"Do you know the terror of he who falls asleep? To the very toes he is terrified, because the ground gives way under him, and the dream begins."

Friedrich Nietzsche

The children were screaming. They always screamed. There was, he had learned, nothing he could do to stop their screaming. Nothing, that is, short of waking up. He'd gotten really good at pulling himself out of the horror of that dream. He only wished he could prevent himself from dreaming it at all.

Jerking awake, he sat up, blinking his eyes and getting his bearings. He'd gotten accustomed to waking up, bathed in sweat, heart beating rapidly, only to find himself in his own bedroom. Tonight, however, he found himself waking up in Lisa's bedroom.

Much to his chagrin, Lisa woke with him and he found her looking at him, concern etched on her sleepy features.

"Don't even tell me that wasn't a nightmare," she said, sitting up.

It wasn't "a nightmare"; it was the same nightmare he'd been having for twenty years. It came and went, usually getting the most repetitive around the anniversary of the Galens' murder, in April. This year, the dreams had intensified earlier than normal, ramping up in late March. He'd been doing his best to keep them from Lisa, not willing to let her see him in this state. But it was getting harder and harder to hide. This year, they'd gotten more graphic, more violent and when he finally did wake himself, he was a wreck.

"It was," he quietly said, rubbing his hands over his face and willing his breathing to slow.

"Which case?" she asked.

"Remember the Galen murders?"

Lisa thought for a moment, "The guy killed the couple with an axe, while the kids were still in the house."

He nodded. "It's never been solved."

"The charm bracelet you have mounted in a frame," she softly said, "The one that hangs on the wall in your office with your awards…"

"Their grandmother gave it to me. Their mother had been wearing it."

"That was what? Twenty years ago?"

"Twenty years ago this April."

"It still eats at you," she said, her voice still soft. She took his hand in hers, "And the nightmares are getting worse."

He thought he had been successful in hiding them from her; apparently, he hadn't done as good of a job as he'd thought. "You knew?"

"This isn't the first night you woke up thrashing around."

"Why haven't you mentioned it?"

"Because I know you, if you wanted to talk about it, you'd bring it up. Otherwise you'd give me some bullshit answer and we'd go back to sleep." She squeezed his hand, "This case is what brought you back to the Bureau, isn't it? All the lines about being bored at home were just a smoke screen."

He nodded, "I always had my eyes open for new leads. I've got contacts, but there's only so far you can go without a badge."

"So you came back hoping you'd be able to solve a twenty year old cold case?" her tone was sympathetic, not critical and he was touched by it.

"I made a promise to the grand mother," he admitted.

"You broke your own rule, never promise you'll solve the case, only promise that you'll do your best."

"With the resources we have now, I should be able to solve this case."

"Are you working on it?"

He shrugged, "I haven't had time. I hit the ground running once I came back."

"Maybe you need to make the time."

"Maybe I do," he agreed. He didn't want to have this discussion with her, not in the middle of the night anyway. "I'm sorry I woke you."

"You didn't do it on purpose," she dismissed, lying back onto the pillows. "Let's go back to sleep." She held her arms open, "Come 'ere."

He lay with her, resting his head on her chest, and felt her arms wrap around him. He knew he wouldn't fall back to sleep tonight, but he would gladly take the comfort she offered.

"I love you, David Rossi," she softly said, pressing her lips to his forehead. "I know I haven't said it yet, but I do."

Moving so that they were face to face, he studied her eyes. "So let me get this straight," he began, his hand traveling along her side. "I bust my ass for months and it takes a nightmare to get you to finally tell me that you love me?"

"The nightmare was not what provoked the I love you," she said with a gentle laugh. "Come on, you're the best profiler in the Bureau, you can figure it out."

"You're going to turn my hair gray, Little Girl," he sighed, then said, "Not that I'd ever be able to figure out that strange mind of yours, but I'm going to say that it wasn't the nightmare, but the fact that I'm still holding to the promise I made 20 years ago. It shows I'm honorable."

"Nope," she returned, smartly. "Try again, Agent Rossi."

"I'm glad you're on our side," he muttered.

"Okay, it's late and you're not in the best frame of mind," she said, kissing him softly. "I love it when I see your human side, beyond the slick, smooth exterior."

"You see that all the time," he dismissed, "I don't sing Barry White for just anybody, you know."

"God, I hope not," she laughed. "I've seen the silly you, the sexy you, the pissed off you, but I don't get to see the fragile you. The vulnerable side doesn't show very often."

"As well it shouldn't," he sniffed. "I'm not a new age sensitive male, never will be."

"And I don't want you to be," she countered. "But, I don't want you to ever to hide that from me. I know first hand the shit you deal with every day. I see it too. There are days that I come home and cry it all out. I know that's not your style, but I don't want you to pretend that it doesn't effect you. You can come to me just to talk…or just for a hug. I'm really good at listening," she kissed him again.

She was easy to talk to, always had been. But tonight, he didn't want to talk. He just wanted to be close to her and block out the memories of the screaming children. He control of the next kiss, deepening it, savoring it, his hands traveling the along her sides, past her waist. They settled on the hem of her short silk nightgown, tugging it up and over her hips. Leaning above her, he bent and kissed her. "Say it again, Little Girl," he commanded, his eyes locking hers.

"I love you, David Rossi," she said, as their bodies joined. "I've always loved you."