Here's a chapter to end your weekend with :)

Barba tapped his finger on the rim of his glass and glanced at his watch. He took a sip of scotch and pursed his lips.

"Relax, she'll be here," Olivia assured him as she hung up her phone, "and Carisi and Rollins are on their way."

As if on cue, the front door of the bar opened. Both Barba and Benson turned. Alex walked through the doorway and scanned the tables before landing on them.

She walked over, "Liv," she said, "it's good to see you. And Barba," she turned to look at him, "your reputation precedes you."

"As does yours."

"Now can I ask what all the cloak and dagger is about?" Alex looked back at Olivia as she sat down at the table.

"Do you know anyone at Rikers?" Barba asked, forgoing any explanation.

"Well, I've prosecuted quite a few cases," Cabot said.

"But anyone you care about? Family? Friends? Any inmates or guards?" Barba pressed.

"No," Alex said, "now will you tell me what's going on?"

Barba sighed and took a sip of his scotch, "Olivia trusts you, and from what I know, that says a lot. You also had quite the reputation while prosecuting sex crimes. I've spoken with the DA, and he has agreed to bring you back as an ADA."

"And why exactly would I be returning to the DA's office?" Alex asked, turning to look at Olivia.

"Barba's been receiving threats," Olivia explained, "and the assaults have gotten physical. We have reason to believe there are Rikers guards behind it."

"Oh, god."

"We have a suspect," Barba added, "but he's too afraid to talk. His niece is in Rikers and Carisi and Rollins just met with her."

Just then the door to the bar opened and Carisi and Rollins walked in. They joined the table of three and squeezed around it.

"We were just catching Alex up," Benson explained.

Carisi nodded, "we met with Miranda, she's terrified of someone, but won't tell us a thing."

"Anyone who has someone they care about at Rikers is at risk of being exploited," Amanda continued, "the guards have total control over the inmates, all they have to do is use them as leverage."

"I'll see what I can do about getting your suspects niece transferred out of Rikers. What is she in for?" Alex asked.

"Possession."

"Okay," Cabot nodded, "it shouldn't be too hard to convince a judge to release her as an eyewitness. We'll get her and your suspect into protective custody if they flip on the guards."

"So you're taking the case," Carisi pressed.

"Yes," she pursed her lips, looking at Barba, "it's not going to be easy to build a case against these guys, but you've already proven it possible."

"You do understand the risks, right?" Barba held her gaze, "I indicted one of their own and they're after my head."

"I've never been one to shy away from a fight," Alex smiled.

Barba nodded, "I'll set up a meeting with you and Rita Calhoun, the suspects attorney."

Alex nodded and she and Barba exchanged information. Barba pulled out his phone and took a few steps away from the table to make a call.

"Alex," Olivia started, "I want you to stay with me until the trial is over."

"I'll be fine, Liv."

"I'm not taking that risk, not again."

XXX

"You think Francis will flip?" Sonny asked as he walked beside Rafael down the hall toward his apartment.

"I hope so," Barba sighed, "Cabot's meeting with Calhoun in the morning, we'll find out then."

Barba unlocked the deadbolts, but Carisi took the handle. He opened the door and took a step inside, "wait in the hall," he whispered. With his hand rested on his gun he did a sweep of the apartment and then returned to the door, "can't be too careful."

When they were both inside with all the locks turned, Barba poured two glasses of scotch and sat on the couch. Carisi took the glass from Barba, but set it on the table beside him without taking a drink.

"I know these past few days have been hard," Sonny sat beside him, "but we're gonna catch this son of a bitch."

"It's not SVU I doubt," Barba replied.

"Well, until you're safe, we're going to protect you."

"What about after?" Barba looked at Sonny. He looked into his blue eyes and couldn't imagine a pair more beautiful. Right now they were filled with concern and concentration, but Rafael wished more than anything that he could see them without that worry.

"I'm here as long as you'll take me," Sonny smiled, "you don't have to worry about that. Now if I recall correctly, there should be some pasta in the fridge that I can heat up for us."

"That sounds great."

Carisi stood and walked into the kitchen. As he prepared their dinner, his mind was elsewhere. He thought about Rafael and about his conversation with Amanda earlier. Telling Amanda about his feelings had been terrifying, but he had felt this sort of relief after. Knowing that he could be himself around her, that he didn't have to try and put up a front anymore. He thought about what he would feel like if he told Rafael.

He had been uncertain at first, but Sonny was just about sure that Barba had the same feelings as him. The past few days had felt different, and Carisi couldn't ignore the things Barba had said. It wasn't him misinterpreting glances, these were words, actual words that Rafael had said.

It only took a few minutes to prepare their dinner, but by the time Sonny set the plates on the kitchen counter, his heart was beating fast.

He barely tasted the pasta as he ate, he couldn't stop looking at Rafael.

And when they were done Rafael took the plates and rinsed them off before setting them in the sink. "The benefit of not cooking is that I never have to do the dishes."

"At what cost?" Carisi asked, "take out every night?"

Rafael chuckled, "cleaning dishes is worth it if it means eating your pasta. My cooking on the other hand..."

"Then I'll have to cook for you more often," Sonny smiled as Barba walked toward him.

"I'd like that."

Rafael looked at him, their eyes meeting. Sonny could see that slight smiled on the other man's face, one that often only made an appearance when he was pleased with how court had gone that day. Sonny's heart skipped a beat and he leaned forward, placing his lips on Rafael's in a kiss.

But Rafael didn't kiss him back.

Sonny pulled away. His heart dropped and and his face burned, for a moment he couldn't move or speak.

"I should–" Barba took a step back, "um, I should get to bed."

Sonny did nothing as he watched Barba turn and walk away. Shame filled him. How could he have done this, how could he have been so wrong.

His chest felt both heavy and hollow.

He pulled out his phone and dialed, barely aware of what he was doing, no thought to what he was going to say.

Less than twenty minutes later there was a light knock on the door. Carisi checked the peep hole before opening the door.

"Sonny, what's wrong?" Amanda asked as she walked into the apartment.

Carisi began to pace, back and forth, he couldn't make eye contact with her, "I messed up, I really messed up."

"Hey," Amanda stopped him with a hand on his shoulder, "talk to me."

He finally looked up at her, "I kissed him."

And Amanda could tell from his tone, from his face, "I'm really sorry, Carisi."

"I just... he's in his room and I..." he began to pace again, "I can't believe I did that... I can't believe... I've ruined everything."

"It's gonna be okay."

"No, no, it's not," he shook his head.

"Why don't you go home? I can take over here, it's not a problem."

Carisi slowed to a stop, "Jessie," he said, "I didn't even think, I'm so sorry."

"I got a sitter," she said, "and I've got this covered. Go home, get some sleep, and call me if you need anything."

"I–" Carisi almosted declined her offer, but he didn't know how much longer he could stay in the apartment, "thanks," he said finally, almost sheepishly.

When Carisi stepped outside of the apartment building, he could finally take a breath. He waited for his ride outside, and when it pulled up, he got in. He almost gave the driver his address, but at the last second changed his mind. He stared out the window and they drove, the bright lights of the city blurring past his watering eyes.

When they pulled up in front of the precinct Carisi paid the driver and got out. He wiped his eyes before entering the building, although he was pretty sure he wouldn't run into anyone from the day shift. He rode the elevator alone and when he got to the squad room he went right to his desk.

He began looking for any Rikers connections to the department and the DA's office. Anyone with someone at Rikers could be exploited, and was therefore a threat to the case. He started a list, writing down names, relations, charges, and sentences. His eyes burned, but he didn't dare stop working. He couldn't stop. He couldn't let himself think.

His eyes were glued to his computer screen and he didn't hear Benson walk into the squad room.

"Who's with Barba?" She asked, standing beside him.

Carisi jumped and then turned to her, "Rollins is there. I just, I needed a break."

Olivia pulled a chair over to his desk and sat, "what's wrong?"

"Nothing," he blew off her question, "but I started looking into Rikers connections. There's a judge with a daughter there, possession with intent, and–"

"Carisi," she interrupted him, "you can't work all night like this, you need sleep. You need a break."

"You're here," he looked away from her.

"I haven't been pulling overnight security details. Look, if it doesn't involve the case, you don't have to tell me what's going on, but I'm here, okay?" She tilted her head, "this job is tough, you'll burn out if you don't take care of yourself."

Carisi sighed, exhaustion overcoming his body, "I need to be here. I just, I can't go home, not tonight."

Liv nodded, "use the crib. I'll be in my office if you need anything. And you're not to follow any leads outside of this office, okay?" She gave him a stern look.

"Got it, Cap."