After what seemed like an eternity in the hallway, the door was finally opened by a smiling Haruhi.

"It's perfect!"

And what exactly would I find on the other side of this door? I think I felt beads of sweat caused by anticipation go down my neck at the suspense of the whole matter. What had Haruhi dressed Nagato in, and what made it perfect for the diminutive beauty? Could Haruhi have dressed her up as an alien? No, that would be too obvious, wouldn't it? I doubt even Haruhi would waste her time on such an idea when it came to dressing Nagato up. Then again, that girl had entirely different standards from the rest of us mere mortals, time travellers, espers and aliens.

As Haruhi stepped aside to allow me back into the room, holding out a hand like an artist presenting their latest masterpiece, I allowed my eyes to take their time and scan what would most likely be an unbelievable sight. The very fact that it was Nagato doing cosplay instead of Asahina-san for a change, had me quivering in anticipation.

Standing in the middle of the room like a mannequin was Nagato, just as expressionless as ever with her hands hanging limply at her sides. It wasn't exactly anything mind-blowingly original, it was in fact, a sort of pastiche of pretty much everything that had come before from Haruhi for outfits to wear, except taken up a gear or two. I'm not entirely sure what she was supposed to be, a waitress, a shepherd, a maid? She had a short, frilly skirt reaching her knees, which were covered by long white socks – stockings? Some sort of dark…coat, her cardigan? No, it was too tight. A grey corset under it, a white shirt under that with slightly puffy… I think it had a hint of what people call a Victorian-style – or is it Lolita? Umm, uh…

Damn it, I just don't have the vocabulary to describe fancy female clothing. I just can't do the thing any justice at all, no matter how much I try to describe it. I'm just a guy and all I really know is that it was frilly with little bow ties appropriately attached, evenly black and white, with many layers to it, like a cake or something, and Nagato looked great in it. Spectacular, actually. The cute little grey cat ears didn't hurt either.

"C'mon, Yuki, do something! Show it off!" Haruhi exclaimed expectantly while leering at me like some sort of maniac.

Nagato gave Haruhi a blank look before she once again turned to look at me with what could have been considered an inquisitive look if you were familiar with the faint subtleties of Nagato's face. Why do you keep doing that? You don't need my permission or anything!

"Pose! Do a sexy pose!" Haruhi shouted, starting to sound rather impatient.

Once more, the little girl blinked. I was starting to become rather unsettled by the slowly increasing amount of blinking to tell you the truth. Nagato spread her arms and looked down, no doubt inspecting her new appearance just as eagerly as we were.

"No, not like that! Remember what I have Mikuru do whenever I get a new costume for her? Like that! Do it like Mikuru!" Haruhi stamped her foot down like an angry child.

For a moment, Nagato stood perfectly still while her gaze sort of unfocused. Then she turned her hips slightly while raising her hands behind her head. Her gentle, little lips parted slightly, as if she were about to sigh, but no sound escaped them. She cocked the knee closest to us, while puffing up her chest and arching her back. It was all rather sexy, I must admit. If the likes of Taniguchi and others had been here, they would probably have been foaming at the mouth. Luckily I had more self-control than they would have had in this situation; I merely gaped at her, awestruck by the lovely vision.

Haruhi took out a camera.

It's funny how these two girls are the complete and perfect opposites of each other. One is an emotional typhoon who can't conceal all the crazy things she feels while the other is apparently emotionless, never really revealing what goes on underneath that cute, white, enigmatic face.

"Perfect!!" Haruhi squealed, giddy at her own success in transforming the pretty Nagato into a magnificent beauty, worthy of having a constellation named after her in the heavens. I must remember to clean up my jaw from the floor after this is all done.

The flashes and clicks of the camera brought me back to reality from my stupor. Once again, I am forced to make a violent weather related simile about Haruhi's behaviour: She was spinning around like a tornado as she took pictures from various angles, while the hapless Nagato was stuck in the eye of it all.

"Yes, yes, yes! That pose is just perfect! The way your back arches so elegantly! How did you come up with it? Never mind. Do a spin! No wait! Jump and twirl around like daisy caught in a strong wind! No, on second thought! Grab your leg, balancing on one foot and lean forward while… No! Stay in the original pose, it's perfect!"

As Haruhi was giving useless, sometimes contradictory orders while snapping pictures like a crazed, starving paparazzi working for food, Nagato had remained absolutely still in her original pose, staring at me. Her gaze was intently focused on my face for some weird reason. Yes, Nagato, you look fantastic. Stop burning my soul with your deeper-than-space eyes!

"Kyon, clean your dropped jaw from the Brigade's hallowed floors before you drool all over the place!"

In my defence, I hadn't been drooling… much. It was more of a watering in my mouth like when you wait hungrily for an extravagant meal. Damn, I'm starting to sound like a sex offender with my excuses, aren't I?

"No time for daydreaming! Where are the others?!"

I took a look at my watch. "Most likely still in class," I answered dutifully to the Brigade's tyrant of a leader.

"Hmph," Haruhi huffed indignantly. "Well, seeing as those two won't be here for a while, I guess it's only fair that Yuki takes on Mikuru's role as the maid, seeing as she's already filling out her costume for today. I'll take my tea with milk and a hint of lemon, thank you very much! I don't think I've tried a combination like that yet."

Haruhi strode to her desk, and flopped down into her chair, attacking the computer's mouse, relentlessly clicking away, no doubt checking the SOS-Brigade's website and email.

I turned to look at Nagato, who was still in her sexy pose, staring at me.

"Uhm, you okay? You know you can stop posing now, right?"

"Yes," Nagato answered my question like it was an order, slowly lowering her hands and adjusting her posture like a robot. However, she remained there, standing in the middle of the room, still with her eyes fixed on my face. I even shuffled slightly to the left and right to make sure of the last proposition.

"If you don't want to, I can make Haruhi her tea," I offered to help courageously in a very gentlemanly way.

"That will not be necessary," Nagato answered, and turned an exact 90 degrees on her heels and walked silently to the side of the room to prepare the tea like an apparition.

Well, okay, I guess I'll just make myself useful and… not get in anyone's way. I took my usual seat, sitting back and giving my overheated brain some time to cool down. After a few minutes of getting into my usual state of mind, I got rather bored, and no, that isn't my usual state of mind… usually. I looked around to see what the two girls I was currently wasting my time with were doing to kill it themselves.

Haruhi had a frustrated look on her face, her lips pouting cutely and her eyebrows lowered at a declining angle. One of her feet was lounging on top of the other, wagging like a dog's tail. All in all, not a bad sight to see, I must admit. The few quiet moments that involved Haruhi were like pearls; rare and beautiful in their splendid scarcity.

I spotted Nagato's book on the table against which I was once again propping my head with my hand. Inconspicuously I tried to peer at its mysterious covers. I definitely didn't want Haruhi to get any strange ideas about this miraculous book. Who knows what might follow if she got her hands on it?

Unfortunately it was only the back of the book I could see, and the strange, long words which I couldn't understand even if my life depended on it weren't any help at all in figuring out what the story was about. I didn't even know if it was one of Nagato's favourites, a sci-fi story. From what little I was able to piece together, there was a question regarding… dreaming about electrified/electrical sheep? Okay, that couldn't have been right… I can barely understand it after all. But I certainly hope it was "electrical" and not the other possible alternative I had in my mind. Nagato probably wouldn't read a book about farming, if it indeed was about such matters. Or maybe it was a psychology book. On the other hand, I doubt she'd ever not read a book based on its contents, whatever they may be. Nagato read everything.

Seeing as there was no way I could figure out what the book was without alerting Haruhi to its existence, I once again allowed my bored vision to wander. Haruhi had changed positions now; her legs were on the chair, touching her butt (no, I wasn't actually seeing anything I shouldn't be seeing, the desk prevented that, I'm just assuming since her knees are now very close to her shoulders), as she typed with the wrath of a Viking warrior on the luckless keyboard. Her tongue was sticking out, seemingly in concentration. While Nagato on the other hand…

Nagato was carefully measuring water into the teapot, a thin silvery sliver of water trickled down into the pot from a cup she had filled with water. She stared intently at the tiny trickle of water, as if hypnotized by the sight. It was like she was counting that exactly the right amount of H2O molecules went into the pot.

As I watched this amazing display of patience, it happened, something that chilled me to my very core. Nagato's hand trembled. The silvery stream quivered as uncertainly as her hand for the briefest moment and then returned back to its steady flow. Even so, that moment felt like an eternity as I watched it with absolute horror.

Ok, maybe that's a slight hyperbole, but I want to make it absolutely certain that things like this do not happen when Nagato Yuki is involved. Still, it was extremely unsettling to watch for me personally.

As I continued staring at her intently, Nagato's head dropped slightly and her shoulders tensed, but other than that, nothing else apparently changed as she finished pouring the water into the pot.

Needless to say, I was freaking out at this point.