1chapter 1- Flashbacks in Fours
leaving before you
You wake up and stretch your hand out across the bed, searching for the person you finally admitted your feelings for. You find only cold sheets. Opening your eyes you see a folded note with your name in a familiar scrawl that makes you smile. You quickly open the note.
I'm sorry.
These two words cause the smile on your face to fade into a confused scowl. "What was there to be sorry for last night was incredible." You mumble to yourself still trying to wake up fully.
The next line proved that as you read the very thing you had just thought.
Last night was incredible, I hope you thought so too.
I also hope you can understand that it can never happen again.
I'm going to put in a transfer, I'll be gone by next week.
I can't stand the thought of you leaving so I'm going to save you the trouble.
Goodbye
You quickly reach for your cell only to curse when you see that you have no battery. You jump out of bed only to get tangled in the sheets and trip and land right back in bed. You kick off the blankets and run to the kitchen to grab the phone there. You dial his cell only to get an automated voice telling you that "the person you are trying to reach is unavailable" and "leave a message after the beep." Only when you go to leave a message you find that the voice mail box is full and you can't. You call all his numbers, his cell, his home, his office but he doesn't answer any of them.
little white stick
You are sitting on the cold floor of the bathroom holding a tiny stick that has just told you your future is going to change whether you want it to or not. You quickly grab your cell phone just as the tears start to fall. You desperately want to call speed dial number one but you know he won't answer, in fact you're not even sure that is still his number. Part of you hope it isn't well the other part of you wishes it still is and that he hasn't completely cut you off.
You dial number two and hope she will answer. She does on the fourth ring slightly out of breath. You choke out her name before the sobs overcome you to the point where your throat fells desert dry and your hands shake till you drop the phone.
She quickly calls your name asking what is wrong. You manage two words before you can speak no more "I'm pregnant."
You hear her try to conceal a tiny squeal before she gasps and says two things "It's his, isn't" and "I'll be right over" not even waiting for confirmation.
comfort
You hear the front door open but you don't move form your position curled up on the bath mat.
'It's only Angela' you think 'it' s never going to be him again'
You hear the footsteps stop and glance up to see her framed in the doorway. As your eyes catch sight of the tears in hers more begin to well up from inside of you.
"Ange..." is all you can get out before yet another sob overcomes you. She sits down next to you and wraps her arms around you, not saying anything, understanding that what you really need is the one thing she cannot give you.
"Why?" Is the first thing you say as you start to calm down. There are a dozen different questions that one word could mean.
She doesn't answer your question, only hugs you tighter and whispers a quiet "I'm sorry" into your hair.
***
After a while you both move into the lounge and settle into the couch. It's Angela's turn to ask a question now. "So what are you going to do?" It's a simple question with a not so simple answer.
"I'm not sure" you reply.
You know adoption is not a choice not after what you went through.
Abortion doesn't sound so good either because you know you can not bring yourself to destroy the last piece of him you have.
"I guess, I'll keep it" you say softly a few minutes later.
Angela nods and replies "Whatever you need I'm there for you."
after delivery
POV- Angela
You really dislike that rule about only the father or significant other being allowed in the room during the caesarian. On second thought maybe not, you would probably pass out watching.
You are pacing back and forth like a caged lioness waiting for the nurse to come get you so you can see Bren and her baby. Brennan did not want to know what the sex of the child was before hand so you are eager to find out.
Finally the nurse comes and says you can see her now. You practically run to Bren's room. As you walk in the door you see Bren sitting on the bed holding a tiny pink bundle.
"It's a girl." you say, knowing you are stating the obvious. "Did you decide on the name yet?"
Brennan nods and looks up at you. "Celia Christine"
"I get her middle name but why her first?"
"For Booth, it's the closest to Seeley"
You know you're playing devil's advocate when you ask "Why?" but you couldn't resist. "He hurt you why would you name her after him."
"Because she is still his daughter." She says followed softly by "and I can't hate him."
AN: I know the name has been chosen before or a variety of it, but that's what I wanted so I picked it. It's really not that unique, but oh well.