caroline a sympathetic look, and I did the same, she only looked intently at the cashbox and tickets. I felt truly bad for her, I mean, I may be a bitch but at least I have a reason.

Then I saw Damon talking-well, flirting more like-with Mrs. Lockwood, I gulped and nervously walked towards them.

Good, he's got a drink in his hand… Wait no, that can't be good-I hope he passes out before I reach them!

Just then he left Mrs. Lockwood to speak with the Sheriff.

Okay, I'll take what I can get.

But as I turned to leave Mrs. Lockwood called me over, I only stood in place as she came over.

"Katy," she smiled, "So nice to see you. Are you enjoying your stay with the Salvatores?"

"Tolerably."

Her smile faded, "Just tolerably?"

"What else do you expect?"

"Well, I don't know-I just thought you two would be so attached by now, probably tell each other everything-"

"Ladies." Damon greeted, appearing suddenly.

"Damon." She said, her smile instantly back, "Are you ready now? We're starting soon."

"Absolutely. Hey, I think this glass needs refreshing, would you mind terribly if-"

"No, of course not." She replied grabbing the glass, smiling now as if she's just met the king (whether that king was Elvis or a monarch was never determined), "I'll be right back."

I gave an impressed look and smiled slightly, "Thanks. Who knew it was so easy to make the queen of Mystic Falls act as a barmaid."

"Well in my experience, barmaids are much more promiscuous." He smirked.

"Well, the night is young, and she's only two drinks in."

He smiled and side-hugged my head, "That's my girl!"

Okay Me: 0 Guilt: 1,702… And a half.

"Damon, I need to talk to you." I rushed.

He doesn't have a drink in his hand, I'm not getting out alive.

"Everyone wants to talk!" He groaned.

Last words; 'Live from New York it's Saturday Night!' no, no too long. 'In Omnia Paratus!' no too obscure-No! Focus!

"I knew Katherine was out before we opened the tomb." I said quickly.

He was stunned to silence, his vague amusement gone, and he did not move.

"I met her about two days or so after I arrived. I didn't know at first, but then I ran into her again, by then informed of who she was and her-significance to you. I made a promise not to tell, and I didn't know how much trouble keeping the secret would cause. And I was scared to tell you, because you've become a great friend to me. And I'm sorry, you have no idea how much I wish I could take it all back." I paused, "I'm sorry."

He kept silent, so quiet and still it was eerie, I wanted to run and hide. Better yet I wanted to cry and pray.

He took a step forward, and I tensed, so much my jaw ached. It took all my energy to keep a whimper from escaping.

But all he did was walk passed me and leave me by myself.

Is it possible to feel worse than right now?

The auction went on I felt like crap since Damon hadn't spoken or acknowledged me since I told him. I didn't blame him, but I felt like I wanted to die. Even Jenna noticed and managed to make me admit I felt awful, though she wouldn't know why.

Afterwards I barely listened to the rest of the auction-but I heard Damon's inappropriate statements about Alaric's wife, and spent the rest of my time helping Caroline. She was a lot more agreeable then I would've thought, and I never would have guessed we'd become friends like we had.

My faith in karma had also been restored when I heard Kelly got bachelor 3. Of course it backfired since she had to come over to use, for some cracked reason Caroline was still being nice to her.

"Congratulations Mrs. Donovan." She smiled.

Kelly practically rolled her eyes, "Ok, just stop. Stop trying so hard. This thing you're doing, this nice thing, it's fake, like you, like your mom, and for some reason Matt feel for it but that doesn't mean I will. I don't like you, ok? So tell plumber boy I'll be at the bar. Ok."

Then she left, leaving me with an extending finger and Caroline with a hurt expression.

"Caroline, don't believe a thing that bitch says." I told her, "She's a horrible human being!"

"I'm a fake." She said sadly.

"No!" I looked over to Kelly at the bar, "Look over there."

She reluctantly did so.

"She has had five to six drinks already not including the two shots in front of her, she seems absolutely happy that people hate her, and she's named after a knock-off doll that people thought was cute for about 30 seconds. Do you know what that tells me?"

"No."

I took a breath before explaining, "There are certain people in this universe, most know them as 'douches'. Usually around high school, they think that devil-may-care attitudes, partying too much, and being unnecessarily rude to people they don't wanna bang makes them individual and call. Nothing bad usually hasn't happened to them to make them like that, they just think the more people who hate them the more they really wanna be like them-not true usually, but it helps them sleep at night."

"I think Kelly is just like that only worse now. She probably was how I described, but then life happened, her attitude never got her what she wanted. Now she's just bitter along with all the other stuff, unfortunately, she hasn't given up her attitude. Point is Care, the 'nice thing' is not fake, it's severe restraint."

She smiled a bit "I appreciate the thought Katy, thank you."

Then she hugged me, "No problem, any excuse to ball out a bitch."

I felt her laugh and I laughed along with her, that is until I saw Elena and Stefan rushing back inside grabbing her coat and purse, they looked pretty freaked out. So I pulled out of the hug quickly,

"Uh Care, sorry I need to go, Elena's heading out and she's my ride back home-stay strong!"

"Okay, bye." She barely got out before I sped off.

"Guys what happened?"

"My birth mother, she's-she's a vampire." Elena replied, looking like she was about to cry.

After an explanation, Elena allowed me to stay with her for the night, she said she could use the company and I didn't want to go home tonight.

She was quiet most of the time, generally just staring at the phone she took.

"Elena, call it." I said, "You know you want to."

She sighed, taking a minute before dialing; I listened closely as it rang, waiting for whoever it was to pick up.

"Was there a problem?" The voice asked, "Did you find her? What's going on?"

"Isobel?"