A/N: Today I have learned that bourbon kicks my ASS. Oye. Onward.
Edward had a Master of Education in Learning Design and Technology. It was why he was well suited for a school like the one where he worked. The curriculum was designed around the student's needs, abilities, and specialties, so teachers needed to be able to analyze that information. He loved his job. When he was deciding what direction to take his career, he remembered the perfect sense of rightness and peace that had come over him when he decided to work with children.
The problem now was money. It hadn't been a problem when he started at the school just two years ago. He was young and single. What he made was more than enough to pay the rent on his apartment, cover his living expenses and put a little aside.
It was a whole different ballgame now. Now he had a small three bedroom house in a part of town he really couldn't afford. He'd had every intention of sending his children to public school, but now he had a smarty-pants six-year-old who was used to her expensive private school. Bella was even worse off. Before he'd come knocking on her door with news of their long lost daughter, she'd just been gearing up to go back to school so she could do more than customer service or accounts receivable. Pie in the sky-Edward wanted to be able to support all of them for a few years while Bella got a degree, if that was what she wanted. She was looking at various certificate programs as well. Either way, everything cost money they didn't have.
So Edward found himself job hunting in the private sector. The business world wasn't where he wanted to be, but his degree qualified him for a number of jobs in evaluation and training.
"You've had a charmed life, Edward," Carlisle had told him when they sat down for a heart to heart several days before. "Not to say that you're not a hard worker. You are, of course, but your life has always gone as planned. You went to college straight out of high school. You finished on time. You got a job right away.
"Sometimes, though, you have to make a choice between what you want to do and what's best for you and your family." Carlisle had clapped him on the shoulder. "You can plan all you want, but life is bound to take you places you'd never expect. It doesn't have to be a bad thing."
Edward had made peace with the idea. After all, he was still looking for work in a field that would both interest and challenge him. His wasn't a hard-knock life type of story where he had to be grateful for a backbreaking job that might or might not offer him enough hours to put food on the table. He was disappointed, and more than a little frustrated at having to start the job hunt all over again, but he strongly suspected he'd live.
The shuffle of little feet alerted him to Katie's presence, and he looked up from his laptop to see her hovering. He furrowed his brow when he got a good look at her. She'd been quiet all morning. She'd barely touched her breakfast and was listless when he tried to play with her. Edward had left her to her blocks and make believe. Now she just looked...off. She stood there with her bedraggled baby blanket wrapped around her shoulders, and said nothing.
Edward put his laptop to the side. "What's a matter, sweet girl?"
Her lower lip trembled slightly, but she took a deep breath. "I want Mommy."
Edward's heart gave a familiar pang, and he got up to go to her. Though she was comfortable and caring toward him, Katie never wanted him. The worst was when she woke up from a nightmare, calling for "Daddies!" Once, when she woke up, she'd yelled at Edward that she didn't want him. She'd let Bella soothe her then but not Edward.
He squatted by her side. "Mommy's at work for a little while, remember?" Bella had jumped at the chance of Saturday overtime. "She'll be back in four more hours. Then we're going to hang out."
Katie's lip jutted out even further, and she began to whimper. "I want her now," she said, more plaintive than demanding.
Edward sighed. "I'm right here. Come tell me what's the matter."
She took few more deep breaths, as though trying to calm herself down, but the whimpers won out. Katie's lower lip crumpled, and she wound her arms around his neck, clinging to him as she began to cry quietly. "Baby," Edward said, confused and aching at the sound. He stood with her in his arms, his hand against her back.
Katie was warm. Too warm.
"Oh, honey," Edward said, realizing belatedly what was happening. He could have kicked himself for not recognizing the signs sooner. He was a teacher, for goodness sake. He knew a sick child when he saw one. "You don't feel good at all, do you?"
"No," Katie said, her whining voice muffled against his neck. "Hurts."
"I bet." Edward smoothed her hair away from her forehead and pressed a kiss there. "Come on. We'll get you some Tylenol to help you feel better, and then how about a nap, hmm?"
Katie made some kind of grunting groan. Like most kids, she hated medicine, but she was likely feeling too lousy to put up much of a fight.
He dosed her with Tylenol and helped her change into her jammies. She refused to let him go when he tried to go get her a water bottle, so he carried her to the kitchen and back upstairs with him. She only growled when he tried to set her in bed.
Edward sighed again, this time ruefully. He hid a small smile against Katie's hair as he kissed the top of her head. "I guess Daddy's taking a nap too, hmm?"
He laid down with Katie draped over his chest and rubbed her back, singing softly as she drifted off. He meant to get up as soon as she was asleep. He had things to do, and he wondered if they had tomato rice soup. He liked tomato rice soup when he was sick. He'd liked when his mother made it for him.
In the end, though, he got wrapped up enjoying this quiet moment with his daughter. He hated that she felt bad, but despite the fact she radiated an uncomfortable amount of heat, he was glad he could do this for her. He was glad he could get her to stop whimpering, and that, even if he wasn't her first choice, she felt comforted in his arms.
He'd worried, when this all began, that he couldn't love her the way he was supposed to. Now, he realized how ridiculous the thought had been. He loved his little girl. The emotion of it filled him to the point of bursting. Having her and Bella was more than a fair trade for giving up the job he loved.
He must have fallen asleep, because next thing he knew, he was awakened by a click and a flash. "Whazit?" He blinked, trying to figure out what was going on, why he was so hot, and why there was a rock on his chest.
A squishy rock with soft hair and a raspy breath. Right. Sick kid.
Edward looked up to see Bella in the doorway, putting away her cell phone. He had to smile. He'd always wanted a picture of him sleeping with his child asleep on his chest. It was the obligatory daddy picture. Of course, when he'd thought about it in the past, he'd imagined his child being a baby, but that was beside the point.
"Don't tell me I was asleep for four hours," Edward said, rubbing at his eyes.
"I don't know. Depends on how lazy you are." Bella perched on the edge of Katie's bed. "I'm home early, if that's what you mean. Systems went down. Less pay for me, but I get to come home."
He hummed and tilted his head up invitingly. Her cheeks flushed, and she kissed him. A sweet kiss. He found it adorable how shy she could be about these things. They were still feeling their way around their ever-changing relationship. A kiss like this, while he held their daughter, felt much more intimate than almost anything else they'd done.
"Lay down a minute?" he asked, extending a hand toward her. He knew he should get up. He still had things to do, and his chest was damp with sweat from Katie laying on him. But he wanted both of his girls in his arms for a minute. Just a minute.
Bella took his hands and let him draw her down. The bed was far too small to hold all three of them. She had to lay on her side tucked right up against him, but that was exactly what he wanted. Bella smiled at him, pressing a kiss to the tip of his chin.
Her gaze went to their daughter. She ran her fingertips along Katie's cheek and gasped. "She's really warm," she said, pressing her palm to Katie's forehead.
"Hence the daytime nap. She was achy earlier."
"What do we do?" Bella said, and Edward was surprised to hear a frantic edge to her voice. "Listen to her breathing. That doesn't sound good. Do we need to take her to the hospital?"
"Calm down, Bella. She's fine. She's just sick, that's all."
Bella furrowed her brows, obviously displeased at this pronouncement. "You're sure she's okay? How high is her fever?"
"I didn't check. It's not that high. Hush." He ran his hand along her back as he'd done for Katie. "Kids get sick. It's perfectly fine. She'll be cranky and dripping goo for a few days, that's all."
Bella blew out a breath and rested again with her head on his arm. "Sorry. I know. Mikey, Angela, and Tyler were always getting the sniffles. I didn't mean to freak out."
"You're fine. Every new parent is entitled to a few panic attacks."
She eyed him. "What about you? I haven't seen you panic."
He snorted. "I'm sure my time is coming."
~0~
Since he had sick time and Bella didn't, Edward stayed home with Katie. Bella called to check on them several times. Rationally, she knew her baby was fine. Irrationally, Bella couldn't help but worry. She had the fear in her now, because she had the certain knowledge that her child could be taken from her. It happened once. It could happen again.
Edward was patient with her calls. He let her listen as he teased their daughter. He called her 'Sassy Baby Crankypants' because, as he'd predicted, she was in a horrible mood. Every time he did, Katie would make a disgruntled sound. Edward teased her and tickled her until she was equal parts growling and giggling.
"See, baby? I love you even when you make crankypants faces like this."
Whatever he did, Bella could hear Katie giggling. "I don't look like that."
"You totally do. Just like this."
He must have made the face again as Katie's giggles redoubled, accompanied by coughs, of course. Bella smiled hearing them. Katie had been way too miserable to laugh the day before.
"She'll be okay, Bella," Edward said.
"Ice cream would make my throat better," Katie said, her voice oozing sweet innocence.
Edward and Bella both laughed. "Good try, sweetheart, but dairy products are the last thing you need."
"How about I pick up pho for dinner, and I'll bring her one of the ice drinks?" Bella asked.
"Mm. That sounds good. Baby, Mommy wants to know if you want a strawberry iced drink or watermelon."
Time ticked by too slowly that day, but finally, Bella went home to Edward and Katie. She saw with her own eyes that Katie was much more active. She didn't cough as much and ate much more of her dinner than she had in the last two nights.
"I think we should keep her home one more day," Edward said after Katie was in bed. "I have enough time. It shouldn't be a problem. She's well enough that I can take her with me to pick up her homework. That'd probably be the responsible thing to do. Though, even at our school, she's not going to be that far behind missing two or three days of first grade."
Bella snorted, and he looked at her with an eyebrow raised. "Sorry," she said. "It's just strange sometimes." She shifted on the sofa, her body angled toward his. "When we planned all of this, decided we were going to be a family, I didn't see how it would ever work. You and I were strangers. Katie was happy with Emmett and Jasper." She blushed and ducked her head. "I don't know. It's just the way you said that. It's so old married couple. Like we've been doing this for years." She sighed. "Like we had her from the beginning. Like…"
Edward put his arm around her and scooted closer. He traced the shape of her jaw, and with his finger propped underneath her chin, he guided her head up to look at him. "Like we've been at this together for years instead of months?" he asked.
Her heart picked up a quickened rhythm, and she nodded.
He hummed, his eyes following the path his fingertip took as he traced the lines of her face. "Like sometimes you forget we've skipped a few very important parts?"
"I don't know about forget," Bella said, her tone light. Somehow, without thinking, she'd begun to trace patterns on his knee. "I don't forget the important parts."
His breath caught, and she tried to hold back a smirk, half proud of herself and half embarrassed at her double entendre. He laughed and tilted her chin up again to kiss her. As their lips met again and again, and chaste kisses turned to something much more serious, Edward ran his hand down her arm. He skimmed her thigh and hooked his fingers behind her knee, tugging up. Bella shifted, throwing her legs up over his lap. She leaned into him, balancing with her hand splayed over his chest.
It had been just under a month since Valentine's Day. Most of their time and energy went to Katie, particularly learning how to be first-time parents to a brilliant six-year-old. But here and there, they stole a moment for them. They were both being careful with the flame they carried for each other. There was too much at stake to throw caution to the wind and give in to their lust.
But, oh, the lust. When Edward kissed her like this, when he held her and his questing fingers sent a thrill down her spine, it was all she could do not to jump him.
His hand came up to cup her breast and though he'd done it before, somehow, today, she was done. She'd reached the limit of her self-control, and she couldn't find a compelling argument to justify holding back. Not anymore.
Every relationship was a leap of faith. She'd given this man her heart before she knew it was worth anything. It was the wrong time. The wrong way.
This was right.
With a gasp, Bella broke their kiss. Edward blinked, his hand still firm on her thigh. He swept his tongue over his lip. "Bella?"
Bella pushed away from him, trying to disentangle herself. In her fervor, she ended up on the floor on her ass. "Bella!" Edward said, startled. He stood up, looking down at her as she pushed up onto her elbows, panting. "What's wrong? What happened? What did I do?"
She shook her head, trying to gather her thoughts. Some people could be so suave at moments like these. She wasn't one of them.
"Can we, um. Can we go upstairs?"
His confused look remained for one, two, three heart-stopping moments. Then, his eyebrows arched skyward. "Are you-"
"I'm sure."
She didn't need to say anything else. Almost before those two words were out, he'd pulled her to her feet and was all but dragging her toward the stairs. She laughed. "Damn. You're easy."
Halfway up the stairs by then, Edward stopped and pinned her up against the wall. He kissed her-a hard, thorough kiss. "Bella, you should know up front, this is going to be embarrassingly fast."
She laughed again. "That's so sexy."
He looped an arm around her waist, pulling her up the remaining stairs. At the top, he caught her face between his hands and kissed her again. "We have time." He led her into his room and closed the door behind him. "We have time for slow." His grin turned wicked. "Later."
They devolved then into kisses, touches, and tugs. He pulled her shirt. She fumbled at his buttons. She stepped out of her pants, and he picked her up. Fast was the operative word. He tossed her on the bed and was over her in the next heartbeat, his body over hers, his lips moving with hers.
Bella was breathless under his attack. She ran her fingers through his hair as he kissed her chin, her neck, her collarbone. Just before he got to her breasts he pulled back so he could look at her. His gaze seemed to burn a line down her body, right between her breasts to her belly.
His expression changed from one moment to the next. In one heartbeat, his look turned from devourer to something unreadable. Bella was confused until she realized he was looking her belly. More specifically, he was looking at her stretch marks.
They weren't dark as they once had been. They'd long ago faded, like etching on her skin. She'd never thought much about them, which seemed strange to her in that moment. What was he thinking, she wondered. What was he thinking about the journey he'd begun with her, but had no part of?
Before she could give in to the urge to cover herself with her hands, he looked at her. He pressed his palm to her chest, feeling the erratic beat of her heart. "Are you nervous?"
"Yeah," she admitted in a whisper.
He stroked her cheek, the movement and the look in his eyes so tender, she thought her heart might break. "Don't be," he said, ducking his head to kiss her sweetly. His fingers trailed along the faded spiderweb veins. "We've done this before, remember?" He kissed along her cheek, down her neck. "I'm going to be so good to you, baby."
The mood had swung. He'd predicted it would be over quickly. It wasn't. He lowered his body to hers and kissed her. She was shaking. She didn't notice until that moment, but she was. Not because she was scared. She wasn't really. This was just… so much.
No amount of therapy could have prepared her for what it felt like to be here with him, accepted by him for all she was. He had all her secrets-her worst moments, her worst deeds, the darkness of her past-and yet he was still here, his eyes, his every touch full of love for her. All of her.
"Want you," she murmured against his lips when she thought she might go insane if he wasn't inside her. She needed it, needed him. He was part of her. She'd carried him inside her even after she'd run away from him, and she wanted him to come home again.
He rolled away from her only long enough to get a condom from the nightstand. He held himself above her, propped up on his hands. Bella stroked her fingers down his chest. She was smiling. It was a foolish, lovesick smile, and she couldn't honestly recall having ever been as content as she was right then.
Content and yet… hungry. She was desperate for him.
He lowered himself down again, lining up their bodies. Her legs spread to accept him, and he pushed inside her slowly. She took deep breaths, whimpering with a mixture of pleasure and surprise. Yes, there was a stretch and burn, but it wasn't bad.
No, it was the polar opposite of bad.
"Fuck, Bella." His full weight was on her. He pressed his face beside hers into the pillow, groaning.
She bucked her hips up against his, encouraging him to move. He didn't need much prodding. Together they set a slow, rocking rhythm. Their eyes were open, taking in every detail. She wrapped her legs around him, crossing them at the small of his back, pulling him in deeper.
When he hit a sweet spot deep inside her she gasped, digging her fingernails into the fleshiest part of his ass.
"Are you okay?" he asked
Bella nodded, beyond speech for the moment. Then, with his thrust, she let out such a loud moan it startled them both.
"Shhh," Edward shushed, laughing. He kissed her and drowned his own moan in her mouth.
They were still lip locked when they came, one following the other.
Neither of them spoke afterward. Bella combed his hair with shaky fingers. He laid his head on her breasts, closing his eyes at they caught their breaths.
They fell asleep, sticky, content, and thoroughly together.
A/N: As you might have noticed, we're nearing the end of our tale. I predict 1-2 chapters max, but we'll see. Either way, I know you're getting at least one extra chapter coz I want to tell Charlie's story, but let's not get ahead of ourselves.
How are we doing?