Title: Comedy of Errors
Category: Flame of Recca
Author: khay
Language: English
Rating: T
Genre: Romance/Humor
Words: 1,558
A/N: For this story, I will be heavily borrowing from Jennifer Crusie's Manhunting and Cyndi Haynes & Dale Edwards' 2002 Things To Do On A Date. I'm looking forward to hearing from you!
Summary: Alternate Universe. Fuuko Kirisawa braves the dating scene and finds out just how many frogs a girl have to kiss before she can find her prince.
Standard disclaimers apply (there is a reason this is called fanfiction).
Beta-Reader: The awesome Maya-nii (any mistakes that may be found here are mine).
Comedy of Errors
Chapter 5
Things to do on a date # 353: Model your new clothes to get your date's opinion.
Mikagami resisted the very strong urge to rub his hands and cackle like an old-school anime villain. Not only would such actions be very out of character, it would also cause him to spill the designer coffee inside the tumbler he was holding. So he contented himself by simply checking the time on his very expensive watch. Then, a smile, which could only be described as pure evil, crossed his lips.
It's show time.
Mikagami walked up the steps of the house and pressed the doorbell. After a few seconds passed without any acknowledgment from the homeowner, he repeatedly rang the doorbell until he heard a crash followed by a string of colourful curses.
Perfect.
"What?" All of a sudden, the door was wrenched open, revealing a very disheveled Fuuko Kirisawa. She was barefoot, her oversized shirt rumpled and her hair sticking out in places. It was obvious that she just dragged herself out of bed.
Fuuko glared at Mikagami. The glare, however, was lost on the man when he noticed that her other eye was still closed. Plus, she was almost cute when she was mad and out of sorts.
He smirked.
"Do you know what time it is?" Fuuko bit out, still glaring at him with one eye.
Mikagami made a show of checking his watch even though he already knew. "It's ten in the morning." Which normal people would probably consider as Way Past Time to Wake Up, but it was too early for a night owl like Fuuko.
"Just as I thought," Fuuko mumbled as she started to close the door on her unexpected, and definitely unwanted, visitor.
Unfortunately, Mikagami already had a foot inside and forcibly pushed his way past her. "No time for that."
"It's too early in the morning to be trading barbs with you, Mi-chan. Try calling again in a couple of hours and I just might be awake enough to humor you."
"I've come to collect a debt, Kirisawa," he told her as shoved the cup of coffee at her.
"At ten o'clock in the morning?" Fuuko asked as she accepted the offered drink and took a suspicious sip. Satisfied that there was nothing fishy inside, she gulped it down. "Mmm." With the sudden boost from the caffeine, she found enough strength to open both eyes.
"No time like the present."
"Why?" Fuuko led the way to the couch where she curled up with her coffee. "Isn't the payment for my non-existent debt supposedly dinner tonight? It's still too early."
"As if I'll take you out to dinner without pre-approving your choice of clothes."
"Hey!" Fuuko protested as Mikagami started to poke his head from room to room until he found her bedroom. "No trespassing!"
But she was too late. By the time she made it to her bedroom, Mikagami was already elbow-deep in her closet. "Mikagami!"
"Just as I thought." Mikagami gave her the same attention he would give to an annoying gnat. "You have nothing decent to wear."
"I was planning on buying an outfit later!" Came her indignant reply. Only Fuuko's sheer will kept her from decking Mikagami.
"Knowing you, you'll probably buy the first outfit you try on that fits."
"Your point being?" Fuuko merely intensified her glare. He was right. She hated shopping and would probably do everything in her power to make the experience short and painless.
"This is your lucky day, Kirisawa." Mikagami told her as he glanced disapprovingly at Fuuko's closet. "I just happen to be available today at your disposal."
"You?" Fuuko snorted. "What do you know about clothes?"
"A lot more than you, apparently," was his reply as he lifted a tangerine polka-dot blouse.
"That was Ganko's present!"
"When she was seven, I'd bet. She has more taste now."
Ganko was nine when she gave the gift, but Mikagami did not have to know about that. He was insufferable enough as he was.
Fuuko was woman enough to admit that she was wrong. Who would have thought that Mikagami knew his way around a woman's boutique? Even if his contributions were limited to a couple of decisive murmurs of "No, not that," and "Try this on, Kirisawa."
The moment the two of them stepped in the clothing store, where a dress cost one year of Fuuko's salary, Mikagami took charge of the shopping expedition. He charmed the salespeople inside into picking and choosing outfits that would fit his companion.
One dress after another were removed from the racks, plucked from the storage rooms and unpacked from boxes until one genius of a saleswoman took out an emerald green halter dress.
And Fuuko Kirisawa, tomboy-extraordinaire, promptly fell in love.
The dress was bold. The dress was daring. The dress was Fuuko.
"I think we have a winner." Mikagami murmured. "Try it on, Kirisawa."
Mutely, Fuuko followed the salesperson into the changing room.
"We'll take it." Mikagami told the salesperson the moment Fuuko stepped out.
The dress would have overwhelmed a lesser woman, but it was perfect for Fuuko's body and personality.
"Hey!" Fuuko protested, more because of some perverse desire to be contrary than any objection to the dress. "I'll be the judge of that."
"Well?" Came the impatient reply.
"We'll take it." She told the salesperson primly.
"Good." Mikagami said as he handed his credit card to the cashier.
"Hey! My dress, my money," Fuuko said as she tried to locate her purse, buried somewhere underneath the discarded dresses.
"Think of it as a gift, Kirisawa."
"But—"
Mikagami simply waved her objections off. The salesperson and the cashier, used to Mikagami being in-charge, quickly rang up the sale.
Fuuko felt like a kept woman. She just was not sure if that was necessarily a bad thing.
Fuuko learned that there were a lot of perks in befriending a chef who owned his own restaurant. After shopping, Fuuko declared herself hungry and Mikagami drove them to Ensui, which was already full of people enjoying lunch. However, Mikagami simply hustled Fuuko into the kitchen where he commandeered a workstation that was isolated from the usual hustle and bustle of a busy restaurant. Instead of ordering his staff to wait on them hand and foot, Mikagami simply gathered his own ingredients and started preparing lunch.
"She dumped you because you what?" Fuuko demanded incredulously.
Mikagami glared at her without breaking his stride slicing thin pieces of fish.
Fuuko tried desperately to stifle her laugh, having learned long ago the wisdom of not laughing at a man holding a sharp knife.
"Pay attention, Kirisawa," Mikagami set aside the slivers of flesh he cut up and started mixing up various ingredients in a tiny saucer. "Because this will be the last time I'll repeat myself."
Fuuko did not say anything but her grin grew wider.
"Marie did not dump me." He told her. "I simply told her that we were not working out." Having finished mixing numerous ingredients together, Mikagami grabbed a pair of chopsticks and a table napkin. He then took a sliver of fish, dipped it in the mixed ingredients, and offered it to Fuuko, placing the napkin under her chin to protect her clothes.
"Because she wanted to tie you up?" Fuuko asked sweetly before biting the fish off the chopsticks. She chewed and swallowed. "The sauce needs a little more oomph."
Mikagami's glare darkened as he added an ingredient into the liquid concoction. "She was normal when I asked her out."
"Yeah, yeah. That's what they all say," Fuuko waved her hand in an airy gesture before trying to steal a piece of fish with her fingers.
Mikagami slapped her straying hand away. "She didn't seem to be the type who's into bondage." He grumbled as he handed her a new pair of chopsticks.
"How typical of a man to be scared of a strong woman who goes after what she wants." Fuuko laughed. She took a slice of fish and dipped it into the improvised sauce and nodded her approval.
"She had metal restraints bolted on the wall beside her bed, Kirisawa."
"What, you were getting hot and heavy in her bedroom and suddenly, she cuffed you?"
Mikagami's silence was answer enough.
"So why do you need a date again? Why not just go stag? Or not go at all?"
"Patriarch's order." He replied, referring to his paternal grandfather. "An invitation is tantamount to a royal summons. Ignore under pain of death."
Fuuko smiled, thinking of her own autocratic grandmother.
"The benefit dinner is to raise funds for the foundation my sister's chairing. Whatever my sister wants, the Patriarch gets for her." He continued.
"And your desperation to get a date?" Fuuko prompted.
"The entire clan is going to be there. If I show up without a date, my mother will get on my case." Mikagami suppressed a shudder. "She wanted grandchildren. I think she already gave up on my sister, who's even more of a workaholic than I am. So that leaves me."
"Ah. So if you show up with a date, you could fend her off by saying that at least you're trying to find your one true love."
"Exactly."
"Clever."
"I thought so too." He then plated the fish and the sauce and pushed it in front of Fuuko.
"I can't believe I turn to you for romantic advice. Your love life's more pathetic than mine."
To be continued.
(soon, I hope)