Frustrated with her inability to fall asleep, Elena growls and shifts, her eyes landing on the 04:00 that's illuminated on her alarm clock. Raking her hand through her hair, she knows it's futile to keep trying so she gets up and slips a hoodie over her pajamas. She doesn't want to alarm or wake Enzo so very carefully she tiptoes through the house, slipping on her Birkenstocks as soon as she steps onto the patio. Once her feet touch the sand, she drops her eyes to them and kicks off her slippers. The cool sand sinks between her toes as she walks towards the water. She's always loved the feeling of the sand on her feet.
Upon reaching the water's edge, she drops down and brings her knees up. She wraps her arms around them and drops her chin to her legs. It's still dark but the sky is full of shimmering stars, she easily finds the big dipper. She has such fond memories of her and her dad star gazing with his telescope when she was a little girl. The sounds of the waves lapping on the shore line start to lull her restless mind and yet she still feels unsettled. She knew he wouldn't be happy with her.
She stares at the water, it's glimmering under the light of the full moon, it's beautiful and mysterious. Standing up, she walks closer and gets her feet wet. The conversation with Damon was so much more painful than she could ever have imagined. He's still harboring so much anger and vitriol, not that she blames him really. His preferred method of coping has always been lashing out like an injured animal, wounding her with words.
Those relatively few minutes she spent with him hurt but strangely enough there are no tears left, not anymore, it's like it all happened to someone else, a different person, a different Elena.
Wading through the water, she feels the wet sand squeeze between her toes. She's loves the ocean. It was hard for her to leave the west coast and move to New Orleans, for him though, she gladly made the sacrifice but now...
Pausing she glances towards the sky, a sad smile on her face. The first colors of the sunrise begin to peek, oranges, yellows and pinks. Although she'd rather still be asleep, she loves to be able to witness the sunrise too.
If she could go back and start all of this again, would it make any difference? Would she change who she was to be with her professor? Three years after the disaster, she still has no idea. Despite the acrimony between them, she still cares about him, how could she not?
Out of nowhere, she experiences a strange sensation of someone watching her. Enzo? She turns her head back to the house but it's still dark. Elena is pretty sure that if he was awake, Enzo would join her on the beach. She looks around but nothing seems out of ordinary. Still the chilly feeling lingers. She follows her instinct, collects her slippers and jogs briskly back to the safety of her home.
After showering and dressing casually in a pair of yoga pants and sports bra, Elena trots down the stairs and into the kitchen. As usual, Enzo is ready, handing her a cup of strong coffee.
"Kol called. You left your phone down here," he pauses, handing it to her. "Anyway, he said he was going to stop by later to pay us a visit. If you want my two cents worth, he's in dire need of his daily dose of Elena snuggles," he laughs, tipping his mug to her before taking a long swallow. "I swear he's a child in an adult's body."
Elena's lip twitches. "Enzo! You are so hard on him sometimes. Everybody loves Kol."
"Yeah, well, he shouldn't forget that it's thanks to you. It was you who suggested him for the part. That role earned him several nominations and as it seems endless popularity. Without you, he would be just another soap opera star. That is where you plucked him from obscurity."
"Have you forgotten that my first role was on a soap opera too?" she asks, quirking an eyebrow at him. When he says nothing, Elena smiles at Enzo's grumbling.
"I haven't forgotten, Elena. But he's just Kol. I don't know what else to say but because he puts a smile on your face, I'm glad he stops over to check on you now and then. But," he predicates, pointing his finger at her, "If you ever tell him that, mark my words, my revenge will be sweet."
He winks at her then pours himself a second cup before reaching into the refrigerator to pull out some cantaloupe and hands it to her.
Elena laughs, "If you say so… but I'm almost certain that he comes over to see you as well."
Enzo finally chuckles and helps himself to some of the fruit. "Of course, because he wants me to take him under my wing so his sorry ass won't drop off the radar in the blink of an eye."
"Be nice, Enzo."
"Listen,' he starts again, "did you sleep at all? Because although I understand everything that you're going through, risking your health is not an option. I saw you on the beach at fucking 4:30 in the morning."
"Ah, it was you…," her reaction is not exactly what he expected.
"What you mean it was me?"
"I just had a funny feeling that someone was watching me. I'm not gonna lie, it freaked me out a bit so I ran back home." She pauses to take a bite of her cantaloupe. Once she swallows it, she takes another sip of coffee. "You could have joined me, you know?"
"But I didn't follow you, Elena... I looked around and after I saw you, I figured you wanted to be by yourself so I went back to bed."
They both look at each other, mixed feelings mirrored on their faces.
As soon as he steps into his hotel room, Damon loosens his tie and plops down on the couch. He had a good day, his lecture was quite productive it feels good to have some semblance of control. He feels more like himself and mainly he's glad that he didn't forget to call Vanessa this morning before he left to wish her a good day. After showering and having a pleasant breakfast, the audience was very attentive, asking good questions and gave him a rousing round of applause when he completed his talk.
Sighing, he relaxes back into the couch, his head falling back. He stares at the ceiling for a little while and after some downtime, he finally feels confident enough to call Elena. They need to move on and complete their conversation so he can get back to his fiancé. He reaches into his pocket and pulls out his phone. Holding a breath, he pushes her icon, why does he still keep it? He waits several rings and is about to hang up when he hears Enzo's voice on the other end of the line.
"Damon, sorry man, she's napping, she didn't sleep at all last night so I'm not waking her up. But if you want to partake in another private lecture, you can come over after four... NOT before."
"Ha ha, very funny! Are you sure she'll be available later or are you just shitting me? You're the last one I need to take advice from. I just want to get the papers signed, so..."
"Well, it is funny, Professor because I have many things that I would like to say to you, however, she wouldn't like it so I keep my mouth shut. So yes, she will be ready to see you later this afternoon."
Fuming, Damon pulls the phone away from his mouth for a minute. He takes a deep breath and then snaps, "You're sure?"
"See you Damon!" Enzo sing-songs and ends the call.
Damon has a feeling that one day he'll lose control and hurt that man.
By the time the cab pulls up in front of Elena's home, his stomach is roiling. He needs to stay on message so he tries to silently give himself a pep talk. It's a little after 4 when he pushes the doorbell. While he waits, he happens to notice the shiny black Mercedes sitting in her driveway. Taking a breath, he appreciates the beauty of such quality German craftsmanship. It dawns on him that it must be Enzo's toy. In his mind, it's more of a guy car. His eyes snap towards the door when he hears a noise.
Enzo opens the door and holds it open for him, Damon greets him with a nod.
"Sorry, we have a visitor, but she won't keep you waiting for too long."
"Do you always speak for her?" Damon tries to keep his voice void of any irritation.
"Always," Enzo replies sweetly with a smirk on his face. "Anytime she needs me to. It's my job." He gestures for Damon to follow along as he leads him through the house and outside to the pool area. He's taken aback but tries to hide it when he sees another guy, laughing loudly, his hand on Elena's knee. Probably another actor or filmmaker, he surmises.
"Kol, this is Damon Salvatore. He and Elena are old acquaintances. Damon, this is Kol Mikaelson, Elena's "Tomorrow" co-star. And yes, he's a good friend too," Enzo adds with an eye roll when he sees Kol about to protest.
"Hey," Kol blurts out, "Are you the Damon Salvatore?" He quickly stands up to offer his hand. "My older brother is absolutely crazy about your books. I swear he was the first in line when they started to sell tickets for your lecture next week. He is going to be so jealous," Kol squeals, high-fiving Elena.
Damon shakes his hand, a little taken aback but pleasantly surprised nonetheless.
"Elena, why didn't you tell Elijah that you knew the Professor? You know he's a huge fan."
"Damon and I haven't seen each other for years, Kol. I rather doubt that Elijah would ask for an autograph and Damon doesn't exactly hang out with people in our line of work," Elena chuckles but Damon can tell it doesn't reach her eyes. She looks tired.
"Oh well, we can tell him now." Kol's enthusiasm is not easy to contain, "I hope you'll consider meeting my brother, he's not me, he's actually interested in art and history and that boring stuff. You won't be disappointed."
"What he means," Enzo interferes, "is.. if you need a sponsor, Elijah Mikaelson is the right person to talk to. Half of the exorbitant sums of money he spends goes to his charities and for research grants. History and art are his hobbies."
Fuming inside Damon wants to ask them who in the hell they think he is, begging for funds, he silently scoffs at the notion. Before he opens his mouth to rebut, he realizes that the Dean would want him to talk with any potential benefactors. He deflates quickly, they're all actually being sweet.
That feeling lasts all of about thirty seconds because suddenly he feels disgusted by everyone in this room, including himself. He's not aware of the emotions that he's expressing on his face but he does try to maintain a neutral façade especially when he notices Elena watching him.
"Hey Doc, tell us what you thought about "Tomorrow'," Kol addresses him again. "Elena should have won the Oscar, right? She was incredible in it. I actually feared to touch her many times, she was so fragile, losing weight to play the part, as did I but that's a side matter. She played the part so spot on, the poor mute girl who had such strength. While we were shooting, I didn't even realize how it was her who pulled me through the scenes, it was magical. I don't think I'll ever have another experience like that. It was that powerful." He extends his hand and squeezes Elena's knee again.
Damon really doesn't know how to react to this. These people are from a totally different world. They clearly feel like royalty, they're touchy and feely with each other, he feels nauseous seeing this guy's, this Kol's paws on her and Enzo's okay with it? Fucking unbelievable.
"Cut him some slack, Kol, he didn't see the movie, he's dedicated to his art and science... that world," Elena speaks before he can and Damon actually feels a little bad that he didn't, clearly it's a big deal to some people.
"No?" Kol almost drops his glass. "Seriously man, you really missed her award winning role? Movies are art, different from what you study but art nonetheless. I'm going to have to remedy that, I have a copy of the film at home. I like to look at myself," he teases, playfully squeezing Elena's knee. Damon's eyes drift between the two of them. He knows the guy is friendly but he can still see the wall that exists between their world and his.
Elena stands up and motions for him to follow. "Well, Kol, I need to go, I promised Damon that we'd catch up but feel free to stay and chat with Enzo. We can talk more later?" she bends to him and Kol pulls her down for a short hug and a kiss placed somewhere between her neck and shoulder. He grins at Damon over her shoulder before he lets her go.
"I don't know, I may take you on your offer. Otherwise, I'll see you soon anyway."
"Of course, you know I'm always available to you," Elena waves at him, opens the patio gate and starts walking towards the beach after gesturing for Damon to follow.
Damon feels like a peon in a royal court, following her command like one of her other subjects would.
Elena takes a deep breath to fortify herself, again she motions for Damon to follow along.
For some reason Damon looks back over his shoulder, not the least surprised when Enzo smirks at him. He loathes him but the guy is suave and cool enough to fit in 007's shoes without even having to put an effort into it. Her home is huge, the rear of the home faces the Pacific ocean and the place that she leads him to is a garden. It's a beautiful mix of roses, wildflowers, Palm trees, succulents and there's even a variety of fruit trees, all combine to provide for an almost surreal landscape.
He pauses a moment to take in the full effect, it's then that he even sees a small plot filled with tomato plants. This place is so much more than he can afford but he knows her well enough to deduce that it's a sanctuary for her. They continue on without words finally ending up in a small but airy summerhouse. Besides the enthralling view, the Malibu bluffs, it's fully equipped with all the amenities including a fridge and a mini bar.
"Comfy," Damon comments as he relaxes for the first time now that they're free from Enzo and that Kol guy. Not that he wanted to be alone with her.. but truthfully they've always been at their best when they're free from the people that inhabit her world.
Elena hands him his favorite bourbon, she settles for a beer. "Yeah, it's comfortable, we both like it here a lot. Not only is it a wonderful place to relax but the best part is that we can have our privacy. At this hour, it's too hot by the swimming pool, one sunburn was enough for me to learn that. I do enjoy the view of the ocean, watching and listening the waves as they crash onto the beach. The bluffs are gorgeous. Sometimes Enzo and I go hiking out there."
Damon presses his lips together at the "we" although he's well aware it's completely ridiculous that the word irritates him. But no matter where they are or are not in their nonexistent relationship, Enzo just rubs him in the wrong way.
Elena opens her mouth to explain Kol, which is quite a herculean task in and of itself, but then she thinks better of it, there's no reason to try to get Damon see him for what he is, a fucking good talented actor with a big heart and soul of a child.
Why does she feels the need to explain anything? Old habits die hard. Damon would never want to spend the time getting to know him, he's too complacent, preferring instead to hang around with other likeminded intellectuals. Quite frankly, Kol is a gem and for Damon to shun such a good man is his loss.
She's quite surprised at her own thoughts and her instincts have always been spot on but not with Damon. Never did she imagine that they'd find themselves here, in this awkward, even hostile place. Even though she's voluntarily put herself here, with him, alone, she knows that she needs it. Not because of some misplaced and malicious need to punish him or to rub her truth in his face but because she needs answers. Is there really nothing left of them... or was there ever a them in the first place? For just once she needs to see the great professor Dr. Damon J. Salvatore as a mere mortal.
Damon clears his throat, startling her out of her reverie.
"Sorry," she looks aside, "I just have a lot on my mind."
"Look, Elena, I understand this is hard but it's also completely unnecessary. There's no need..."
"Have you ever picked up your phone to call me? Did you ever even consider it at all in the last three years? Have you?"
Damon freezes in shock but he quickly recovers. "You have no right to ask me that, I hate to repeat myself..."
"How long was it before you decided that you waited long enough? What amount of time did you consider decent before you hopped into bed with Vanessa?"
"Pot meet kettle," he snaps. He throws back his bourbon and then grabs the bottle and pours himself another. He levels a disdainful glare at her, "Don't you think that you being with Enzo precludes you...?"
"How long did it take before you packed my things and shoved them to the loft?"
"Elena..." Damon starts losing patience, her name from his mouth sounds like a warning. However Elena's opinionated and strong and won't back down.
"How many of your colleagues and friends even know that you're a married man?"
"This is not fair!"
"How many of those who do know, have any of them ever heard you mention who your wife is?" she lowers her voice and continues as it doesn't look like he's going to take initiative.
"How many of my movies can you name?"
Damon's just opening his mouth to tell her what he thinks about her brand of "therapy", he's in total shock this is even happening when the bushes next to the summerhouse crackle. Elena's head jerks in that direction and he can see she's rather shaken.
"Hey!" Damon jumps up and runs outside catching up with a stranger blundering among the trees and bushes. He's got an athletic build, curly black hair and a few days worth of scruff coloring his face. Damon launches at him, tackling him to the ground. As soon as he subdues him, Damon pulls him to his feet but maintains a firm hold on him.
"Who are you? Why are you trespassing on private property and lastly what are you doing here?"
"I know who he is! He's a journalist. Atticus Shane is his name," Elena offers and Damon's not sure how long she can hold up.
Atticus looks shaken himself and Damon would almost feel sorry for the guy but he does have a camera and there's no way he didn't know what he's doing. The raised voices attract Enzo's attention and he comes running towards them. Without a pause, he punches Atticus so hard that he sends him crashing onto the sand.
"Start explaining!" he yells, Damon can't believe this is the same Enzo, the one he despises. "And for your sake I hope it's good or I'm calling the police."
Damon helps the journalist to his feet, although there is an urge to give him one more beat down, seeing how Elena's psyched-out. Enzo too turns his focus on her and takes her into his arms. He looks at Atticus again.
"Don't even think of taking any pictures. Actually...," he motions for him to hand him the camera. Before Atticus can react Enzo snatches it, takes out the memory card and puts it in his pocket, then gives the camera back to the intruder.
"Here, you can sue me. But you can make bank on one thing, I'll make your life a living hell."
His eyes dart from Damon to Enzo and when he sees Damon's free hand closing into a fist, he silently runs away as soon as he can feel the grip loosen on his shirt.
Damon looks at the two of them and feels he should give them some privacy. He takes a walk along the beach. For some reason, the thought of going back to his empty hotel room doesn't sound appealing right now.
When he gets back to Elena's home, he is shocked when Enzo doesn't even ask him, he simply hands him a plate. Damon finds himself thinking about the bane of his existence. However he isn't going to give him the satisfaction of getting into it with him. Instead he bites into the great big cheeseburger. It has a huge piece of ground beef, cheese, barbecue sauce, bacon and onion rings all piled in a huge bun. It's delicious and he realizes that Enzo seems to be a man of many talents.
Not that he's any too pleased with himself at the thought of having to give the guy credit.
After dinner, Damon watches as Elena disappears around the house. He wipes his mouth, finishes what's left in his beer bottle and then follows after to tell her that he's leaving. They won't accomplish any more today anyway. He's a little surprised when she stays by the house rather than walk down to the water's edge, probably because of that bastard photographer. He doesn't understand a lot since he came out here, seeing her again has turned him inside out and yet he hates that she isn't doing something she loves because of that interloper. Being a movie star must suck sometimes.
"Elena? I'm heading back to my hotel, we probably won't continue this..." he pauses not bothering with explanation, she surely understands.
"Yes of course you're right Professor, you're always right aren't you? I... if you want, just bring me the papers tomorrow morning. It's clear to me that you don't want to talk, you don't even want to be around me. I don't actually blame you, I guess it was a misjudgment on my part, a bad idea as you so aptly put..."
There it is...the golden ticket, his freedom, his way out.
But now Damon's not sure he wants to take it. There are still many unanswered questions, on both sides. He swallows thickly, her resignation, her lackluster tone makes his heart tighten in his throat. The defeated and tired lilt to her voice, it's not her. He doesn't understand why it should make him feel funny inside but it does and rather than end it like this, he finds himself saying, "I'll call you tomorrow, Elena. I'll be here for another two weeks. We'll figure something out if it's this important to you."
"Isn't it important to you too? At least a little bit? To make things right?"
Damon shrugs and doesn't reply, he'd have to tell her nothing can make the situation right, not at this point. He could drive the dagger in and end it all right now but he cannot do that to her, even the thought of doing it... hurts.
His taxi is already idling on the road in front of her home. Elena about to close the door behind when he grabs it, stopping her. He pauses because there's still one thing bugging him.
"Elena?"
She turns back to him again, waiting for his question.
"Why did you ask me all the questions, why those questions? Were you making a point or...?"
Elena sighs, but doesn't deny him a response.
"Because, Damon... I honestly don't think you ever really loved me."
Eva and I are so grateful for all of your encouragement, support, incredible reviews, following and making this one a favorite. It's difficult to find the right words to tell you all how incredibly thankful both Eva and I are for all of you.
Thank you too, Eva. LOVE. YOU. DEARLY.
Chapter title: 'Pain' by Three Days Grace.
Many dear friends have stories in progress. Short on words has 'A Wonderful Lie' in progress, she recently returned to it after an extended hiatus. Mariah April May has two fabulous stories: 'The Devil's Obsession' and 'Marry Me Instead'. Florencia7 has authored many incredible DE and Capt. Jack Sparrow tales, JustiniaKorax has her already amazing 'The Things She Felt While He Was Gone. Salvatoreboys4ever's romantic-thriller 'Captive of Her Beauty' continues. TheLittle MissVixen just started new, 'Before The Devil Knows You're Dead, schattentinte, StarlightSo, Amazing Aisha, and VitsAsh are among so many others who are keeping Damon and Elena alive through their stories.
We have an ICEM Valentine coming...
I hope you all have a fantastic day and thank you all again. Until next time.