Chapter Eleven
"Stay with the dead, I'm joining the living."
As luck would have it, Christmas Eve coincided with Olivia's visiting day and it thrilled her to bits. God knew she hated Christmas but something had happened after she decorated with Shilo. She felt mysteriously light inside, as if a weight had been lifted. She'd begun to smile more often and that elicited a few knowing smirks from the Graverobber. Even he couldn't kill her good mood. The holidays were upon her and yet she didn't feel depressed. She had a great kid to hang out with and spoil with some ridiculous presents, not to mention her father who had for some reason begun to trip over himself to help her out. Nathan had done most of the grunt work of decorating and when she'd asked what she was allowed to give Shilo for Christmas, he'd said she could get whatever she wanted. It was actually a little spooky. Olivia wanted to know why he was suddenly being so nice to her but she was afraid it might have to do with pity. After all, he knew her sob story about her scars. Maybe he was just a bleeding heart.
On Christmas Eve, however, none of her speculation or uncertainty mattered. She refused to let it matter. This was going to be the best Christmas Eve she'd in years. Olivia would have a great time with Shilo and maybe even Nathan. She shifted the presents she had in her arms so she could lean against the buzzer. It had taken her weeks to figure out what to get Shilo and now the anticipation of seeing her reaction was just about killing her. They'd agreed to exchange gifts tonight since Olivia had work in the morning. There were always suicides after Christmas Eve. All the morgues got a few of the bodies, Olivia's included. Naturally, she didn't tell Shilo the details of why she had to miss Christmas morning. She wanted to be honest with the kid but there's honest and then there's too much information.
There was a harsh buzz and finally the gate swung open. Olivia stepped through then stared as Nathan came through the front door. That never happened. He always opened the door for her. He didn't come out to meet her. Was there some sort of emergency? Was something wrong with Shilo? Oh, God!
"Nathan, what is it?" she asked, nearly running to meet him. It was his turn to stare at her in confusion.
"What do you mean?"
"You came outside. You never do that. Is Shilo - ?"
"She's fine," he told her quickly, catching onto the fact that she was beginning to panic. "Well, she's a little excited and I'm worried she'll over do it but other than that…"
"Then what are you doing out here?" Olivia asked. He cleared his throat.
"I wanted to help. Your arms are full." Nathan held out his own arms to take the packages and she passed them to him, mostly out of shock. Chivalry was dead. So what the hell was this?
"Thanks," she mumbled. He gestured for her to go ahead of him and although his arms were full he still managed to get the door open for her before she could touch the handle. Olivia tried very hard not to stare like an idiot but it wasn't easy. Not only was he acting strange but he looked excellent. She thought wearing green on Christmas was cliché but his vest was a dark enough shade that it wasn't too awful. Besides, it made his green eyes practically glow. Those eyes could hypnotize a lesser woman.
"You certainly took me at my word when I said you could get Shilo whatever you wanted," Nathan commented as he set the presents under the tree. "That one box is almost half your size. Just what did you get her?"
"That would be telling," she pointed out as she unbuttoned her coat and hung it up by the door. Nathan made a quiet choking sound. She turned around to see him staring at her dress. She cursed quietly in her head. She thought only short skirts would put Nathan into that awkwardly fascinated state. Apparently a burgundy stretch velvet dress could to it, too. It was long-sleeved with a kick pleat on the right side, clearly defining her waist. Once again, not much cleavage, but he was staring anyway. "I know it might be a little formal but it's been a while since I had a proper Christmas Eve."
"No, no, you're very… I mean, the color is very flattering and the cut is, uh, quite… flattering," he choked out. Olivia had to bite her lip to keep from grinning. He was adorable when he got like this.
"Thanks. That was very… flattering," she replied, a tiny smile sneaking out after all. He smiled back and she felt something flutter in her chest. Olivia quickly looked away from him. "Well, I'm guessing that Shilo hasn't made an appearance yet because she's eavesdropping. Am I right, Shilo?" she called up. A groan sounded from the stairs.
"Spoilsport!" The teenager came loping down the stairs, short white dress flopping around her knees. Despite her disappointment at being discovered she hugged the older woman.
"Twerp," Olivia retorted with a grin as she wrapped her arms around the slender girl. This was exactly what she'd been hoping for all week. The house was warm with Christmas lights and decorations. There was even the scent of pine, most likely not from the actual tree.
"We're going to do everything right!" Shilo said, pulling back so she could see Olivia's face. "We're going to sing carols, watch black and white movies and eat tree-shaped cookies. Ooh, and presents!"
"Shilo, please…"
"Breathe, Shilo…" Nathan and Olivia both paused as they realized they had spoken at the same time. Shilo groaned.
"Oh, no, not two of you! Dad was bad enough on his own. Livvy, you can't join his side." Olivia lifted a brow, lips twisting in a wicked smirk.
"But isn't this what you wanted, Shilo? What with all your matchmaking…"
"What matchmaking?" she asked innocently. Olivia snickered.
"What matchmaking? 'Dad's a great cook, Livvy. Dad's a great singer, Livvy. Maybe you and dad could go out to a restaurant some time so you could tell me what it's like. What do you mean there's too much mistletoe, Livvy?'" she quoted. Shilo blushed.
"Oh. That."
"Mistletoe, huh?" Nathan asked, coming to stand at Olivia's shoulder. "I missed that." He wasn't touching her but she could feel the heat radiating from his body. She tried to ignore it but the sensation wasn't going away.
"Yes, well, the moral of the story is that you should always be careful what you wish for since you just might get it." She moved subtly away from Nathan and wrapped an arm around Shilo. "Let's go see that black and white movie, shall we?" They had barely started on the stairs when Shilo looked over her shoulder.
"Aren't you coming, dad?" Olivia experienced an array of emotions in about five seconds. She felt frustrated, hopeful, trapped and eager. She prayed she kept all that off her face.
"Yeah, Nathan," she said lightly. "Why don't you join us?" He smiled in a way that made her deeply suspicious. It seemed a little too satisfied for her taste.
"I like that idea."
The movie was, of course, the classic It's a Wonderful Life. Olivia hadn't actually seen it for years while Shilo hadn't seen it at all. Before Olivia she'd viewed black and white movies with some contempt. All it had taken for her to change her mind was Olivia saying how Christmas had never really felt like Christmas without It's a Wonderful Life. Thankfully it was still around and Nathan hadn't had any trouble picking it up. They set up in Shilo's room. Shilo sat on the floor, propped up by pillows, while Nathan and Olivia both brought in chairs. Usually Olivia would take the floor but her dress was not floor-friendly.
Naturally Shilo was taken with the film almost from the beginning but it was the romance that won her over. She let out a little sigh when George talked about giving Mary the moon. Olivia chuckled.
"Don't get your hopes up, honey. No one talks like that anymore." Nathan glanced at her, a mildly interested look on his face.
"They don't?"
"Definitely not. I've been around enough to know," she informed him. In the world they lived in, no man went on and on about the things he would do for a woman unless it had to do with sex. Even then it wasn't particularly poetic or even appealing. The goal was instant gratification, not romance.
"Ah, yes, I remember you saying something about your experience before," he commented with a superficially innocent tone. Olivia immediately thought of when she'd pinned him to the wall and talked about how she hadn't gotten any in a long, long time. She stared at him, completely dumbfounded. She suspected she looked like a flabbergasted idiot and his smirk confirmed it. "Edgy?" he asked, using the same word she'd used all those weeks ago as he looked at her over the rims of his glasses. The fluttering had returned to her chest but this time it had spread to her stomach.
"I'm fine," she mumbled, staring determinedly at the movie and not glancing at him once during the rest of the film. That didn't mean she didn't think about him, though. She barely paid attention to the screen as her thoughts raced. Nathan wasn't hitting on her. No, it wasn't anything that obvious. He was flirting. It was subtle, elegant and disconcerting. Their relationship was shifting. Again. They'd gone from being enemies to having a weird, sexually charged friendship. He treated her like glass after he found out about her face but now he'd started teasing her. What was this?
She wondered about that throughout the day as they discussed the movie over roast beef sandwiches. Shilo hadn't been kidding when she said her dad was a good cook. The sandwiches were amazing. Shilo was only leaving hers alone because she's stuffed herself with cookies while her father hadn't been paying attention. Olivia maintained that she hadn't noticed either when Nathan asked. He hadn't believed her.
"We still have to sing carols," Shilo reminded them once they'd finished eating. Olivia smiled.
"You sing away, kid. Knock yourself out."
"You don't sing?" she asked, a shocked look on her face. It hadn't occurred to her that Olivia might not be able to do anything she wanted.
"Oh, yeah, I sing but I have a strict policy. I only sing around deaf people." Shilo let out a disappointed sigh.
"It doesn't seem right not to sing all together."
"I'm sure you're better than you think," Nathan added, the grin on his face unmistakable. He was more interested in hearing Olivia sing than maintaining the Christmas spirit. She glared at him.
"Oh, so now you're backing her up? Keep in mind, buddy, I know where you sleep at night." That maybe wasn't the best choice of words since his eyes got that speculative gleam and Olivia had to look away. She got out of singing, barely, and they moved to the present portion of the evening.
"Oh, my God, Livvy! This thing is huge. What's inside?" Shilo asked as she picked out the biggest present first. Of course, she asked this while tearing off the wrapping paper so Olivia decided to let Shilo discover the answer for herself. "Oh, it's a display case with… butterflies? Wow, that blue one is amazing. Look at the color! It's all shimmery."
"Dead insects?" Nathan inquired, glancing at Olivia. She smirked.
"The book-shaped present explains it." Shilo immediately went for the book-shaped present and ripped it open to reveal a book titled Insects. She began flipping through it, reading excerpts out loud in an excited voice.
"This is so awesome! Dad, look at all the types of bugs. Hey, there's my butterfly," she squealed, immediately reading about it. Nathan looked back at Olivia who was feeling very pleased with herself indeed.
"I believe you just turned my daughter into a bug fanatic," he noted, more than a little impressed. She smiled.
"What can I say? I'm good."
"You're the best," Shilo corrected, flying up to hug Olivia tightly. "This is the best hobby ever. Not that I didn't like quilting. It's just that bugs are all so different and there's only so many ways you can stitch. That reminds me!" Shilo darted back to the tree, picked up a lumpy package and handed it to Olivia. "Merry Christmas!"
"You didn't have to do this," she began to say as she unwrapped it. Then a scarf fell into her hands and she went silent. Shilo bit her lip, unnerved.
"Er, I know it's not perfect. I've only had a few weeks practice but I worked on it every minute I could and dad got me a book on it so I'd know what I was doing without spoiling the surprise for you." The scarf was wider at one end that it was at the other. The scarf had a color scheme that could cause seizures. The scarf was the best scarf Olivia had ever been given.
"It's perfect," she whispered, voice breaking as she said it. "This is… It's great, Shilo. It's so great." She pulled the kid in for another hug, squeezing her eyes shut to keep the tears at bay. Nathan gave them a minute as he wandered casually over to the tree.
"Shi, you missed one," he said once some time had passed. He picked up the small colorfully wrapped cube and made to hand it to Shilo. Olivia cleared her throat.
"Actually, uh, that one's for you." Both Wallaces stared at her. She shifted uneasily. "Well, I was spending all this time in antique shops looking for the right display case and I sort of found something that made me think of your father. And, besides, he deserves a present for putting up with me."
"Thank you," Nathan said, glancing at her as he slowly unwrapped his present. Shilo frowned when she saw it.
"What is that?"
"A Rubik's cube," her dad said as he turned it over in his hand. "It's a very old puzzle. Nearly impossible to solve, too." His eyes met Olivia's. "And it reminded you of me?"
"Yeah," she replied quietly. "Just another puzzle." She winced. That had been way too cheesy. It was time to retreat. "Well, I should get going. I'm going to have an early day tomorrow."
"Are you sure?" Shilo didn't want her to leave. No surprises there. However, it looked like Nathan wasn't eager to see her go, either. That was a bad sign for her plan to put a little distance between herself and the family unit.
"Yes, unfortunately," she replied while wrapping her new scarf around her neck. "But you've got plenty to do. I expect you to tell me everything there is to know about insects next week." Shilo grinned.
"It's a deal." She hugged Olivia again before returning to her book. Nathan went with her to the door, watching quietly as she pulled her coat off the hook.
"I didn't get you anything," he said quietly.
"It's okay. I know I'm a pain in the ass." She turned around and realized they were much closer than she'd expected. The fluttering returned once more. She stared into his eyes, thinking that he really was handsome in an adorable, long-lasting sort of way. He would be adorable for years to come and she would probably be attracted to him for just as long.
"You aren't a pain in the ass," he corrected with an earnest smile. "And I feel guilty." Was there anything wrong with a little Christmas kiss? Something small, innocent. Just… nothing. She went for it.
Unfortunately, Nathan went for it, too. This resulted in the two of them bumping faces by mistake. Olivia jerked back, pressing a hand to her forehead and wincing. Then she giggled. That had been so pathetic and bad and clear sign that this was not what the universe intended for them to do. "Wow, okay, that didn't work out," she said lightly.
"I'm sorry about - "
"No problem," she cut him off before he could say anything to make the situation more awkward. "It's really no problem. Merry Christmas, Nathan." She ducked out the door, hearing a faint 'Merry Christmas, Olivia' as she retreated.
It was ten minutes later that she felt something in her jacket pocket that didn't belong. Her fingers grasped the object and pulled it out into the light. A butterfly hair clasp with mother-of-pearl wings sparkled at her bemused face. Nathan had gotten her a present after all. Olivia ran her thumb over the butterfly, thinking about the irony. She had gotten Shilo a butterfly and he had given her one as well. With a frustrated groan she closed her eyes. What the hell did the signs mean now?