DISCLAIMER:
Total Drama belongs to Fresh TV and their creators. I don't own anything from the properties used in this fic
I love Ridonc and Roll
Last time on the Ridonculous race, our teams got skewered in China. Some barfed, others were poisoned, and some others couldn't pull a cart. But not all was bad, the best-dressed team, the fashion bloggers, came in first, and the absolutely worst-dressed team, the Larpers, came in last. But maybe magic exists because it was a non-elimination round. Who am I fooling, t was probably a coincidence.
Twelve proud teams remain. Time to send one of them packing because this is The Ridonculous race.
Yesterday's chill zone is today's starting line. The teams will depart in the order they finished yesterday. After a good night of sleep, the real reality TV Pros were in 2nd place. In front of them, Tom wasn't wearing his fez anymore.
"Dude, what happened to your cool hat?" asked Tyler, scratching his head.
"Ohoho, I left it with my luggage," replied Tom, waving his hand. "You were right, a race filled with dangerous challenges isn't the best place for a nice accessory."
"Or for your hair. Just look at mine," said Jen, touching her hair.
LeShawna chuckled. "C'mon girl, don't exaggerate. Your hair looks awesome."
"Oh, thanks, but I assure you it's like dry and greasy right now. Usually, I only wash it in the salon, but I don't have time during the race," Jen explained in a sad tone. "And the swimming challenges don't help either."
"For swimming in the sea, you can use a hair mask made of lukewarm honey and buttermilk. That should help make it shiny again," said LeShawna, smiling.
Jen's eyes sparkled. "Really? Let me take note."
"Yes, one of my girls who love surfing gave me that tip years ago and is a real lifesaver," the sista winked confidently.
"I'll try it tonight," said Jen, putting a note in her agenda.
"Please, Fashion bloggers, take the first tip from the Don Box," said Don, who was about to start the leg.
"It seems it's time to go," said Tom, smiling excitedly.
"See you later," said Jen waving at the TV Pros.
LeShawna and Tyler waved back as the Genius wrote furiously in their notebooks.
After a moment, the Real Reality TV Pros advanced to the front of the line. The sista with a 'tude pressed the Don box and got their ticket.
"Go to Beijing airport and fly to Oulu, Finland. Once you arrive, you must travel to the famous spa of Hirsimökki to retrieve the next travel tip," said LeShawna, a wide grin appearing on her face. "Yeah Babe, a spa! That's what momma needed!"
"Finland?" asked Tyler rubbing his chin.
LeShawna nodded. "One of those countries in northern Europe, next to Sweden."
Tyler blinked, confused.
"You know lots of heavy metal bands, saunas, snow?"
Tyler looked away, scratching his head.
"The happiest country in the world?"
"Isn't Canada the happiest country in the world?" asked Tyler, raising an eyebrow.
LeShawna groaned, "Just follow me."
Team confessional: Morale compass analysis
"Subject T and L are establishing a propitious relationship with the Adversity Twins and the Fashion bloggers. Why?" said Ellody, scratching her head with her pencil.
"Those teams are in the lower middle of the table, I don't perceive any benefit T & L can get from succoring such elements," Mary adjusted her glasses.
Ellody bit her pencil. "Maybe we need to approach from a different angle. Maybe those teams approached T & L instead of T & L making the first movement."
"Sounds plausible, but the chances 2 different teams come closer to one of the most ruthless teams in the competition at the same time is scarce," said Mary, nodding. "We need more data."
"Agreed, we can't formulate a thesis with only these elements," said Ellody, also nodding.
Mary then smirked. "And also answering T question, Canada is ranked 13th in the list of happiest countries to live in. Not a bad result."
"The list includes 137 countries, so it's a good result," added Ellody, both Genius smiling.
Xxxxxx
Team confessional: FINLAND!
"It seems after our small mishap in China, we got lucky with the next country," said Leonard, smirking. "It seems my MAGIC is returning."
"I'm not that sure," said Tammy rubbing her chin. "Finland is good, but not the best for us."
Leonard's eyes widened. "But you're Scandinavian. You should be more powerful over there!"
"Oh no, My grandmother was Norwegian, and we're completely different from the Finnish people, even their language is pretty different. We're more like rivals," said Tammy nodding. "But I learned a lot about Finland and their culture for the same reason, so we will be fine. Maybe."
"Yikes! Why can we never have any advantage in this game?" said Leonard snapping his fingers.
The 12 teams tried to get a taxi, but in China was basically impossible.
"It seems I need to stop the taxis Tyler-style," said the jock, cracking his knuckles.
"NO JUMPING in front of the cars!" shouted LeShawna, holding his arm. "Let me take care."
LeShawna raised her hands and waved at the taxis, but they kept ignoring her time and again.
"I think it's Tyler time after all," said the jock, smirking.
Luckily for LeShawna (and Tyler) someone called them.
"HEY! Do you, ehm, want a lift?" said Jay, blushing.
"I don't… woah!" Tyler hesitated, but LeShawna pulled him and entered the twins' taxi.
The sista gave the twins a fist pump, making them wince in pain. "Thanks boys, if we didn't find a taxi in one more minute, this guy would have jumped in front of one."
"It worked in Paris," said Tyler, crossing his arms.
"No, it didn't!" replied LeShawna glaring at her teammate.
"Excuse us…" said Mickey in a low voice.
To his surprise, Tyler and LeShawna stopped talking and turned to face the twins.
"You see… my brother and I were wondering if, you know … we could…"
"Form an alliance … if you want … sorry it's an awful idea," Mickey finished Jay's sentence. Both brothers looked at the taxi's floor, not expecting an answer.
LeShawna looked at Tyler, the jock's eyes were sparkling, and he nodded enthusiastically.
"We're flattered, but I don't think an alliance really works in this show," said LeShawna, raising an eyebrow. "We may be penalized if we help each other during the challenges."
"B-But we can help each other before the challenge, sharing taxis or helping each other with directions," said Jay, fidgeting with his fingers.
Mickey raised a finger. "Or helping each other in the challenge, maybe not directly, but we can cheer and share tips."
"C'mon LeShawna, look at them. They need all the help they can get," said Tyler, winking, not realizing he was insulting the brothers.
"Please?" asked the twins.
"Let's do it Lesh!" shouted Tyler.
The twins keep watching her with wide eyes.
"There is no damage doing this, and we will be an extreme alliance," said Tyler smiling.
"Ok, let's give it a try," said the sista with a 'tude, "But stop talking."
Jay sighed sadly. "Ok, we expected that."
"But if you change your mind, we're open to talking about it again," said Mickey making a strained smile.
"Lesh," Tyler whispered, but as usual, it was loud enough for everyone to hear. "Correct me if I'm wrong, but I thought we agreed to accept their proposal."
LeShawna glared at the three. "I SAID, LET'S GIVE IT A TRY!"
The twins' eyes widened, and goofy smiles appeared on their faces.
"YEAHHH!" shouted Mickey raising both arms.
"Thank you!" Jay weakly held LeShawna's hand. "I assure you won't regret this."
However LeShawna was already starting to regret this.
Team confessional: Accepting too fast
"You know boy, I'm not sure it's a good idea to make an alliance in this show," said LeShawana, her arms crossed.
"C'mon Lesh, It's not bad having some friends," said Tyler, winking. "And if we find a hard challenge, they can always give us a hand."
LeShawna sighed. "I don't know, they seem so fragile. They make Gwen's bubble friend look like Terry Crews."
"Hahaha, it's not that bad," said Tyler chuckling.
"Tyler, one of them got a leg cramp while exiting the taxi," said LeShawna, raising an eyebrow.
Team confessional: We're safe now?
"I can't believe they accepted to be in our alliance," said Jay rubbing his chin.
"Yeah, it's like a dream," Mickey raised his arms enthusiastically.
Jay shook his head. "Yes, which is why I feel a bit anxious. I'm not used to things going so smoothly."
"You're right, it feels a bit eerie," said Mickey, feeling a chill down his spine, which made him shudder.
"And my leg still hurts after the cramp I got getting off the taxi," said Jay rubbing his leg.
All the teams boarded the same plane toward Finland, arriving some hours later in Oulu. The TV Pros were the first team to arrive at Hirsimökki, LeShawna pressing the Don Box and getting the ticket.
"All In: Finnish spa day: teams have to sit in a dry sauna fully clothed at the highest heat for 10 minutes. Each spa hut has enough room for two teams, and the 10-minute timer doesn't start until both teams have crammed inside. After the sauna, get your tip from the next Don Box by crossing the semi-frozen river," LeShawna sighed.
"Oh YEAH! An extreme sauna challenge!" said Tyler, fist-pumping.
"Oh man, I know I'm gonna hate this," said LeShawna sighing.
Tyler put his arm across her shoulder. "C'mon Lesh, it will be fine, it's us and another team sitting in a sauna,it can't be that bad." He then rubbed his chin. "Should we wait for the twins?"
"I don't think so, there is nothing we can do while in the sauna, and we would only lose our lead while waiting for them."
"Ok, then let's wait for the next team," the jock told his teammate, winking. "And stop worrying. We'll be out before you realize it. It's not like you getting worried about a sauna."
"Hehehe, I guess you're right. This isn't that bad," said the sista smiling. "I hope the other team isn't the ice dancers."
"Don't worry, I'm sure it won't be the ice dancers," said Tyler making a wide smile.
The Real Reality TV Pros entered their sauna, waiting for the next team.
After some minutes, the other team entered, the door closed, and the 10 minutes started. However, LeShawna wasn't happy with the team that went inside with them.
"See! I told you they won't be the ice dancers," said Tyler giving her a thumbs up
However, the sista began to think being with the silver winners would be better.
"Greetings unbeliever, it seems our fates crossed once again," said Leonard, smiling while Tammy played the ocarina.
"Hello, mage," said Tyler, waving.
Leonard frowned. "NO! I was talking to the unbeliever, not you."
"I'm not an unbeliever?" asked Tyler, raising an eyebrow.
"Yes, you're," replied LeShawna rolling her eyes.
"No he isn't. You, my good friend, still have the soul of a child," said Leonard stroking his fake beard.
Tammy nodded. "By the way, greetings Tyler."
"Hello," said Tyler, waving again.
"To be together under the blessing of Surtr, that this time came from the north," said Leonard in a deep voice.
"Ugh! It's already getting pretty hot. Can you at least stop talking nonsense while we're in here?" asked LeShawna glaring at them.
Leonard laughed. "This sauna isn't an issue for us. Just look at this. Calidum circlum protegerum!"
Tammy played a different tune and…
"Nothing happened," said LeShawna, deadpanning at them.
"HA! I just used protection against heat. Now Tammy and I are immune to the hazardous heat of this torture chamber," said Leonard, chuckling evilly.
Tyler's eyes widened. "Torture chamber? I thought this was a sauna!"
LeShawna groaned. Now she missed the Ice dancers. This should be the worst sauna room in the competition.
But LeShawna ignored that all the teams were suffering in one way or another, well, almost all.
The adversity twins shared the sauna with the Genius. The girls were disheveled and covered in sweat. Both took off their sweaters, and Ellody was trying to clean her glasses.
"Oh, this is futile," said Ellody, groaning as her glasses misted again.
"The amount of water steam around us is too high. There is no way to defog our glasses until we get out of here," said Mary, sighing.
Ellody shook her head. "I underestimated how exhausting staying inside a small thermally elevated space would be."
"Yes, it's probably pretty uncomfortable," said Jay, smiling.
The Genius squinted their eyes while looking at the twins.
"Excuse me, it's maybe because I'm a myopic, but are you copacetic in these circumstances?" asked Mary, raising an eyebrow.
"I'm not sure what you mean by that," asked Mickey, rubbing his arm. "But yes, we're fine right now."
"We suffer from a rare condition named temperature dyslexia," said Jay, nodding.
Ellody's eyes widened. "Temperature Dyslexia? Really? That's an uncommon pathology- I only have read about that in specialized books."
"Oh you know it? Hahaha I didn't expect that. Most people have never heard about it," said Mickey, chuckling. "But yes, we can't feel heat or cold, so we're just fine in this challenge."
"Ellody, this is a chance of a lifetime. We need to research their condition," whispered Mary.
"I know, but I can't write without my glasses," said Ellody in a sad tone.
"Oh, me too," replied Mary, sighing.
While the Genius regretted their lost chance, the Police cadets and the step brothers were frowning in the sauna. Only Sanders didn't look angry.
"I'm getting tired of those guys' attitude," MacArthur told Sanders. "I think they need a lesson, MacArthur style."
"Don't let the heat go to your head. They probably are just suffering from the heat, just like you," whispered Sanders in a harsh tone.
However, MacArthur ignored her. "HEY you!" she told Lorenzo. "What's your problem?"
"My problem? My problem is to be seated next to this hot-aired ballon," said Lorenzo, rolling his eyes. "It's bad enough to be in a hot sauna to have to be with him."
"Oh yeah? My problem is to be seated next to you. You're sweating so much that your sweat is almost touching my leg," said Chet, glaring at his brother.
Lorenzo raised his voice. "Oh yeah? You're so soaked that it seems an elephant sprayed you before entering?"
"Really because you…"
"ENOUGH!" shouted MacArthur, her skin a bit pinkish. "You, the fat one! Sit in that corner," said the police cadet.
Chet frowned, offended. "Hey, you can't…"
"NOW!" shouted the chubby Police cadet.
The cadets sat in the middle of the room while Chet ran to the other side. The stepbrothers crossed their arms and glared at each other.
"Much better," said MacArthur, smirking. "Well, that helped to waste some minutes. How much time is left?"
"6 minutes," replied Sanders in a tired tone.
"Damn it," said MacArthur fanning herself with her cap.
The fourth room had the sisters and the Fashion bloggers. The four seemed tired and disheveled.
"Buhuhu, we're covered in sweat stains. And this was one of my favorite shirts," said Tom, crying.
"This is like the worst challenge ever," said Jen, sniffing.
Emma rolled her eyes. "Oh C'mon, stop whining. It's just some hot steam. Swimming with sharks is a lot worse."
"But sweat can discolor my shirt and weak the fabric," Tom lowered his head. "There should be a law forbidding entering a sauna wearing clothes."
"The producers are heartless," said Jen, raising a hand.
"NO, THEY AREN'T! It's just a stupid sauna," growled Emma, standing up in a second, making Tom and Jen cower in fear.
Kitty pulled her sister's sleeve. "Emma, calm down. There is no need to shout like that."
"Ugh," Emma groaned and sat down. "Sorry, I guess the heat is getting me."
"No problem," said Tom, relaxing a bit.
Jen nodded. "It's a pretty harsh challenge."
"Yes, and I would be a lot more relaxed if SOMEONE took the race more seriously," said Emma, giving a dirty look at her sister.
"Here we go again," muttered Kitty.
Emma glared at Kitty. "See, that's what I'm saying. You should put your back into it, but instead, you're always making excuses and playing during every challenge. You aren't a kid anymore, and it was your idea to enter the show, so you need to start being responsible for your acts. I can't carry us all the time because the moment I fail…"
Tom and Jen looked at each other nervously, not expecting the scene unfolding before them. They felt terrible for the younger sister, but they could do nothing to help her.
As Kitty suffered, in the next sauna, the atmosphere was pretty heavy, with the ice dancers and Taylor looking down on each other.
"Why are ice dancing clothes so well insulated," said Jacques, dripping sweat. He then looked at rock rock. "You know, your good luck charm must be broken."
"Perhaps, or not, our main competitors are those spoiled gals. The heat will destroy them," said Joseé, smiling.
Taylor, also covered in sweat and with her makeup running through her face, glared at the ice dancers. "Ha, you may beat this old hag, but there is no way two people dressed like that can beat me."
"Dressed like that?" said Jacques, astonished.
"These are Olympic-level designs, but I couldn't expect a brat would know about true fashion," said Joseé, forcing a laugh.
Taylor scoffed. "Ple-e-ease, two tones of pink is overkill. And the vests are so *gag*" the brunette girl mimicked as if she was throwing up. "I would never let anyone see me wearing those, much less on international tv."
"Because it's better to let people see you with those high-knee boots," said Jacques rolling his eyes. "Those are sooo 2008."
"That's not true," Taylor gasped. "Mom, say something!"
But to Taylor and the Ice Dancers' surprise, Kelly was leaning on her seat, resting with a handkerchief over her eyes. She didn't seem affected by the heat.
"Sorry dear, my trainer told me it's better to be calm in the sauna and talk as little as possible inside it. So if you don't mind. I'll be relaxing while you play with your new friends," said Kelly, ignoring the bickering.
"We aren't her friends!" Shouted both Ice dancers.
"And I mind it, stop lazing around and help me," shouted Taylor, crossing her arms.
Kelly smirked. "Well, too bad because I don't care. Try to fix it yourself for once until the sauna time is over…"
"MOM!"
"Or forget about that new skirt you wanted," said Kelly in an emotionless tone.
Taylor sniffed. "You're a monster."
The ice dancers looked at each other. Kelly's answer meant that they had won, no? But for some reason, they didn't feel like the winners.
In the last room, the surfer dudes and Father and Son were getting along much better than the other teams, well, kinda.
"And then we went off the road, and the truck sank into the sea. It was pretty crazy," said Geoff, laughing loudly.
"And Geoff's girlfriend said it was the moose's fault!" said Brody, trying to imitate the girl's voice.
Junior laughed loudly, but Dwayne was a bit more nervous.
"Guys, maybe it's the heat, but I think some of those stunts are a little dangerous," said Dwayne, who looked about to melt. "And I'm worried this little man here will try to imitate them."
"Dad! I'm not a kid anymore. I'm already 13!" said Junior crossing his arms.
Geoff and Brody laughed loudly, making the younger Dwayne look sadly at the ground.
"Hahaha, dude, you're 13 and are already in your first reality show? You're awesome," said Geoff, winking. This made Junior expression turn into a big smile.
"Totally, When I was 13 years old, I was at home, learning how to surf and smoking my first joint," said Brody, making a nostalgic smile.
Junior eyes widened. "Really!"
"Hahaha, of course not. Brody here is joking. Right?" Dwayne forgot about the heat and covered his son's ears in a futile attempt to make him stop listening to the surfer dudes.
"Your dad is right. You shouldn't start smoking until you're at least 17," said Geoff, nodding. "this guy did it because he has too much energy and too few brain cells," Geoff gave Brody a fist bump.
Brody nodded. "What can I say? I'm an action guy, bump."
Junior groaned as Dwayne tried to dry the sweat off his forehead.
"But don't worry, once you're 17, call me if you're still curious about this. We can have a party, and I can get some quality weed," said Geoff, winking. "Let me write you my personal number."
"T-That's not…"
"Awesome! Thanks man," said Junior, his eyes sparkling.
Dwayne groaned, but luck was on his side.
Geoff was trying to write on a piece of paper over his leg, but the paper was soaked in sweat, and he couldn't write on it.
"It seems I can't write my number," said Geoff scratching his head. "Let's talk about it later."
"Yes, yes, let's talk later," said Dwayne in a loud tone. He didn't have any intention of talking about this anymore. "Anyway, did any of you play curling?"
"Dad no," said Junior embarrassed.
Brody tilted his head. "No, What's curling?"
"Hahaha, youngsters these days," Dwayne chuckled and cleared his throat. "Curling is an Olympic ice sport…"
Junior hid his face in embarrassment as his Dad continued. Geoff and Brody were quite immersed in the conversation.
There were a few minutes left in the first room, but the four contestants looked awful. LeShawna's hair was a disheveled afro, and her armpits and the neck of her shirt had sweat stains. Tyler was patting with his tongue hanging out, disheveled hair, and his shirt soaked in sweat.
However, the Larpers didn't look any better. Tammy unbraided her hair, and her skin was pink colored. Leonard was in worse shape. He had his hat next to him, his short frizzy hair dripping sweat. His robe was covered in sweat stains, but he was smiling.
"… And then the Salamanders began to cast Wall of fire to protect the Elemental evil, the heat was so intense it ignored our protection spells," said Tammy, trying her best to ignore the heat and failing miserably.
LeShawna sighed. "Can you stop with your role-play anecdotes? It's tiring, and you have been talking about them for ages," said LeShawna, huffing.
"Actually, it's been only 8 minutes," said Tyler, smiling.
"Really, because it felt longer," LeShawna dried her forehead, trying to ignore the larpers.
"Hehehe, I know you are envious of our heat protection magic, eh, unbeliever?" said Leonard, forcing a smile.
"Boy, Did the heat drive you crazy? What protection? You seem about to melt," said LeShawna, shaking her head.
Leonard made an effort to straighten up. "Nonsense, we're completely fine even while wearing this cotton robe. Not like you who seems about to faint."
"Wow, magic seems so practical," said Tyler, smirking.
"Hohoho, at last you realize it," said Tammy, putting her chest out proudly.
LeShawna rolled her eyes. "Ty, don't encourage them."
"But if your magic is so useful, why did you never win a leg?" asked Tyler, scratching his head.
Leonard and Tammy's jaws dropped while LeShawna chuckled.
"That's because…" Leonard clenched his fist and glared at LeShawna. "LeShawna, don't believe in my magic."
Tammy and Tyler gasped.
"Excuse me?" asked LeShawna, raising an eyebrow.
"LeShawna, that's mean. Why don't you believe in their magic?" asked Tyler, squizzing his headband again.
LeShawna sighed. "Why? Because magic doesn't exist! It's just some mirror plays and sleight of hands."
"That's not true. Magic exists!" shouted Leonard, pointing at LeShawna.
"Prove it," Leshawna looked into Leonard's eyes, frowning.
Tammy raised a hand. "He can't as long as you don't believe in his magic."
"That's the silliest thing I ever hear," LeShawna groaned, as if the heat wasn't enough, she also needed to endure this foolishness.
"See, I can't use my magic like that," said Leonard crossing his arms.
Tyler looked at his teammate with a curious smile. "C'mon Lesh, try believing a little."
Leonard and Tammy also looked at her with expectation.
"Ok, ok, I believe you. You can use magic. Now what?" said LeShawna sighing, it was too hot in there, and she didn't want to argue.
Tyler, Leonard, and Tammy made a tired cheer, Leonard clearing his throat.
"Now I'll use my magic to lower the room temperature. Observe," Leonard took out his magic wand and began to wave it.
"Breath of Ymir, feather of snow, Lower the room temperature in a single blow," Leonard did the incantation and began to blow.
And blow.
And blow.
Tyler and Tammy looked at him with excitement while Leshawna raised an eyebrow.
And suddenly, a bell rang. The challenge has ended.
"Ok, time is over. It seems we'll have to see your magic on another occasion," said LeShawna pulling Tyler. "See ya."
The Real Reality TV Pros ran outside the sauna and toward the frozen river.
"Eh! Not so fast," shouted Leonard, he and Tammy following them.
But as soon as the larpers left the room, they fell flat on the snow.
"Tammy, I can't feel my legs," said Leonard, too tired to follow the Tv Pros.
"What a coincidence, me too," said Tammy, sighing. "Let's take a small break before continuing the race."
It seemed the Larpers magic wasn't working as intended.
Team confessional: Not a magical moment.
"Oh, it was such a shame. They were about to cast some real magic," said Tyler, snapping his fingers.
"Yes, of course," LeShawna sighed and crossed her arms.
Tyler looked at her with wide eyes. "LeShawna, what are you saying? You promised to believe in their magic."
"Yes, I did."
"Because you sounded like you don't believe their magic is real." Tyler squinted his eyes at her.
"Really?" LeSahwna raised an eyebrow.
"YES! And if you don't believe, they can't use magic!"
LeShawna rolled her eyes. "Don't worry, I believe in them."
"Then all it's ok," said Tyler, nodding happily as LeShawna tried to ignore him.
Team confessional: Casting time is a pain.
"Leonard, what happened?" asked Tammy, looking worriedly at the wizard.
"The spell I was casting took too long. If we only had 1 more minute," said Leonard, sighing.
Tammy nodded. "Don't worry. Next time, you'll succeed."
"Oh yes, and I'll make that unbeliever eat her words," said Leonard laughing evilly. Tammy then began to laugh like him. "Sadly, I don't have the stamina to try again."
"I know, I'm also tired," said Tammy, resting on the chair and whistling.
The adrenaline helped the former Total drama contestants arrive at the river, but soon they began to shiver.
"Why it's so cold out here? I can't believe it became so cold in 10 minutes," said Tyler, rubbing his arms.
"I-It's because we went out of the sauna, so now the weather feels colder than before," said LeShawna, frowning.
"Exactly, that's because the thermoreceptors in our skin get used to the sauna temperature, so our skin sends a signal to our brain noticing the drop in temperature," said Ellody, also shaking.
Mary snorted. "It's the way the epidermis regulates our body temperature. It seems we need to index a new heat index for this situation."
Mary and Ellody laughed at their 'joke' while LeShawna tried to ignore them.
"Anyway, how do we cross this one?" asked LeShawna, looking at the frozen river.
"That's easy," Tyler then dived into the river, LeShawna looking at him wide-eyed.
The jock emerged, his teeth chattering. "I-It's a b-bit cold, but w-we can do it."
"Ok, here goes nothing," LeShawna jumped on the water, pinching her nose. Once in the water, her teeth were also chattering. "I-I think this was a b-bad idea."
"D-Don't worry, swimming a little will warm us," said Tyler, doing his best to swim to the other side.
More teams arrived at the river, avoiding the fallen larpers. The adversity twins, the police cadets, and the stepbrother jumped into the water. While the Genius made some calculations to navigate using a piece of ice.
"Hey, be careful dumb head, you splashed icy water on my face," said Chet, glaring at his brother.
"Yeah? Well maybe you shouldn't be in the way of the water I was splashing," said Lorenzo, glaring at his brother.
MacArthur glared at them. "Stop whining! If you want to fight, do it like men, not like cheerleaders."
"Hahaha, she called you cheerleader," said Lorenzo, laughing.
"Are you deaf, he called YOU a cheerleader," replied Chet, splashing water at his brother. "And it's because you're always whining.
"No, he called you because you're the whiner!"
"YOU'RE THE WHINER!"
"NOT YOU!"
The stepbrothers began to slap each other, splashing icy water everywhere,
"Do you have to provoke them like that?" asked Sanders, swimming next to MacArthur.
"Hahaha, no, I didn't have to, but I'm glad I did," said the chubbier cadet, chuckling.
LeShawna and Tyler were the first to arrive at the other side of the river, pressing the Don box's button.
"Go to downtown Oulu and get ready to air out on your rock," read LeShawna, tilting her head.
"Look, taxis are waiting for us," said Tyler, pulling his teammate.
They got some towels and entered the taxi, but before it started, Tyler shouted.
"WAIT A MINUTE!" said the jock.
LeShawna raised an eyebrow as his companion opened the taxi's door, letting the Adversity twins enter.
"Hello alliancemates," said Tyler, winking. "You surely arrive just in time."
"Hahaha, thanks," said Jay, he and his brother looking a bit embarrassed. "But there was no need for you to wait for us."
LeShawna's frown turned into a resigned smile. "Don't overthink about it. It's just how this boy works."
"Now we just need to win first and second place. This will be AWESOME!" shouted Tyler, making LeShawna and the twins laugh, even if the brothers sounded a bit more nervous.
After a short journey, both teams arrived downtown. The place was filled with punks and goths looking at a large, empty stage with speakers and an electronic board. Next to the backstage entrance was the don box.
"This place is wicked!" said Tyler, making a huge grin.
"Y-Yes, it is," said Jay, rubbing his arm.
"I just hope we don't have to do what I fear we have to do," said Mickey, biting his nails.
Jay sighed. "You know it's exactly what we will have to do."
LeShawna ignored them and took the next travel tip.
"Botch or Watch: Heavy Air Trip. Teams must battle it out in Finland national sport: Air guitar. Whoever didn't pull the rickshaw in Beijing must play it out. Their performances will be judged by an applause meter, get the crowd into a maximum frenzy, and rock on over the Chill Zone. Bottom out, and it's off to the back of the line to try again," the sista raised an eyebrow. "It's air guitar a sport?"
"Oh no!" shouted Mickey covering his face.
Tyler cracked his knuckles. "We have this in our bag."
Both teams went backstage. Tyler would go first, while Mickey would go second. The younger twin seemed terrified. LeShawna looked at him, sighing.
"I guess it's time to act like an ally," said the sista, smiling. "So, what's your problem? Stage fright?"
"A… A little…" Mickey made a strained smile. "I don't know how to rock."
LeShawna smiled. "Don't worry, you don't need to rock."
"B-But I…"
"Milton, you just need to go out there and have fun. As long as you do your best, you'll nail it," said LeShawna, winking.
"My name is Mickey…," said the twin rubbing his arm.
"And in the same way you have the confidence to correct me when I call you a wrong name, you can go out there and rock this challenge," said Leshawna patting his arm.
Jay nodded. "She's right, just be yourself, Mickey, because you're the best."
"OK, I GOT THIS!" shouted Mickey, raising both arms.
As Mickey waited for his turn, Jay bowed to LeShawna.
"Thanks for helping us. Mickey is always nervous about getting on stage after a tree-related injury," said Jay, smiling.
"Don't worry boy, we're allies," LeShawna winked, ignoring what the twin said about tree-related injuries.
Jay nodded. "And the idea of calling Mickey the wrong name to give him confidence was awesome. You Pros are really a league over us."
LeShawna chuckled, looking nervous at the camera.
Solo confessional
"I don't have the heart to tell him I actually don't remember their names," said LeShawna chuckling nervously. "I need to ask Tyler the name of the one without the helmet."
While this happened, Tyler was rocking on the stage, the public began to warm to his performance and cheer. Tyler jumped around and played his air guitar as if he was an Australian rocker, but sadly he stumbled on one of the speaker's cables and crashed face-first against a speaker, failing his attempt.
"Ouch," said Mickey, looking nervously at Tyler. "Are you ok?"
Tyler's face was red-colored, and his hair was disheveled, but he made a huge grin. "Yes, it wasn't that bad."
"B-But you just failed the challenged," said Mickey, biting his nails.
"Dude, I just failed the first time. I'll nail it on the next one," Tyler offered him a fist bump. "Don't be afraid of failing, go out there and have fun."
Mickey's jaw dropped, but he recovered his composure in a second, his eyes filled with confidence. He then bumped Tyler's fist. "I can do it!"
"You got this!" shouted Tyler, who then looked at his fist. "Wow, I think Beth hits harder than him."
"Hahaha, what happened out there?" asked LeShawna, raising an eyebrow. "Did you trip on your own feet?"
Tyler shrugged. "No, I think it was a power cable, I was air guitaring with all my might and forgot about looking to the ground. At least I can try again after the Genius."
The sista with a 'tude shook her head and pointed at the other teams waiting to perform.
"Wow, almost everyone is here. Oh boy, the performances will be awesome!" shouted Tyler enthusiastically.
"I hope they don't, or we'll be packing by the end of the day," said LeShawna, chuckling.
The jock blushed. "Oh, yes, that's true."
As they talked, Mickey was on the stage. He was nervous, but all the cheering and support from his brother and friends were on his mind. The usually shy boy was totally focused.
"Icandoit, Icandoit, Icandoit…" he repeated, waiting for the music to start.
Then the challenge started, and Mickey began to jump and rock around. He wasn't good, but he wasn't bad either, however he was passionate, moving and playing as if he really had a guitar, sliding and jumping around as much as his weak body let him.
And that connected with the audience, who, after some hesitation, began to cheer. The twin seemed about to faint, but he somehow was still standing and rocking, his moves so ethereal that the public began to cheer him more and more. Mickey didn't realize when the meter was filled and he had completed the challenge.
"Mickey you did it," said Jay, running and hugging his brother.
"I did?" said Mickey, falling in his brother's arms. "That's great because I can't feel my legs."
The adversity twins walked toward the chill zone where Don received them.
"And so we have the winners of this round. And in an event I never considered possible, the Adversity twins took the first place," said Don opening his arms. "If these two could do it, the rest of the teams will be fine… probably."
LeShawna and Tyler went to the bottom of the queue, behind another six teams.
"It was awesome! That Mickey really knows how to rock," said Tyler smiling.
"I just hope we aren't eliminated in this one, or I'll feel like an idiot," said LeShawna, laughing nervously.
The Real Reality TV Pros then noticed the Genius walking toward the end of the queue.
"Did you fail so quickly?" asked LeShawna, raising an eyebrow.
"Oh no, we didn't take the endeavor," said Ellody, waving her hands.
Mary nodded. "After some arguing, we concluded the best way to perform this challenge was to gather data before wasting calories performing."
"That sounds AWESOME!" shouted Tyler, making a strained smile. Then he whispered to LeShawna. "They did what?"
"I guess they decided to pass this turn," replied the sista, shrugging.
After the Genius took their place at the end of the line, the surfer dudes and Father and Son teams arrived. Geoff raised his hat after seeing the queue.
"WOW! This will be wicked," said Geoff, smiling.
"Don't worry Junior, I know you can do it. Just stay calm…"
"DAD!" Junior interrupted Dwayne. "I'm fine. You're the one who needs to calm down."
"Hahaha, you're right," said Dwayne, forcing a smile.
Then the stepbrothers arrived, both were still trembling after fighting for a long time in the freezing river.
"I hope you don't ruin this a-a-achoo…" Lorenzo glared at his stepbrother.
"Just watch me," said the brunette guy, making a confident smile.
After watching the Adversity twins' example, more teams performed better than expected. MacArthur made a wild performance, her jumps leaving some dents on the stage. Jen put on her shades and made a classy but daring air guitar performance, while Kitty made a performance filled with enthusiasm.
"Congratulations, Police cadets you're 2nd, Fashion bloggers 3rd and Sisters 4th," said Don, winking at the camera.
"Wow Jen, I didn't know you were so good at playing air guitar," said Tom clapping.
"I'm not, but we're fashionistas, if we go into the stage, we'll just rock it," said Jen, winking proudly.
The Fashion bloggers laughed while the sisters behind them were bitter.
"Kitty we need to improve our game," said Emma, frowning.
"What? We arrived in fourth place again," said Kitty, raising both eyebrows.
Emma scoffed. "You mean we failed to improve our ranking again. You need to stop being so optimistic and focus."
Kitty stopped, groaning in annoyance. "But you were the one who said fourth was a good placement."
But not all the teams could pass the challenge. Jacques accidentally stepped on a damaged cable and got an electric shock, while Taylor's performance was so soulless and boring that the goth public threw tomatoes at her.
"Ugh, Mom, those plebs don't have any musical sense. How could they fail my performance?" said Taylor in a loud voice.
"Because you suck," said LeShawna, rolling her eyes.
"Excuse you," said the brat, glaring at the sista.
But LeShawna just pointed at Tyler. The jock was jumping around the stage, having the time of his life. The public share his enthusiasm. He was about to fall, but his foot got stuck in one of the floor's dents, and he ended up doing a summersault.
"You sucked? Want to win? Just perform like that," said LeShawna after the applause meter announced the TV Pros' victory.
Father and Son and the Surfer dudes cheered while Taylor clenched her teeth and stomped her foot. "MOM! We can't lose against her."
"Of course not honey," said Kelly, trying to hide the smile on her face.
Solo confessional: Motivation
"It's been forever since I saw my Taylor so psyched up. I must thank that LeShawna after the show," said Kelly, smiling. "Of course the book I bought about how to be a mother says hate isn't a good motivation, but I'm just working with what I have at hand."
The Real Reality TV Pros entered the carpet. "LeShawna and Tyler, you're in 5th."
"Yeah," said Tyler, high-fiving his teammate.
As they celebrated, the Larpers arrived, the last ones in the queue.
"Oh no! Tammy we're the last ones," said Leonard, pulling his wizard hat over his eyes.
Tammy shrugged. "Don't worry. There are still 7 teams in the game."
As she said that, the Genius stepped on the stage, and Ellody performed a mix of Mickey, Kitty, and Tyler moves, passing the challenge. Geoff performed a passionated number, and Junior did the most professional Air guitar act so far,
"Congratulations, Genius you're in 6th, Surfer dudes 7th and Father and son 8th," said Don winking, "I must say the performances tonight are pretty fun."
"Well, maybe we should get worried," Tammy gulped as Leonard rubbed his hands nervously.
Lucky for them, Chet went into the stage and did a good job at the start, but then he sneezed, covering his hands with snot.
"Yuck!" shouted Chet.
"Yuck!" shouted the teams waiting on backstage.
"Yuck!" shouted the goths in the audience.
Chet went out, failing the challenge. Lorenzo was waiting for him with some paper napkins.
"Well done ruining it, Mr. Snot," Lorenzo rolled his eyes.
"I know, don't need you to tell me about it," said Chet, cleaning his hands.
Lorenzo sighed. "But your moves weren't half bad, so just nail it in the next one."
Chet looked at him with wide eyes but didn't utter a word.
However, the tension was at its max, Jaques went into the stage, and his performance was amazing.
"Ice dancers, you're 9th," said Don, smirking.
"NINTH!" Joseé shouted before passing out.
"Joseé, Joseé!" Jacques talked to her, but she was frozen. Jacques carried her out of the carpet. "These bad placements are starting to get her."
Don just shrugged as Taylor entered the stage.
"You can do it, honey!" shouted Kelly in a pretty embarrassing way.
However, Taylor didn't hear her. She was completely focused on crushing LeShawna. The brat lowered her head and disheveled her hair in a wild mane, trying her best to air guitar like the bozos before her.
The public wasn't too excited with her performance until she did a guitar slide and bent her back, almost touching the floor. That was enough to get the victory.
"You did it!" shouted Kelly, entering the stage.
"Of course I did it. Do you remember who am I?" said Taylor, still bent on the floor. "Now help me, I can't stand up."
Kelly chuckled while the larpers and the Stepbrothers watched.
"Tammy, no pressure ok, just do your best," said Leonard, massaging her shoulders.
"Ok!"
"However, if you complete this quest, we'll be safe," Leonard said more solemnly.
"Ok!"
"and if you fail, we may be eliminated…"
"Leo, shut up!" said Tammy, frowning at her teammate.
Tammy entered the stage. The public watched her with a mix of curiosity and concern. After all she was dressed as a viking.
She took a deep breath and suddenly began to play the ocarina. Everyone was dumbfounded.
"Oh crap," said Leonard, pulling his hat again while the stepbrothers watched her with crossed fingers.
However, the public began to warm to the old and familiar song. There wasn't any background sound, but everyone began to cheer as she began to mix some air guitar moves with the ocarina song with the public singing in loud voices. Suddenly the board began to sound. The Larpers had won.
"And to my surprise, the Larpers are in 11th," said Don, wide-eyed. "But how?"
"Yes Tammy, what kind of magic did you cast?" asked Leonard, hugging his teammate.
"It wasn't a spell, I performed Soittajapaimen on the ocarina," said Tammy smiling proudly.
Don and Leonard looked at her with confused expressions.
"A classic Finnish song," Tammy sighed, deadpanning at the host and her teammate.
"Ohh, that was smart," said Don nodding. "I thought it was a weird charm, you really surprised me there. A well-deserved 11th place."
Leonard nodded, "I never doubt you, my friend."
Tammy just looked at him, blinking a couple of times.
"Ok, maybe I doubted a little," Leonard rubbed his neck. "But you showed your high charisma stat and performance skill, so let's celebrate with butterbeer!"
"That's more like the Leonard I know," said Tammy cheering and playing a tune on her ocarina.
Don walked into the stage. "Chet, Lorenzo, You did better than I expected for a team fighting among themselves during most challenges. So I'm sorry to say this, but you're out of the race."
"What? Ugh, I knew you would be the reason why we would be eliminated from the race," said Lorenzo folding his arms.
"Yes, I'm sorry, that sneeze really killed us," said Chet, shrugging.
Lorenzo's jaw dropped, not expecting that answer. "Nah, you weren't half-bad. I'm sure without the sneeze, you would have nailed it."
"Thanks?" said Chet, frowning. "You know, you're a poo-head, but maybe not as bad as I thought."
"Hah, you're the poo-head," replied Lorenzo in a less enthusiastic voice. "Want to go and buy some Finnish metal cds before returning home? I know you love those."
Chet laughed. "That's the smartest thing you have said during all the race."
Both Stepbrothers then went off the stage, laughing. Don looked at the camera, smiling. "seven teams are gone, eleven remain. Who will remain until the end? The only way to find out is to keep watching The Ridonculous Race."
Leshawna, Tyler, Brody, and Geoff were eating together after the leg, the twins were too tired after the performance, so they didn't join. Everyone's skin looked smooth after the sauna, and they were chatting happily.
"My biggest surprise was that the twin dudes won first place," said Geoff, raising his eyebrows.
"Yeah, those dudes are pretty hardcore," said Brody, who was looking at LeShawna.
Tyler nodded. "Yeah, that's why they are our all-umph!"
LeShawna quickly elbowed her teammate. "Yes, those boys are stronger than they seem. And you need to improve your game. How did you end in 7th?"
"Oh, don't sweat about it, Lesh. Brody and I like to take our time," said Geoff, winking.
"But I'm so glad you're worried about us," said Brody, holding her hand tightly with watery eyes.
LeShawna blushed. "Oh, c'mon, we're friends. It's normal we worry about each other."
Tyler made a wide smile, not saying a word. Neither of them realized someone was watching them.
On a different table, Jacques and Joseé were glaring at them, Joseé caressing her lava rock.
"I can't believe we ended in 9t. We're turning into … losers," said Joseé, sniffing.
"It must be those TV Pro's fault!" said Jaques, "What a coincidence Tyler tripped on the same cable I got shocked with."
Joseé nodded. "If we want to win, those has-beens need to go."
If looks could kill, the Real reality tv pros would fall dead instantly. Tyler and LeShawna left the restaurant blissfully unaware of what had happened and went to their room.
"Ty, you can't tell others about our alliance with the twins," said LeShawna from the bathroom as she changed into her pajamas.
"Why not?" asked the jock lying on his bed.
Leshawna sighed. "Because that would put a target in the twins and us. Even if there aren't votes in this game, I don't want to be on the bad side of other teams."
"Hahaha, I think you're worrying too much," said Tyler, laughing. "But more important, it seems someone has an admirer."
"Oh c'mon Ty, stop that. Brody's just being nice," said LeShawna, winking.
Tyler waggled his eyebrows. "I think he was actually flirting."
"Hahaha, why do you guys love making couples so much?" said LeShawna laughing.
The jock shrugged, and after laughing some more, both fell asleep.
Or pretended to sleep. At least one of them was still awake, thinking about what happened today. LeShawna's noticed Brody's crush some time ago but decided to ignore it. What should she do? The sista stood awake, thinking about what she wanted to do.
Finland ended with another unexpected event. Now only 11 teams remain in the competition, What will happen next?
The twins chose Leshwana and Tyler as their allies. Will this work? Well, at least for the twins is working, even if they don't have a way to know in a different reality, they would go home in this challenge.
And here I think is where we can see the best part of this story. Things try to be the same, but things become different with so many changes in the elimination order. The twins are safe, the ice dancer's lucky charm is still here, Emma and Kitty relationship is taking a different turn, etc. So you can already expect what will happen.
Also, about the joint joke, I don't think people should take drugs and much less before 21 years old, it's just to show Brody is an idiot and to make Dwayne distrust the surfer dudes even more, but in no way I'm exhorting anyone to try it.
Finally, please leave a review/comment with your thoughts about the chapter, this helps me to both got my motivation and also know what things you're enjoying and which ones you hate. Or at least leave a favorite/kudos so I know you are having a good time.
Now let me answer the latest reviews:
bobomb33rd: Yes, and this is also a warning for the Larpers, which are consistently ending in the bottom. I hope Finland resolution was amusing, as you find out the twins without Noah and with LeShawna's help are in a better placement, and the Ice dancers keep their "lucky" stone, let's hope it's not that cursed.
I hope you enjoyed the chapter.