In the morning, Derek woke up and found Addison sleeping beside him. It was early, and he knew Addison had been working hard taking care of their son. He wanted to do something nice for her, and for Nate. Breakfast. That's something he could do. Derek slipped out of bed, carefully, so he wouldn't wake Addison, and made his way downstairs. He looked around and realized what he wanted to make: pancakes. As he started gathering the ingredients, he heard a knock on the door.
"Mom," Derek rushed to the door, looking upstairs and hoping it didn't wake Addison and Nate.
"Sorry, I didn't realize I wasn't supposed to wake them," Carolyn whispered, almost mockingly.
"Yeah, I was gonna make them breakfast or something," Derek added as he closed the door softly. If Addison and Nate had woken up, he would've heard footsteps by now, he thought.
"What are we making?" Carolyn asked. Derek chuckled. Of course, she'd volunteer her help without asking.
"I was thinking pancakes. Banana, Nate's favorite," Derek said, showing Carolyn the assortment of ingredients he'd laid out on the counter.
"Let's get to work then," Carolyn said, grabbing a bowl from the cupboards.
After putting together the pancake batter, Derek and Carolyn made their way upstairs to Nate's room. After all, Carolyn wanted to see her grandson. When they got there, his bed was empty. They looked at each other, confused, before heading over to Derek and Addison's bedroom, where they found Nate in bed with Addison talking animatedly while snuggling with their cat, Milo.
From where they were standing, Derek and Carolyn couldn't tell if Milo liked or disliked the fact that Nate held onto the cat like that. But all Derek could think was if this was an everyday occurrence for Nate and Addison. Did they snuggle in bed together before breakfast while he was working at St. Ambrose? Was he really gone that much?
"You know, if you don't wake up, you won't get breakfast," Addison whispered to Nate, who was snuggling against her with her eyes closed while holding onto Milo.
"Like pancakes?" Nate asked excitedly, his eyes still closed.
"I don't see why not," Addison said.
"What kind of pancakes do you want?" Addison asked, giggling while knowing his answer would be something silly. He always made her smile in the morning.
"Candy!" Nate giggled, his eyes fluttering open as he looked up at his mom. Addison raised an eyebrow and petted Milo, who was, in fact, very comfortable with Nate's arm around him on Addison and Derek's bed.
"Candy pancakes?" Addison asked, playfully tickling him. Nate nodded back enthusiastically as he giggled.
"And where are we gonna get candy for your pancakes?" Addison asked.
"Papa got it for my birfday," Nate smiled. Addison rolled her eyes.
That's why he was so excited about candy this early in the morning. Mark, for Nate's birthday yesterday, got him a chocolate bar that was as big as Nate's face. It also seemed pretty clear that Mark's nickname was here to stay.
"Of course he did," Addison remarked. She looked up and saw Derek and Carolyn standing at the door frame and smiled back at them. Nate noticed her looking beyond him and turned around to find them.
"Daddy!" Nate exclaimed.
"Hey, buddy. You want some pancakes?" Derek asked. Nate nodded back excitedly.
"Come on, Grandma helped me make pancakes," Derek said, picking Nate up when he walked over to them.
"With candy?" Nate asked.
"Candy?" Carolyn asked, amused.
"Yeah! From Papa!" Nate exclaimed.
"Mark got him a chocolate bar yesterday," Derek said.
"Papa?" Carolyn laughed, amused by Mark's apparent nickname, while Addison got out of bed.
"Yeah. Mark told him to call him that and it stuck," Derek said begrudgingly.
"Well, I don't see why we can't add it to the pancakes, then," Carolyn said. Nate's smile widened.
"I'll get Amelia and meet you guys down there," Addison chuckled. After Derek turned around, Nate waved goodbye, and Addison waved back until they disappeared from her view.
When Addison got to Amelia's room, she was still asleep. But after Addison slipped into bed next to her, Amelia rubbed her eyes sleepily after turning around to face her. She knew it had to be Addison; there was no way it would be Derek. And Nate was much smaller and probably wouldn't have woken her up until he climbed all over her.
"Morning," Amelia yawned sleepily.
"Morning," Addison chuckled.
"You really meant it when you said you'd crawl into bed with me," Amelia commented, still blinking the sleep out of her eyes.
"Yes, I did," Addison said simply, smiling back at her.
"Mmm, I was in the middle of a good dream," Amelia commented, smiling.
"What kind of good dream?" Addison asked, amused.
"One about a certain Dr. Kai Bartley," Amelia teased.
"And have you asked them out yet?" Addison asked, knowing she had a crush on them.
"No," Amelia said, almost embarrassed.
"Amelia!" Addison exclaimed.
"What? It's not like they asked me either," Amelia muttered.
"Well, maybe that means you have to ask them first," Addison pointed out.
"What are you doing here, anyway?" Amelia asked, changing the subject after realizing her nephew wasn't with her and playfully hitting Addison with a pillow.
"Mom's here. And she's making breakfast. So I told her I'd get you," Addison said, grabbing the pillow from her and throwing it farther away from them.
"Please tell me she's making pancakes," Amelia said. She hadn't had her mother's pancakes in too long.
"She is. Candy pancakes," Addison added.
"What the hell are candy pancakes? That sounds disgusting," Amelia asked, picturing pancakes with gummy bears.
"Well, since Mark got him that chocolate bar yesterday, Nate was thinking about it this morning," Addison explained.
"So, by candy pancakes, it's basically chocolate chip pancakes," Amelia gathered.
"Pretty much," Addison chuckled.
"I could go for some chocolate chip pancakes," Amelia said, sitting herself up and getting out of bed, with Addison following suit.
When they got downstairs, they found Nate standing on a dining chair with Derek behind him as he stirred a bowl of pancake batter. Beside them was Carolyn, chopping up the chocolate bar present Mark got for Nate the day before.
"Hey, squirt," Amelia greeted as Nate looked up and smiled.
"Mimi!" Nate exclaimed. Amelia chuckled and gave him a quick kiss on the cheek before going to start the coffee machine.
"Mommy, look!" Nate said, referring to the bowl he was mixing.
"You helping Daddy and Grandma make pancakes?" Addison asked playfully, leaning against the counter across from him. Nate nodded back excitedly.
"Alright, here we go," Carolyn said as she gathered the chocolate pieces and dropped them into the box.
While Nate continued stirring, Carolyn turned on the stove to heat up the pan as Addison walked past them to get to her green juice in the fridge. After giving it a shake, she poured some into a glass as she watched Carolyn guide Nate's hand to ladle some pancake batter into the pan.
"See, when you see the bubbles in the middle of the pancake, that's when you know to flip it," Carolyn said.
"Mommy, look at! Bubble!" Nate looked up to turn back toward Addison behind them.
"I see that," Addison said, moving to the other side so Nate would see her better.
When the pancake started bubbling closer toward the center, Derek guided Nate's hand as he helped him flip it with a spatula.
"Well, now we just have to cut it up and eat it," Carolyn said after Derek flipped the now-cooked pancake onto an empty plate. Meanwhile, Addison grabbed a can of cat food and put it in a pet bowl for Milo as he followed her around.
"I wanna do it, Mommy!" Nate held out his arms for Addison to pick him up.
Addison obliged and picked him up after handing him Milo's food bowl. Then she lowered him to put the bowl down to the ground and watched Milo come up to eat. Nate giggled as they watched for a minute before Addison kissed Nate's temple before lifting him up again to sit in his high chair.
Derek watched how close the two were, and he couldn't help but feel a twinge of jealousy. He knew it wasn't reasonable, but he couldn't help it after seeing the two snuggle that morning in their bed. And now, he watched their son ask for Addison, despite the fact that he was standing right behind him.
He thought he'd fixed the problem, that holding up his end of the deal by coming home for dinner and bedtime was enough. But clearly, he was wrong. It wasn't that he had to be his son's favorite, but watching how much his son talked and how attached he seemed to Addison wasn't what he expected. Carolyn brought over his pancake, which was now cut up into triangles for Nate, and he took a bite and held it out for Addison immediately afterward so she could also take a bite.
After breakfast, Derek and Amelia left for work, so they said their goodbyes before leaving. Right as they left, Gina showed up for her shift. With Addison's morning being free, she stayed to hang around Nate for longer before heading off to the office, as she did whenever she had a free morning. And Carolyn wanted as much face time as she could get with her grandson, so she stayed with Addison.
"So, how is everything, Addison?" Carolyn asked after putting Nate down for his nap and coming downstairs.
"Good. How are you?" Addison asked politely.
"Oh, come on, Addison. I thought we were past the fake niceties," Carolyn replied. Addison opened her mouth to protest, but she knew Carolyn would see right through it.
"What's going on with you and my son?" Carolyn asked, getting to the point.
"Your guess is as good as mine," Addison said honestly. Carolyn looked at her questionably.
"I don't…I don't know what's wrong. I don't know if I did something or if it's something else. He just…doesn't wanna be here. And by here, I mean, home with me," Addison rambled, biting her lip once she finished. Maybe she'd said too much. But she was the one who wanted honesty.
"He hasn't been home?" Carolyn asked, surprised.
"Well, he has been. Just…not often. This research he's been working on for Huntington's disease, it's taken up all his time and attention. I had to remind him to come home for dinner and bedtime for Nate a few months ago because he was practically living at the hospital," Addison said.
"This research project…Derek told me about it. Briefly. Isn't Amelia working on it, too?" Carolyn asked.
"Yeah, but she knows to come home at night. Most of the time," Addison replied.
"How is she, anyway?" Carolyn asked. Derek also told her about Michelle, but not until after they got Michelle into a facility. And he'd told Addison that much.
"She's good. Michelle's still sick. I mean, she will be for the rest of her life; that's the worst part of this disease. But Amelia visits her every week. I think she's made her peace with Michelle. Or she's at least getting there. She's still sober, going to meetings, and she's even thinking of asking out a colleague. Not that that's a definitive indicator that she's good, but I think she's as good as she can be right now," Addison said honestly, rambling again.
Carolyn had a certain effect on her, making her nervous despite being part of her family for well over a decade. But at least she was more honest with her now. And Carolyn, for one, preferred this version of Addison over the buttoned-up, stoic version she'd been more accustomed to previously. Even if Addison felt some kind of embarrassment rambling to her mother-in-law.
"That's good at least," Carolyn commented.
There was a brief pause as they both just stood there, letting everything sink in.
"I know I'm working less, and at a smaller practice now, but I do still remember what it was like running around, going from surgery to surgery. And I remember all the studying we did between and sleeping in on-call rooms. I do. But we're not in our 20s anymore. And it's not just the two of us anymore," Addison finally said.
"I don't mean to sound like I'm complaining. I just…miss my husband," Addison admitted softly, chuckling awkwardly.
"I understand, Addie. Derek and you have been through a lot. But I'm sure you two will get through it," Carolyn commented before they heard Addison's phone start to ring.
"Yeah. I just wish I knew what the problem was," Addison admitted before going to pick up her phone.
"Montgomery, we need you. Ojai Memorial's flying in a case just for you," Charlotte said bluntly on the other side of the phone.
"What kind of case?" Addison asked, curious.
"Drunk driver blew through a light. Hit a pregnant woman. Medics on the scene say there's also some kind of spinal injury," Charlotte explained.
"So, why are they transferring her?" Addison asked. This didn't seem like something that needed to be transferred over.
"Ojai Memorial's low on staff. And resources. We, however, are not. That enough for you?" Charlotte asked, clearly annoyed that Addison asked as she kept an eye on the busy E.R.
"I'll be right there. Tell Amelia to be ready for me," Addison said, knowing she'd need a neurosurgeon to help with the spinal injury.
"I'm sorry, Carolyn," Addison apologized.
"Oh, please. I gave birth to five doctors. I know the drill," Carolyn reminded her, brushing it off.
"You don't mind if I come with you, do you? Derek told me all about how much they've expanded since the last time I've been there," Carolyn asked.
She quite liked it last time when she followed Addison around for the day. Granted, Addison would be working at the hospital this time, but with everything she'd heard from Derek, she wanted to see how different things had become since then.
"Um…sure. I don't see why not," Addison said.
"Have a good day, Dr. Montgomery," Gina said as she loaded the dishwasher, with Addison and Carolyn waving goodbye before closing the door on their way out.
When they got to St. Ambrose, Charlotte met them at the door.
"Mrs. Shepherd. Dr. Charlotte King," Charlotte said, surprised to see her but introducing herself nonetheless while rushing Addison inside.
"Yes, it's good to see you again," Carolyn said.
The two talked about the case while Carolyn listened in. Once they went in, they walked straight toward the E.R. where they found a pregnant woman strapped onto a gurney after obviously being in an incident, leaving her injured. Addison looked back at Carolyn as she strapped on a trauma gown. Why she didn't think of where Carolyn would go while she worked before they got there was beyond her.
"Oh, don't worry about me. I'll be fine. You two go ahead," Carolyn said, stepping back as Addison strapped a trauma gown over her clothes. The last thing she wanted was for them to break HIPPA laws.
"We need a fetal doppler, and where is radiology?" Addison asked as she started examining the patient.
"Mom?" Amelia looked up and saw her mother. Carolyn waved back briefly and gestured for her to go back to work.
"I need a CT of her spine, now please," Addison said sternly.
"What have we got?" Amelia asked as she came up beside Addison, pulling on some latex gloves after strapping on a trauma gown.
"Rose Griffin, 36 weeks pregnant, full-on collision. Ojai Memorial's understaffed, so they transferred her here," Charlotte explained as Amelia started her examination.
"Possible fracture to L2 or 3," Addison added. Amelia nodded as she continued.
"Get an OR ready, I'll have to go in for a C-section," Addison directed towards Charlotte, who nodded before walking away.
Carolyn watched her daughter and her daughter-in-law from afar as they assessed and examined the patient. They worked well together, seamlessly completing the other's sentence at times. She'd never seen Amelia work before, and it impressed her. And it was interesting to hear Addison ask for Amelia instead of Derek. It was like watching a well-synchronized dance; while Amelia examined the patient, Addison talked to her to calm her down. And vice versa.
"OR two's ready for you," Charlotte said when she came back a minute later. Addison started looking around the E.R. for something specific.
"Karev, you coming?" Addison asked once she spotted Alex standing around, strapping on a trauma gown.
Carolyn looked over and saw him and realized he must've just gotten there. He nodded back to her before walking quickly to join her. Alex may have just declared he was going into peds as his specialty, but he was still Addison's go-to resident.
"Alright, Rose, we're gonna go have your baby now," Addison said calmly as she, Amelia, and Alex wheeled her out of the E.R.
"But my husband…," Rose started.
"...is on the way. Receptionist just talked to him," Charlotte informed her as they walked away. How she got so much done so fast amazed Carolyn.
Carolyn stood there a little while longer, watching until she turned around and walked the halls. She hadn't seen much of the place the last time she was here, and she wanted to find this lab Derek told her so much about. Especially since, according to Addison, he spent most of his time there. After some walking, she saw Mark and his girlfriend coming towards her at the other end of the hallway.
"Mrs. Shepherd?" Mark asked when they met in the middle of the hallway.
"Mark, it's good to see you again," Carolyn chuckled when he roped her in for a hug.
"You too, dear," Carolyn added once they pulled apart, and she looked at Lexie.
"Nice to see you, Mrs. Shepherd," Lexie smiled.
Mark nudged Lexie's elbow and they both looked at each other, making faces as if they were having a silent conversation. Mark was clearly trying to encourage Lexie to say something. and Lexie didn't fully understand what he wanted.
"The ring," Mark muttered sternly.
"Ring? You popped the question?" Carolyn asked bluntly.
"Yup. Show her,' Mark said, gesturing to Lexie. Lexie giggled and held out her hand, finding it cute that Mark wanted to show Derek's mother the ring.
"Wow. It's beautiful, Mark. Congratulations," Carolyn said. Mark smiled wide back and Lexie couldn't help but think that Mark looked like a little kid showing his mom something he drew in art class.
"What are you doing here, anyway?" Lexie asked, curious.
"Well, I thought I'd see that new lab Derek's told me all about," Carolyn replied.
"Oh yeah, we'll show you around. Lexie was just about to meet him there, anyway," Mark offered.
"It's a great lab," Lexie commented.
"You don't have to get back to work?" Carolyn asked, letting Mark guide her down the hallway he just came from.
"Lab's backed up, so I'll be waiting for a while anyway," Mark shrugged. The girls followed.
"So, what do you need Derek for, anyway?" Carolyn asked, curious.
"It's okay if you can't say. I don't wanna get you in trouble or anything," Carolyn asked.
"Dr. King gave us the thumbs on a surgery. It's risky and it's never been done before, but it'll give the patient a real shot," Lexie informed her.
"I guess I shouldn't be surprised. Amelia proposing a risky surgery. Sounds like my girl," Carolyn commented. Mark chuckled.
When they got to the lab, they found Derek and Kai working on something. Mark knocked on the outside glass and entered when both their heads lifted to see who was at the door.
"Mom? What are you doing here?" Derek asked, getting up and hugging the woman. Kai stayed back at the desk, watching from behind them awkwardly.
"I wanted to see this lab you're spending so much time at," Carolyn said bluntly.
"Mom, this is Kai," Derek said, moving over to introduce them.
"Nice to meet you," Kai said, shaking Carolyn's hand.
"You're a surgeon, too?" Carolyn asked.
"Oh, no. Neuroscientist. I let Derek and Amelia handle the cutting. I'm just a big nerd," Kai chuckled. Carolyn smiled and nodded.
"Derek, did Charlotte tell you?" Lexie asked, taking her shot once a lull hit the conversation.
"Tell me what?" Derek asked, unaware of what she meant.
"Erica said yes to the surgery! You and Amelia just need to nail down your practice time, but she said we should get to it later this week," Lexie said excitedly. Derek smiled.
"Good. You'll assist?" Derek asked, knowing she'd immediately say yes.
"Yes! Of course!" Lexie hugged him tightly before realizing Derek, while they were friends, was also her boss.
"I mean, I'd…I'd be honored," Lexie said awkwardly, still beaming. Mark and Derek chuckled, admiring how excited she was.
As Derek continued to show Carolyn around, Mark and Lexie eventually had to get back to work. Derek hadn't gotten called into the E.R., so he continued showing Carolyn the rest of the hospital. Along the way, they passed by Callie and Arizona, who were discussing something about Sofia's sleep schedule.
They saw Addison standing around a nurse's station a bit later, and they were ready to go up to talk to her, but someone else got to her first. Carolyn looked over and saw Derek look at the ground. Whoever this man was that was talking to Addison bothered him. He was a good-looking man and one that Addison clearly knew. From what she could see, he was flirting with her, and she tolerated it. But the second he stepped closer, Addison stepped back. She was pushing him away, but she also liked the attention. From what she heard from her earlier, Carolyn didn't even blame Addison for allowing another man to flirt with her.
Eventually, they circled back to the E.R. By then, it was time for Carolyn to get ready to leave. She hadn't brought her luggage to the hospital, and with Derek's day being clear, he offered to take her.
Derek drove Carolyn back to his and Addison's place, said hello and goodbye to Nate quickly, and grabbed Carolyn's luggage before he drove her to the airport. In the car, it was mostly silent other than the radio playing in the background.
"You'll lose her, you know," Carolyn commented.
"What?" Derek asked, confused, as he quickly glanced over at her before turning his attention back to the road.
"Addison. I thought you would've known by now that marriage takes work," Carolyn added.
"I do know that," Derek said.
"Yeah? Then where have you been, Derek?" Carolyn asked bluntly.
"I…what do you mean?" Derek asked.
"Addie told me you haven't been home much lately," Carolyn said.
"I've been…busy. Today was supposed to be a lab day for me. Otherwise, I would've been in and out of the O.R. all day," Derek pointed out.
"And I appreciate the tour. It's a nice hospital. And I know you're a doctor, and doctors are busy. You don't raise five doctors without knowing that. But you have a family to think about, too," Carolyn said.
"I know that. I'm just…focused on this Huntington's research," Derek said weakly.
"Well, do you want your career, or do you want your family?" Carolyn asked. Derek felt almost too stunned to speak.
"You can have both, Derek. But it doesn't just happen magically. If you want both, you have to step up and work for it. Lord knows your father and I did," Carolyn added. Derek looked confused as he kept his eyes forward.
"When your sisters were younger, your dad wanted me to stay home, so I did. But it also meant he'd have to work longer hours at the store. He even thought about having the store be open 24 hours. I wouldn't have it, and he was already tired enough as it was. We made a choice, Derek. We decided we'd put our family first, and the money would come. I went back to work part-time at the hospital so we could all sit down for dinner together," Carolyn explained.
"Dad owned a convenience store, Mom. It's not exactly a dream job," Derek commented.
"No, it wasn't. But it was still something he thought he had to do. Not just for us. That store was your grandfather's; he just wanted to keep it alive. But that's beside the point, Derek," Carolyn said.
Derek sighed as he pulled into the fire lane at the airport between two other cars that had done the same. He put the car in park and just sat there for a minute, knowing his mother would have more to say.
"Derek, if you want to keep Addie like I know you do, you need to step up," Carolyn said. Derek looked down, knowing she was right.
"Otherwise, you'll lose her," Carolyn said before unbuckling her seatbelt and looking over at her son in the driver's seat. He looked up and turned toward her and nodded, saying he understood.
When he got home, he came inside and found Gina in the kitchen, making dinner. After greeting her, he looked around a bit before Gina gestured to Addison and Nate outside on the deck. He saw Addison sitting at the table with paperwork scrawled out in front of her while Nate played in his little sandbox. After hanging up his coat, he headed outside to see them.
"Daddy!" Nate exclaimed when he heard the door open, still sitting in his sandbox.
"Hey, buddy. Whatcha got there?" Derek asked, kneeling down next to him outside of the sandbox.
"Car!" Nate held up his small racecar toy to show him.
Derek remembered this toy, too; he bought a whole set of them last year, but Nate was too small at the time to play with them. At least too small to trust that he wouldn't just immediately stick it in his mouth. Thankfully, he was finally out of that phase. He remembered the set also came with a racetrack.
"I see that," Derek chuckled, ruffling up Nate's hair slightly. He looked back at Addison, sitting as she finished up some paperwork from the office.
"Why don't we get you cleaned up before dinner?" Derek suggested. Nate giggled and held his arms out for Derek to pick him up, the car still in one of his hands. He glanced back at Addison, who gave him a thankful smile back.
By the time Derek finished giving Nate his bath, dinner was ready. Gina said her goodbyes before Nate came back down and Addison set the table as they all sat down for dinner. After Derek told Nate he took Carolyn to the airport earlier, Nate had a thousand questions about airports and planes, which took over their entire dinner conversation. Not that either of them minded.
Derek and Addison then went through Nate's bedtime routine afterward and kissed him goodnight after he was almost asleep. They crept out of his room quietly before heading back to their bedroom. And Addison, again, was surprised that Derek was staying for the night. She figured he didn't get much work done today with his mom tagging along. But he followed her into the bedroom and then their bathroom to get ready for bed.
Neither of them said a word, which usually wouldn't be a problem. After almost 15 years of being married, there was something to be said about having a level of comfortable silence at times. But with how shaky they were in the last few months, it wasn't comfortable. It was awkward. They both climbed into bed and Derek gave Addison a perfunctory kiss goodnight and they both went down for the night.
They lay there silent on their separate sides of the bed, their eyes closed. But Addison's mind was racing. If there was ever an opportunity to talk, it was now. Or it would've been when they were brushing their teeth or changing into their pajamas. Even sometime during breakfast could've worked. It's not like Carolyn would've protested; she was the one who wanted them to talk more.
He'd only been back for two nights, and she'd done nothing with it. There were plenty of chances, and she almost said something every single time. But the words didn't come out. It was dark now, and it'd been almost an hour since they got into bed and turned off the lights. And she wasn't even sure if he was still awake. But if she didn't say it now, she might never say it.
"I miss you," Addison finally said.
A/N: But this chapter went back to being more about our favorite couple and how they've been on the rocks for the last few months. I've had this chapter ending in mind for a long time, and almost changed Addison's last line to something else, but I liked my original thought so there it is. When the next chapter comes out, just know you will learn what happens next in this scene, but it won't happen right away. I'll be playing around with the timeline for the last two chapters (yes, I only have 2 more chapters left), but I promise you will come across the outcome by the end of the next chapter (which I've had outlined for a long time as well).
Thanks to Stephanie (again and always :D) for help with figuring out the name of the other smaller hospital (Ojai Memorial). The patient this time is inspired by Maya from the season three finale. And the Amelia line, "You really did mean it when you said you'd crawl into bed with me," is a callback to a line from chapter 25. Other references include Carolyn talking about how she raised five doctors, which is from Grey's Anatomy 5x12. Until next time!