Diary of a Snake
Dear Smexy-Sasu-chan,
Sasuke found my old diary today! Then he tore it up into a million teeny tiny pieces and burned it to ashes! Then he beat me with a giant baseball bat and then he left! It was so mean! I got a new diary. This one's purple, which is so smexy! YAY FOR A NEW SMEXY DIARY!!!! Well, since this is a new diary, it needs a new, smexy, diary name! hmmmmmmm. What is as smexy as Smexy-sasu-chan? hmmmmmmmm. OMG. I know! Mini-Oro-Chan! I now dub thee, mini-oro-chan! Cause you're like, a miniature version of the ever so smexy me! YAY!
Sincerely,
Orochimarou
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Dear Mini-Oro-Chan,
OMG, THAT IS SUCH AN UBER-SMEXY NAME! YAY. I'm bored though. Sasuke wouldn't come out of his room today. I tried getting Manda to open the door for me, but the stupid not-so-smexy snake said that he wouldn't help me pry open an under-aged boy's door, and then he disappeared. Stupid non-smexy snake. I'm so bored. Well, I think I'll go to the nearest village that way I can grab a flame torch and burn my way through the door. Of course, I'll do it smexily, as I always do everything smexily, because I'm, like, the smexiest guy in all of smexyism. Yep. Well, see ya.
Sincerely,
Orochimarou
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Dear Mini-Oro-Chan,
Sasuke still won't come out of his room. He says he's striking and that he won't come out until I swear to stay at least 5 feet away from him at all time. I'm not sure that I'd be able to stay five whole feet around my ever so smexy sasu-chan! I must find a way! Why? because, I'm awesome. that's why. so ha. ha ha ha. ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. Why am I writing ha? wait, i know! IT'S BECAUSE I'M AWESOME! MHUA HA HA HA HA HA. BOW TO THE AWESOMENESS, PEOPLE! BOW! heh. OMG, I JUST REALIZED SOMETHING. My tounge is longer than 5 feet! I HAVE FOUND A WAY AROUND THE EVILNESS! MHUA HA HA HA HA.
Sincerely,
Orochimarou
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