Disclaimer: I do not own anyone or anything, except for Prue's kids.
It's a Bad, Bad, Bad, Bad World, Part 1
[Scene: Magic School. Great Hall, Chris stands on the ladder and pulls out a book from the bookshelf. Paige and Gideon are below, writing a spell.]
Chris: You know, your time travel section is due for a serious overhaul. I mean, I can find more information Googling.
Gideon: Googling?
Chris: Never mind. (Chris steps down.) Any luck with that spell yet?
Paige: You mean since the last two minutes you asked us?
Chris: Look, I'm just getting nervous here, okay? My birthday, it's in two days, and if I'm not outta here before I'm born-
Paige: What? Something bad that you don't know about could happen?
Chris: I just don't want to take any chances. Besides, I came here and did what I had to do, and that was to save the kids. Now it's time for me to go home.
(Prue, Piper, Cole, and Leo walk in. Cole and Leo are pushing Prue's and Piper's suitcases.)
Paige: Sooner than you might think.
Chris: Oh, no. No, no, no. Not yet. You're early.
Piper: Oh, relax. We're just getting a jump on things. We're not in labor. We're sending some stuff back to the house.
Chris: Just... don't scare me, okay?
Leo: What's the matter? Isn't the spell ready?
Gideon: I think it's ready. It should work.
Leo: Should work? What do you mean?
Gideon: Well, there are no guarantees with time travel, Leo. You should know that better than anyone. Sorry. There's always a chance that something might go wrong.
Leo: Alright, we're not taking any chances.
Chris: We might have to. I'm running out of time here.
Leo: No. I'm not sending you through a one-way portal unless I know where you're gonna land.
Gideon: Well, you can never be certain, unless, of course, you went too. And even then….
Leo: Alright. Let's just forget the spell and start to work on that potion again.
Gideon: But the spell has a better chance of working. It's the Power of Four.
Leo: Yeah, but if something goes wrong, he'll have extra potion with him and he can come right back.
Piper: I agree. It sounds safer, so why don't you guys get to work on that?
Prue: Paige, can you orb these home for me? Just squeeze them in the nursery or something.
Paige: Nursery.
Piper: You did clean out the nursery, right?
Paige: Yeah. No. I was working on the spell. I'm sorry.
Piper: Well, you better hurry, or else the new babies will be sleeping in your room.
Paige: Yeah, don't worry. I'm all over it.
(She goes over to the bags and orbs out.)
Piper: Don't forget diapers! Lots of diapers!
Chris: Okay. Gotta get outta here.
[Scene: Gideon's office. Gideon comes in and closes the door. He goes over to a curtain and pulls it back, revealing a mirror.]
Gideon: They're preparing to send the boy home. (Gideon sits down in a chair. His reflection, Evil Gideon, stays standing.) It's time.
Evil Gideon: For our plan to work, we have to get the sisters…
Gideon: And Leo and Chris out of the way. Don't worry. We will.
Opening Credits
[Scene: Outside Halliwell Manor. Phoebe gets out of her car and heads toward the Manor. A woman walks over to her.]
Woman: Hello, Phoebe! Excuse me, Phoebe! Hello.
(Phoebe stops and turns around.)
Phoebe: Hey, Mrs. Noble. What's up?
Mrs. Noble: What's up is you parked in my driveway, again.
Phoebe: Yeah. Unfortunately, there's nowhere else to park.
Mrs. Noble: So I should suffer?
Phoebe: Well, you know, Prue and Piper are bringing home the new babies in a couple of days, and I did a little shopping.
Mrs. Noble: This is getting to be a real problem.
Phoebe: You know what? Just do me a favor. Let me run inside, and put these bags down, and then I'll come outside and move the car. (A police car pulls up.) You called the patrol guy?
Mrs. Noble: This is the third time this week you've blocked me.
Phoebe: Yeah, well, if your dumpster didn't take up half the block, then I wouldn't have to park in your driveway.
(Mrs. Noble's jaw drops. The patrol officer comes over.)
Mrs. Noble: This is against neighborhood association rules!
Phoebe: (to Patrol Officer) Excuse me, can you write her a citation for that ugly eyesore dumpster over there, please?!
Patrol Officer: Homeowner's got a permit.
Phoebe: I don't have time for this.
(She leaves. Patrol Officer places a ticket on Phoebe's car.)
[Scene: Nursery. Paige is trying to put the bassinet together. Phoebe enters.]
Phoebe: Oh, look at how cute! I remember when the twins and Wyatt used to fit in there.
(Phoebe puts down her bags.)
Paige: This is not cute. This is the bassinet from hell. Do you know how to put this together?
Phoebe: No, that would be a Leo thing. I still can't believe we're bringing home new babies.
(Paige sits on the bed.)
Paige: Yeah, well, these babies are not gonna have anywhere to sleep.
Phoebe: I know. What made us wait so long to do this baby room?
Paige: We were busy trying to keep the kids from turning evil.
Phoebe: Here, let me help you.
(She takes off her jacket.)
Paige: You know, which I'm glad we did.
(Phoebe picks up the bassinet.)
Phoebe: I just really think we need to focus on the new babies right now.
Paige: And on getting Chris home. Oh, remember him? You know? The nephew? The one you've been avoiding?
Phoebe: I am not.
Paige: Okay, so why weren't you helping Gideon and I with the spell?
Phoebe: Because I was helping Leo trying to find the burdock root. It was very hard to find. It's backordered everywhere. (She puts the bassinet down.) You're right. You know what? We're just gonna get Chris a new bassinet.
(She sits on the bed.)
Paige: I'm gonna miss him, too, you know.
Phoebe: It sucks. I mean, I know he's going back to a better future and all. It's just…. We're just getting to know him, you know?
Paige: I know.
[Scene: Magic School. Chris draws a large triquetra symbol with chalk on the wall.]
Chris: I wonder how different the future's gonna be, how much different my life is gonna be.
(Chris steps back. Leo walks up to him.)
Leo: I just want you to get home safely. Now remember, if anything seems different, we have another vial of this to get back right away.
(Leo gives him a potion.)
Chris: You worry too much, you know that? I'll be fine.
Leo: I'm your father. It's my job to worry. Now listen, when you get back there, you gotta take it easy on Wyatt and your cousins, okay? You can't hold a grudge.
Chris: Hey, as long as they're not the Rulers of All Evil, I'm cool.
Leo: I'm serious. They're gonna be different. Good. They're not gonna remember they weren't. So if you really want to change the future, you gotta start with a clean slate.
Chris: Okay, okay, I get it. Now how about you? Are you starting with a clean slate?
Leo: How do you mean?
Chris: Well, you and Mom. Look, all I'm saying is I'd like to know where you two are headed before I go back, that's all.
Leo: It's complicated. I'm an Elder. I made a commitment.
Chris: So? It's not like you haven't broken the rules before. I'm living proof of that.
Leo: Yeah. We'll see. Listen, we have enough of this stuff if you want to try a dry run before everybody gets here. What do you think?
Chris: Yeah. Let's do it.
(Leo throws the potion at the triquetra. Before it hits the wall, the potion breaks. Leo and Chris fold their arms.)
Leo: That should have worked. I'll get you home, buddy, I promise. (Leo turns away. After a moment, Chris does too. Drops of blood appear on the floor, heading out the door.) We're gonna figure this out. You gotta keep your head up.
[Scene: Gideon's office. The door opens. Gideon appears as he pulls down his hood. He has a cut in his left palm. He telekinetically closes the door. He telekinetically opens the curtain. Evil Gideon is licking the blood of his cut on his right hand.]
Evil Gideon: Their potion almost certainly would have worked.
Gideon: We stopped them just in time, though…
Evil Gideon: It wasn't supposed to hurt. (They pull a large glass shard from their palms.) Shall we?
(They put their palms up toward each other and heal each other.)
Gideons: Thank you.
Gideon: At least now they'll be forced to use our spell.
Evil Gideon: The sooner the better. The kids' magic grows stronger by the day.
Gideon: That much power…
Evil Gideon: Is bound to turn them…
Gideon: Evil./Evil Gideon: Good.
Evil Gideon: We have to get those that protect them out of the way.
Gideon: Starting with Leo and Chris.
(There's a knock on the door. The door opens and Leo pokes his head in.)
Leo: (Echo) Gideon? (He sees him.) Hey, it looks like we're gonna need that spell after all. Is... is there an echo in here?
Gideon: It's poor acoustics. Have Prue and Piper gather their sisters, and I'll get the spell.
Leo: Okay. You know, I don't understand what happened. That potion should've worked.
Gideon: Like I said, time travel is tricky. You will still be escorting your son?
Leo: Well, I think so. I think it's safest, don't you?
Gideon: Absolutely. Gather everyone together. I'll be right along.
(Leo leaves. Gideon goes back to the mirror and meets Evil Gideon.)
Gideons: Here they come.
[Scene: Magic school. Cole and Leo push the twins and Wyatt into the Great Hall. Prue and Piper walk in. Chris is there.]
Chris: Where are Phoebe and Paige?
Piper: I'm sure they'll be here soon.
Chris: Soon? Soon is when Dad and I have to go.
Piper: Dad? What do you mean….? (to Leo) Wait, you're gonna go too?
Leo: Just long enough to make sure he gets where he needs to be.
Piper: And when exactly were you gonna tell me about this?
Chris: I told him he didn't have to come. I don't need him.
Leo: No. It's too dangerous. Remember the last time you went through a portal? You were almost dinosaur kibble. I have to go.
(Gideon comes in.)
Gideon: Sorry. I just wanted to go over the spell one more time, make a few tweaks.
Prue: Tweaks?
Piper: Let me see that.
(Piper takes the spell from Gideon's hands. Phoebe, Paige, and Richard orb in.)
Chris: Finally. Where have you guys been?
Paige: Sorry.
Phoebe: We're here now. You go back to that beautiful, peaceful world that you helped create.
(She and Chris hug.)
Prue: I'm really gonna miss you.
Chris: I'll miss you too.
(She and Chris hug.)
Paige: Aw. Here comes the huggin' part.
(She gives him a hug. Chris hugs Piper.)
Piper: Thank you for coming here. I love you.
Chris: I love you so much, Mom.
Piper: Now go on. Hurry. You be safe.
Chris: Thanks for all your help.
Gideon: You did a noble thing in coming here.
(Chris looks at the twins and Wyatt and makes a shooting sound.)
Chris: Pow. Be good.
(He waves at Cole and Richard. They wave back. Leo and Chris turn to the triquetra.)
Prue/Piper/Phoebe/Paige: "In this place and in this hour/We call upon the ancient power/Open the door through time and space. (The portal opens.) Create a path to another place.
(Leo and Chris walk into the portal.)
[Scene: Magic School. Leo and Chris walk through the portal and see the Evil Charmed Ones and Evil Gideon standing in front of them. Evil Gideon has a hand on Evil Phoebe's shoulder.]
Chris: Where are we?
[Cut to Magic School. The portal closes. Evil Leo and Evil Chris are there.]
Evil Leo: I have no idea.
Commercial Break
[Scene: Magic School. Takes off from before. Gideon walks up toward Evil Leo.]
Gideon: Something's gone wrong! Don't let them leave!
(Evil Leo pushes him backward into Phoebe. They fall down. Evil Chris makes a Darklighter's crossbow appear. He fires an arrow at Paige. Piper freezes it.)
Piper: Are you out of your mind?!
(She knocks the arrow down.)
Evil Leo: (To Evil Chris) Follow me.
(They black orb out. Piper gasps.)
Phoebe: What the hell was that all about?!
(Phoebe and Gideon stand up.)
Gideon: I'm not sure.
Paige: You're not sure? Chris just tried to kill me and you're not sure?!
Prue: We were supposed to send him back to the future, not turn him into a darklighter!
Piper: Excuse me, people! Those were black orbs! Where did they get black orbs from?!
Phoebe: Okay, breathe. Breathe, you two. You don't wanna go into labor yet.
(Phoebe rubs their stomachs.)
Paige: Well?
Gideon: Well, perhaps the spell wasn't specific enough.
Prue: Meaning what?
Gideon: Meaning, it worked, obviously. It opened up a portal. Not to another time, but... to another... world, a parallel world, but not just any parallel world, one that's the exact reverse of ours.
Paige: Reverse like what? Reverse like evil?
Gideon: Precisely. You see, it's all part of the grand design. A universe destined to maintain balance. Light and dark, yin and yang, good and evil. For good to prevail in this world, then an equally evil world must also exist.
Paige: Well, that's quite a faulty design, isn't it?
Gideon: No, it's not, Paige. Balance is everything. Without it, the cosmos doesn't spin.
Piper: Are you telling me that when our Leo and Chris stepped in there, their evil selves stepped out?
Gideon: Yes. It's a mirror world. Whatever happens there happens here.
Prue: So our Leo and Chris are in their evil world.
Piper: Well, we gotta go get 'em.
Cole: You can't go get them. You two aren't going anywhere.
Paige: Besides, what about those evil fellas that just came through here?
Piper: We'll go get them later.
Gideon: Actually, I think you should go after them now.
Phoebe: Why?
Gideon: Because for every second that they're in our world, they risk throwing off the balance by doing something evil.
[Scene: Golden Gate Bridge. Evil Chris drinks some beer as Evil Leo stands by.]
Evil Leo: You ever see anything so good?
Evil Chris: It's disgusting. Can you believe all the liquor stores are closed in the mornings here? What's up with that?
Evil Leo: Didn't stop you from kicking down the door to get in. (Evil Chris nods.) Why didn't you orb in?
Evil Chris: What's the fun in that?
(He takes another drink. Evil Leo chuckles. Evil Chris drops the beer bottle.)
Evil Leo: Strange. Everything seems the same, but, kinda different, you know? It's cleaner, it's happier, it's more civilized.
(A car crash is heard.)
Evil Chris: Now that's what I'm talking about.
Evil Leo: This place makes me sick. I gotta get outta here.
Evil Chris: Gives you an idea of what kind of awful, saccharine future I came from, why I had to come back and change it so bad.
Evil Leo: And I'll always be proud of you for that. You saved Wyatt from turning good. You gave us a second chance. The least I could do is get you back to your future, back to evil.
Evil Chris: Thanks, Dad.
Evil Leo: First we gotta get back to our world, though. We're gonna need the Power of Four to do that.
Evil Chris: Well, we can't trust those Pollyanna witches. They're too good. God, who do I have to kill so we can get out of here?
Evil Leo: I think I might know somebody, somebody we can use to force the sisters to help us.
[Scene: Manor. Attic. Phoebe is scrying while Paige gets the crystals.]
Phoebe: I don't understand. If they're just like our Leo and our Chris, then why do we need a crystal cage to trap them?
Paige: So they don't try to kill us again, for one thing.
Phoebe: Yeah, I don't think they were trying to kill us. I think that they were just surprised, like we were.
Paige: Yeah, well, I am not taking any chances. Hey, did you get any hits yet?
Phoebe: No, nothing. They must not be doing anything evil.
Paige: Yeah, well, if Gideon's right, it's just a matter of time. (In British accent) Besides, we wouldn't want the cosmos to stop spinning, would we?
Phoebe: It's so weird to think that there are evil twins of us out there doing the exact same thing as we are right now.
Paige: I can't think about that. It hurts my brain.
(The crystal drops on the map.)
Phoebe: Oh! I got 'em.
[Scene: Alleyway. Evil Chris smashes the garbage lid over Darryl, being held by Evil Leo. Darryl's already beaten up. He falls down. Evil Chris tosses the lid aside.]
Darryl: What the hell's wrong with you? I'm a cop!
Evil Leo: Pretty wimpy-looking one too, if you ask me.
Evil Chris: Nothing like our Darryl. I think that's the cheapest suit I've ever seen. What's the matter, huh? Girls not paying you enough?
Darryl: Paying me? What has gotten into you?
(Evil Chris grabs him by the collar and throws him across the alley.)
Evil Chris: This almost isn't any fun.
(Darryl point a gun at them.)
Darryl: I don't care if you are under some kind of spell. Come any closer, I'll shoot, I swear.
Evil Chris: Gun. (The gun black orbs out of his hands and into Evil Chris's hand. He laughs.) Now this is fun.
(He points the gun at Darryl.)
Evil Leo: Not yet. We still need him for leverage. He's no good to us dead. Not yet, anyway.
(He hands Evil Leo the gun. Phoebe and Paige orb in behind Evil Leo and Evil Chris. Paige puts two crystals down and orbs out. They turn around. Phoebe kicks the gun out of Evil Leo's hands.)
Evil Leo: That's not gonna stop us.
(Paige orbs in behind them.)
Phoebe: No, but…
Paige: This will.
(Paige puts the crystals down, activating the cage.)
Evil Leo: Son of a bitch.
(He powers up an energy ball. He throws it. It bounces off the cage and they duck.)
Paige: Nice firepower, Leo. I didn't know you had it in you.
Phoebe: Don't go anywhere.
(Phoebe and Paige go to help Darryl.)
[Scene: Gideon's study. Gideon and Evil Gideon are playing chess at the mirror.]
Gideon: My Charmed Ones will be joining you soon. Are you certain you can keep…
Evil Gideon: Mine away? Absolutely. I told them to wait at the manor for the good Leo and Chris to come to them. I'm taking your knight.
(Black knight moves over and smashes the White knight into pieces.)
Gideon: I knew you'd do that. So the next move, of course, is…
Evil Gideon: Prue and Piper. Once they're in labor, we'll have a clear shot at the kids.
Gideon: If we impress upon them the extent of the danger her sisters are in…
Evil Gideon: It will expedite matters.
Gideon: But everything has to happen quickly. We're tinkering here with the grand design, risking its tenuous stability…
Evil Gideon: By creating an imbalance of power on one side. I know. But it's a far greater risk to allow the kids to grow up...
Gideon: To threaten both worlds. I agree.
(Gideon telekinetically moves a white knight and it smashes the black queen. Evil Gideon smiles.)
Evil Gideon: I like the way you think.
Phoebe: (from another room) Gideon?!
(Gideon stands up.)
Evil Gideon: No echo.
Gideon: A good sign.
(Evil Gideon stands.)
Evil Gideon: They can never know we were behind this.
Gideon: They won't.
(Gideon leaves.)
[Cut to the Great Hall. Phoebe and Paige are there. Gideon enters.]
Gideon: Did you catch them?
Paige: Yeah. Stuck 'em in a classroom, and, you know, they can't orb out of there.
Phoebe: They are a little feistier than the real Leo and Chris. I don't know how we're going to get them to cooperate.
Gideon: Yeah. Well, I'm sure your evil counterparts are anticipating exactly the same problems since, other than morality, you're one and the same.
Phoebe: How does that help us figure out what we're supposed to do?
Gideon: Perhaps you should trade yourselves. You go into their world, they'll come into ours. You can each retrieve your respective Leo and Chris.
Paige: Kind of makes sense.
Phoebe: And what about your evil counterpart? Will he be hip to this plan?
Gideon: I have every confidence that he will be waiting there exactly as I am here. But remember, good or evil, we're all after the same thing – Leo and Chris returned and the cosmic balance restored.
Phoebe: Get Prue and Piper. We're gonna need the Power of Four.
[Scene: Magic School. Mirror world. A portal opens and Phoebe and Paige walk through. They see the Magic School darker and more evil.]
Paige: Okay, where is everybody? Aren't Prue and Piper supposed to be here?
Phoebe: This is weird. I don't think we should be here. We should get out of here.
(Suddenly an energy ball flies at them. They scream and duck. Evil Gideon walks up to them.)
Evil Gideon: What are you doing?! You're not supposed to be here.
(Phoebe and Paige look back at the portal. It closes.)
[Cut to Good Magic School. Piper sees the portal close.]
Piper: Why didn't they come through? Where are they?
Gideon: I don't know. (Prue and Piper take a panicked breath. They put a hand around their stomachs and go toward a chair.) Easy. Try to relax. (Prue and Piper sit down.) We wouldn't want you to go into premature labor now, would we?
(He looks at the twins and Wyatt.)
Commercial Break
[Scene: Evil Magic School. Phoebe, Paige, and Evil Gideon are there.]
Evil Gideon: You have no idea what you've done. Just by coming here, you may have thrown both worlds irreversibly out of balance.
Paige: Okay, well, doesn't killing us sort of do that, too?
Evil Gideon: Don't be ridiculous. If I wanted to kill you, I would have. I was just... caught off guard.
Phoebe: Well, you need to relax there, tiger.
Evil Gideon: It's a different world here, Phoebs. One filled with distrust, even amongst allies.
Phoebe: I don't understand. Where are your Phoebe and Paige?
Evil Gideon: Out looking for your Leo and Chris. They were supposed to bring them back here.
Phoebe: Well, your Leo and Chris are at our Magic School waiting to be rescued. (Evil Gideon puts a hand on Phoebe's shoulder.) Yes.
Paige: Okay, this is just one big mess. What happened to the whole yin-yang business?
Evil Gideon: It's been thrown off, possibly as a result of the exchange of Leo and Chris. Two worlds that mirror each other when they're in balance. And they no longer are.
Paige: Okay, if it's already bad, what's gonna happen now that we're here?
Evil Gideon: With both sets of sisters on the same side, the balance is dangerously at risk. We have to work quickly to correct it.
Phoebe: If you are suggesting a plan, don't. We've got it covered. You don't worry about it. We need to find his Piper.
Evil Gideon: If you do, she'll probably kill you. She's evil, remember, and she's got a terrible temper, and worse when she's pregnant.
(Phoebe and Paige shake their heads.)
Phoebe: Yeah, that's not much different in our world. Trust us, we can handle it.
Paige: Yeah.
Evil Gideon: Your instincts are right to distrust me. I am evil, after all. But we both want the same thing.
Paige: Okay, well there's a little problem with that, because your girls didn't uphold their end of the bargain. They did not find our guys.
Evil Gideon: But you will. You know them, know how they think.
Phoebe: Okay, so we're gonna bring you your Leo and Chris, and then what?
Evil Gideon: You'll have our Piper for a Power of Four spell. She'll know it's the only way to get her men back. But if you encounter your counterparts, be careful. They will kill you.
(Phoebe and Paige orb out.)
[Scene: Prescott Street. Rats are on trash cans. Broken cars are in the streets. There are unkempt and dirty yards around the houses with trash littering the streets. People yell at each other. A man steals a purse. The other neighbors ignore it. Phoebe and Paige duck out from behind an abandoned car. They look around.]
Paige: Okay, this place isn't just evil, it's ugly.
Phoebe: Oh, I don't think they're home. And I don't wanna go in there to find out.
Paige: The Charmed Ones working for evil. Who would've thunk it? Well, I'm with ya, especially after Gideon's little warning.
(A kid rides by on a bike and breaks a car window with a metal rod.)
Phoebe: Hey!
Paige: I don't think Leo and Chris would've gone into that house either.
Phoebe: Maybe they went to see Darryl like their counterparts did. I think we should talk to Darryl.
(A neighbor walks out with a dog. The dog barks at Phoebe.)
Phoebe: Maybe he will if he thinks we're them.
Paige: Okay, I really think we need to get outta here.
(Paige takes out her cell phone.)
Phoebe: What're you doing?
(She dials.)
Paige: I wanna see if this works in the parallel world. Ah! It does. (Into the phone) Hi, can I have Lieutenant Morris, please?
Voice: Hey! (They look over and see the Evil Patrol Officer walking to Evil Mrs. Noble.) Lady, you want me to give her a second citation, it's gonna cost ya.
Evil Mrs. Noble: Why, you greedy son of a…. Haven't I given you enough already?
Evil Patrol Officer: Hey, don't give me that!
(He pushes her down.)
Phoebe: Hey, leave her alone!
(He sees them walking toward him and starts backing away.)
Evil Patrol Officer: I, uh, I-I wasn't really gonna give you that citation.
(He leaves. Phoebe helps Evil Mrs. Noble up. She sees her and screams and runs away.)
Phoebe: Wow. We must be some badass witches in this world.
Paige: Yeah. Remember that for when we meet up with badass Darryl.
[Scene: P4. It's now a strip joint. Evil Darryl sits on a seat getting a lap dance from a girl. Phoebe and Paige walk in.]
Paige: Well, it looks like everybody's enjoying themselves.
Phoebe: Including Darryl. Ugh. Okay, just remember, we're... used to this.
Paige: Right. Think mean. Think nasty.
(They walk toward Darryl. A man walks up to Paige. She pushes him down. They walk over to Darryl. Phoebe clears her throat. Some officers block them.)
Evil Darryl: (To officers) It's alright. Let 'em through. (To Phoebe and Paige) I knew you'd show up sooner or later.
Phoebe: How's Sheila?
Evil Darryl: (To the dancer) It's alright, honey. I'll be here all night. (She leaves.) Sheila who?
(He shows them his wedding ring and laughs with his buddies. They knock knuckles. Phoebe pushes Evil Darryl backwards. She grabs a beer bottle, breaks it off, then puts it to Evil Darryl's throat.)
Phoebe: Leo and Chris, where are they?! Where are they?!
Evil Darryl: Last time I saw them was at the police station. Me and my boys were trying to give Chris what he deserved, but Leo orbed him away. I've never seen him run from a fight before.
Paige: Where'd they go?
Evil Darryl: If I knew, do you think I'd be here waiting for you? Where you been anyway? Undercover in the Underworld?
Phoebe: Why?
Evil Darryl: Bright, happy colors? Not exactly your style.
(Phoebe stands up and sees Evil Inspector Sheridan dancing on a pole.)
Phoebe: (To Evil Darryl) Don't get up.
(Phoebe and Paige walk away.)
Paige: Now what?
Phoebe: I think maybe we're looking at this all wrong. Maybe we all are.
Paige: Come again?
Phoebe: Well, listen, if Darryl won't help Leo and Chris because he's evil, then they'd have to go to someone who's good, right, to help them?
Paige: Okay, yeah, but who's not evil here? Where are the good guys? They hiding?
Phoebe: Yeah, in the Underworld. Think about it. Reverse it. Who's good here?
Paige: Demons.
Phoebe: Right, and if I know Leo, he would have gone after the most powerful good demon there is.
Paige: You're right.
[Scene: Underworld. It looks like a peaceful garden. Good Barbas turns around. He's wearing white.]
Good Barbas: I know the truth of all your hopes because I can feel your greatest hope inside here, the hope to one day return home. (He's talking to Leo and Chris.) Oh, and of course, your presence here gives me great hope, the hope that someplace there really is a different kind of world, a world where the greater good, the, uh, the goodness of the heart prevails.
(He walks past them, putting a hand on Leo's shoulder.)
Chris: Is he for real?
Leo: He must be. Demon of Fear in our world must be the Demon of Hope here. (to Good Barbas) Question is, do you have enough power to send us back?
Good Barbas: Oh, alas, no, I do not, not if you were brought here by the Power of Four. But, however, hope springs eternal, so I may be able to persuade the sisters of my world to help us simply by relying on their greatest hope, the hope to reunite with your counterparts, and then, maybe…. (He waves his hand over Chris' face.) You will be able to return to your time before it's too late as you hope.
(He begins to touch Chris, but he slaps his hand away.)
Chris: Whoa. Don't touch me.
(Phoebe and Paige orb in.)
Paige: Oh, thank god.
Good Barbas: Quickly, orb away. I will deal with them. I've done it before.
Leo: No, it's okay. They're the good ones.
Chris: Trust us. They're not evil.
(Evil Phoebe and Evil Paige walk up.)
Evil Phoebe: No, but we are.
(Evil Paige waves.)
[Scene: Good Magic School. Bedroom. Prue and Piper are lying on a bed in labor. Mrs. Winterbourne is there too.]
Mrs. Winterbourne: Breathe, dears, in long, out short. One in…three short. (She demonstrates.) In…three out.
Piper: Where are our sisters?
Mrs. Winterbourne: Gideon's trying to find them, dears. Just try to focus on the breathing. In-
(Gideon walks in.)
Gideon: What happened?
Mrs. Winterbourne: Their water broke. They need to get to a hospital.
Piper: Did you find them?
Gideon: No, not yet, but you can't wait any longer. It's not safe. (to Mrs. Winterbourne) Go. Hurry.
(She nods.)
Piper: Somebody has to stay with the kids.
(Gideon looks over at the twins and Wyatt in their playpen.)
Gideon: Don't worry. I'll take care of them.
Commercial Break
[Scene: Mirror World Underworld. Continues from before. Everyone's staring at Evil Phoebe and Evil Paige.]
Phoebe: Nice knuckles. Brass?
Evil Phoebe: No. Tiffany's.
Paige: Ooh, what a waste of a nice blue box.
Evil Paige: What'd you say, witch?
Phoebe: Okay, look, we didn't come here to fight. We just came to get Leo and Chris.
Evil Phoebe: Well, so did we.
Paige: Fine. You give us ours, we'll give you yours.
Evil Paige: Right. Like we can trust you. You're good.
Phoebe: Wait, you can't trust us? Who are the evil ones here?
Good Barbas: Come on, ladies. Have some hope. We can work this out peacefully.
Phoebes/Paiges: Shut up!
Evil Paige: We'll take care of you later.
Phoebes: Psst.
(Both Phoebes and Paiges turn around, their backs toward the other.)
Phoebe: (to Paige) Okay, we're gonna have to make a move, because the longer the worlds are out of balance…
Evil Phoebe: The worse the damage is.
Evil Paige: We have to get everyone back to where they belong.
Paige: Problem is, there's no talking to those witches. I wish I could just vanquish them.
Evil Phoebe: Me, too, but that'll really screw up the balance. We're gonna have to settle for…
Phoebe: Knocking them out so we can get Leo and Chris outta here.
Evil Paige: Good. We'll orb out and grab them…
Paige: From behind.
Phoebe: Perfect.
(Both Phoebes and Paiges turn around. Phoebe and Paige orb out and Evil Phoebe and Evil Paige black orb out. The orbs hit each other in mid air, sending each pair of sisters back, landing and reforming. They all stand up.)
Evil Phoebe: That sucked.
Phoebe: (to Paige) Alright. I'll take mine, you take yours.
(Phoebe and Evil Phoebe step away. Evil Paige conjures a Darklighter crossbow. Paige gasps. Evil Paige fires at her.)
Paige: Arrow! (The arrow orbs out. Evil Paige fires again.) Arrow!
(The arrow orbs out.)
[Cut to Phoebes. They are fighting, matching each other's moves.]
[Cut to Paiges. Evil Paige fires again.]
Paige: Arrow!
(The arrow orbs out. Evil Paige tosses the crossbow aside.)
Paiges: Rock!
(They each orb a rock and throw it toward each other.)
Leo: Look out! (Leo, Chris, and Good Barbas duck as the rocks smash in mid-air. It falls down in the center.) This is nuts. No one can win. They're too evenly matched.
Chris: Well, they think alike.
Paiges: Boulder!
Leo: No, no!
(They orb a large rock. Leo, Chris, and Good Barbas run and take cover behind a group of rocks. The boulders explode on impact.)
Leo: We don't have time for this. I gotta get back to Piper. We gotta get you home.
Chris: When Gideon said something can go wrong with the portal, I don't think he knew how wrong.
Good Barbas: You said Gideon?
Chris: Yeah. Why?
Good Barbas: Because just maybe, he did know how wrong it could go.
[Scene: Bedroom. Gideon, the twins, and Wyatt are there. Gideon walks over to their playpen. The kids puts their force field on.]
Gideon: That won't protect you for long, little ones. Not for long.
(Gideon puts his hands on the shield and bolts of electricity shoot from his palms. Gideon orbs himself and the kids out of the bedroom.)
[Scene: Mirror World Underworld. Phoebe and Evil Phoebe are still fighting.]
[Cut to Paiges.]
Paiges: Boulder!
(They throw the boulders at each other and they explode.)
Leo: What do you mean? Gideon is after the kids?
Good Barbas: He's desperately hoping to eliminate the kids.
(The Phoebes are still fighting. They fall to the ground. Paige and Evil Paige finally give up and walk over to the other. Their cell phones ring. They pull them out.)
Paiges: IPiper. (They answer their phones.) Hello?
Piper: (from phone) Where the hell are you? Prue and I are in labor. Get your ass over here.
Phoebes: Is she okay?
Paiges: She and Prue are in labor.
Piper: (from phone) Who's that? You've got an echo. What the hell is going on?
Paiges: We're on our way.
(They hang up. Leo, Chris, and Good Barbas stand up.)
Paige: We have to go get Piper.
Leo: And the kids.
[Scene: Attic. Gideon is by the Book of Shadows, casting a spell.]
Gideon: "Wanton powers in this blade, yield/Penetrate that which would shield." (An athame is above him. It glows. He takes it and goes over to the kids, who are sitting in the middle of the carpet with their force field on. The athame touches the shield and it powers down.) I'm truly sorry, but this is for the greater good.
(The athame glows with a purple light before disappearing out of Gideon's grip and reappearing back in, stabbing him. Gideon screams in pain. He pulls the athame out and goes to strike the kids, but feels a lot of pain. He hears chanting.)
[Cut to Mirror World. Manor. Attic. Evil Gideon puts down the athame as both sets of Phoebes and Paiges are chanting a spell. Leo and Chris are there.]
Phoebes/Paiges: "We call upon ancient lore/To punish with the power of four/Strike down this threat from both there and here/Make him suffer, then disappear." (Gideon black orbs out. The evil kids sit on the floor crying.) Thank god.
(Both Phoebes and Paiges take a step forward. They stop. Phoebe and Paige back up and Evil Phoebe and Evil Paige go over to the evil kids. Chris and Leo walk into the attic.)
Evil Phoebe: (to evil kids) Did you give that bad man Gideon those wounds?
Evil Paige: It looks like the kids can handle themselves.
(Leo picks up the athame.)
Leo: Yeah, but for how long? Gideon's one of the most powerful Elders. If he wants them dead, he'll find a way.
Chris: I can't believe it was Gideon all along.
Leo: And he's still out there. If he wasn't vanquished here, he wasn't vanquished in our world either.
Paige: So what we need to do is get everybody back in the right place.
Paiges: Yeah, fix this whole nutty balance… thing.
Paige: I'm with ya.
Leo: The problem is we don't have the Power of Four to open the portal.
Phoebes: Don't we?
(Paige and Evil Paige go to the wall. Evil Paige gives Paige a thick piece of white chalk. They start drawing the triquetra.)
[Scene: Magic School. Gideon's study. Gideon and Evil Gideon are healing themselves.]
Gideon: At least we're still alive.
Evil Gideon: Only because we barely made it back here in time!
Gideon: Still, we healed each other and we can try again, especially now that we can breach the kids' shield.
Evil Gideon: But the sisters know about us now! Worse, the imbalance has caused a shift in both worlds.
Gideon: Which we should be able to use to our advantage to distract them whilst we complete our task. We created the imbalance. We should be able to repair the shift, and when we do, we'll make sure that the sisters forget everything.
(Evil Gideon leaves.)
[Scene: Manor. Attic. The portal opens and Phoebe, Paige, Leo, and Chris come through. The kids are on the floor. Phoebe, Paige, and Leo go to them.]
Phoebe/Paige/Leo: Hey, guys.
Leo: Quick, the portal's closing. We gotta get their men back through.
Chris: I'll get 'em.
(Chris orbs out. Phoebe picks up Phoenix, Paige picks up Persephone, and Leo picks up Wyatt.)
Leo: Hey, buddy. I got ya.
Phoebe: Okay, so if Evil Piper's in labor, that means our Piper must be, too. We gotta get to the hospital.
Paige: Okay, we have to get the bag. (They put the twins in the playpen.) Watch the twins too, please, Leo.
(They leave.)
[Cut to the front door. Phoebe and Paige step out. They see the sun shining, the sky clear, and a beautiful rainbow over it. The streets are clean. Children play nearby. The neighbors and workers on the street wave to the sisters.]
Worker: Hey, there! How're you doing?!
Paige: Okay, this is really strange.
Man: Hi, neighbor!
(Mrs. Noble is nearby.)
Mrs. Noble: Yoo-hoo! Yoo-hoo, ladies! Yoo-hoo! (She goes over to them.) I've been waiting for you.
Phoebe: Mrs. Noble, hi. I was just coming out to move the car.
Mrs. Noble: Oh, I know. You're a busy, busy, busy girl.
Paige: Yeah, see, it's our sisters, Prue and Piper. They're in labor and we're all a little crazy.
(The Patrol Officer and some neighbors come up to them.)
Phoebe: And I won't park there again, I promise.
Patrol Officer: That's right. I know you won't. (He takes out his gun and shoots Phoebe. She falls back and Paige catches her.) Wrongs must be righted.
Paige: Help!
Mrs. Noble: Have a super day!
Paige: Help! (Phoebe is on the ground.) Help! Somebody, help! (The Patrol Officer walks away.) Please, someone! (Mrs. Noble leaves.) Someone help! Please, someone! Someone! Help! Someone help! Leo! Leo! (An ice cream truck pulls up.) Someone help! Please, someone! Leo!