A/N; Hey guy (Smiles sheepishly) I'm so so so sorry. I've been stressing out over exams and problems at home. I know it's a lame excuse and my Writer's Block is invading my mind. Remember review=fuel. SO REMEMBER ENJOY AND REVIEW. (Also chapter may be a bit slower for my writers block is yet to be cured and I have work experience next week so yeah...)

Chapter Eight

'Reminders of Misery'

May 1998

Five year old Jaiden sat on the cream carpet cross-legged in front of the coffee table, her hair long blonde tresses covering her current activity. It was as if she didn't want anyone to see what she was doing. Though behind the certain lay a piece of paper she was scribbling on, a red crayon clutched in her tiny hand and her glasses perched on the end of her nose. A scowl was etched onto her baby face, her puffy lips drawn into a straight line, meaning that she was concentrating very hard on her artwork. Her kindergarten teacher, Miss Willows, had sent them all away with a task of drawing their family.

Jaiden made sure that her drawing was exceptional for she wanted to please Miss Willows. The woman was very kind, her glittering green eyes holding all the kindness in the world. She wished the woman was her mommy because her mother was horrible to her and her other family member, especially her daddy. The young girl loved her daddy more than anything in the world. He promised her that when she was older he would teach her how to play baseball; after all he was a coach at Alan and Scarlett's school. He had attempted to teach her the other day but she found the baseball too heavy. Plus her mommy found out and hit her father in front of her, though they did not speak of it the next day, even if he did have a massive bruise on his face.

"What are you doing, darlin'?" Her daddy's strong Bronx accent came. Hurriedly, she snatched the drawing off the table, pulling it onto her lap, not wanting him to see.

"Nothing Daddy," She answered, rolling the crayons away, gazing innocently at the ground. He sighed, a hint of pity on his face. James knelt down to her level, hooking a gentle hand under her chin; he lifted her head to gaze into her eye.

"I'm not going to shout at you over whatever you are doing," He stated giving her a small smile to which she returned however her grin didn't seem to reach her deep blue eyes. Gingerly, she handed him the sketch and his face immediately turned into sorrow. As he gazed at the picture he saw the five of them, Alan, Scarlett, Ivy, James and Jaiden. The three children's expressions were frightened as Ivy's expression was one of fury and James was laying down, multiple bruises on his body.

"Oh Jaiden," The paper drifted out of his hand before he engulfed his daughter into an embrace.

"I'm sorry Daddy," She mumbled into his shirt, her voice cracking ever so slightly. He shook his head, rubbing her back gently.

"No, no, no, don't be sweetie. I love you very much; sometimes I love you more than your mother. You are so brave. You've to deal with this for so long and I'm proud of you. Don't you forget that," He explained, placing a soft kiss in her hair. For the moment they stayed in their embrace, Jaiden's eyes beginning to flutter close. According to her daddy, when she was a baby she would only ever fall asleep if she was in his arms. The thought of that caused contentment to flow through her veins. Daddy was her favourite person and she wanted him to be with her forever. However, the drifting closed eyes snapped open when a shrill voice rang throughout the house.

"JAMES FUCKING MATTHEWS!" Jaiden flinched as she heard her mother.

Hot tears began to spring into her glasses and she stuffed her face further into her father's shirt. She was afraid of her mommy, sometimes when her daddy and siblings weren't home; she tended to become very furious. To which she took for fury out on Jaiden; leaving fresh bruises. They would wonder about it but Jaiden shrugged it off like it was nothing because in fact it was.

"It's okay sweetie. What don't you go upstairs an-and play with your dollies. I'll be-" As he told her what to do, she felt him begin to shake. This wasn't fair! Why can't her mommy be like other people's mommies? Hastily, she slipped out of his arms, grabbing her drawing from the floor before running towards the stairs.

Only smack face-first into her mother's legs.

"And where do you think you are going, girly?" A false grin plastered on her much too pale face. Gulping, Jaiden craned up to gaze at her. She seemed exhausted; her eyes had slightly sunk into her face, purple bags heavy under them. Her curly ginger locks were giving her the appearance of a lioness and her makeup was smeared.

"To-to my room. Daddy told me to play dollies," She cheered with faux glee, which her mother saw right through. Ivy clicked her tongue against the roof of her mouth, placing her hands on firmly on her hips.

"Hmmm," Her eyes flickered down to the paper in her hands. Using her index finger, Ivy pointed to it.

"What's that in your hands?" Jaiden didn't have the chance to answer for Ivy snatched it out of her clammy hands.

Nervously, she backed away, knowing that the woman before her would become infuriated.

And she was correct.

Jaiden observed in fear as Ivy's features dropping, rapidly transforming into rage, her left eye twitching as it always did when she became like this. Her fingers curled into the paper, ruining Jaiden's artwork in the process.

"What. Is. This?!" She all but screeched causing the little girl to flinch. James noticed his daughter's reaction and decided to interject.

"Ivy, why don't you calm down? This is a misunder-," Though he was rudely interrupted, in all honesty he wasn't surprised. But what puzzled him the most was how his wife came to be like this. When they were dating, he thought he was the luckiest man on earth. In high school, no one would spare him a second glance because he was the 'penguin'.

He wasn't the most attractive man in universe and at the time Ivy was the popular girl, she had everyone wrapped around her pinkie finger. It was in college when she started to take notice of her and he fell for her, there was no going back now. He figured that when she was pregnant with Jaiden was when it all started. Apparently, she despised the thought of a third child, quite content with Scarlett and Alan. Shaking his head, he cleared the thoughts away, now wasn't the time for that. Right now, he had to protect his baby girl.

"DON'T FUCKING TELL ME TO CALM DOWN!" The pitch of her voice was even higher than before, making him wince and Jaiden began to tremble.

"I'm sorry mommy. Please don't be mad," The girl's tone was one of desperation. She didn't want this to happen again, the last time it did, the doctors told her she fractured her wrist. Ivy didn't waste any time with replying for she stormed over to Jaiden. Furiously, she grabbed her long blonde locks, entangling them in her fingers and gave her hair a massive tug. Jaiden howled in pain, fat jelly bean tears rolling down her cheeks already.

"Ivy!" James snapped, his own white hot wrath bubbling underneath in normally level-headed, chilled exterior.

"What?" She all but chuckled, though it was rather dark. "Let go of my daughter," His response must have been hilarious because she howled with mirth.

"You're daughter? That's cute Jamie. Go on amuse me again," She taunted, a malevolent smirk on her face. "

Mom-mommy… P-p-p," She was silenced when Ivy began to dig her polished, cerise fingernails into her scalp, kicking her as well.

"Shut your mouth you whiny bitch," She ordered, venom laced in her tone. Jaiden had learnt from her experience not to back chat to her mother and just take the pain. She may only be five but she wasn't stupid, her siblings thought she was growing up too quickly. She wished they were here but they were hardly ever home anymore. Jaiden bit her lips, supressing a sob travelling up her mouth, threatening to escape her puffy lips. Instead, she screwed her eyes shut.

"I am sick and tired of everyone's shit and problems and all their baby tears! I've had fucking enough! Y'know what? I was sacked today. According to mister boss man, he can't have me sleeping around anymore; I mean how unfair is that? Every woman should have her needs fulfilled; get her sex, get her food, and get her money… But no! I have to come home every day to a whiny five year old; two kids that hate my guts and a husband who is more concerned about a girl who isn't even his! I hate her more than you!" As Ivy spoke, James felt every word feel like a dagger in his heart. He should have known better when she became pregnant with Jaiden. The fact was they hadn't slept together in years but he wished Jaiden was his. He really did.

"I AM FUCKING DONE!" She screeched, revelling something in her free hand.

A knife.

What in the hell?

His body moved before his mind could stop him. Ivy was going to kill his baby girl. His wife was sick. Just as she was about to bring the knife to Jaiden's head, James somehow managed to grasp the girl out her mother's grip, shielding her with his body. He felt the knife slice though his flesh, going very deep. He howled in pain, releasing his hold on Jaiden as he fell to his side, burning tears falling down his cheeks. Jaiden didn't turn around in fear of what she would witness, so she curled into a ball and lay on the floor soundlessly. But things were never too simple.

A pair of hands latched onto her sides, nails digging deep into her side. She bit her lip, trying to contain her cries but it was all too much. The owner of the hands lifted her off the floor and she became to scream, kicking her leg around uselessly.

"Shut up!" Her mother hissed into her ears, the nails beginning to puncture her skin. Rather than listening to her, the volume of her cries became louder. Loud enough for their next door neighbours to hear them. Jaiden had no idea where her mother was taking her, hopefully not the basement. No one went in the basement, even her gramps forbid anyone going down there and the house had been his before they all moved in. Apparently, Alan claimed that there was a monster hiding down there that eat naughty children and right now, that was here.

Her fear came true as Ivy swung the basement door open, throwing her into the darkness. She tried as she bounced on every step that led downwards. A loose nail embedded it's self into her side causing her to shriek, tears completely wetting her face. When she reached the last step, her glasses slipped off her nose, landing next to her, a massive cob-web crack appearing on the left side.

She lay on her front, her sobs racking her frail body, pain shooting in every possible place. She couldn't move anything, so the only thing she knew to do was scream for help. "HELP! HELP ME PLEASE! DADDY! ALLY! SCAR!" She repeated this over and over again until her voice became too hoarse and pain becoming too unbearable. She needed her daddy to save her; after all he was her superhero.

Something was hidden in the shadows opposite hear, she knew it. The thought of that only made her cower again. Her only source of light came streaming from the window above her. All she did was screw her eyes shut even tighter, bringing her shaking, painful hands to her ears, blocking out the monster's groans, her father's exclamations of anguish and her mother's screams of ire. Hopefully it would be over soon.

The first thing Jaiden realised when she came back to consciousness was that her wrists and shouldered were absolutely killing her. She let out a groan of pain, feeling the muscles screaming at her to be massaged. Another thing she knew that something stank and there was an annoying noise coming from a far. However the smell and the sound were very familiar to her nostrils and ears. The smell of rotting flesh and groans of the undead. Soon enough Jaiden began to panic, the memories of what had caused her be in this predicament. She wiggled at wrist, though it was completely useless for the rope was bound tightly. It burned as she did so but she was determined to escape. Was it really who she thought it was? Or was it just a figment of her imagination? Besides, her mind could be playing tricks on her as they found glee when they do so.

Would we really be that cruel?

Uh….

Yeah we would

Fair enough

People…

I can't believe you let yourself get kidnapped

Dumbass

Shouldn't we be more concerned about the situation we're in?

Who cares, she's gonna die anyway.

"SHUT UP! I've had enough of you! Just leave me the fuck alone!" She bellowed, instantly regretting it for the groans of the monsters intensified. She restarted her struggle on the rope, fearing that she would be eaten alive, which she most likely will.

She had to get out of here, no matter what. Jaiden was beyond frightened, in fact no word describe what she was feeling. Her stomach growled; she knew she should have eaten when she had the chance. A thought popped into her mind; would anyone miss me? Ceasing her struggling, she mulled over it. Sure she had grown close to Lee, Clem, Katjaa, Kenny, Duck and Carley but in the end would it mean anything at all. Everyone would probably end of dead despite how hard they tried. It would mean nothing in the end, so what was the point? She had nothing left to loose. All those she loved were lost. Ben, Scarlett, Daddy, Jimmy, Evie, Travis…

But there was one. One that she figured was alive.

She was snapped away from her thoughts when a door slammed shut, "What the fuck is the meaning of this?" The voice was one she recognized so well, she must be hallucinating. It's all too good to be true.

"Is that really you?" She wondered, her tone soft. The owner of the voice's heavy footfalls came tromping over to her. The only light came from the slowly dying bulb in the centre of the room, so she found it hard to see if it really was Alan.

Her big brother, her superhero, had her glass mind finally cracked, causing her to see what she hoped. "No it's Jesus," His voice dripped with sarcasm. She was about answer when he continued to speak. "Look what you did; these two were perfectly normal until you opened your trap. "Y'know it's annoying when you do that," He belittled her, clicking his tongue afterwards.

"Why are you doing this?" She rasped, shaking her head. Unexpectedly, he squeezed his cheeks painfully.

"Because I need to complete my doll set. I've got the son, the mother, now I've got the 'daughter' so to speak. It's a shame I don't have the Dad," He sounded too excited about his idea of a doll collection, and that's made her afraid.

"But first, I need to make you look good," With that he slapped her, leaving a massive red handprint behind. Hot tears sprang in her eyes but she didn't let them fall in fear that he would harm her more. The memories of being thrown down the basement appear in the mind and she bit back a sob.

"Oh dear, am I hurting you?" He mocked. Then he began to snicker maliciously. He attacked again, this time it was a blow to the stomach. Lurching forward, she coughed violently. He repeated his actions several more times, ending in Jaiden coughing up blood. The thick coppery liquid drilled down her chin then her neck; the smell of it seemed to make the Walker more furious, desperately wanting to feast.

"Please…stop…" She pleaded her voice scratchy and weak. He didn't reply, instead he hit her temple with object, knocking her out.

"Where did you two split?" Kenny questioned Lee as they ambled through the forest, rifles in hand.

"Just follow me," Was all Lee said before they fell into a silence again.

They had waited for at least half an hour. In that time to two men had small talk, anything to keep their mind off the situation. Lee was beyond worried. He should have acted; he should have stopped her from going off on a suicide mission. He still didn't understand why she did it in the first place, the wood wasn't that important, they could have found some elsewhere but it seemed that she was determined. For whatever reason he felt like she was trying to prove herself, yet she had done that already.

Jaiden cared for the children, keeping their minds away from all the madness, she fought despite the fact she was scared shitless. He just didn't understand. What he did know that teenage girls were the most complicated people in the universes, he had to learn that the hard way in high school. Rather the dwelling over his misery in high school, Lee started to become aware of his surroundings. They were close to the clearing, he could sense it.

"You think we're gonna find her?" Kenny pestered for the millionth time today and it was beginning to bother him. Don't get him wrong, Kenny was a good friend but right now wasn't the time these question that he was throwing at him.

"Of course we are," Lee answered shortly; he didn't mean to sound so rude. Lee was just exhausted. Kenny detected his attitude and kept his mouth shut for the time being. Though the moment the silence came, they arrived at the small clearing. There were no walkers at all. Nothing left except for the trail of death that lingered in their wake.

"This is it," Lee stated, ambling over to the right side of the clearing where Jaiden had disappeared.

"I still can't believe she did that," Kenny commented, coming to stand next to Lee.

"She was trying to help," Lee just kept heading straight in the direction Jaiden ran off.

"I know that, Lee. It just seems like a silly thing to do thinkin' about it," This time Lee didn't reply, determined to keep on track of his task to find Jaiden. As they ambled further along the trail, Lee noticed something lying on the ground. Quicken his pace; he saw that it was her baseball bat.

"The hell…" Kenny breathed. Kneeling down, Lee placed the rifle besides him, and picked up her bat, studying it. There was nothing unusual about it. The bat still had dried blood that didn't clean off as well as the engravings she carved every time she killed a walker. He found it strange but didn't question her. In all honesty he found that it was a clever idea.

"Lee," Kenny's alarmed voice snapped him out of his analysing of the bat. Turning to the man, he saw that he held a something he didn't wish to see.

Jaiden's black framed square glasses.

"Shit,"

November 2007

The pitch of the whistle made Jaiden wince, she had no idea why Mrs Garrison decided to do that. Probably a Gym Teacher thing.

"You girls have less than five minutes, so I suggest you hurry up and get changed!" She ordered her tone snappy, which was nothing out the usual. The endless chatter filled the changing rooms. They gossiped over cheerleader practice and rumours that floated around school; nothing new. Most of the girls ignored Jaiden whilst other shot daggers at her. Evie was ill today, so she'd been on her own. Just great, she mused, another day of torture here I come… With her head bowed, she hurriedly made her way to the bathroom, her gym clothes close to her chest. She felt the girls scorching gaze on her back but for now, she chose to ignore it.

Making sure the door was firmly locked behind her, she began to undress. She shivered, there was no heating whatsoever on in the bathroom, despite the fact that it was the middle of winter. As Jaiden pulled her shirt on, she realised that it was too large for her. It came down to her knees and the sleeves ended at her elbows. This was Alan's shirt. Once she had hopped into her jogging bottoms (doing her little dance to get in them as she did so), she tucked the bottom of Alan's shirt in and rolled up the sleeves as high as she could. Then another disaster struck. This was the shirt with the massive stain. She wanted to cry, it's not that was anything unusual with that.

Sometimes, she would sit in the corner of her room and cry her eyes out like a baby. Weak, stupid, pathetic and ugly; the four words that summed her up perfectly. Even if people told her otherwise, she knew they were lying. Her fingers lightly brushed the scars on her wrists, she thought about adding more but she mentally slapped herself. Jaiden had convinced herself to stop doing the horrible activity, even if she did enjoy the pain. It sounded like the silliest thing in the world, yet it made a lot of sense to her. No one would understand what she went through. Every single day of her life she had to put up with the endless threats and countless beatings. At first she stood up for herself though after she thought

'What's the point?'

There wasn't a point at all for defending herself, the bullying only became worse. Now, she decided she didn't want to let people down anymore. She didn't want to let Benny down because he meant more to her than anymore. Alan hadn't been the loveliest person as of late, something had… changed in him. And she knew why. According to Scarlett, the prison wards had found her mother hanging in her prison cell. She had killed herself with her shoelaces. Then tears began to fall. She curled up on the toilet seat, pressing her hand as close to her mouth as possible to muffle her sobs.

Why hadn't she seen more of her mother? Jaiden received the letters Ivy had sent, only to burn them. It was too painful for her to even think about her. The incident may have been nine years ago but she just couldn't forgive her mother and now her opinion had changed. In a way, death made things easier than life itself.

"MATTHEWS!" Mrs Garrison shrilly voice rang out, bouncing off the empty walls. Jaiden ceased any form of movement, including her breathing.

"I know you're in here!" She sang, slight fury in her tone. Such fury made Jaiden shrink back and cover her glasses with the palm of her hands. A booming knock sounded on the toilet door.

"You come out know or I give you another detention," Sighing, she removed herself from the toilet seat before standing; her shoulders slumped in defeat. Alan would be extremely disappointed, again. She couldn't afford to make him feel the same way again. There had been enough detentions to prove that.

"Coming," She mumbled. When she swung open the door she was met with a tomato faced Mrs Garrison. Hands on hips, Mrs Garrison tutted.

Well fucking done Matthews.

Yet another disappointment

Honestly when are you going to learn?

Wait to you get out to the wolves

They're hungry, we can sense it.

You can be a tasty piece of mental, whiny meat.

"Matthews? Are you listening to me?" Rather than answering the gym teacher's question, she brushed past her, heading straight for the door. Mrs Garrison's calls were sent to deaf ears as Jaiden shut her out. Hastily, she threw the changing room door open.

Though it seemed her day just kept getting worse and worse.

There they were.

The wolves.

Ready to feast on their prey.

"Where do you think you're going four eyes?" Lucy seethed, "Yeah four eyes," Faye repeated dumbly, twirling her bleach blonde hair with her index finger. "None of your damn business, bitch," She mumbled, hoping she wouldn't hear her. Jaiden attempted to dodge them, only to be tripped up when passing them. Landing painfully on her elbow and her glasses flew off her nose. Seems that Lucy did here her.

"Stupid bitch," Lucy giggled, spitting in her face. Wiping the salvia off, she scurried to her feet in search of her glasses, only to be kicked in the back. Hot tears already began to prick in her eyes. Again, she was weak. Rage flowed through her veins. She let the continued to beat her, she allowed herself to be weak. As much as she wanted to stand up for herself, she didn't have the guts.

"Just stop Lucy! What did I ever do to you?!" Jaiden patted the ground in search of her spectacles.

"You stole him from me! It's your entire fault. You came prancing in and you took him from me. Ben was mine and you had to ruin everything! YOU FUCKING MENTALLY UNSTABLE BLIND SADDO BITCH!" Lucy screeched finishing with a heavy kick in the stomach. Jaiden curled up in a ball, completely in shock. This was the reason for the scenario? That she 'stole' Ben from Lucy? Absolute bullshit. She didn't express her thoughts as everyone began to kick her ruthlessly. Rude words were thrown to her and she just absorbed them.

The next time Jaiden awoke, her arms didn't feel as numb though her shoulders still killed her. The groans of the monsters still floated in the air as did the stench of their flesh. Nothing but darkness entered her vision. Licking her cracked, dry lips she tasted her dried blood, which made her gag ever so slightly. Alan had lost the plot. She supposed it ran in the family. Ivy, Jaiden, now Alan. What was wrong with them all?

"Please…" She murmured to no one in particular. She just wanted to be back at the motor inn with the ones she now called family. Family meant everything to her, whether it was blood or not. Jaiden wriggled around in her spot, discovering that she was bound to a wooden chair that could break at any moment. However, she felt something different about her face (apart from the bruises beginning to swell). Lowering her head slightly, she felt something begin to slip from her nose… her glasses! Confusion washed over her. Where on earth had he found them? When he had attacked her in the forest, she distinctly remembered her spectacles flying off her nose, maybe he had the time to pick them up?

The thought didn't seem very likely. Instead of letting her thoughts consuming her, Jaiden resumed her wiggling, the Walkers moans acting as background music. Jaiden kept her ears on full alert as she tried to complete her task. Footsteps came from upstairs. So she was in some kind of basement.

Great.

May of 1998 flashed through her mind. Shaking her head, she concentrated on what she was doing. Jaiden bent down to her right hand to untie the rope with her teeth. Although the process hurt her games and made her wrists burn, she managed to loosen the not enough to pull it free with her wrist. Her heart beat was pumping loudly in her ear drums, blocking out any sound commencing around her. Once her wrist was free, Jaiden started on her left wrist. Delight flowed through her. Finally, she could leave and never look back. But of course her life would never be that simple.

Someone- Alan- snatched her hand away from her current mission and slammed it back on the arm rest. Before she had time to react, something punctured the centre of her right hand causing her to scream. This only succeeded with a punch in the face and riling up the Walker more. Gazing at her hand, she felt bile rise to her throat at the sight of it. A nail had been slammed there, blood was gushing everywhere, some dropping to the floor but it mainly stained her fingers. Tears now flowed freely down her cheeks, like a strong current river. The pain made her feel numb.

"Oh shut up. What are you whining about," He chuckled darkly, a sick grin plastered on his dirty face, his teeth yellow giving off a disgusting scent. Despite the pain, she reeled back from him, wanting to be as far away from him as possible.

"Hey, hey, hey," He soothed, pulling her head back towards him. She held strong but when a slap in the face came, she complied.

"It's gonna be okay," He pressed a dry kiss on her right temple as well as stroking her sweat soaked hair. "Just watch this and you'll feel much better," Jaiden gulped in fear, afraid of what his idea of treatment was. She wasn't expecting his next move. Swiftly, he brought a butcher's knife down to her left middle finger, immediately falling off. This was the moment that Jaiden screamed her lungs out, the constant flow of tears blurring her version completely. Jaiden was in so much pain that it couldn't be expressed enough through words and her cries.

"What did I say about all you're wailing?" His utterance came out through clenched teeth, as if it pained him to do this to her.

"T-t-t-t-t-t-t-to, shut up," Her voice was shaky and hoarse.

"Good girl," Patting on her in the hand, he moved his body to her nailed hand. "No," She muttered, her tone pleading and fearful, her eyes fluttering closed as the pain made black dots spot over her vision.

YOU HAD IT COMING

THIS IS YOUR MESSAGE FOR ALL YOUR SCREWUPS

WE'VE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS IN A LONG TIME

IT'S AS IF ALAN'S HEARD US!

HALLEUJAH!

CHRISTMAS COULDN'T HAVE COME SOONER!

Another tear leaked out of her deep blue irises, falling onto Alan's hand. He stilled his movement of raising the butcher knife high in the air, as if contemplating his next actions. "

They gotta be fed. They need to have a taster for when you're their next dinner," Although his words were terrifying, his voice was very soft and gentle. This time he allowed her to screw her eyes shut, to not see the terror of cutting her right ring finger off; squeals following shortly afterwards.

Here ya go, sorry if it's not the best, I'm trying