Chapter 20

What I Don't Know Won't Hurt Me?

The next day I went to see Chase and he gave me a clean bill of health. I had been weaned off the Prednisone and was surprised to find my mind was clearing. I could hear thoughts, but they would come in dribs and drabs. But every hour since I'd been off the Prednisone I was getting my intuition back. I was also losing water like mad, making me look even thinner. My face, which looked like a moon pie when I was on the prednisone, was almost back to normal.

I love to go out to dances and balls. But having to find an entire outfit in one day while still feeling a little weak, wasn't going to be easy. Especially since I had to buy the outfit and then go out that night with no real chance to recuperate.

It had turned cold so I spent the day shopping mostly at Macy's where they were having a big sale. I had clipped the 15% coupon out of the newspaper and spent my time combing through the racks. But, I found nothing. I went to Bloomingdales and found nothing. I was getting desperate so I went down to BCBG and ended up finding a dress that the salesladies all ooohhed and ahhhhed over. It had a low plunging neckline, the two strips of material that covered my breasts attached at a cumberbund at my waist. The gown was made out of an electric blue satin that had a trumpet skirt down to the floor. I was in such a hurry, I didn't do the three point test. I didn't check to see if I could sit down, if I could bend over or if I could go pee. I bought the dress and some silver satin, open-toed, three inch pumps.

I arrived home and found Greg ready except for tying his bow tie and putting on his jacket.

"You're cutting it close. The event start at 6:00 and it's 4:30 now."

I freaked, "Okay, I'll be ready."

I ran up the stairs with my packages and straight into the bathroom to start my shower. It took me an hour to put myself together. I had on full battle makeup, dangling earrings, and suck-me-in panties. I put shoulder-length my hair back in a French knot. I frankly didn't know if I looked good or not. I slipped on my shoes and was almost out the door when I realized I didn't have on my wedding rings.

Frustration rang in Greg's voice, "Auri, I'm going to go warm up the car, hurry up."

"Okay, I'll be there in just a minute."

I ran to Greg's drawer and searched through it, finding my wedding rings. They fit better than before, but were still loose. I ran into the bathroom and grabbed a band-aid to put on the back of the bands. I slipped the rings on and the band-aid made them fit tight, almost too tight. I grabbed the velvet coat I had just purchased and ran down the stairs. Furey and his babysitter looked up.

Furey was staring, mouth open like a fish.

The girl simply said, "You look beautiful."

"Thanks. Mind yourself, Furey. And go to bed by ten."

He finally nodded, "Auri, you look so different. Like one of those girls at a fashion show on tv."

I ruffled his hair, grabbed a black scarf and black gloves, put them and the coat on and was out the door. Jumping in the front seat, I could feel that Greg was perturbed at me, but I was doing the best I could.

"Do I look okay?" I asked him.

"I don't know what you look like considering I've been out here in the dark. I'll check you out at the Gala."

He said it with a little edge to his voice, meaning he was still pissed at me for taking so long and making us almost late. We arrived a little after six and discovered that the first hour wasn't the awards ceremony, it was the cocktail hour. We could have strolled in anytime during the hour and been just fine. As soon as we entered the building we saw Wilson without Jennifer. He waved at us and we went over to the coat check. Greg took his coat off and handed it to me, then took off for the bar.

Wilson looked at me, "What was that about?"

"I got home late and he's been waiting for me. He was a little pissed off that I had to rush around at the last minute. Where's Jennifer?"

"She's ready to pop, the baby's dropped." He grinned, "I could get a page tonight! But, I'm supposed to give out an oncology award, so I decided to attend. Besides, she looks forward to time alone."

I handed the coat clerk my coat, gloves and scarf. Turning back to Wilson, I was surprised to see him staring at me, bug-eyed. "Jim?"

He shook his head and blew out of his mouth, "I can see why it took all day to find that dress. It's very uh…attractive."

His comments were unusual so I tried desperately to read his mind. I picked up a few words like, sexy, inappropriate, breasts, do her. I realized that he was conflicted, part of him thought the dress was too sexy for the event and the other part was enjoying a fantasy about screwing me. I ran to the bathroom and looked in the mirror.

What was I thinking? The dress shows off every curve of my body, the shape of my nipples and standing sideways you can see most of my breast. And I'm wearing it to a doctor's function? Oh, this isn't going to go well.

I stepped out and started to cross to the coat check. I was going to grab a cab home. But I heard Greg call out, "Auri?" He was standing half way down the room surrounded by other doctors. I turned and looked at him.

The whole room turned and looked at me. No one said anything.

I heard his voice, "Holy shit, Auri." He walked towards me and held out his hand. I walked down the two steps to him and took his hand. He leaned in and whispered, "You have a beautiful body and now everyone knows it."

Whew, what a dress. Cuddy's going to have apoplexy when she sees how hot she is. The donors' wives are probably going to find it inappropriate. But, what the hell, it sure is a showstopper. Every straight guy in here is going to want a piece of her.

His thoughts came through loud and clear.

I looked down at my feet, "I realize it's not appropriate. I'm going to take a taxi home."

He smiled at me, slipped an arm around my satin waist and kissed the side of my head. "Let me buy you a drink." I looked up into his crinkled blue eyes. Kissing me on the mouth, he sent a message to every male in the room that I was going to go home with him. We stayed like that, his arm around my waist for awhile.

He whispered again, "I think the dress rocks and is just what this place needs."

"No, I think I should go home." I pulled him over to the side, just out of view of the others to talk to him. He slipped his hand around and between my arm and my dress, through the armhole, wrapping his fingers around my breast. I was bright red and excited at the same time. "Greg, don't feel me up here."

He was breathing hard into the side of my head, "You practically advertise in that dress. Just let me play a little with that nipple." He reached around and twisted my nipple in his finger.

"Let's go sit down." I pulled away, his hand falling awkwardly out of my dress.

"Fine."

I sat down, but Greg continued to walk around and talk to some of the Residents. I watched him talking to his team and then he finally came over, sat down, and poured himself a glass of wine.

The program took an hour and then music started. Greg had received a rather impressive gift, "To Dr. Gregory House, For Making Residents Think Outside the Box." Greg tried to act nonchalant, but he was secretly chuffed to get the award.

"I'm proud of you." I reached up and put my left hand on his right. I could feel a strong affection as he turned to look at me.

"Auri, I'm not good at expressing my feelings, but this last month has been," He smiled, looking down at our hands. The smile dropped and his face contorted into pain. Jumping up, he pulled my hand with him as he backed away from the table.

"What the fuck are you doing with my wife's rings?" he yelled.

I was embarrassed, not knowing what I had done, what to say to such an obvious question. But, I could feel that he was genuinely angry, "Greg?"

He started pulling at the rings which were wedged tightly on my finger by the band aid. My knuckle felt as if it was going to be yanked off.

"What is wrong with you? Who the hell do you think you are?" He wouldn't stop pulling.

"Greg, you're hurting me." I tried to pull back.

Wilson jumped up, "House, stop that!"

"Where did you get them? Answer me!"

I started crying, "I don't understand, they're mine, you gave them to me when we were married."

Wilson and Greg both stopped in their tracks and looked at me, mouths open, eyes wide in disbelief. I could feel their disapproval, as if I had said something horrible. I grabbed my purse and ran for the door, stopping to get my coat, gloves and hat.

As I rushed out, I could see Wilson trying to hold Greg back, his anger palpable from where I stood. I took off into the cold night and started walking as fast as my three inch heels could carry me. I found a coffee shop and went inside to get warm, ordering hot chocolate, I sat down at a table.

I opened the gate and searched for Greg. A flood of emotions pounded me. Anger, confusion, worry, affection, disappointment all hit me as I tried to read him.

What is wrong with her? Why does she have Teagan's rings? Damn her, who the hell does she think she is? Married? Is that some sad attempt to get me down the aisle? Furey knows something about this. I know he does.

It was clear that he didn't think we were married. I thought back to the day that he asked me. Furey and Greg were both in suits. We were all sitting at a table in a restaurant. Greg ordered champagne. I don't remember what I was wearing, which made me suspicious. It's strange that I can't remember what I wore on the day I got engaged.

"Furey and I have something to ask you." He nodded to Furey who reached in his pocket and gave Greg the ring box. Sliding it over to me, Greg and Furey said together, "Will you marry us?"

But the scene was both familiar and unfamiliar. Familiar because I had seen something similar in a Disney movie, unfamiliar because I didn't remember the name of the restaurant, where the restaurant was, the clothes I wore or what we did before or after. I was beginning to think my memory wasn't real.

Furey knows something about this. I know he does.

Greg was sure that Furey knew something. Furey wanted us to marry so much. He loved the idea of us all being a family. Were these my memories or Furey's? The rings. They're Teagan's rings. Furey gave them to me. Furey. Oh, how could he do this to me?

I sat in the coffee shop for an hour sorting through my thoughts, trying to decipher what was real and what wasn't. Then I walked. I walked for at least an hour until my feet screamed out for relief. I grabbed a cab back to the townhouse, knocking on the door. The door opened with a woosh, Greg standing with his tux coat off and tie undone.

"Where…" He started to yell, but stopped himself. "Where have you been? I've been combing the streets looking for you.

"I just needed to think." I took off my coat hung it up.

"We need to talk about…"

I held up a hand, "Apparently prednisone does more than just calm inflammation, it's messed up my mind and my abilities. I'm seeing much clearer now. But, I am very tired, extremely tired. Can we talk about this in the morning?" I looked at him, my eyes ready to cry.

He was poised to say something, but held back, "Sure."

"I'll sleep on your sofa bed in the guest room."

He nodded.

I walked up the stairs. As I did, I opened the gate. He was thinking about having sex with me. After all this, he was thinking about how I looked in the dress and how much he wanted to take it off me. I turned and looked at him. He was gorgeous, standing there with the bowtie hanging around his neck, top button undone. If I had just slipped my strap down slowly, allowed it to slide down the curve of my breast until the tip of my nipple revealed itself, he would have forgotten and forgiven everything. But, the next day it would have turned into regret and further embarrassment for both of us. I was already humiliated beyond belief. I wanted nothing from him, except to let me slink out of his life for good.

I went to the bedroom and waited. I heard his door open and close. After an hour I slipped downstairs with a shopping bag. In the cellar, sitting on the dryer, was a pile of my clean clothes. I picked out an outfit that I could wear and put it on. I packed the rest in the shopping bag and then searched for my sneakers which I found in the mud room next to the kitchen. Grabbing my coat, I walked over to side table and took off Teagan's rings. I put them, and my love for the life I had lived for the last eight weeks behind on the table.

I turned the knob quietly and gingerly walked to the cab I had ordered with my shopping bag. I arrived at the airport and within minutes I had a flight at 5:30 am for San Diego…free. Most airlines love having an FBI agent riding on their planes. I arrived back at my house in San Diego around one in the afternoon, opening the doors and windows to air out the house.