I don't know if I like this chapter or not. It started out how I intended, and then it turned into something else. I hope you all enjoy and are able to stomach the fact that I repeat phrases all the time. :P
Disclaimer: I own nada.
"No."
Sakura stared at Sasuke blankly for a moment before reigning in her temper.
"What do you mean NO?"
Sasuke, being Sasuke, looked down his nose at her. So he's still a haughty bastard, eh?
"I mean what I said. No, I will not spar with you. It's a waste of my time as there is nothing to gain from a fight I know I will win."
What an uptightbastardsonofabitchstickuphisassjackass!!! She had decided, yesterday after talking with Ino, that she would wait a day before issuing her invitation to spar with Sasuke. Now it seemed that her waiting had been for naught, as Sasuke was still a fucking pretentious bitch.
"I can't seem to be hearing you properly. Are you trying to insinuate that sparring with me is a waste of your, ahem, 'valuable' time?"
Sakura was going to kill him if his response was anything below satisfactory.
"Isn't that what I just said?"
She was going to kill him. Sneak behind him when he least expected it, and pummel the living daylights out of him. And if that didn't kill him, she'd strangle him. Violently.
"So, let me get this straight for a minute…You won't spar me because it would be a waste of your time?"
Sasuke stared at her.
"And why is sparring me a waste of time?"
"Sparring you is not a challenge in any way. I could crush you easily."
Not a challenge?! How could he even say that? Wasn't she, Haruno Sakura, the apprentice to Tsunade the Hokage? Hadn't she defeated Sasori? (And, yes, she had help, but she was an integral part to that plan!) Hadn't she trained and trained for years to get stronger and better? She'd been one of the first rookies to apply for jounin status—and get it.
And Sasuke had the gall to say she wasn't worth the effort?
"You are such a bastard! Where do you get off saying I'm not a challenge, huh? You don't even know me anymore, Sasuke. Do you remember that? How it's been nearly ten years since you left? Because I certainly do. And while you were spending your time being primped and pampered to be taken over by the freaky snake guy, I was training. Hard."
Sakura stepped closer to Sasuke, who still looked at her blankly. Filled with sudden and uncontrollable wrath, she poked him in the chest roughly.
"I am not the same girl I was when I was twelve, Sasuke. I don't care about you, especially not like I thought I did when I was a child. Can you get that through your head? I've changed—a lot. And you haven't changed a goddamn bit!"
She thought she saw something change in his eyes when she mentioned how she felt for him when she was twelve, but it was probably her imagination projecting emotions and human reactions onto his face.
"It doesn't seem like you've changed much, because you're still annoying. And I don't waste my time with annoyances." He turned around and started walking away.
How could he say that? How could Sasuke call her annoying when he had to be the most annoying person on the planet? Sakura fumed inwardly.
So maybe she was a little nervous about sparring him. Yes, she had trained for nearly a decade to change herself from the weakling she had been. But how could she be sure it was enough? Sasuke had been away for so long, and no matter what mannerisms he maintained from before he left, that didn't prove he was the same person.
He had killed numerous people in cold blood for the sake of becoming stronger. What's to say he wouldn't treat her with the same disregard? He could kill her, and she knew it. And, as much as she hated to have to admit it, Sakura was scared of him. She was completely and utterly terrified at the thought of what he could do to her.
I am not a coward!
Yes, Sakura was afraid. But wasn't it common sense? Her inner survival instinct? Her subconscious accepted the fact that Sasuke was dangerous and could do awful, unspeakable things to her and she wouldn't be able to do a damn thing about it.
I am not. A. Coward.
Sometimes Sakura hated her fear of being afraid.
"Hey, Sasuke!" She sprinted to catch up with him. When he'd stopped without turning around, she tapped him on the shoulder and waved a hand in his face.
"Yeah, I get it, I'm annoying, I am also a human and would like to be shown the decency of being looked at when I'm talking."
For unknown reasons, Sasuke turned around.
And that's when Sakura punched him in the face.
"I AM NOT WEAK YOU STUPID BASTARD!"
Her survival instincts seemed to kick in again because she found herself sprinting off as fast as possible in the opposite direction of Sasuke.
Unfortunately, Sasuke was faster than he had been when they were twelve and he caught her in about a minute.
"What the hell was that for??"
Wow, Sasuke looked PISSED! Also his eye was totally swollen! Sakura would have to give herself a pat on the back later for a job well done. Seems the silly Uchiha heir let her fly under his radar, and boy was he paying for it!
"Whatever could you mean, Sasuke?" she chirped at him, plastering an innocent smile on her face that was slowly morphing itself into a full out grin as the skin around his eye began changing colors.
"Don't be fucking coy. Answer the goddamn question!"
"Look, maybe if you bothered to take me seriously this wouldn't have happened. But no, the almighty Uchiha Sasuke just can't seem to take me seriously. And since you refuse to see me as a threat, I had to pose a threat to you. And I did, didn't I? Who'd have thought that a lowly peasant like myself would get a hit in on his High Lord Sasuke!"
Sakura laughed and laughed and she laughed some more, tears of mirth dotting her eyes as she took in the irritated look on Sasuke's face.
"Oh, Sasuke, don't pout at me! I'm sowwy if I huwt your feewings! Could you ever find it in yourself to forgive me?" She clasped her hands together and looked at him beseechingly while batting her eyelashes.
She felt like she was twinkling, she was acting so angelic. Was it just her, or was there a golden glow coming from around her head? She should be sprouting wings any minute now, really.
Sasuke grunted impatiently and Sakura was forcibly removed from her reverie.
"Sorry, what did you say? I was too busy basking in my victory." She gave him a sunny smile.
"Hn."
"You interrupted my wonderful daydream to hn at me? Honestly? You have got to be kidding me with this shit, Sasuke!"
"I said I still won't spar with you! When did you get so vulgar?"
"Why won't you spar with me? And it probably happened sometime between when you left and right now. That's just a rough estimate, though, so don't take my word for it or anything."
He rolled his eyes and smirked at her.
"Because the only way you'll ever hit me is with cheap shots like that one back there." He tossed his head in the direction they'd come from while Sakura fumed.
"Cheap shot?! You're one to talk about cheap shots! Telling me I'm still annoying and a waste of your time…Well, you're still an asshole!"
She fixed him with her fiercest glare and scowled menacingly, anything to make him understand how undeniably pissed she was at him.
"How old are you again? Because it sounds like you're reverting to your twelve year old self if that's the best insult you can sling at me."
"Sometimes you are such a jackass, Sasuke! Did you know that about yourself? Because it's not exactly a trait women find appealing in a man…Although you were with Orochimaru for quite some time, and you definitely could've switched sides while you were there—"
"If you're hinting at what I think you are, then I must insist you're quite incorrect. I can't help it if your particular looks have never interested me in any special way…or at all, really."
Was that supposed to hurt? Because it totally didn't. Not one little bit. There was not a teeny, tiny, itty bitty speck of care in Sakura's body for what he just said, absolutely none at all.
How did he always manage to get to her?
"You can't seem to accept that I'm not the twelve year old girl you once barely knew, Sasuke. I am almost a completely different person. I wasn't expecting in any way for us to become friends when you came back—"
Sasuke snorted and Sakura's eyebrow twitched. She needed to salvage her pride, dammit!"
"But I at least thought we might get along a little. Clearly I was totally wrong, because as long as you have that massive stick up your ass I'm not going to be able to handle your presence. And, really, I'm fine with that. We're both different people, different from when you left and too different from each other to get to know each other better. And that's that. I think I just wanted you to acknowledge me, for once in your goddamned life, just accept that I am strong. Strong enough to fend for myself and others at the same time."
Shaking her head, she took a step back and looked at the area directly above his left shoulder.
"I've changed. I know I've changed. But I have stupidly waited my whole life for you to validate me, and make my claims legitimate. Because if you could admit I was stronger, that meant everyone else would have to as well. And for some reason I have stupidly clung to the thought that once you came back, you would recognize that I was better."
Sakura took another step back and looked to the side.
"And maybe that particular dream won't ever be fulfilled, but I won't let it get to me. Maybe I'm stupid and annoying, but at least I'm not a fucking asshole like you!"
That's when she swooped in close and punched him in the other eye.
And then she ran off to drown her sorrows and broken hopes in alcohol, because for all the medicine in the world there was no other cure for a trampled spirit.
xxx
Hours later, Sakura stumbled home in a drunken haze. It wasn't the first time she'd fumbled her way to her apartment when she wasn't quite what one would call sober, and it certainly wouldn't be the last. The one difference from all those other times, however, was the presence of a certain blonde in her bedroom.
"Why are you in my fucking house, Naruto? Get the fuck out, please, I don't have time to deal with this. I had a shift at the hospital tomorrow morning and I'm going to need to sleep off this hangover."
She pulled off her sandals slowly, making sure to lay them on the ground carefully. Slowly she dragged herself over to her bed, where she plopped onto her covers and shoved Naruto off.
"Hey! What was that for?"
"Naruto, shut up before I castrate you. I am going to sleep and I will see you tomorrow, good night—"
"I know what happened with Sasuke today."
Sakura's hand stilled on its quest of pulling back her blankets so she could slip under them. Closing her eyes, she took a deep breath and turned her slightly unfocused gaze on Naruto's prone form at the side of her bed.
"I don't want to discuss it, Naruto, you understand? These past two days have been awful enough, thank you, without having to relive them. It's not as if I haven't been mulling it over in my brain all day anyways."
She flipped over again, this time moving too fast and biting back a hiss. Naruto was up in a flash, positioning her with her back resting on her pillows and swiftly and efficiently pulling her covers from beneath her and tucking her in under them.
Sakura closed her eyes and smiled a bit. "Thanks, Naruto."
"No problem, Sakura! See, this benefits me because now I have you where I want you: at my mercy!"
He grinned at her and crossed his eyes in a way that would've made her laugh if she knew it might not bounce off the inside of her skull. He sat down on the edge of her bed and his expression sobered.
"Sakura, I know you don't want to talk about this, but you have to. It's kind of obvious you've been holding those feelings inside for awhile, and I wish I was observant enough to have noticed them on my own. Alas, I did not notice them until news spread around town about your little showdown with His Royal Highness, the Prince of Brooding. However!"
Here he bounced up a bit and pointed at her.
"I have decided I am going to make up for my blindness by interrogating you and making you feel better! When you didn't answer your door when I came by earlier, I assumed you were ignoring me—much like you are now—and so I kind of might have broken in. But I didn't actually break anything, I promise! Anyways, I just wanted to tell you Sakura that I have always thought you were strong and capable of taking care of everyone you've ever encountered in your life."
Sakura felt her eyes filling with tears, but she held them back so she wouldn't upset Naruto. She really, really did not want Naruto to see her crying, because she was strong, like he said. And strong people don't cry, even when they hear what they've been waiting for years to hear.
He cradled her face in his hand and smoothed her cheek with his thumb.
"It's okay to cry, you know. I won't think any less of you…if anything, it just emphasizes how great you are, because only someone who's really smart can accept that sometimes they need to stop acting so tough all the time and just let things happen."
Oh Kami, she was such a loser. Who cared what Naruto said, nobody else ever cried like she did. Crying was what the Old Sakura did, and she was the New and Improved Sakura Who Definitely Didn't Cry Ever and Certainly Not in Front of Naruto.
"Really, Naruto, thank you for saying that, but could you please go? I can't…do this. Not now, maybe not ever. I just really thought things would be different. I always kind of hoped that if we weren't going to get along it would be an understood-from-the-beginning kind of thing, and not an I-made-an-ass-out-of-myself kind of thing. I want better than this, hell, I deserve better than this, and for some reason I'm not getting it. I never get it. Somewhere someone thinks it is funny to keep giving Haruno Sakura the short end of the stick, but one of these days I am going to snap."
Turning her head, she caught Naruto's worried gaze.
"And then I'll be gone. Just, poof! Disappeared. Gone. I'll pull an all-nighter and then…maybe then, everyone will realize how much they appreciate me, and how much they need me around. But it'll be too late…"
Sakura trailed off and pushed herself deeper under the covers, turning her back on him.
"You both left, Naruto. And you both took for granted the fact that I would be here, in Konoha, waiting for you to return. I would appreciate it if you could leave now, Naruto. I'm not exactly sober, and I don't want to say anything more before I make you hate me too. I'll see you tomorrow?"
He nodded, still silent, and padded out of her room, remembering to shut the door behind him quietly.
Part of Sakura wanted Naruto to suffer the way she had, waiting day by agonizing day for one of them—either of them, not just Sasuke—to come home. Her conscience usually kicked in then, and reminded her that friends don't wish that kind of anguish on their very best friends in the world.
But here, laying in the dark quiet of her bedroom, Sakura could finally admit to herself that she did.