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S1E12- Down, but Not Out

"Down, but Not Out" appeared on the screen with the theme.

Grif: "(in the distance) Son of a… where'd he go? No! Don't kill me, I'm too good looking to die!"

"I wonder if we will ever see them," Pyrrha said.

"Probably not, since it's in a game." Ruby said.

Caboose: "Man… he is really kicking their asses."

Tucker: "How come I never get the fucking sniper rifle?"

Caboose: "(lowers the rifle) I'm really glad Tex is on our team and not theirs."

Tucker: "Sure makes things a lot easier on us."

Caboose: "Yeah. I think switching Tex for Church was a good trade."

"Wow, they do not care about each other at all." Blake said.

Tucker: "It definitely seems like your killing Church is starting to work out for us."

Caboose: "Ya know ya think so? You know, I was gonna say something but uh, well you know, uh… nah…"

Tucker: "Did Tex get in the base?

Caboose: (raises the rifle, sees Tex enter the base) Yeah."

Cut to the flag stand in the blue base as the Flag reappears

Freaky Game Voice: "Blue team, flag returned."

"What was that?" Weiss asked.

"The flag returned… Oh! It's capture the flag!" Ruby yelled.

"Wow I can't believe I didn't think of that before!" Yang said. "Capture the flag is a game type in some multiplayer games." She explained.

"I never took you for much of a gamer." Jaune said.

"What? Do I just not look like one?" Yang gestured to her body. "Never mind… I see your point. I don't like the stereotypes around games."

Tucker: "What the… who said that?"

Church: "(clears throat) Sorry, that was me. I uh, I guess I had something stuck in my throat. Your flag is back, by the way."

"Stuck in his throat? That makes no sense. He's a ghost, ghosts don't have throats." Weiss said.

Blake coughed and blushed. Her eyes quickly glanced over to her pile of smut books, one specifically titled. "Ghosts of love"

Caboose: "Hey… it's Church!"

Church: "Yeah, it's me. Hey Caboose."

Caboose: "Hey Church, what're you up to?"

Church: "Caboose, ah-huh-huh, I'm not really here to make small-talk, okay? How'd you guys manage to get your flag back?"

Tucker: "Wh, what? Oh, th, that flag? We've always had that ."

Church: "Tucker, who do you think you're trying to fool? Hey wait a second… Where's Tex?"

Tucker: "I'm not really sure, he said he was gonna go to the store, something about uh, Elbow Grease."

"They make a lot of callbacks in this show." Jaune commented. "I like it."

Church: "Oh great. This is so typical! What was the one thing I told you guys the last time I appeared?"

"Don't let Tex get involved." Ren said.

Caboose: "That Sidewinder is cold!?"

Church: (sigh) "what was the other one thing I told you?"

Tucker: "Not to let him get involved?"

Church: "Right. And what did you do?"

Tucker: "We let him get involved."

Church: "And not just a little involved, how involved?"

Caboose: "Very, very involved."

"Church is like their mom." Yang said laughing.

"Is this how your dad lectured you two?" Jaune asked.

Ruby shrugged, "Sometimes."

Cut to Tex in the red base

Sarge: "(emerging from the left) Freeze."

Lopez emerges from the right, pinning Tex

Sarge: "Drop your weapon."

Tex: (drops the gun) "Hey buddy."

Sarge: "What?" He said harshly.

Tex: "You really better hope the first one knocks me out."

"He sounds like a badass." Yang said, smiling.

Sarge hits Tex with the butt end of his shotgun, conveniently knocking Tex out.

Cut to Grif on the red base.

Grif: "Ow, what the… My freakin' head. Jesus."

"They keep saying Jesus, I wonder what that curse word means." Yang wondered out loud.

"Why? It's a curse word." Weiss asked.

"Yeah, but it's interesting. It's from another uni-" Yang started.

"How come you and everyone else here just instantly believed it was from another universe! You believe hackers over common sense!" Weiss yelled.

"Excuse me but uh, I don't believe it's from another universe." Pyrrha said, raising a hand.

"Neither do I." Blake said.

"Nor do I, but… it does use a lot of terminology that is alien to us. And not to mention the fact that me and you can't find anything on Red Vs Blue or the game it's made in." Ren said to Weiss.

"So that must mean it's from another universe." Ruby explained.

"Come on! Yang you're smarter than this, do you think it's from another universe?" Weiss asked.

"It's absolutely from another universe because it annoys you." Yang said.

"What?" Weiss asked, confused.

"She is saying it's from another universe to annoy you." Ren whispered.

"Ha! See so only Ruby-"

"The text said it was from another universe and why would the text lie?" Nora said.

"Only Ruby and Nora-"

"Actually I think it would be pretty cool if it was from another universe." Jaune said.

"Ugh Fine! Just play the episode." Weiss said angrily.

Simmons: "(stands up from tending to Donut) He's hurt, Grif. He'll make it, but we need to get him some help fast."

Grif: "Yeah, yeah hold on one second. What happened here? W- First Donut's head exploded, and then you fainted, and then some black thing showed up and started-"

Simmons: "Whoa, whoa, whoa, wait. I did not faint, something knocked me out."

"Real soldiers get Knocked out." Nora laughed. "Simmons fainted."

Grif: "Okay fine, keep lying to yourself. Whatever helps you sleep at night."

Simmons: "Man, just go find Sarge, we need to get Donut outta here."

Grif: "Yeah sure, oh, and uh, I'm fine by the way, thanks for asking." (runs down the ramp)

Simmons: "Whatever, no one likes you anyway."

"That is an incredibly horrible thing to say." Pyrrha frowned.

Cut to Caboose, looking through the sniper rifle at Grif entering the red base

Caboose: "Yep, he's definitely captured… Or dead… Captured or dead.… (inhales sharply) Or captured and dead!"

Church: "Oh, well that's just perfect!"

"He even acts like dad! Sarcastic when he's angry and in the exact same tone." Yang said, amazed.

"It has to be dad from another universe! I know some voices sound alike but it is exactly the same." Ruby explained.

"If the other universe theory is correct then it could just be that he is a voice actor." Ren said.

"That's a good point Ren and it made me think of something." Yang said grinning. "Weiss… what's your theory? Where did this show come from and why was it shown to us?"

"Well it came from Hackers. As for why… I don't know but you don't know why either!" Weiss shot back.

"Maybe it's just like the text said. It's their favorite show so they showed it to us." Ren contemplated.

"Whatever, the show can't get much worse. Let's just keep watching. (Whispers) would rather do this than study anyway." Weiss

mumbled.

Tucker: "What? What is your problem? Why do you even care if he's captured, I thought you hated that guy anyway, for stealing your girlfriend?"

Church: "I never said I hated Tex. I just said that she was the reason why we never got married."

Caboose: "She?"

"What?" Ruby, Weiss, Blake, and Jaune said at the same time.

"Jinx!" Nora called out.

"Not now Nora." Ren said, kindly shutting her up.

Cut to inside the red base, with everyone but Donut present

Simmons: "Sarge, we need to get Donut air-lifted outta here."

Sarge: "Could you put that in a memo, and entitle it 'Shit I already know!' Get on the horn with Command! Well, look who's up. Rise 'n' shine, buttercup."

Tex is standing, sparks flying from the right shoulder, jerking it back

Tex: "(now sounding like a girl) Oh great… you broke my voice filter. You cock biting fucktards!"

"Finally! A female character!" Weiss said happily.

"And she's tough!" Yang said happily.

Grif: "Ah-ha! I knew it! Only a chick could give me a headache this big!"

Jaune, Yang, Ruby, and Ren started laughing.

"That was a little sexist." Weiss said.

"Oh calm down!" Yang rolled her eyes. "There's a time and place for jokes that are a little offensive, as long as they have taste."

"Well, I guess you're right." Weiss mumbled.

"What was that?" Blake asked, a little surprised.

"What! I understand the joke, jokes like that would never fly on Atlas tv, everything was so… formal." Weiss complained. "But this show kind of over does the offensive jokes."

"I think they found a great balance." Jaune said. "At first this show seemed like it would just be stupid dick jokes but so far it's been clever."

"I agree." Pyrrha said.

"I still just love how it's in a game!" Ruby shouted.

"So let's keep watching! I haven't had any good shows to watch for a while and I'm still waiting on Game of Kings season 8" Yang said. "Wonder if it'll be any good?"

Tex: "… What's the matter, you never seen a girl before? How long have you guys been out here" she said as the screen turned black.

"Well that's all the characters from the intro." Ren said. "Start the next one." Ruby ordered.

New AN: Wow, I originally wrote this chapter before GoT season 8. What a trainwreck of a season. HotD is really good though, love it. I also recently listened to all of the Asoiaf audiobooks. Amazing series, including A Knight of the Seven Kingdoms and the other two lore books.