Chapter 11

Summary: A glimpse of the sun

A/N: YO THINGS ARE LOOKING UP! 46 pages later, but we're here!

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

The days passed in a blur of grey moods and utter exhaustion. Nurse Crane and Sister Julienne had managed to organize the rota so that all of the house calls and maternity home shifts were covered, but with Shelagh and Patrick both out of commission and one of the Nonnatuns visiting the London everyday, everyone was pushed to their limits. Word about the Turners had spread quickly, though, and in true Poplar fashion, the community had come together to help in anyway they could. Meals were brought to the convent daily, tutors and nannies volunteered to help with Timothy and Angela, and the locum in Patrick's place proved to be extremely understanding and offered to run additional clinic hours when it became clear they weren't going to be able to see to all of their patients due to the staff shortage. They'd also taken on a new midwife, Valerie, who had graciously accepted the post from Sister Julienne and offered to start immediately. Sister Julienne had offered her a few days to get accustomed, especially since workloads were running high, but Val wouldn't hear of it. She had great respect for Shelagh after the incident at the docks and she was eager to help anyway she could. It was how she'd always been.

Val's addition lifted everyone's spirits. Until the addition of new blood, the Nonnatuns hadn't realized how much the Turners' distress affected their daily lives. Val was a breath of fresh air and brought with her stories from her mum's pub and fond reminiscences of her Poplar childhood. She also proved vital for Timothy and Angela. Unlike all the other midwives, she didn't constantly fuss over them or stare at them for signs of underdeveloped grief. She was a tough kid and she knew what tough kids looked like, so she knew better than to look at them with even an ounce of pity. They latched onto her humorous tenacity immediately. The others suspected Tim had developed a small crush on the new midwife, but they never teased him for it. Any smile was a good smile on a Turner these days.

There were certainly no smiles at the London.

Despite daily visits from friends and family, neither Shelagh nor Patrick seemed to be showing significant signs of improvement. Patrick's vitals remained steady, but the hopes of a quick awakening seemed to be dwindling by the day and the doctor's couldn't explain it. Shelagh, meanwhile, awoke every night in feverish sweats from nightmares about losing various or multiple members of her family and every time a nurse warned her to keep calm, it spiraled her further into panic. Therefore, she woke each day in fear, spent the day wishing she could confide in her husband, and went to sleep terrified to wake up in blood-covered sheets. Her stress levels were astronomical and while she was definitely happier during visiting hours, everyone could tell that separating her from Patrick was taking its toll.

Tim and Angela visited both parents everyday. Angela was always excited to see them, but Tim could tell she was getting more and more distressed when she didn't get to go home to mum and dad. He made sure they saw Patrick first. At least Shelagh was awake to reassure Angela, even if she couldn't tuck her in at night.

Shelagh greeted them with a genuine smile that always put Tim at ease a bit. He'd finally confessed to Val that he felt as though his parents weren't getting better because they'd given up on life without each other and he and Angela weren't enough to motivate them to heal. He knew on some level that it was an insane notion, but he couldn't help it. He felt much better once he'd heard that he and Angela were the first thing Shelagh asked about during the Nonnatuns' visits. Now, even though her face was pale with insomnia and worry, he was able to be comforted by the love in her eyes.

"Mum." Tim sighed happily and walked Angela over to Shelagh's bedside. Angela immediately crawled up into her mother's embrace and Shelagh took Tim's hand with the one that wasn't cradling her youngest. "How's the reading going? I hope you're not too bored."

He'd stopped asking how she was. Anything that made her think of the baby or Patrick made her sad and he didn't want that. Instead, he'd started bringing her books. On a good day, she'd read and they'd talk about the story. On a bad day, she simply stared into space. His own subtle way of checking in on her. Shelagh glanced warily to the bedside table. The most recent addition lay untouched. Tim's spirit sank.

"I may take a look at it later today." Shelagh replied. "It looks wonderful."

"Mummy?" Angela tugged gently at her arm.

"Yes, angel?" Shelagh asked.

"I miss you." Angela lay her head against Shelagh's chest. Shelagh's heart clenched.

"I miss you too, my darling girl. I miss both of you so very much." she said. "Hopefully it won't be long before I can come home."

"Daddy too?" Angela asked hopefully.

"Ange..." Tim warned. He'd tried so hard to explain to Angela time and again that she shouldn't mention Patrick during their visits, but his sister had a will of her own.

"It's alright, Timothy." Shelagh assured, though her eyes were dimmer than before. "One day, daddy too, angel girl."

"Good." Angela decreed. "And baby?"

"Angela!" Tim snapped. It had been a rough morning of Angela being stubborn about absolutely everything and his nerves were already frayed from visiting Patrick. He just wanted his mum to get better and that wasn't going to happen if the one moment of joy in her day was clouded.

"Timothy, please." Shelagh pleaded. "She doesn't know any better."

"But she does, mum." Tim insisted. "I've told her hundreds of times. She's not stupid."

"She's a child." Shelagh said firmly.

"She's making things worse!" he shouted. Angela burst into tears and buried her face into Shelagh. Shelagh simply sighed and waited. Tim, like Patrick, only shouted when he was overwhelmed. The apology would come in 3...2…

"I'm sorry, Ange. Sorry Mum." Tim said sincerely as he sat on the edge of the bed.

"Come here." Shelagh beckoned him closer and he lay beside her and Angela. "I don't tell you both enough how brave you are or how proud I am of you for being so strong." she paused to take in the fleeting sensation of having both of her children so close. "Things will be better than this. I promise you."

"I just want you and dad to get better." Tim whispered.

"I want that too." Shelagh replied. "But I'm afraid that right now, all we can do is wait and pray."

She could hear Tim's hesitation in the silence.

"I can't anymore." he spoke so quietly she almost didn't hear him.

"What can't you do, dearest?" Shelagh asked.

"Sister Julienne tried, but…" he took a breath, "I can't pray. I've tried so hard, but just don't think anyone is listening because...because if they were, then they would make you and dad better. Mummy always loved going to church and I was so angry with dad when he stopped going because mummy and I always went, but...I think I understand why he stopped now."

"Oh, Tim." Shelagh sighed and held him and Angela just a bit closer. She wished so desperately that she could fix all of this. They didn't deserve this. They should all be home and Patrick should be fussing over her pregnancy and Tim should be rolling his eyes. "I know you expect me to tell you to not lose faith and to try harder, but I won't." Tim lay still, listening intently. "I respect your father's faith in science just as much as he respects mine in God. If being married to him has taught me anything about faith, it's that you can't force it. It's understandable that you would be questioning now, and if you come out the other side of this more like your father or more like myself, then I believe that is where he has guided you." She felt Tim nod against her. "Have you spoken with Sister Julienne about this?"

"Not really." he said. "A little, but, I suppose I didn't want to hear her answer."

"I know that feeling well." Shelagh admitted with a small smile.

A gentle throat clearing brought them out of their bubble and all three Turners looked up to see Sister Julienne herself standing before them looking oddly...pleased?

"I'm so sorry to interupt your visit, but I thought you might want a bit of comforting news."

Shelagh sat up so fast, she nearly toppled Angela out of her arms.

"Is Patrick awake?!" She asked frantically. Tim and Angela stared expectantly and suddenly Sister Julienne realized she should have prefaced this more specifically.

"I'm afraid not." Sister Julienne sighed. "But, you'll be able to be there when he is."

"I don't understand." Shelagh said. Sister Julienne grinned.

"It took a bit of work and a bit of truly incredible rescheduling by Nurse Crane, but the staff has agreed to have you moved from the maternity ward into Dr. Turner's room for your time here." Sister Julienne revealed proudly.

"What?" Shelagh asked in disbelief. "But they wouldn't even let me up to see him…"

"They will when they're short staffed and in need of more frequent secondments." Sister Julienne admitted. Shelagh gasped.

"Sister, you can't. We're already inconveniencing everyone at Nonnatus House."

"Your family is not an inconvenience, Shelagh." Sister Julienne spoke resolutely. "You and Dr. Turner have done so much for us and, if you don't mind my saying so, neither of you are particularly skilled at asking for assistance. We want to do this. Additionally...it hasn't escaped our notice that neither of you appear to be healing without the other."

Shelagh blushed, but truthfully, she couldn't deny it. Not being able to check on Patrick was further stressing her and that was no good for the baby. Tim and Angela looked thrilled at the prospect as well.

"Alright." she nodded happily.

Sister Julienne motioned to the ward nurse and the family moved upstairs.

After Shelagh was settled, Sister Julienne knowingly waited for the ward nurse to leave. Not that the nurse really would've minded, given the wink she sent the Sister, but nonetheless, protocol should be attempted. As soon as the nurse was gone, Sister Julienne unhooked the wheels of Shelagh's bed and wheeled her over towards Patrick before locking her in place once more. Tim placed Angela on Patrick's bed and sat beside his mum as she took her husband's hand.

Sister Julienne smiled and left discreetly. What pure science could not heal would be pushed along by love.

YAY! TOGETHER! And even more good things are happening soon, so WOOOOOO. There's still some angst and sadness because like, THE CIRCUMSTANCES, but things are definitely on the upward swing for the Turners. Thank you for reading!