Disclaimer: I do not own anything Twilight or VD
D.A.M.O.N.
When Bella first came to town, I was immediately drawn to her. It was as if she was the thing I had been searching for my whole life and it had finally been placed in front of me. Just when I thought I would be alone forever here came this wisp of a woman. Of course, everyone had warned me to stay away from her or else I would suffer bodily harm. It was mostly Elena and Stephan who told me to leave her alone, but when did I ever do what they wanted?
To be fair, I tried to do what they wanted. Not for them, but for her and myself. I knew I was no good for her and I knew in the end she would just end up as broken as all the other girls I messed with. But the more she came near me, the less I cared about what anyone wanted but me. Plus, even if I had tried to stay away from her I don't think she listened much when they also told her to be careful of me because whenever I looked her way, those gorgeous brown eyes were directed right at me. Everyone had tried to warn her that I was dangerous, but my sweet little Bella did anything but stay away.
My feelings for Elena were gone the second I laid eyes on her beautiful face. She wasn't someone I would have EVER gone for but that was why I just had to have her. You could tell she had some work done to her hair and that usually indicated that she needed a break from whatever demons she was running from. She subconsciously always pulled at her shirt or hair and you could just see how she felt less than everyone else without her ever saying anything. I felt bad for her and just wanted to see her smile. Her smile made me want to keep to her, to never let anyone else have her…and that frightened me most.
What I instantly felt for her scared the crap out of me and I admit I was scared, this was something deeper than even my feelings had been for Katherine. Katherine never had to lie to me about what she was or what she did to survive, but I felt I needed to protect Bella from my life. From the things I had done in the past and the haunted memories of all the people I had killed. I had never felt this attracted to a human or felt the need to protect them this strongly…well maybe Elena. But as I watched Bella I knew protecting Elena was for my brother and for our relationship.
Usually I just wanted to play with the girls I used as my food supply. Playing with them sexually was always their choice and I never had to force myself on any woman. After playtime was over, I would then set them loose on the town as a newborn or with a compulsion of some sort that would make them misbehave. But with this one, I did indeed want to play with her, but I didn't want to harm her in any way I would have in the past.
Bella was shy which was sexy as hell. Unlike her friends, she stayed in the background and enjoyed living. Behind her beautiful brown eyes, I could see that she was years beyond her age and it shattered me to think she had been through hell for someone still in her teens. She was quiet but once you got to know her she came out of her shell and could hold her own. Her beauty came from her heart and not her looks which made me think I could be a better person. I knew she was trying to be someone she wasn't at times which showed me how strong she was and how unhappy she was with her old life. I knew that I could help her become stronger and happier if we allowed ourselves to run in the same circles, so to speak.
After a couple days of us playing around, things got serious. Another love interest came into play, one that everyone approved us. Matt was a safe guy, and everyone knew he would be the best guy to be with Bella, he basically was Bella. And that was exactly why I thought they never would have lasted, because they were one in the same and no matter how hard they tried to be happy with each other, it was never going to work. He was too nice and even though he loved fiercely, he loved too much and too often and that was going to be their end.
So, I played their game, and I let them have their fun. And I stepped aside and had a little bit of my own fun while I waited patiently for them to realize it was never going to work. I wanted them to realize, what they shared, was friendship and a deep trust. They were playing it safe with one another and eventually she was going to realize, Matt wasn't for her. She would soon realize that if she chose him, her life would be dull and boring and there was never going to be time for anything fun. I could offer her everything she ever wanted…and more. All she had to do was close her eyes and leap.
What hurt the most was when her ex called her. The way her face went pale and her heart froze, tore at me in a way I wanted it to stop. Her eyes glazed over and the scared feeling coming off her body had me in protecting mode. She completely broke down, it was something I had only seen a couple times in my life and the ending was never good. They either ended up dead from a stroke or they ended up in a mental asylum due to extreme stress that breaks them.
And when her ex had the balls to show up on her doorstep I just knew I had to protect her from harm. To say that I never expected Bella to be caught up with the likes of him and his family was an understatement. I needed to know more about what her life was like the last 2 years, but I also knew I wanted to hear the story from herself.
Then when her second ex showed up out of the blue, I was half crazed with murder. I wanted to rip this one to shreds, more than the first. I couldn't believe my lovely girl was already so sewn into the supernatural world. I was grateful though that she would be able to handle the news that I was a vampire, but I was also scared that she would reject me. Maybe she was over the supernatural and wanted a nice, normal human…like Matt. I guess now I could see why she wanted someone like him, he was never going to accidently suck her dry or turn her into the walking dead. Maybe she was over vampires and werewolves…I think it would shatter me to think she would never look at me the same way agin.
The thing that really killed me was the look on her face when she caught me with Katherine, who I'm pretty sure she thought was her cousin, Elena. After everything she had been through in the last 24-hours was nothing to her, until that moment. I just pushed the knife so far into her heart, I don't think it was ever going to come out. I tried to tell her it was a mistake but the look of despair in her eyes, would haunt me for the rest of my life. I don't think I ever felt my death until the moment I saw hate in her eyes.
I couldn't stand the pain in my chest and the pain in her eyes, so I left. I had to think about what I wanted in life and if my own selfish needs were more important than the broken girl I left at home. I needed to make better choices for myself and I knew that whatever I chose now, was either going to help us or break us.
I may have only known Bella for a couple weeks, but I knew I needed her like I needed blood to survive.
When I came back, everyone was at the hot springs behind my house, laughing and having a good time. Of course, they were all pissed off at me for what happened to Bella and most of them couldn't wait to tell me 'I told you so' and I promised to stay away from Bella unless it was what she wanted.
I didn't want to hurt her anymore and I think they almost believed me. I hadn't hurt her so far an I had never intended to hurt her at all, hurting Bella was like hurting myself. I knew Caroline was routing for me to win and I didn't understand it. Not until we talked the morning before the whole Katherine fiasco.
"Damon, wait up." I paused on the way to my room to shower. I had just come back from Bella's and wanted to hurry so I could be back before she woke up.
"Hey Caroline, what can I help you with today?"
"Bella." The simple word perked me up and I was curious about what she had to say. Was she going to warn me away like all the others or cheer me on?
"What about her?"
"I just wanted to tell you that I'm hoping you win. Don't get me wrong, this isn't a game where Bella is the trophy. But she has been through more than anyone could understand, and she deserves to be happy…so don't you. I know we all know you to be the bad guy in just about any case, but she's bringing out a side no one knows. I like this new side. She is good for you Damon, just like your good for her." Caroline being this nice either meant she wanted something or she was growing up.
"I will never be good enough for her. All I do is hurt people…" I sat on the top stair and ran a hand through my hair. She sat next to me and placed a hand on my back.
"Her eyes light up when you come in the room. She digs deep inside herself and embraces her fierce powers. She wants to prove to you that she isn't some innocent little girl. She is trying to prove to you, to all of us, that she can hold her own. She wants you, but I think she doesn't know if you want her. Do you understand Damon?"
"I want her. More than I care to admit, and it scares me." I sounded like an adolescent with my first girl.
"Juts be there for her…and don't do anything stupid." We both laughed, knowing it was inevitable that I was going to mess up somewhere along the way. It was just who I was, I always ruined something before I found a way to make it all better.
I shook my head to clear it of the cobwebs. I knew I could count on Caroline if I was ever in trouble. I may have been why she was brought into the supernatural, but I think she was secretly thankful. Although we had a rocky start, Caroline was the strongest out of everyone and I knew her life one day would lead to something magical.
When Bella came with Matt, I wanted nothing more than to pull her into my arms and hold her close. But I didn't, I let Matt comfort her and hold her as my brother introduced Katherine to her. She was so shocked to find her cousin had a twin. She fainted, not being able to handle the déjà vu. I knew that since she now knew about Katherine, apologizing for this afternoon would be a lot easier.
When she woke up, I watched as her eyes grew curious when Alice and her mate showed up and Stephen began telling his story. I was a little curious to learn their story, but I was more curious to hear the rest of Bella's. I knew I would probably try to kill someone by the end of this night. I wonder how she would feel once she heard my story. I hoped by being truthful and honest with her, will clue her in to who I was and no longer wanted to be.
So, after everything, she was more hurt than pissed at me. And I couldn't fault her for that. I did hurt a lot of people and one of them was now one of her best friends. But me, I was livid, not only did I want to kill sparkles, but I also wanted to kill the pup. Looks like there would be two more deaths in Mystic Falls. I hope Bella was relieved and felt safer with them out the way.
So, I took some time and ran around looking for them, sparkles must have had a warning and was probably hiding from me as we speak, and the pup was with his father, his girlfriend, and Charlie. So, I guess tonight they would live, but sooner or later I would have my revenge. I paused in the idle of the woods and wondered if Bella wanted them dead. Probably not.
I was home 20 minutes later and in bed with her. She was still being protective but making her smile was a step closer to her forgiving me. I almost didn't sleep that night but being so close to her won out and soon I was passed out beside her.
The next day I told her my side of the story and she believed me, I was more than excited about it. I told her I also wouldn't push her for anything more than her happiness, even if that meant she was happier with Matt than with me. She was going to kiss me, but the bitch cock blocked me. Bella was livid, so I left and went home to tell everyone Bella would be at the beach. So, while everyone waited for Bella, I needed to speak with Charlie.
I talked to him for an hour before heading back to the beach. I told him how I felt about Bella and asked his permission to date her. I know I didn't need it, but it felt like the right thing to do. With me being years older and a vampire, I needed him to understand that I would never hurt his young human daughter. I promised to protect her with my life and after an hour of us talking, he agreed to let it be up to Bella.
Charlie was a lot cooler with the whole supernatural thing than I thought. Although he wasn't too happy with his friend about keeping secrets and he wasn't happy about the big guy and what he was. Though when I was leaving, Jake was explaining the whole thing about imprinting and tried to weasel his way out of getting an ass whooping about how he hurt Bella. I think Charlie had an idea about the whole love at first sight thing, because the last couple weeks him and Caroline's mom had been secretly dating.
Well to them it was a secret, but I knew. It just wasn't my place to tell anyone, especially Bella and Caroline. Although I don't think they would mind since they were becoming fast friends themselves. It was nice to see Bella be friends with Caroline, she was a great person and a great influence. I couldn't understand how Bella and Elena were so close.
Having sex with Bella in the woods was the most breath-taking thing I had ever done. The way she glowed and the way she smelled of me after…there were no words. She gave me her virginity and I knew I would always cherish it. After that I knew I had to have her in my life for good and I was going to tell her just how I felt in a few days, I must sort out the feelings floating around in me first.
I wanted to murder him and strangle her. Watching Edward grope over my woman was killing me. But I made a promise to her that she could have all the fun she wanted before she realized we deserved the biggest chance of all. The way his hands slid up and down her sides as her ass ground into his hips was sick. I knew the mind reader could tell I was ready to do some serious damage because he left her and left the party. He was smart to realize I wouldn't hesitate to take him out, but I knew he had a good time helping her make me realize that I loved her.
It took me a month, but I was totally in love with Bella Swan.
That love got her pregnant. That's right, PREGNANT!
When she told me weeks later, I thought she was lying. Vampires couldn't have kids and I thought she honestly cheated on me. I mean I don't think Bella was the type of girl to cheat but how else would a baby show up. Sure, we were having lots of sex and it was always unprotected, but what Vampire had a blood relation after being turned?
When I talked to Carlisle, he told me it was possible for the men of his kind to sire children. The woman had to be human and most births ended the mother's life because the child would rip itself from the womb. He told me he had never seen it done but had read many books on the subject. He also told me it could be possible for my kind to do the same since we were more human than we thought.
That would also explain how Klaus has a daughter with Hailey. He was a vampire all in all even if he was part werewolf. Maybe I should introduce him to the big guy and see who had the bigger balls.
I left to do a little soul searching, trying to wrap my head around everything that was happening. Never in a million years did I ever think I would be a dad. To have a baby with the woman I was desperately in love with. I knew I had to make it up to her for just disappearing and not telling her anything. I didn't want her to think I don't care about her or our child, because I cared so much it physically hurt.
So, I send her very special presents. They were family heirlooms and I hoped that once Stephan saw them and explained somethings about them, that she would know I cared and that when I was ready I would come back.
And then for her birthday I decked out her kitchen with flowers, balloons, candles, a cake, and many more gifts. To says he was surprised was an understatement. Yes, she was mad, but I think she was more excited that I was finally back. Back to a place where I had left my heart. Back to a place I knew I needed to return and make up for a lot I did wrong in the last couple weeks. Back to a place that would forever be in my heart…
Home.