Hey, there! Chapter three is up! Yay! Warning: If you are an emotional person (like me) then you will probably find this chapter sad, and maybe a tear-jerker if you're listening to sad music or something. I don't know. I think it's sad. I didn't cry though, probably because I was the one writing it, but still. Consider yourself warned.

Chapter Three: Surrendering

It had been three weeks since the bowling incident. Since some clown decided to juggle three bowling balls, and ended up nailing poor Freddie Benson in the leg and wrist. The third ball gave the clown a necessary wakeup call by coming down on his own foot.

And as for Carly's plan to bring her and Sam closer together again as friends… that was self-consciously put on hold because suddenly Freddie was practically a walking disaster without someone to help him. And who better to do that than his girlfriend?

Once again Sam was put back into the same position, only now it was even worse. She had a choice of being alone after school and on weekends, or spending time with Carly and Freddie, the new inescapable package deal.

Sam, being dead set against being a third wheel and having to spend all of her free time with Freddie, resigned herself to being a loner everywhere outside of school.

However, Sam was in for the shock of her life when she came home from school one day.

It was a Friday afternoon, and Sam was about ready to puke after seeing all of Freddie and Carly's PDA. Not only that but she was tired, hungry, and irritable.

The next person who asks 'what's wrong' is getting kicked in the leg. Sam slammed the front door of their apartment building open and headed for the staircase.

"Hold it!" their landlord called out, stepping out of the utilities closet.

Sam ground her teeth together and slowly turned around. "What?" she asked of her landlord, Riley Lindsey.

"Where do you think you're going?" He crossed his arms gruffly over his worn flannel shirt.

"I live here, Riley. Remember?" Sam growled, not in the mood for games.

"Your mom didn't give you the heads up?"

"What 'heads up?'"

"We're fumigating your floor, and you're all being evacuated for the weekend." He reached behind him and into the closet and pulled out a crumpled piece of lavender stationary and a black duffel bag. "Here's your stuff."

No longer able to display any emotions, she reached for the bag that she recognized as her own and the note.

The note read:

Sam,

I'm sorry I forgot to tell you we were being evacuated. Whoops. Listen, I just finished the last chapter in my book (How to Start Caring More About Yourself), and it told me that as a reward, I should do something for myself. So, I decided to take a mini weekend vacation to Vegas with some friends. Yay! Again, sorry that I forgot to give you a little heads up about this. But don't worry, I left everything you'll need with Riley, and all of our furniture is in storage and safe from fumes. I know you and Carly are still pretty close, so you can stay with her and Spencer while I'm gone. I'm sure they'll be happy to have you.

See you on Monday,

Mom

Sam stiffly folded the note up and stuffed it into her pocket. She didn't even know what to do.

Was Carly even home? Would Carly and Spencer still be okay with her sleeping over? It wasn't like Sam and Carly were on the outs with each other but still… Sam hadn't been over for what felt like months. But besides that, what was up with her mom just taking off all of the sudden? Sure, she had done some pretty bad things as a mother, but she had never done this.

Stupid book! I always did hate books!

Riley just stood there staring at her like he expected her to cry or something. "Something wrong, kid?"

Sam looked up at him, shook her head, and walked robotically to the door and started towards Carly's apartment. She didn't even care that she was breaking her promise to kick the next person who asked her that. The anger was gone, and a new emotion was taking its place.

She walked down the street with a face that made people want to help her and cringe away from her at the same time. And for that, Sam was glad.

Sam hated ever showing anyone that she was vulnerable. If she did, she would just end up getting hurt and stepped on. And Sam would never let that happen again.

She wasn't surprised when it suddenly started pouring rain. It was Washington for crying out loud. But the only thing it reminded her of was exactly what she wasn't allowed to do. Ever.

When she reached Carly and Freddie's apartment building, she walked through the door slowly, and didn't even flinch when Lewbert yelled at her for tracking a little bit of dirt into his lobby.

Spencer answered the door when she knocked. "Hey, Sam. You know, Carly's not here, but-"

"I know. I was just wondering if it was okay if I stayed here for awhile while our apartment's being fumigated and junk." Sam spoke with tough casualness.

"You bet. You can crash in Carly's room like usual. You want some spaghetti tacos, or something? I was going to wait and make them closer to when Carly came home but I could start 'em now if you want."

Sam shook her head. "That's okay, Spence. I can wait. I'll just go drop this all in Carly's room."

"Okee-dokee. I'll be working on a sculpture in my room if you need me." Spencer started walking towards his room.

"Don't you usually work on those out here?"

"Yeah, but… it's kind of too big to be out here…" Spencer said, almost guiltily.

"What is it?" Sam tried to sound genuinely interested.

"A surprise!" And with that, Spencer turned and ran to his room.

"Okay, then," Sam said under her breath.

She ran up the stairs and immediately dumped her belongings on the floor and closed the door and locked it. Sam leaned against the back of the door and tried to control her emotions.

Her emotions eventually won the battle and she hid her face in her hands, sliding down to the floor with her knees brought up to her chest. She dug her fingernails into the soft carpet, trying to will the moisture in her eyes to go away.

Sam caught a glimpse of her mother's note during another struggle with her feelings, and that was the end of her tough charade.

Tears streamed down her face with no sign of stopping. They were all of the tears that she had always wanted to cry, but had never been released.

She cried for all of the times she'd liked a boy and would try to talk to him but they would just run away or flat out reject her, and then she would hide it from Carly, Freddie, and the world. For the hundreds of times her mom had done something without thinking or caring about Sam. And most of all, because the little voice in her head that kept telling her Carly and her were no longer friends wouldn't shut up.

Rain slanted down onto Carly's bedroom window with great force. Sam's tears had the same speed.

She wrapped her arms around her legs and slowly rocked back and forth, biting her lip, hard, trying to get a grip on herself.

The little voice in her head gave her a verbal slap by saying Carly no longer needed a best friend now that she had Freddie. She would never need Sam ever again. Her cheek burned as if she'd truly been slapped.

Sam choked out another sob, completely disgusted by her own tears. She wanted to do something to make that voice shut up once and for all. But she couldn't. She couldn't do anything to a voice that was only in her head.

Shaking from her sobs, Sam pulled herself up to a standing position.

She caught sight of herself in a white-framed mirror and covered her eyes with already-wet hands. The reflection showed someone with a red, splotchy face and leaking eyes. It was Sam, looking horribly vulnerable, weak, and pitifully hopeless.

Her rough demeanor had pushed everyone but Carly away. Without Carly… she was alone in the world, in her head, and in her heart. Her heart that now had one more hole stabbed in it.

One of her strongest feelings was to hit something or throw something, but everything around her was precious… delicate… breakable… and Carly's.

Sam yanked her hands away from her face, suddenly hating her own existence. She hated feeling like nothing but a burden and an afterthought to everyone around her.

That's all she was too. Her mother's burden and Carly's afterthought. And the thorn in Freddie's side. No one needed her. No one wanted her. She was just getting in the way.

No one else should have to suffer but me.

Sam stumbled across the room on weak, shaky knees until she came to Carly's giant, glass window.

With one last stomach wrenching sob, she opened the window with all of the strength she had left, and completely surrendered.

*sniffles* Okay... that was chapter three. Don't start crying though (bad joke), because after writing this chapter I realized this story actually probably has two chapters left to it. Yay! And as for the ending note of Chapter Three: Surrendering... I'll let you figure out what you think happened at the very end. I am going to be good, and not reveal anything until Chapter Four comes out. Or maybe Chapter Five. I don't know. Keep reading and reviewing! And thanks for reading! Bye!